Can't wait for the dull love to cease.
The pain is slowly leaving...
But it's still here.
But now I talk more, and I'm away from home longer.
Away from him and thoughts of him.
Only thoughts I have are of friends, family, and school.
And maybe once in a while, him.
Always painful...
Or always causing me anger.
Either way, I'm moving on.
No matter how much it hurts.
I feel more freedom now that I don't have love.
But I know I'll manage...

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥___xoxo

Narrowed it down:

Speech-Language Pathologist
Epidemiologist
Psychologist
Director of Photography
Website Designer
Anthropologist
Archivist


Classes that I should take for Speech-Language Pathologist. <3
Grade 11
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Law & Government
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development


Grade 12
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Economics
Psychology
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development

http://www.careercruising.com/Careers/JobDetails.aspx?LoginID=BA1B6AB4-F569-44AE-B34F-A89135AAD8E6&OccNumber=400&MM=1&amp;field=WorkCond

Had to take some test for my fourth block class...thing. Anyways, these are the careers and jobs that I "might" be interested in. XD


1. Epidemiologist
 
2.
Website Designer
 
3.
Naturopath
 
4.
Translator
 
5.
Technical Writer
 
6.
Writer
 
7.
Market Research Analyst
 
8.
Director of Photography
 
9.
Political Aide
 
10.
Criminologist
 
11.
Audiologist
 
12.
Management Consultant
 
13.
Biologist
 
14.
Researcher
 
15.
Physical Therapist
 
16.
Webmaster
 
17.
Occupational Therapist
 
18.
Critic
 
19.
Economist
 
20.
Physician Assistant
 
21.
Humanitarian Aid Worker
 
22.
Anthropologist
 
23.
Art / Music Therapist
 
24.
Industrial-Organizational Psychologist
 
25.
Historian
 
26.
Multimedia Developer
 
27.
Psychologist
 
28.
Zoologist
 
29.
Environmental Consultant
 
30.
Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator
 
31.
Artist
 
32.
Statistician
 
33.
Archivist
 
34.
Animator
 
35.
Graphic Designer
 
36.
Speech-Language Pathologist
 
37.
Special Effects Technician
 
38.
Illustrator
 
39.
Industrial Engineering Tech
 
40.
Physical Therapy Assistant

Typical.
Another bad day.
I'm sitting here crying and I can't stop.
It started out so fucking good and then it went back to hell.
And there was a lot of fucking stupid ass hell love songs on the radio.
FUCK IT.
I'm in no mood for fucking shit that those songs talk about.
And I'm also in no fucking mood for being at home...
Or doing school work.
I fucking swear.
I'm tired of my parents fighting.
The whole, wonderful day...
FUCKING RUINED.
I feel so fucking EMO.
I called Kisa...
But her mom said she was already asleep.
Huh. Oh well. I need to stop crying and get back to my essay.
Meh. Whatever.
Bye.

...Once again in fourth block. XD Extremely bored and listening to Panic! At the Disco. Among other things. Such as the songs by Adam and Andrew. :3 I <3 them. XD

Anyways! Onto my day.

In fourth block again.>> << Which means another diary entry. XD Unless the computers get blocked again thanks to the idiot next to me playing his music to fucking loud.-.- Like now. FUHHHH!>.<*twitches*Save me.;-;

Block One:
Had TWO tests today.@.@ Think I got a B on both.XD My grades are going down again. Crud. Anyways, I have homework to work on this weekend.@.@
Autobiographical Narrative:
Requirements: Double-spaced
*1 to 2 pages in length.
*Sentence variety.
*Use of appositions (2)
*Responds to promt
*Use of imagery (3)
Tone:Authors choice.
DictionSupport tone.
Figerative Language: to support tone.
Prompt: Why are you successful while other students are floundering? Select one specific event in your life which, in retrospect, can be seen as the springboard to your success.

