[Just another heartache on my lips.]'s diary

363352  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-09-26
Written: (7364 days ago)

Okay, let's see. Yesturday I went to my aunt's house for a Carne Asada as some of you know. It wasn't that bad actually. My baby cousin's were there. Rachel, Natalie and cuddly two and a half week old Michael. ^-^ Along with Jerry and his sister and my cousin Anthony.I have two cousin's named Anthony, each from both sides of my family. Jerry's taller than me damnit. I remember when I was taller than him. >.< Oh yeah, and he goes to the High School that I might be transferred to next year. Cool I suppose. Oh, and I also got new manga. Descendants of Darkness:Yami no Matsuei volume one and Saiyuki volume two. I love them both! Though because I'm doing homework at the moment I'm going to stop writing. Ciao.

362341  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2004-09-25
Written: (7365 days ago)

Looks like my parents are fighting. Again. Oh well...nothing I can do. At the moment I'm trying to do some of my homework. I basically gave up on my homework assignment for my Culteral Awareness class. I'll try to do it again later. Maybe on Monday. I'll ask Jasmine, Tamera and Stacy for help. But other than that...I'm not going to do it. Though I'm doing Algebra and English homework right now. Algebra...whee...-.- Well, I found out that I probably won't be on ALL day. Carne Asada at some relative's house. An aunt of mine if I'm not mistaken. *listens to the new Eminem song*..o.O I have nothing else to say. So, bye.

362193  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2004-09-25
Written: (7365 days ago)

I'm not sure if I'll be on later today. I have to go shopping and then to my aunt's house. And...I think something might happen today. Nothing bad I think. Just bad enough to make my day suck. I don't know. Maybe I'm being paranoid again? Well...I thought I'd be home more today to work on my homework...but oh well. I have to much to do on just one day. And one involves having to interview people. Which was what I was going to do today. But eh! What can I do? Hm...I'll try working on my Algebra homework and my poem for my English class. Well, I have to go take a shower now so I'll see'ya once I get out. Unless I can't get back on. Bleh, Adios.

360718  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-09-23
Written: (7366 days ago)

*stares at all her baby pictures*...Wow! My hair was black back then! O.o And always in pigtails by the looks of it...*blushes faintly*I was such a cute baby. << >> *wonders what the hell happend*Anyways, I found another picture with my parents in it. But I'm still in it too. >.< It's a picture from my baptism...*blinks*And the cake that they had too. My dad's holding me and my mom is holding my cousin Gloria. *nods*...I guess I have to use the one with me in the red dress. *sulks*Now my class is going to see what I looked liked as a baby. >.< And I have to go passed the alley-like place again to get my lunch for tommorow...Oh, and I'm not going to San Diego on Saturday after all. Though I will be gone most of the day because I'm being forced to go shopping...Fun...-.-;;; Well, gotta go now. Ciao.

360611  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-09-23
Written: (7367 days ago)

Note To Self:Bring manga for Stacy and I to read tommorow.

Um, don't know what to put down. Hrm...at the moment I'm lingering between depression, hyperness, and okayness. Yeah, doesn't make any sense at all. I think. Well, I have tons of homework to do. One involves me having to write a poem for English. And it's due tommorow. Damnit. It has to be about my parents too. Which makes it even more difficult. I have to find a picture that has them in it. Like from back in the day. And make a poem about it, like how they were back then, how their lives changed and how they are now. I can't think of anything. Plus that picture I found for the poem has me in it. When I was about...7 months(or older). I'm wearing a red dress.*pouts*But that was the day that my parents and Gloria's parents took seperate pictures on the same day at the old house that my parents and I use to live in. I got the red dress and Gloria got the pink one. *snickers**coughs*Moving on...Tamera made me tell Alex that she likes him. But I forgot to tell him that she needed to talk to him on Monday. I'll tell him tommorow during Homeroom.If I remember. *stares at her other homework*I don't think I'll be able to finish this all today...*sighs*Bleh, I fell asleep early yesturday. I didn't want to stay awake, thinking about everything that happend that day. So i made up my mind and went to bed. Oh yeah...7 1/2-8 hours of sleep. More than what I usually get. Well, since school started anyway.*lets head fall against the desk*Evil homework...*sighs again*Better keep working on it...Well, see'ya.

