People come in many colors. But we only cum in one color... or should. If you cum in many colors, see a doctor immediately.
Weird dream:
So I guess I was back to being 16, and my parents and I moved to a city on an island into a condo. I know my room was huge but we were still unpacking so I was sleeping on a couch and when I went to sleep one night, I closed my eyes and saw a "Downloading Sleep" screen where my body, drawn in flash, slowly darkened until I was asleep. I slept in my dream. That's weird enough. But then I woke up and saw my neighbor was a pretty girl, who loved in the condo on the other side of the walk way and there was this muddy river, only about 30 feet wide, and she would go swimming in it and I would be to nervous to go introduce myself. I met some guy who loved next dor. He was dorky, kind of like Milhouse, but he just kinda hung around and didn't so much. Anyways one day I did introduce myself during this time when the river was almost empty and I saw the girl dumping buckets of brown paint into the water because the water was always a soupy brown in the dreams, like it was muddy. I invited her to follow me and the dorky kid to the city and all of a sudden this victory march started being played by a marching band leading this famous hockey player through the town. He stopped to talk to us and we all decided to go get some food at the mall food court so for some reason, mockingly I started trying to imitate the victory march through pursed lips as we went.
Weird weird weird. But the girl was cute. But she wasn't anyone I recognize from real life or from dreams I've had in the past.
http://www.you
Watch the video and understand where I'm coming from.
If you send me angry messages, you obviously didn't watch the video.
Had another ghost encounter on Friday.
Some kids had tried to sneak past the gym window to get to the Racketball court. They were on their cell phones in street cloths inviting more friends to come down and a girl no older than 14 and obviously stoned was coming up the stairs from the court where I met her and said her and her friends had to leave now. I went to the laundry room to get more towels and when I went back they were all gone. I thought I heard voices coming from out in the loading bay and opened the door to look around but saw nobody. When I closed the door and went around the corner, the door to the laundry room, which I had closed, and required a 3 digit code to open again, was starting to swing closed. I went through and nobody was there, and nobody had walked past me to come through the door and being a heavy and locked door no air current could have blown it open. The halls were completely empty at that time of the night.
My newest favorite insult EVER:
Your head looks like a penis that came out of the ass of a gay warthog!
I got home from work on Friday, and saw my computer has shut down MSN and wanted me to send an error report. Sending the report caused my computer to freeze and when I shut it down, it wouldn't restart.
It would start loading windows, then flash the blue screen for a second, and then repeat the process infinitly. And being Easter Weekend I couldn't do anything until today. I managed to make it from the start of FF10 to Zanarkand in 4 nights of playing to keep from going into computer withdrawl. But now I have to reinstall everything, my 80 gig hard drive demands a reformat when it's got 56 gigs of my stuff already on it.
Not to mention I had to drive an hour to a city that is more confusing than any plac I've ever been. The city doesn't run on a grid, it has more one way and deadend streets than 2 lane streets, some streets run right through parking lots and it has stop lights in places where there isn't even an intersection. It's got bridges twisting all around eachother and exits to nowhere and signs saying go Right, and as you're drving down the road you can see in your mirror the sign saying your destination is in the other direction. I almost hit at least 20 people who just cross the street without looking, one idiot pranced right infront of my car at a crosswalk just as the light turned green then his friends casually strolled by at a snails pace as I'm watching the green light turn yellow.
On the upside, the guy who sold me my new computer looked and sounded exactly like Robert De Niro, and the nicest sales guy I've ever met. He went to help a woman with her computer and he actually told her what she could do to fix the problem herself so he didn't have to charge her 60$ for doing something she could easily fix herself.
Okay so this dream was long and played out like a real movie. I was apparently Bruce Wayne, and I was driving to some big presentation with my girlfriend Lois, when all of a sudden this Hummer came up behind us and started smashing into the car. I hit the medium and smashed through it, I managed to jump out but my car and Lois went into the water and sank.