So, yeah. That was basically it. That, and Mr. Vorwald telling us how he was a very strange kid.XD ...He really was.O.o

Block Two:
Test for this class too.-.- It would have been the same amount as the ones I had for first block, but the copies for the second test were messed up, so we were saved. I think it's about Nicaragua. God, I hope so. I already know half of the facts. Anyways, we had a test, turning in all our homework, and other stuff. Did some class work and listened to a lecture. Plus, we have homework.

Tarea: Definiciones; elementos de literatura pg. 13 y 14.

Basically around twenty words. More or less.

Lunch:
Nothing much happened. o.o Ate with Stacy. Talked. And that was basically it.

Block Three:
We had a guest speaker today. About the AP Exam we have to take in May. God, four freakin' hours in the library.>.< I don't know if I'll survive. o.o Mentally, that is.>> <<
Well, once again, had ANOTHER test. For this class. Managed to ace it though. :3 Yayness. But, we have homework too.-.-
Continue reading and finish chapter.
Quiz on Tuesday.
Do all maps and answer questions.
Finish SOAPs.
And yeah, that's it.>> << Got a new book from the library! :3 Two, anyways. Some version of Dracula and this book called Amy and Isabelle by Elizabeth Strout. Awesome. Mucho.

Block Four:
I'll break down. Bell is about to ring.
Getting annoyed by the dumb fuck next to me.
Had a test.
Bored.
Finished typing course yesterday.
Looking for sites that aren't blocked.
Have to go turn in work.
The end. o.o

....Wondering if I should walk or take the bus.XD Think I'll take the bus. Well, I'm off. :3 LOVE YOU! ...People. <3

Bored in computer class again. Finished some dull typing program before everyone. Gawd. Some of this people haven't been able to go higher than level two since yesterday. Jesus Christo.*sighs*Dios mio, esta gente.

Anyways! :3 Onto my day. Or whatever parts I can remember, that is.

Block one:
Gawd, I knew I shouldn't read in that class.-.- I sit right in FRONT of the damn teacher, so I can't do much because of that. He scares me. Hell, he scares alot of us. We don't want to ask him questions.XD
Anyways. Reviewed some terms and such. And then we played a game using the terms! My side of the room won, of course. :3 Five to one.XD Other than that, test tomorrow.@.@

Block two:
Boring.
As usual. Went over the homework. Read a bit. And that was it. Pero, tengo que escribe unos resumenes.*sighs*I did two, I just need...dos mas.@.@
Other than that, I think I have a good grade in that class. So far, anyways. Don't know if we have a quiz tomorrow. Maybe we do. I pray to god we don't.>.<

Lunch:
GSA meeting! <3
And in case you didn't know, it means Gay Straight Alliance. Voted for president and all that crud. And we had skittles, lemonade, and chips! I only had Pink Lemonade. I didn't eat today.-.- Oh well. I'm fine for now. :3 Anyways, meeting was fun. More new members. New straight people too.XD Though, I found out that one of Adriana's ex-boyfriends is bi and his mom found out when she walked in on him making out with his ex-boyfriend.O.o ...Adriana had heard rumors that he only went out with her to prove to people that he wasn't gay.*shakes head*Typical, Americonized, telenovela. @.@ ...Which I used to watch when I was little. Much better than English soap operas.-.- Anyways! Moving on. <3

Third block:
I barely passed the test we took yesterday with a B-. @.@ I swear, my grade might go down in that class.>.< I don't want that. I'm starting to feel ashamed if I get a C in anything. Test or permament grade. Hell, I feel ashamed if I get a B nowadays.-.- Oh well. Anyways! We had a half hour, deep, class discussion.XD Fun, fun. I participated.>> << Mucho philosophical. ^.^ Somewhere along the lines this happened... o.o