359737  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2004-09-22
Written: (7367 days ago)

Bleh...ignore my last entry of utter stupidity. Having a bad day. Scratch that. I'm having a HORRIBLE day. It went from bad to worse so fast. Then again, I should've known. It always happens. Meh...I'm so pissed off and depressed right now. Don't ask me why and don't even try to help. I'll get over it. I always do. Takes a while but eh! *shrugs*My homework has tear stains on it...-.- Oh, I need to go get my lunch for tommorow...great, I have to go through that alley-like place at this time of day. Shit...it's so dark out and there's all these...men out there. Tons of them. Why me...? Seriously...why me? *sighs*Mm....school tommorow...another sleepless night...sounds really fun, no?Pfft....I'm an idiot. -.-;;;
*points down* More song lyrics....the first song has it's English translation. A rough translation but eh...*shrugs*Song crept into my head...so I decieded to put it up....well...I need to go get my lunch...passed the dark alley-like place...*shudders faintly*Oh goodie....



La Llamada by Selena
No me vuelvas a llamar,
Tratando de explicar,
Que lo que vi no era cierto.
Verguenza debes tener,
Si me quieres convencer,
Que eres fiel y eres sincero.
Oh, te vi con ella no puedes negar,
Que eran tus labios los que la besaban, Canalla!
No te sirvio de nada, el disimular,
Que solo, charlaban, no mientas mas!

Si me vuelves a llamar,
Yo te vuelvo a colgar,
Ya me canse de escuchar,
Oh escusas, y mas mentiras.
No me vuelves a llamar,
No te voy a perdonar,
Otra oportunidad,
No te la doy,
No vales la pena.

Vergüenza debes tener
Si me quieres convencer
Que eres fiel y eres sincero
Oh, te ví con ella y no puedes negar
Que eran tus labios los que la besaban
Canalla!
No te sirvió de nada
El disimular
Que sólo charlaban
No mientas más.

Si me vuelves a llamar,
Yo te vuelvo a colgar,
Ya me canse de escuchar,
Oh escusas, y mas mentiras.
No me vuelves a llamar,
No te voy a perdonar,
Otra oportunidad,
No te la doy,
No vales la pena.

te vi con ella no puedes negar,
Que eran tus labios los que la besaban, Canalla!
No te sirvio de nada, el disimular,
Que solo, charlaban, no mientas mas!

Si me vuelves a llamar,
Yo te vuelvo a colgar,
Ya me canse de escuchar,
Oh escusas, y mas mentiras.
No me vuelves a llamar,
No te voy a perdonar,
Otra oportunidad,
No te la doy,
No vales la pena.


(English Translation)
Don't call me again, trying to explain
that what I saw wasn't true
You should be ashamed of yourself
for trying to convince me
that you're faithful and sincere
I saw you with her, you can't deny
that those were your lips that were kissing her
It didn't do you any good trying to pretend
that you were only chatting,
don't lie anymore

If you call me again, I'll hang up again
I'm already tired of hearing more excuses and lies
Don't call me again, I'm not going to forgive you
Another chance, I won't give you
You're not worth it

You should be ashamed of yourself
for trying to convince me
that you're faithful and sincere
I saw you with her, you can't deny
that those were your lips that were kissing her
It didn't do you any good trying to pretend
that you were only chatting,
don't lie anymore

If you call me again, I'll hang up again
I'm already tired of hearing more excuses and lies
Don't call me again, I'm not going to forgive you
Another chance, I won't give you
You're not worth it

I saw you with her, you can't deny
that those were your lips that were kissing her
It didn't do you any good trying to pretend
that you were only chatting,
don't lie anymore

If you call me again, I'll hang up again
I'm already tired of hearing more excuses and lies
Don't call me again, I'm not going to forgive you
Another chance, I won't give you
You're not worth it
359679  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2004-09-22
Written: (7368 days ago)

Stacy and I missed our bus. XD
Eheh...that's why I came on so late....I just got out of the shower...I took a very quick shower by the way. And now I'm doing my science homework. Fun,fun. Well...I'm feeling kinda..paranoid. And more than usual. And....kinda depressed. *shrugs*Bleh. Mood-swings. Oh, and I just got back from [Mistress of Darkness]'s(Stacy's) house. Seeing as we missed our bus...we took the public bus to her house. I called my dad and my grandpa came to pick me up...um....I think there's some cheating going on in my family. Again. Heh...more cheating in my life. Nice...Heh, there's been lots of cheating going on this year. Six that I know of. Ugh, I don't feel good...I better stop typing this. I need to do my homework now so...yeah...*hums to Fool by Shakira**coughs*Song is stuck in my head...Anyways, ciao.

