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2010-11-09 04:13:59
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2014-07-01 [Teufelsweib]: I am Spartacus!

2014-07-01 [Viking]: As played by Kirk Douglas?

2014-07-07 [Avaz]: I. AM. SPARTA!

...wait, that's not how it goes. Shit.

2014-07-08 [Teufelsweib]: you jinxed it >_O

2014-07-08 [Avaz]: Dammit. I'll show myself to the door. :/

2014-07-09 [Viking]: I'm assuming that since that is a link to an image rather than in inlined image that I shouldn't click on it at work =)

2014-07-09 [Triola]: It's fine, I'm just writing from my phone, and everything is a bit more of a hassle, so I couldn't be bothered :P

2014-07-09 [Viking]: Ah, okay!

2014-07-17 [Linderel]: A week of silence on now? What the crap, guys?

2014-07-17 [Teufelsweib]: whoops, whatsapp has been so busy I almost forgot about the most important random chat group!

2014-07-17 [Sunrose]: Bwahaha but now soccer is over we can go back to normal :P

2014-07-17 [Teufelsweib]: or now we can get excited over regular football!
I myself am for ADO Den Haag, because if you're not they'll beat you up when you're there :P

2014-07-17 [Sunrose]: You'd have to switch teams a lot, because that happens in other cities too if you're not for their team :P

2014-07-17 [Teufelsweib]: yep, and I do :P but the last time it happened to me I was in the Hague, so that's my team atm :P

2014-07-17 [Sunrose]: Bwahah :P

2014-07-20 [hanhepi]: You said "regular football", and I thought you were going all 'Merican on me and fixin' to start talking about the NFL. >.<

2014-07-20 [ally]: That's "handegg".

2014-07-20 [hanhepi]: I like that. I might have to start lobbying for an official name change.

2014-07-20 [Viking]: <img300*0:>

2014-07-21 [ally]: Its name.

2014-07-21 [Viking]: Yeah, tell that to whomever created that image.

2014-07-21 [Avaz]: Word crimes.

2014-07-21 [Sunrose]: amg

2014-07-27 [Reaper89]: I dont know what's going on but I ate a brownie one time.

2014-07-27 [Viking]: Was it a special brownie?

2014-07-28 [Avaz]: Only one time?

2014-08-08 [Company Awesome]: Handegg. I like that.

2014-08-08 [blaze12]: Hi?

2014-08-08 [ally]: Ho!

2014-08-08 [Sunrose]: Hai!

2014-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Hoe!

2014-08-08 [Stephen]: ... It's off to work we go? <img:44166_1164145305.gif>

2014-08-22 [KillMeRomantikly]: o.O

2014-08-22 [Paul Doyle]: It's the Finest Worksong? (It's the finest hour . . . )

If anybody below the age of 30 gets that reference, they get a hundred thousand chocolate-chip cookie points (because brownie points are just so overrated)

2014-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Are they gluten free?

2014-08-27 [Paul Doyle]: Virtually.

2014-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's okay, I have some extra gluten I can sprinkle on them.

2014-08-28 [Reaper89]: It was a special brownie! Talk about awesome! Sadly only had one wish I could have had more lol

2014-08-28 [Paul Doyle]: What else was in the brownie?

2014-08-28 [Avaz]: Crushed hopes and dreams.

2014-08-28 [Teufelsweib]: and eggs

2014-08-28 [Avaz]: And probably sugar. Or Stevia, if you're a hippie.

2014-08-28 [ally]: Stevia is not for baking. Tastes horrible.

2014-08-28 [Avaz]: What about truvia?

2014-08-28 [Viking]: I thought hippies preferred honey or sugar.

2014-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: My Stevia tastes like ricin.

2014-08-29 [Avaz]: Yeah, man.

2014-08-29 [Paul Doyle]: In a pinch, there's always rolled oregano.

2014-08-29 [Avaz]: Well, if the oregano is pinched, it's not rolled oregano anymore.

2014-09-11 [The Black Goat]: So ETchat is just a wiki page with comments?

I'm mildly dissapointed

2014-09-11 [Viking]: There's also a real-time chat, but I forget the link.

2014-09-11 [Teufelsweib]: elfchat

2014-09-11 [Viking]: Yeah, that's the one.

2014-09-11 [The Black Goat]: ah, tried installing the javascript and it failed, sadface

2014-09-17 [Poxnora]: Guys I am new here can anyone help me out. ....?