Ms. Ortiz: *says something about how these concepts applied to only man*
Stephany: So does that mean women were considered awesome? ^.^
Ms. Ortiz: They weren't even considered into their discussions of humanity and their actions.^.^;;;
Stephany, among other people: *grumbles about how thier mothers gave them life and carried them around for nine months*
Matthew:...BUT YOU ATE THE APPLE!
Me:*thinking:Said from the overly proud Christian. Go figure. o.o*

...So, yeah. Other than that, I have a quiz for this class tomorrow, as well. ^.^;;;

Block four:
...Finished my homework. And all that other class. Extremely bored right now. As you can see. XD *points down*Boredom in fourth block made me do it. o.o

If I was a country I'd be: Mexico. The history and my family coming from there is so...awesome.
If I was a bad habit I'd be: Biting of teh lips. o.o My own that is.
If I was an ice cream flavor I'd be: Rainbow Sherbert. :3
If I was a disease I'd be: ...Malaria.>> <<
If I was a feeling I'd be: Confusion.
If I was a war I'd be: French Revolution
If I was a city I'd be: San Diego
If I was a color I'd be: Some shade of blue.
If I was a movie I'd be: Mulan. >> <<
If I was a currency I'd be: Pesos
If I were a month, I'd be: August
If I were a day of the week, I'd be: Friday
If I were a time of day, I'd be: Sunset. <3
If I were a planet, I'd be: Jupiter
If I were a sea animal, I'd be: Harp Seal
If I were a direction, I'd be: West
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: ...No idea. o.o A love seat? XD
If I were a sin, I'd be: Lust.
If I were a liquid, I'd be: Water
If I were a tree, I'd be: Willow Tree
If I were a bird, I'd be: Hummingbird
If I were a tool, I'd be: Hammer
If I were a flower/plant, I'd be: Sunflower
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: Rainy/cloudy weather
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be: Electric Guitar
If I were an animal, I'd be: Some wild feline. Rawr. :3
If I were a vegetable, I'd be: Carrot
If I were a sound, I'd be: Raindrops.
If I were an element, I'd be: Water
If I were a song, I'd be: Stupid Girls by Pink
If I were a food, I'd be: Rice. o.o
If I were a material, I'd be: Satin
If I were a taste, I'd be: Somewhat spicy.
If I were a word, I'd be: Awesome. o.o
If I were a body part, I'd be: The eyes...for romantic reasons. o.o
If I were a facial expression, I'd be: Spaced out.
If I were a shape, I'd be a: Circle. >> <<
If I were a number, I'd be: ...69?XD Nah, 21.^-^
If I were a band, I'd be: I have too many to pick from. o.o Uhm, Rise Against. <-- I suppose.

In fourth block again. I don't even want to go home today. Which is why I'm walking home. If I am on, I'll be working on homework. Tons of it, if I'm not too tired. School was pretty good. Which is why I don't want to go home to more crud like yesterday.-.- Most of which I didn't do anything. But that is nor here or there...And I'm starting to sound like Ms. Ortiz with that. XD

Well, onto my day! :3

Block one:
Ohmygawd. Today it was so damn hilarious. XD We were going over setence structures and whatnot, and we ended up working on a game using what we had learned the day before. The first sentense is the beginning of a "story." Which is what we originally started with. The first and last sentences are our own. Everything in between is written by the people on our role. And here's what came from mine:

Simple: She had a strange dream.
Compound: She had a strange dream, and it was about a crazy, rolling dinosaur.
Complex: Although she was asleep, she thought the crazy dinosaur was going to eat her.
Compound/Complex: Although she ran from the dinosaur, he still caught up to her and he held her in his hand.
Simple: The dinosaur loved her.
Compound: The dinosaur loved her, but the girl was in love with a stripper.
Complex: She told this to the dinosaur, and then realized she was having a strange dream.

...I swear. Mr. Vorwald is afraid of us now. He finally knows what the hell is going on through our minds. XD But we're too adorable for him to hate or fear us. *bats her eyelashes innocently*...well, maybe not adorable. More like a bunch of...honors/AP students with twisted minds.