358436  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2004-09-21
Written: (7369 days ago)

I am so friggin' tired.
For some reason I'm feeling kinda sore. I have yet another limp in my left leg. That really hurts. And Matthew drank all of my coke. Well, what was left of it anyways. So now I have to get something else to drink.Blehness. Well, seeing as I have homework to do, I won't put much. I also need to go take a shower in a few minutes. Um, nothing new happend today. Not that I can remember anyways. Eh, I have a bad memory so who knows? *shrugs*Oh...I know there was like one or two fights today. And one was between a guy and a girl. I have no clue who won. Though many people are saying that it was the girl. Finally...violence. Oh how I remember my middle school days...so many fights and insults flying in every direction. Fun,no? Well...the weather sucked today. It was too damn hot. My head hurts...And...I really should wish Gloria a late happy birthday. I feel like a such a bitch because of it. She is now fourteen. Like moi. We're about a month and a day apart. If I haven't mentioned it or whatever, she's my cousin. From my dad's side. Yeah...I need to go for a bit. So, Adios.



I like this song...<.< >.>

Bitch by Meredith Brooks

I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
Must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that
When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool, you do what you do
And don't try to save me

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way
357513  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2004-09-20
Written: (7370 days ago)

Today...was kind of boring and kind of alright I suppose. I have homework though. For my Culteral Awareness class along with Science and English. Eh, pretty simple really. But I don't want to do the first one. Oh well, one missed assignment. Um, today's my cousin's fourteenth birthday. Yay...didn't go to the Carne Asada though. Seeing as my parents were fighting and stuff. Anyways, I guess I made another friend. His name is Alex. And this is how I found out that we were friends...

Tamera:Do you have any friends?
Alex:Yeah..o.O Alot. Heh, nah. I'm kidding. But I do have friends.
Tamera:So, are you friends with her?*points to me*
Me:*blinks*
Alex:Yeah.
Me:*blinks again*Eh?*Thinking:Why am I always the last one to find out these things?*

Um...yeah. That's how I found out. I guess he said that because we have nearly all but one class together and we are usually always sitting next to one another. And we sorta talk. Not much though. But I guess he's my friend now. Can't be rude now can I?Oh, and Tamera's friend, Beatrice, proclaimed herself my new best friend. Why? Well...because I gave her my hot cheetoes. She's kind of..crazy. But she seems cool. And I met one of Stacy's new friends. She seems cool as well. Her name is Jasmine. Pretty name. Just like Jade and Tamera. And Beatrice. Oh yeah...during English we had to do this thing called Echo Poetry or whatever, and I had to go up in front of the class. To read my poem. Which really sucked. But here's the deal, Mr. Weronka told us to write the first line of the poem we were going to make. So we did. Then he said that with every line of this poem that he read, we had to write down the first thing that came to mind and whatnot, under the first line of our poem. Which nearly everyone did. And while I was busy doodling in my notebook. I was his first victim to go up and read. I did. Quite reluctant I might add. And I read the first line of my poem, then he read the first(or was it second?) line of the poem that he had read to the class. And it went on like that. It actually came out sounding pretty good. Well, I'm going to end this entry here. You know what that means...See'ya.

356349  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-09-19
Written: (7371 days ago)

And this will be the last entry of the day...Yes, aren't you happy? Anyways the following is something that just happend...o.O;;;

Dad:*tries to set the time on the new phone*
Matthew and I:*both watch*
Dad:*Curses wildly at it*
Me: *snickers*
Dad:...-.- *hands Matthew this glass thing*
Matthew:*looks at it*
Dad:Matthew, throw it at Stephanie. Maybe you'll kill her ass.
Me:...O.O....
Matthew:*looks at it and then at me**smiles*
Me:..o.o;;;...
Dad:*takes it away from him*Heh.
Me:...That woudn't have been the first time he threw something at me...