2014-09-17 [kians mummy]: If you need a hand message a council member or i can help. X

2014-09-20 [Reaper89]: *takes off hand and throws it to ya* here's a hand yo

2014-09-22 [kians mummy]: Lol

2014-10-13 [Kalma]: I am looking for new friends who are interested in creating art, role playing, and chatting about life.. Take a look at my house and message me if you'd like!

2014-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a lot of people like that over at Bob's Diner! They usually have a lot of interesting, deep conversations.

2014-10-13 [Kalma]: Thanks

2014-10-13 [Kalma]: Did I do it right? <img:44166_1164145171.gif>

2014-10-20 [Rainvine]: I havent used this website since i was 15... Im 24 now and my house is so outdated i dont want to change anything in my profile. All the memories of my teenage years online :D i remember when elfwood was super popular, more so than deviantart

2014-10-20 [Sunrose]: Welcome back :D

2014-10-20 [Rainvine]: Thank you Sunrose, how are you?

2014-10-20 [Sunrose]: I'm well, and you? :)

2014-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Your favorite wiki, Bob's Diner, is still here for you.

2014-10-21 [cute-angel]: anyone can help me use this site?

2014-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: The people at Bob's Diner can.

2014-10-22 [Avaz]: Technically they can, but realistically they probably won't.

2014-10-22 [Teufelsweib]: that might just have been the best possible answer

2014-10-23 [ally]: I usually refer people to the help page.
Edit (which actually looks better organized than I thought it would be).
But yeah the active wikis are probably bob's diner and this one.

2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: <poll:77483>

Yeah! I put a link to it here too!

2014-11-27 [Avoral]: Robots are pretty cool.

2015-01-16 [Kalma]: Who doesn't like a good robot, now and then...

2015-01-24 [EnigmaFlame]: It's been many moons...

2015-01-24 [Paul Doyle]: Keith Moon

2015-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I KEEP TELLING YOU, IT'S THE SAME MOON, DAMMIT.

Different sun though.

2015-02-02 [Avaz]: That's no moon!

2015-02-03 [Paul Doyle]: New Moon on Monday

2015-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: New Moon on DVD

2015-02-03 [Paul Doyle]: Frank & Moon Unit Zappa

2015-02-03 [Viking]: Don't forget about Dwezil Zappa (Moon Unit's brother).

2015-02-04 [Paul Doyle]: Ahmet Rodan Zappa, too.

2015-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Not to mention Mothra Zappa, Gamera Zappa, and Ghidorah Zappa. And even Mechazappa!

2015-02-04 [Viking]: Oh, yeah, the kids of uncle Kaiju Zappa. Can't forget them!

2015-02-04 [Atossa]: hi

2015-02-04 [Viking]: Hullo!

2015-02-04 [ally]: Hallo!

2015-02-05 [Paul Doyle]: Howdy-ho!

2015-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Hollo!

2015-02-06 [Avaz]: Olloh!

2015-02-06 [Sunrose]: He-ya

2015-02-09 [Atossa]: anyone here

2015-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Not really, no. However, there are tons of people over at Bob's Diner! TONS!

2015-02-10 [Viking]: That's only 3 really big people.

2015-02-10 [Paul Doyle]: Bob's Whiner

2015-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, it's just Misty's bloated corpse.

2015-02-10 [Anvikit]: *Points above* ^ seems legit

2015-02-10 [Viking]: It does. *nodnods*

2015-02-13 [Avaz]: Phew, what a relief. For a moment there, I thought it was Bob's Weiner.

2015-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you worry, Bob's Weiner is safely tucked between my warm, greasy, mayo covered buns. Luckily, I got some big buns, because Bob's Weiner is so long and thick that it almost won't all fit.

But at least we're talking about Bob's Weiner. I thought for a second there we were talking about Bob's Penis.

2015-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: So, suggestions on the Elftown app? I assume everyone wants it to look like it was the first app ever made 10 years ago? And with plenty of Bob's Diner advertisements and constant updates and reminders about Bob's Diner?


2015-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Someone make me some damn icons, so it doesn't look so horrible.

2015-03-17 [Sunrose]: Hahaha yea nice and retro :P

2015-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: It would seem pretty weird to be able to access Elftown in a non-retro way at this point.

2015-03-18 [Viking]: You should make a Blackberry or PalmOS app.

2015-06-19 [Neferoth, the lethargic stigmata]: Hay, I`d do the mobile app... Even with Bobs Diner@wiki

Course that`s not nearly ALL I would do.. Oh and hi people.


