an emo moment


This pain lingers on inside of me
the love i never feel, the love i need to feel
why must you tell me that i am loved when the one person i need the affection from, doesn't seem to know that i exist
I can feel the hurt eating away inside of me
tears run down my cheeks, rain storm on my face
lying here alone, dying on my own
falling apart, not feeling the love that a child should feel from it's mother...the one person who I should feel love from
I pray to God to help me get by day by day, but with no response, I can't keep the faith as strong, the more I pray the less I believe and the worse everyday gets

yeah.....hooray for me

for some reason im not patient enough to do the first entry so i always end up doing two....so i called my mom at like...2:50 and she was like "ill be home in 15minutes"...it's like 4:30 and she still isn't home......i cant stand alcoholics...they ruin their lives and the people in their lives.....it's so depressing ha...anyways, im really tired and really sick of the lies people feed me....i just want to go live with adam or bill.....those two i see all the time and seem to be the once who care most....lauren and anne care too...but i dont see them as much lol....but i dont know, those 4 seem to be my only close close friends anymore...everyone else just kind of talks to me when they feel like it...and decide that one day we're friends, the next we're not....it's dumb.....i need to get out of Pittsburgh and go somewhere like....Italy, yeah i can go to Rome!!!! amazing it would be lol

well.....im going to go get some warm clothes on, im cold...VERY cold.....fair-the-well!

bored....very bored, 2hour delay today...that was cool...other than that? bored

just got out of the shower....getting ready for a family party....yeah, going to be dumb, but lifeteen should be fun tonight the x-mas partAY!!!! so yeah, im just gonna sit here and contiplate.....talked to adam lst night for like 5minutes on the phone...that was interesting, then anne texted me and woke me up this morning...stupid dirty whore...KIDDING ANNE! so yeah hoping lauren comes tonight, i havent seen her in like ages...it's depressing ^_;...*cries* well i think im gonna go now...im kinda cold....

-britt

im writing again, this could get personal and long...so like a few years ago i dated this guy named greg, and i was convinced he was my first love....he was amazing and i was happy, he just lived kinda far away...and we kind of got in a fight because he was leading me on for a long time by telling me how he loved me and i fell for it and i wanted him back...and now he has a new gf?

"as one last favor make an exception for me. forget me. the memories will pass. out of sight out of mind."

thats what he said to me...and now i dont know what to do now....i want to talk to him still...he was one of my closest friends...and now hes just gone....i thought i was over him when i met adam....but i guess not.......i hate guys....why cant they be easier to get over???

bye kids

hmm..so today was alright, anne came over and helped me make this, i thought it was pretty cool.....so yeah, i am really bored....i dont know, i hung out wtih adam today, that was cool, but i guess im just going to go now, ill talk later
-Britt