356333  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-09-19
Written: (7371 days ago)

**Warning:Entry Was Written Due To Hyperness and Lack Of Sleep**

Amazing how a shower can ease the stress and depression away. Mm, but now I'm feeling cold again. Luckily I have my new black sweater to keep me warm. It's so pretty and cuddly and mine....*hugs self* ^-^ Better now. *blinks and huggles Eeyore plushie against her*Much better. *hums to Pretty Girl(The Way) by Sugarcult*Wuv this song...*blinks*Ugh, school tommorow. And I just rememberd that I had Algebra homework to turn in...and Culture Awareness homework too. Bet the teachers are going to get on my case by saying I could've turned it in on Monday. -.- Well fucks for them. I curse to much. And I love it. If you don't like it then that's too fuckin bad. Moving on...I bit my tongue again goddamnit! >.< Owie...*sniffles*...Oh yeah...I have the picture of all my guy friends from 8th grade stored in the computer in some file...I could put it up and say that those are my bitches! XD I mean, Adan did keep calling me a female P.I.M.P, or pimpette, during school. o.O And if I am...I need some bitches damnit. I also have a lot of my female friends from school...I wonder...*snickers*Oh god...I'm hyper. Either that, or just insane. Could be both. You never know. And I wish Jade would stop asking me if I find any of the guys at my school cute or if I'm interested in any of them. The answer is NO. Most of them are sex crazed morons who I'll only get to know as friends if I feel like it. Anyways, are looks really that imorptant? I've told many people that when I'm with someone and whatnot, they'll be the hottest person in this whole fuckin planet in my mind. *nods*And I wouldn't care what anyone else has to say. Unless they want me to hurt them for being so damn annoying...Oooh! Los Lonely Boys! I lurve them! *listens to Dime Mi Amor*Whee...I love this song. I want the CD. Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah...the whole relationship thing right? Yes, looks don't matter. Though Jennifer did ask me some questions about how the perfect guy would look like. For me anyways. Um...I don't know really. It doesn't matter. But I like black hair. *nods* And brown or hazel eyes. Maybe green to, but I like the eyes any shade of brown or hazel. Teddy bear! *coughs*Anyways, because I'm so damn pale...he should be a bit pale too. And I like 'em slim or plump. But it doesn't matter. I love personality the best. Okay Jen, you can leave me alone with that now. I bet I have a lot of mistakes in this damn entry. I'm to tired to fix it. And I'm to tired to continue with this so I'll see'ya.

356151  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-09-19
Written: (7371 days ago)

My parents suck. All their yelling and cursing has left me tramatized. I get all nervous and such whenever they start fighting. I can't help it. It just terrifies me. They've fought since the day I was born. And even before that too. I've seen them fight. And I've also seen some violence here and there as well. Must be why I hate getting yelled at. I start feeling tense, scared, anxious, angry, and depressed when I'm yelled at. Which happens alot mind you. I don't care if they're yelling at me in real life or here on ET. I still feel like that. And I hate it. I feel like some stupid and scared little kid. And only reason I'm even writing this is because, that's right, my parents are fighting again. Meh, why can't they stop fighting for at least ONE FUCKIN DAY?! *shakes head and sighs*Whatever. Doesn't matter. More bullshit in my life. Gotta learn to ignore it and keep my thoughts set on the future. That's important,right? Eh, I don't know...but I also need to stop looking back at the past. Or I'll get all depressed and shit. *pouts*Ah, fuck it. I know I have people who care about me. Might not be alot but as long as I have them, I can forget about all the crap that's happend or will happen....