2015-07-31 [Ms.Mouse]: hm

2015-07-31 [Ms.Mouse]: okay lol

2015-09-03 [The Doll Mage]: Is the app really a thing?

2015-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: A sad, incomplete thing, yes.

2015-10-01 [Kalma]: whaaaaat... I need to log on more - apparently things are moving fast on Elftown (hah).

Does anyone know what happened to Sunrose?

2015-10-02 [Teufelsweib]: she left

2015-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: She got [SilverFire] to ban her, because she didn't want to come back. And, of course, that was because of [Mortified Penguin].

2015-11-12 [Neferoth, the lethargic stigmata]: So she was harassed so much she asked to be removed; more or less?

How is the rest of this dwindling community?

2015-11-14 [Company Awesome]: I'm alright.

2016-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: HI. (update as of 2016-05-09: I accidentally deleted the comment above this one from someone that said "hello"... woops)

2016-03-18 [Viking]: Hawai'i

2016-03-24 [pelv13]: 'ello all... anything new and exciting in your lives today?

2016-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I saw a lizard last week. If that counts.

2016-04-05 [pelv13]: it's more than seems to be happening for anyone else, so i would say that i very well may... i think we can make that judgement call after hearing the measurement of said lizard...

2016-05-05 [Zesvrae Auvryndar]: Hello.

2016-05-07 [Paul Doyle]: *wakes up* Yep yep, welcome to the Elftown Museum, not quite as majestic as the Great Pyramids or the Great Wall of China, but a preserved relic nonetheless *goes back to sleep*

2016-05-27 [Forest Sage]: Hello everybody what is going on in the elftown world today?

2016-07-27 [The Doll Mage]: Dude... I'm 25 now. I think I discovered this place when I was 12. Thirteen years.

2016-07-28 [Viking]: Oh, [The Doll Mage], you should visit activeonelftown!

2016-11-16 [AdamTheChespin]: Hey folks!

2016-11-16 [Viking]: Hey!

2016-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: STOP YELLING AT ME!!

2017-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]:

2017-03-07 [NightTheOwl]: Are many of us here former users back from our teen years and now grown tf up looking back and realizing where time has gone??

2017-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Not really, no.

2017-03-09 [font]: Oh how this place has changed but seems so familar. 

2017-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner should seem familiar; I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU TO GO THERE FOR TWELVE YEARS NOW.

2017-03-26 [font]: Haha! 12 years wow :p

2017-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... uh huh... *eats ramen*... *slowly reaches for his hatchet*...

2017-03-27 [Viking]: *steals the hatchet*

2017-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, that's a nifty hatchet! I have one just like it.

*continues slowly reaching toward where his hatchet used to be*

*eats some more ramen in the meantime*

2017-03-29 [font]: you do know hatchets are sharp and dangerous!

2017-10-15 [AdamTheChespin]: Hello ghost town chat.

2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Hello, unsuspecting rube. Have you heard about all the great deals Bob's Diner is having this week?

2017-12-08 [Infested_Zling]: Please tell me more Mort

2017-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: NO!

2018-01-23 [Infested_Zling]: god damnit mort! Always holdin out! I want them Deals and i want them now!

2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER! Our deals are a closely guarded secret. I would sooner die than reveal that our new turnip flavored slug sticks are now only $29.99!

2018-03-28 [brecht]: Hi, maybe ten yrs ago i saw this painting on elfwood called 'fire red', by mary catherine gutfleisch. Its got a dragons neck and head in it, not much else. I would really like to see it again! Could i get help on my quest of finding this image, or the artist to ask them if they can show it again pls pls, on the wide world of internet?

2018-03-28 [brecht]: -i cannot get into and am a total noob not knowing whats up with that. Am i the only one? Or did something happen to EW?

2018-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: If so, I think this is her Facebook:

2018-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: As for Elfwood, I think it died. As for Bob's Diner, GO THERE. COMMENT NOW. GREAT DEALS!!! *smashes [font] with a chair*

2018-03-29 [Paul Doyle]: I don't think Elfwood is going to reopen any time soon. I sure wish those who ran the site last (after Thomas Abrahamsson), have the grace to briefly reopen the site so the writers/artists could reclaim their stuff, and then come forward and admit the obvious: Elfwood is dead and gone. Then they ought to shut it down forever.

2018-03-30 [brecht]: Awww thats sad! Why? And thank, mort. I sent her a message.

2018-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Now go eat at Bob's Diner.