There was some sort of ceremony where millions of peoples turned out in support of me and my mother (who looked like Angela Patrelli from Heros). People were saying how sorry they were for our loss, and talking about my father and how things would be if he were still alive. this asian mobster looking guy came and offered to give my mother the crown jewel of his collection and she was flattered and I was playing drunk and happy when I was actually sober and suspicious. I'm watching all this as if in a theater and I'm stumbling up this long set of outdoor stairs on a building to a helopad, the celebration still going on and as the Guards look away below us on the stairs I give them a suspicious glance. When they turn around I did some Jack Sparrow flourish with my hands and got in the plane. As we're taking off in the Helicopter they are showing us the new Bat Signal which is a Three Paneled Plasma Screen that covers 3 City Blocks and shows a giant golden bat signal which projects on the sky.
The scene fades and I'm sitting in the Bat Cave. The Bat Symbol is my screen saver on my own flat panel TV screens and they're moving from screen to screen. I'm in my bat suit except with no mask and I swear I can hear Lois's voice. I start talking to the darkness saying if she's there to come out because I really need to see her. Out from the darkness come Lois who now looks like Lidia from the Beetlejuice movie. I say I don't believe it is her and she tries to kiss me and I push her away and she's stalkling around the batcave telling me all this thing we had done together. I tell her to prove she isn't a ghost and she picks up some tow nail clippers and brings them to me and pushes me back into an old recliner and gets in my lap. I keep telling her this can't be real and she tells me her new master The Bone Collector brought her back to life and wanted a fight with me. She told me that if I lost, we could be together forever. I asked if she had all her memories before and she said she knew everything about me being Batman. I asked her if she was now working for my enemy, if she had given away my secret identity and my bat cave location and she started kissing me and saying she could never betray me. She continued kissing me but I pushed her back after a minute and told her it didn't feel right because her lips were cold and not as full as they used to be now that she was some sort of animated dead. She left me there and I looked up The Bone Collector on Wikipedia and the Bone Collector is a henchman of the asian man that my mother and I had taken a Helicopter ride with. Then I woke up.
I feel like I have the body of an old man and I think I know the contraption to blame.
I was doing it the opposite way of the guy in the picture. I was face up and doing crunches like that. The exercise above strengthens the back muscles. But anyways. I was doing it in my desperate attempt to get abs to go with my new pecs (Glee) But I think I overdid it. It's either that or the 6 hours of nonstop massage I did on Saturday finally catching up to me. Seriously my hands are numb for a little bit but it's my legs and back that feel the worse after a massage marathon day.
The Massage Therapist has nobody to do Massage on him. Blaaaaah. I have to wait for mid-April before the other ones start arriving. For now I guess I'll have to settle for Pedicures from the hot estheticians. Woe is me. ... But seriously my back is fucking murdering me with pain right now.
It's a scary feeling not FEELING your own hands. I can see them moving, I can feel the movement in the muscles but I have no sensation in them at the moment. This always seem to happen right after a day where I do 6 hours of massage without a break... I call those my Marathon days. The worst part was the final lady of the day wanted the hardest pressure I could do any my hands were already 75% dead. Aaaaand now I have to go paint a room in the neighboring apartment.
I am petty sure Rayne is based off of me. Seriously.
http://www.lea
Mar 12/08 recurring Themes: NACKAWIC,GIRLS I KNOW,LONG WALKS,
My friend Travis, who just graduated from Film school in Vancouver was in my home town to do some interviewing for a documentary and I offered to help him with the interviews. We took a shortcut through my back yard to get to a different street but it was in the middle of a blizzard so the movement was hampered. Eventually we got to the street and ran across it trying to jump over the snow bank but got stuck. After finally freeing ourselves we continued down the plowed sidewalk to the house on the corner of my hard. Knocking on the door it was [crikketcandy] who answered.- She was in a bathrobe with a night cap on yawning like I had just woken her up though it was the middle fo the day. She asked if we could come back in the spring and then her dad came to the door and said they were hibernating for the winter.