355505  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2004-09-18
Written: (7372 days ago)

I swear...if they yell any louder I'm going to become deaf. And who the hell does my grandfather think he is? He can't boss me around after what he did. Cheating bastard!!God, can't they just shut the fuck up already?!?! I am not a sorry excuse for a human being! I've seen worse!Ugh...I just bit my tongue. Ow...*blinks*Once again, someone else thought I was fifteen or older. Sorry,hun. But I'm fourteen. Oh, and I just rememberd that I still have that $20 gift care for Waldenbooks that Stacy gave me for my birthday. Hopefully next time I go to the mall I'll be able to get me some new books. I seriously need new reading material. *yawns*...*blinks*Holy shit! Gloria's turning fourteen in two days! I forgot! That means I might not be on the day she has that Carne Asada for her birthday. Which might be tommorow. Why must we be related?! >.< Oh well, at least she's cool. Sorta. Then again, I get along much better with my cousins from my dad's side. All of whom love basketball and violent video games. And perverted jokes. Oh wait, that's only Gloria, Jesus and Anthony. Though Anthony whines to much for an eleven year old. Moving on...Um, like two days ago this guy called Jo Jo that comes on this radio station asked the listeners what was the biggest thing they have ever swallowed...and this guy called in and said a five inch banana...*snickers*That sounded wrong. *stares at her half-eaten banana*...I'm not hungry anymore... *blinks*I'll stop now. Buh bye.

355318  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2004-09-18
Written: (7372 days ago)

Okies, because I wasn't on for long yesturday I'll write about what happend when I went to the doctor. Um..not much to say really. Just the usual. Got a bitchy doctor, ended up feeling violated and got medicine. Yup. That's it. Oh, and my mom got us lost like...three times. What a day. Anyways, right now I am pretty pissed off. Thanks to my family. My brother and sister are such a pain in the ass. They are always fighting. Everyone is always yelling and giving me a fuckin headache. And last night my grandmother(from my mom's side) keeps calling me "rockera." And because my mom's side LOVES gossip, the fact that I'm a "rocker" now is going to be known throughout that side of the family. Yay...*blinks*Think I'll scare them on Christmas. My dad doesn't care about what I wear as long as it isn't slutty. Soooo...if my parents get us new clothes to wear for Christmas this year...I know what I want. ^-^.*coughs*.. I'm bored now, so I'll stop with this. Ciao.


Pretty Girl(The Way) by Sugarcult

Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out what his intentions were about
That's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

She's beautiful as usual with bruises on her ego and
Her killer instinct tells her to beware of evil men
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
Love

Pretty girl, pretty girl

Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you cry
It's the way
That he in your mind
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
Love

353892  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-09-16
Written: (7374 days ago)

Guess what? I have yet another "friend" who doesn't give a fuck about me. Damn, I have alot of those. And even when I know that they could care less about what happens to me...I still care about them. Does that mean that I'm weak or something? I don't know...All I know is that I don't want this to bring me down. Kind of hard though. I just don't want to be depressed. I hate being depressed. It fuckin sucks. And I know it sucks for those who do care. Goddamnit. Ugh...my head is killing me...I'll stop ranting now....

If I should Die by RPM

I breathe in
I breathe out
You’re my life
You’re my death
You’re all I have left

I cry soft
I cry loud
You’re my touch
You’re my sound
You are my air now

If only I could crawl out of my skin
Do you think that you, that you
Could breathe me in?

IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I leave to you
My soul to take
Let me not wake you up
Or disturb your sleep
I leave to you
My soul to keep
IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I pray that your
Heart won’t break
But I won’t wake you up
Won’t disturb your sleep
I leave to you my soul to keep

I bleed deep
I bleed dry
You’re the sun
You’re the sky
You are my god now

I run fast
I fall down
You’re the wind
You’re the ground
You are my earth now

If only I could crawl out of my skin
Do you think that you, that you
Could breathe me in?

IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I leave to you
My soul to take
Let me not wake you up
Or disturb your sleep
I leave to you
My soul to keep
IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I pray that your
Heart won’t break
But I won’t wake you up
Won’t disturb your sleep
I leave to you my soul to keep

If I die please don’t cry
Breathe me in and let me live again
If I die please don’t cry
Hold my spirit in your hand
‘Cause the walls are closing in
So I pray that you are listening

IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I leave to you
My soul to take
Let me not wake you up
Or disturb your sleep
I leave to you
My soul to keep
IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I pray that your
Heart won’t break
But I won’t wake you up
Won’t disturb your sleep
I leave to you my soul to keep

IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I leave to you
My soul to take
Let me not wake you up
Or disturb your sleep
I leave to you
My soul to keep
IF I SHOULD DIE
Before I wake
I pray that your
Heart won’t break
But I won’t wake you up
Won’t disturb your sleep
I leave to you my soul to keep

353826  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-09-16
Written: (7374 days ago)

My head hurts.Alot. It's hurting in the same place where I hit myself yesturday. It won't go away. And my sister woke me up from my nap. *sulks*Only reason I'm even on and awake.Well, I go to the doctor tommorow. Yayness...Ugh, Matthew's being such a crybaby today. Damn siblings...all their noise is making the pounding in my head even more painful. *cuddles plushie*I need sleep..and something to drink. Hrm....today's Mexican Independence Day and whatnot right? Can't remember...haven't been watching tv or anything...and I don't pay much attention when people talk to me at times so I don't know...If it is...WOO! PARTY! Sadly, I am in no condition to have fun. Though I am in a condition to take a nap or fall asleep next to someone by accident. I can't go back to sleep. Too hard now. >.< Soooo...I'm going to distract myself. Somehow. @.@ Buh bye now. Oh, and sorry for any mistakes and stuff. -.-;;;

353110  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2004-09-15
Written: (7374 days ago)

Leaving in a few minutes...and I'm bored so I'm going to add one more diary entry for the day. Um, my head is fuckin killing me. And not because I have a headache. But because being the clutz that I am, I tripped and slammed my head against the wall. And basically almost killed/knocked myself out. My head was pounding quite painfully. It felt like I was bleeding. Thankfully it was a false alarm. Well to those who don't want me gone anyways. The people that I wuv. But for those of you want me dead...HA! I'm alive! It might be a while until you get rid of me but I'll still be here! Making your life miserable just like you have made mine! *smirks evilly*Beware you sadistic bastards!...*blinks*Huh...I think that hit on the head did something to me. I swear...one of these days I'm going to end up giving myself brain damage. Or killing myself. Whichever comes first.

o.O Um...the pain in my head won't go away so I should go...but I'll leave you with one of my new favorite songs...sadly, it's a bit depressing. I was going to put this new romantic song that I heard on the radio. But there aren't any lyrics for it yet. It's called Baby It's You by Jojo Feat. Bow Wow...I think. Well, I'm starting to like Seven Wiser, so I'll put one of their song's instead. And I'm sure some people know who this song is dedicated too....Yes, dedicated. It's also a dedication...o.O;;; Hm, I'll put another song after that one. Except the next one will be in Spanish. Don't understand what it says..then to bad...*sighs dreamily*It's so romantic...

Lies by Seven Wiser

I'm the one that was there for you
When you cut yourself and started to bleed
And I'm the one that you counted on for all the favors you asked of me
I'm the one that would dry your tears
Every time you'd come crying to me
But ever since the day you blew me off
Everything you say

Is a lie, everything is a lie
Don't you lie to me

Sick of the games that you played on me
So I walk alone and suffer in need
And I'm the one that I counted on for all the favors that I ask of me
You're the one that will cry the tears
When you see what you've created of me
But ever since the day you blew me off
Everything you say

Is a lie, everything is a lie
Don't you lie to me



Cuidarte El Alma by Chayanne

Sólo si pudiera estar contigo,
Tú dormida entre mis brazos
Y mirarte en el silencio
Sólo pudiera dibujarte una escena de mis sueños
Donde siempre estás presente

Con sólo tenerte aquí
Decirte lo que yó siento

Es que me gusta tu cara, me gusta tu pelo
Soñar con tu voz
cuando díces que te quiero
Me gusta abrazarte,
Perderme en tu aroma

Poder encontrar en tus ojos el cielo
Me gusta tu risa, me gusta tu boca
Me gusta creer que por mí tú estás loca
Cómo quiero que sientas conmigo la calma
Y cuando llegue la noche, cuidarte el alma

Como despertar en la distancia
Sin tu piel junto a la mía
Amando tu fotografía
Podemos mandar besos con el viento,
Mirar la luna al mismo tiempo

Contar un día más

Con sólo tenerte aquí....
No sabes lo que me faltas...