2018-12-08 [AdamTheChespin]: Boop

2019-03-27 [bear_28]: Hello!! :)

2019-04-01 [Infested_Zling]: ello

2019-04-06 [AdamTheChespin]: How are things here?

2019-04-09 [*Sunflower*]: Is anyone even still here?

2019-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: No, everyone is at Bob's Diner.

2019-06-15 [Alendre]: This is a trip

2019-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: How about you take a trip on over to Bob's Diner?

2019-08-26 [Infested_Zling]: i did and i stumbled back here


2019-09-11 [carpet]: Hey guys. What's new?

2019-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, for today only, we're having a buy-one-don't-get-shot sale! If you buy one of our premium Get Out Of Getting Shot passes today, you can avoid being shot until tomorrow! Passes cost $500. *cocks his shotgun*

2019-10-06 [Mr poulo]: Hello everyone am just new how is it going

2019-10-11 [Paul Doyle]: Yes, the website technology of Elftown will proudly stride into the 21st Century any time now.

2019-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll see. It'll be considered retro and hip in the Roarin' 20's.

2019-10-16 [Lothuriel]: I think everyone should ditch FaceSpace and come back to ET. Just saying.

2019-11-19 [Alendre]: Agreed

2019-11-25 [Paul Doyle]: <poll:77505>

2020-02-22 [Rainvine]: HelloOoOoOo

2020-02-22 [Rainvine]: I used this website as a kid

2020-02-23 [Paul Doyle]: While you get older, this site will be trapped in time, from when Pepperidge Farms remembers the website technology was almost caught up to the norm. But not really.

2020-04-11 [Neferoth, the lethargic stigmata]: I.. I member.

2020-06-03 [999999999227747 3734]: Well i finally remembered my password after almost 4000 day... im deleting my time capsule, i dont trust the goverment, trying to go offline before going offgrid

2020-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: First, be sure to stop by Bob's Diner and PAY YOUR DAMN TAB.

2020-07-17 [TheAkky]: Greatings.

2020-08-23 [Sunrose]: Howdy!

2020-08-29 [Hannibal.]: Logging onto this for the first time in years. Feeling so nostalgic.
Missing the old crew on this.

2021-02-01 [gezza]: Hahahaha logging on like old times... Geez! I'm with u on that one hannibal

2021-06-10 [gdm413229]: Did you know that Elfwood was last run by Usify AB? To find out who was the last owner of Elfwood, enter these URLs on your web browser's address bar:

I remember seeing artwork on Elfwood, and hopefully others on Elftown will remember seeing artwork on Elfwood. I miss browsing's art gallery. :(

I just started a hashtag campaign on Twitter called #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain, and you can find out about this campaign in the link below.

2021-06-13 [Paul Doyle]: The "new owners" who promised the world for Elfwood (and then shut it down in very underhanded fashion) ought to be tarred and feathered, or just plain old class-action sued. Since ET was supposed to originally be an Elfwood e-community in an archaic digital era, the sting is real for those of us who spent so much time involved on Elfwood. But to be honest I think the world will end before Elfwood ever becomes fully functional, so I wouldn't put too much effort in trying to get an equally loathed and loved art website running again. I used to be a very passionate advocate of Elfwood (and ET's role as an Elfwood art e-community as opposed to all the bullshit that reduced and ruined Elftown to an interactive museum of sorts for a handful of people). But in any event, best of luck!

2021-06-13 [Paul Doyle]: (Regarding the loathing: If you were an artist or writer or both contending with the moderators, ERB, and the red-tape acceptance queue in the Elfwood Extranet, you will understand. The rules were applied very inconsistently and sometimes entire tickets were rejected because a tiny white gap from the scanner bed was showing on one image. Or other ridiculous technical issues. Meanwhile, other people had entire galleries up of blatantly rules-breaking kindergarden-quality lined-paper tracings of Sailor Moon and Goku and whoever else was kawaii or neko-this and neko-that)

2021-06-22 [gdm413229]: I'm not an artist and/or author on Elfwood, but I think some people on ET were artists and/or authors on Elfwood who have contended with Elfwood's moderators, the ERB and Elfwood's acceptance queue, which was full of red tape.

Speaking of the rules-violating kindergarten-quality tracings on Elfwood, it's a telltale sign that Elfwood's rules need to be consistently applied across the board. Thankfully, I don't remember stumbling upon the galleries full of kindergarten-quality tracings on Elfwood back when it was online.