Another dream I had was I had woken up at a friend fo my family's house about an hours worth of walking from my parents house. I started walking, avoiding cars that looked like they were going to pick me up to drive me like some sort of hitch hiker. Then a car does pull over and I realize it was a girl I had gone to school with who was much prettier in the dream than she is in real life. But she greeted me and said I looked like I was going to die of heat stroke so she took me back to her place, gave me some water then we talked about some stuff like school and who was where, then she gave me a cold wet towel to wrap around my head. Apparently the walk home was going to be a hot one and take longer than an hour. Then she offered me a Freezie and I took it but it had no flavor and I woke up.
**Both of these dreams dealt with cold because the temperature in my bedroom was down to 50F last night but I was snug under my 5 huge quilts so the only time I felt the cold was when I rolled over onto an exposed patch of sheet that had been out from under the blankets, or onto a part of exposed pillow. I was nice and toasty when I was safe under the blankets though
I found this hilarious stuff online.
I'm trying to write a story, but one thing I have never been able to grasp is when to use : or ; or , so I tend to use , a lot but I know I'm not supposed to use ", and". I always find every sentence has some ,s in is but I feel I should occasionally be using ; .... Damn you english class... all I learned from you was that Malvolio was a pussy.
So I spent an hour and a half in the gym, managed to drink a half gallon of water while there, and managed to lose 1 Kilogram. How does that work?
Here is why I am scared if I ever had to call the police in an Emergancy:
Step 1: Dial Police
Step 2: Listen to it ring 5 times
Step 3: hear a slow speaking recording saying "Thank you for calling the District 1 Police Station. If it is an Emergancy, please hang up and dial 9-1-1
Step 4: Hang up and dial 9-1-1
Step 5: Hear another recorded message saying "Thank you for calling 911, for service in English press 1
Step 6: Press 1 for the love of GAWD!
Step 7: Explain the situation to the operator
Step 8: Give them your name
Step 9: Give them your address
Step 10: Give them your phone number
Step 11: Get told they will call the police, the ones that you tried to call back in Step 1:
Step 12: Listen to the operator tell the police officer the situation
Step 13: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your name
Step 14: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your address
Step 15: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your phone number
Step 16: Get transfered through to police officer
Step 17: Explain the situation yet again.
Step 18: Get asked how many people are involved
Step 19: Get told that he is sending an officer over
Step 20: Get told to have a good night and end the call
So some guy (We'l call him dumbass#1) came over to get revenge on another guy (Dumbass#2) for grabbing some girl at a party. There were a bunch of microthugs and prostitots outside the apartment waiting for dumbass#2 to come by with his friends, Dumbass#2s car pulls up, a girl jumps out and starts begging with this muscleheaded dumbass#1 not to start a fight, then the #1 starts kicking the car and #2 drives away almost hitting a bunch of the crowd. the morons hang around, #1 pulls out a phone and calls the girl who had been grabbed and all the prostitots start screaming that she's a slut and a whore, then the girls go inside and the microthugs hang out with #1 for half an hour talking about past fights and how tough they are. A truck pulls up, more dumbasses get out, then some dumbasses leave in the truck, some go inside, then leave, eventually leaving just #1 as the only male remaining. Apparently he texted #2 and said he promised not to fight him, and #2 finally returned, came inside and I heard yelling then #2 came out, went to his purple car, pulled out a crowbar and walked over to #1s car, where #1 and some girls had gotten into it to drive away. #1 comes over with the crowbar and smashes the back window where a girl is sitting and I hear her screaming, them he starts smashing the front window and windshield, get in his car with some friends and drive away. At this point I'm calling the cops who show up shortly after. One of the girls involved is my neighbor (who I got evicted... hehe dumb children) and it was in that apartment where the inside stuff happened and these people are always hanging out anyways. The cop took their report and they were all to willing to name names after being assaulted. To avoid having to give a report, I just hung my head out the window and said to the cop "What they said is better than I could explain it!" He nodded and drove off. So much excitement at 1:30am.
In Conclusion: I can finally check "Calling 911 for a Legitimate Reason." off my list of things to do before I die.
This is the first job I think I've ever had where I complain about getting 4 days off and going Yay when I get to work again. But the weather is so nasty that my clients have rebooked for another time. My next paycheck is going to be a tiny one. Boooo.