Es que me gusta tu cara, me gusta tu pelo
Soñar con tu voz
cuando dices te quiero
Me gusta abrazarte, perderme en tu aroma

Poder encontrar en tus ojos el cielo
Me gusta tu risa, me gusta tu boca
Me gusta creer que por mí, tú estás loca
Como quiero que sientas conmigo la calma
Y cuando llegue la noche, cuidarte el alma

Y pesar de todo
Y sin darnos cuenta
Estaré en tu puerta diciéndote otra vez

Es que me gusta tu cara, me gusta tu pelo
Soñar con tu voz
cuando dices te quiero
Me gusta abrazarte, perderme en tu aroma

Poder encontrar en tus ojos el cielo
Me gusta tu risa, me gusrta tu boca
Me gusta creer que por mí tú estás loca
Como quiero que sientas conmigo la calma
Y cuando llegue la noche, cuidarte el alma.

352994  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2004-09-15
Written: (7375 days ago)
Next in thread: 353650

I'm back! Very tired and sore but I'm back. Um...I'm a bit happy because I don't have school tommorow. Woo! Hrm...I also don't go to school Friday. Gotta go to the doctor and stuff...Oh! I made another new friend! Her name is Tamera. Pronouced Tam-ra. She's really cool. We have nearly the same views on different topics. Plus she's taller than me. She's 5'9....but I think I grew an inch. Which sucks. I hate being so tall. But oh well...um, Westchester has alot of perverts and really immature people. Oh, and whores as well. Male and female. And I don't know what else to write anymore...very short entry,no? Well...Bye I suppose.

352126  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2004-09-14
Written: (7375 days ago)

Whee! I'm bored again! Soooo...umm..what was I gonna say? I can't remember. Um...guess I'll put random quotes from school and such...o.O

*Bus Ride Home*
Stacy:Know what's stupid?
Me:Besides you?
Stacy:-.-....
Me:*snickers*
Stacy:With friends like that who needs enemies?

*September 13, 2004...third period*
Jade:So what are you?
Me:Mexican.
Jade:Ah,cool. You look Mexican.
Me:*thinking:I like her already...*Really?Thank god.
Jade:I'm Mexican too. Do I look Mexican?
Me:*nods*Yeah. You are like the first person to say that...everyone else says I look white. -.-
Stacy:It's because your pale!
Me:Shut up. >.<
Jade:^.^;;;


*6th Period, today*
Mr. Patterson:Alright, for your homework I want you all to bring an artifact to class. And I want you to come up front and tell the class what culture it's from and what it is.
Everyone:*blank looks on their faces*Huh?
Mr.Patterson:Now, it doesn't have to be an actual artifact. It can be anything. Money, clothes, and such. But you must be able to persuade the class into believing that it is something from another culture.
Reggie(some guy that sits next to me): Artifact? Can I bring a tamale?
Everyone except me:*laughs*
Me:*muffles a yawn*
Mr. Patterson:No. You can't bring food. I don't want no fried rice and shrimp as your artifact.
Everyone:*laughs again*
Me:...o.o...*thinking:Haha...?*
Mr. Patterson:It must be from another country. Nothing from the U.S. Like Canada or Mexico.
Me:Ooooh! I can bring my grandma? *says this low enough for no one to hear*

*After School. Heading to the bus*
Me:*tells Stacy about the assignment for my 6th period*
Stacy:*laughs*XD
Me:*giggles slightly*
Stacy:*hands me some chips*
Me:Thanks...*only gets a few while she keeps on eating*
-this goes on for a few minutes-
Me:Um,Stacy?
Stacy:What?
Me:Don't we have a bus to catch?
Stacy:Yeah...? O.o
Me:And isn't are bus the first to leave...?
Stacy:O.O...*nods*
Me:Aren't we...kind of far from the bus?
Stacy:Oh shit!
Me:They're gonna leave us behind! O.O;;;
Both:*takes off running*
Stacy:C'mon! >.<
Me:These stupid backpacks are keeping us from running faster! >.< *pants and tries not to laugh at our situation*
Stacy:If it wasn't for your slow ass we would have been there already!
Me:*twitch*Well your the one fuckin eating and walking too damn slow!
Stacy:I was hungry!