Here's a petition for you to sign:

Speaking of class-action lawsuits, if the petition doesn't work, then you should consider working with your law firm in order to file a class-action lawsuit against Usify AB for causing psychological damage to those who spent large amounts of time uploading art and/or writing literature on Elfwood.

Here's the reason behind the campaign's petition and if required, the campaign's class-action lawsuit against Elfwood's "new owners", and the evidence of said psychological damage:
If you see similar tweets to the one linked above, then let me know, and these tweets could be used as reasons for filing the class-action lawsuit.

Speaking of the red tape in Elfwood's acceptance queue, it may have been so complex that it may have confused some artists and/or authors who operated on Elfwood.

If anyone were advocates for Elfwood, then please spread the petition like wildfire across Facebook, Twitter and other social media platforms! When Elfwood comes back online, don't forget to tell them to apply their rules in a perfectly consistent way!

We look forward to the day Elftown goes back to its original role: a sister site to Elfwood.

2021-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Most people don't know this about me, but I'm not a fan of red tape and excessive rules.

2021-07-07 [gdm413229]: Here's what happens when you point your browser to in 2021:

If you see the same and/or similar error message on your browser window to the one in the image linked above, then it's time to sign the petition linked below.

Your signatures go to , and I covet every signature that goes to this petition.

The best audience for this petition: Elftown members who were artists and/or writers on Elfwood.

Speaking of red tape, here's one way to get rid of it: (metaphorically speaking!)

2021-07-18 [gdm413229]: If anyone in Elftown both remembers Elfwood and makes memes, I have some memes to show you. The memes' link is

The guidelines and recommendations are in the first image's description, including the links to the tweets that carry the important images.

NEW: A meme has arrived in the same spot that features a bottle of bleach as a way to deal with the red tape!

UPDATE: I have read Elfwood's Facebook page, and their latest post mentions the cost of updating the site, which clocks in at an expensive $25k, and in order to get Elfwood back online, we have got to convince Usify AB to establish a crowdfunding campaign for the revival of!

Elfwood's Facebook page is:

Usify AB's general email address is: info at usify dot se

2021-07-21 [gdm413229]: If you're interested in my campaign, feel free to read my campaign's briefing, which is here: #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign.

2021-10-07 [gdm413229]: If anyone here runs his/her own Discord server, feel free to give me advice on creating a new Discord server for my #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign.

2021-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I run one. But very poorly. It may or may not still exist. Either way, I don't use or know how to use Discord. All the cool kids use Telegram instead anyway.

2021-10-12 [gdm413229]: I'm thinking of running a Discord server for my #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign, and a likely icon for said Discord server is the front of an AT4 launch tube (the AT4 is developed by a Swedish firm based in Linköping, where Elfwood was developed) with the campaign's name, including the 2014 version of the Elfwood logo as part of the campaign's name, printed on the front end of the tube.

Here's another #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain meme: <img500*0:stuff/aj/195242/meoa_at4_tube_meme_01.png>

The theme of my campaign is blasting the now-locked gates of Elfwood open with well-aimed shaped charge warheads that are originally designed to stop enemy armored vehicles dead in their tracks.

2021-10-22 [gdm413229]: The MEOA Press Kit is established for the first time! If you feel led to contribute files to the campaign's press kit, message me when you pay a visit to my house.

2021-10-31 [gdm413229]: I'm currently looking for a HDRI that represents the dense sylvan woods of Lothlorien for the MEOA Shaped Charge Warhead's renders. If you're willing to make me the Lothlorien HDRI background, feel free to do so.

I have an idea for a new contest on Elftown: it's the MEOA Promotional Art Contest.

The theme for the #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign is blasting Lothlorien's gates open with a HEAT round or two.

2021-10-31 [gdm413229]: If anyone here uses Facebook, Instagram and/or Whatsapp and is aware of the #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign, then I'm calling you to be representatives and spokespeople of my campaign on Facebook, Instagram and Whatsapp.

UPDATE 1: The MEOA Representative's Handbook is complete, so if you want to represent the #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign on Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, Reddit and/or any other platform on the internet, you could (and should) giving the handbook a good in-depth read and study.

UPDATE 2: Use this link to find out if Elfwood is down.

2021-11-30 [gdm413229]: I'm currently setting up a new Discord server specifically for the #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign, complete with military-themed names for the channel categories and the channels. I'm also setting up a Patreon profile that will also be used to fund my software development, composing, artistry and authoring endeavors, and a small portion (a tiny percentage) of funds from the Patreon will be used to fund the #MakeElfwoodOnlineAgain Campaign.

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