And that's all that I have for now so yeah...buh bye. O.o;;;

352039  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2004-09-14
Written: (7376 days ago)

I'm keeping a journal! Whee...-.- I'm just so bored during my classes that I need to do something. Espicially if I'm in a bad mood and shit. And writing usually helps. So, I'm probably going to rant a bit in the notebook and whatnot. Or doodle. Doesn't matter as long as I'm doing something that won't cause me to fall asleep in class. So far so good. I got the idea from my English teacher. Who I think, KICKS ASS. He's so damn funny. Though I still get sleepy in his class. Same with riding the bus. And speaking about the goddamn bus...that bus driver lady was a BITCH today. She wouldn't take off until everyone in the damn bus got quiet and settled down. Yeah, like that's going to happen any time sooner. But who could blame her? Half the kids on the bus are loud and annoying idiots. Well, Stacy and I sorta got on the bus a bit late. Not as late as a few other people though. But late enough to be forced to sit with some other people, and not with each other. We both had to sit with guys that we didn't know. And the guy next to me fell asleep! >.< Thank god he didn't fall asleep on me. Ugh, I hate sitting next to guys that I don't know. I mean, if they're my friend and stuff then I wouldn't mind to much. As long as he didn't fall asleep next to me. I hate it when they do that. Bleh, enough of that. Um...I have Algebra homework. Yay...though it's due on Friday because I don't have Algebra tommorow. I had 2nd, 4th, and 6th period today. And I had 1st, 3rd, and 5th yesturday. A bit confusing but I'll get use to it. I also have homework for my Culture Awareness class. Also due on Friday. But I'm not going to school on Friday because I have to go to the doctor. And I don't have school on Thursday. Finally! A day to get proper sleep. But I get four days. Woo! But it's fucked up that I have to leave Stacy to ride the bus alone with all those idiots. But she'll probably make a friend or something. Oh, and we hung out with Jade again today. And Jose got to meet her. So now we'll probably sit together during lunch and so on and so forth. Hm...she know's that I have a boyfriend. *nods*I told her. I only told her because she had asked me if I had seen or met any guys that I might like and I told her no. Then she asked not even one, to which I responded "I have a boyfriend." and you get the picture. That was before she read my palm. Anyways, I got my locker today. Seeing as my backpack is already getting super heavy. And I have no idea what else to write so I'll end it here. Adios. (And sorry for any bad spelling and grammer...my writing and typing skills suck at the moment)
                

351181  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2004-09-13
Written: (7377 days ago)
Next in thread: 351237

I've so bored that I've decieded to write part of the conversation that I had with Jade...I can't remember all of it so some of the things will be a bit different. Damn my bad memory...

Jade:*talking to me and Stacy*So you guys don't,um...*makes drinking/smoking gesture*
Me:No.
Stacy:*shakes head*No.
Me:Some people that I know make fun of me because I have never taken a sip of alcohol in my entire life...-.- Same with weed. *thinking*They must want me to end up even more stupid...o.O
Jade:Ah. You two don't...cut yourselves right? Let me see your wrist.
Me:*blinks and holds up my hand**pulls bracelets and watch down*
Jade:*looks at my wrist*Good,good. *does the same to Stacy*
Me:*blinks again*Eheh..
Jade:Hey! Can I read your hand? *grabs my hand*
Me:Um..okay? ^-^;;;
Jade:Hm...*stares at it*Huh...are you in love?
Me:*Blinks*Um...*manages not to blush*Yes.
Jade:Yeah....I could easily tell.Hmm...well it says that your very loveable.
Me:Eh...?
Jade:I mean, loving. Your very loving. Sorry about that.
Me:Um, it's okay.
Jade:*tells me that I'm going to have a very successful life and that it looks like I've had people come and go in my life*
Me:o.o;;;*nods the whole time*
Jade:Has anything bad ever happend to you in the past?
Me:Eh...yeah.
Jade:Ah..(She told me some other things but I can't remember...something about two loves...? Or was that Stacy? I can't remember. Probably both of us. Also said something about one of them not working out or something like that)

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