Block two:
Spanish...ay. I got a high score on Wednesday's test. More or less, anyway. If it wasn't for me wanting to show that I could pass it, I would have pretended I was stupid.-.- With Spanish, anyway.>> << Had another test today.XD Eh, think I failed it. Or got something lower than a B.-.- Crud. And I'm not allowed to change classes.;-; *sobs*I already got a notice. It was a big, overweight, bold, NO. *ripped up the paper*>> << I wasn't the only one that did that, though. XD

Lunch:
Not much happened. Had to pay for my lunch, which is another reason as to why I'm walking home.^.^;;; But! Stacy showed me this...X3

I will find you. I will take you to bed and have my way with you. You will moan and groan and beg me to stop. I'll exhaust you and leave you weak for days.
          Sincerely,
             The Flu.

I swear, it sounded so wrong until she said the end of it. XD But, yeah, only thing that happened at lunch.>> <<

Block three:
We didn't have a quiz!
And Bird still doesn't want me to stress over the notes. So she's basically going to finish them up. I'll offer to help again today. If I can. But, I do have other things to do for this class; a DBQ and three time traveler journal entries. Plus a quiz on Monday. Other than that, Stacy left early for a soccer game and I read for the rest of the period...and talked with Diane. Basically her telling me about her crazy, Texan, AP Spanish teacher who tends to yell and storm out of the room.XD But, yeah.>> <<

Block four:
Ay, dios mio...help me.;-;
I'm stuck in class with some fucktard trying to hit up on the girl next to him. And the ghetto dimwit is sitting next to me.>.< GAWD! *sulks*Other than that, I finished my work yesterday. And quickly wrote a random paragraph that's due Monday, as well. Which means I can either be here or reading. So I'm doing both. ^-^

Eh, I'm off. Have homework for Spanish, English, and History. I finished homework for computers, so I don't have to worry about that. Hopefully I get everything done this weekend. Most of all the work I have revolves around essays. -.- Oh well. Adios, mis queridos. Grumpy old man. And my non-lesbian lover. <3

Wish I could bang my head against the desk without risking self injury.-.- Fuck. Mom and dad are fighting again. I'm not sure if Bird can handle doing all those notes, even though I could have done them on my own, so the quiz better not be tomorrow. Top that all off with other crud, and you have a cranky Stephy.-.- Taking a sleeping pill tonight. Fuck the tv and studying for Spanish. I need to sleep this off.>.<

I'm as straight as a rainbow!
Ohmygawd. First GSA meeting today. So fucking awesome. X3 Mostly everyone there is bi, gay, or lesbian. And only three people are straight. Some guy, Stacy, and this other girl. Fun, fun. :3 In computers again. Fuuuuh. <-- As Bird likes to say. Online, anyway. Bell rang, time for class to start. I'll finish this at home. If I have time. I have tons of homework. @.@

...Okay. Finished my work. I'll have time to do this now.

First block: Honors English
First block. Ohmygawd. Talked about Antigone and the work and such and it was so hilarious. Even though he's strict, he is really amusing. Have an essay due tomorrow. And a paragraph. So I'll be online. But typing the essay. All I did yesterday was type in the title. XD Helplessness. Thankfully, all I have to do is check grammer and punctuation. X3 Looking at the packet he gave us. The one with all the rules and such. Here is our "units of study:"

Ancient Greece and Rome- Antigone or Oedipus, group presentation, expository essay.
The Englightenment and the French Revolution- A Tale of Two Cities; research paper with bibliography, the debate.
The Romanitc Period- Poetry, individual presentation, Wuthering Heights, literary analysis essay.
WWI and WWII- Julius Caesaranalysis essay and individual presentations.

Along with other stuff. So, yeah. Have work to do once I get home.

Block two: Spanish 1
Eh, I think I might end up staying there. Don't know. I got a text book, just in case I did. Even though we're going to have many presentations. Oh well. I have Stacy to help me. Somewhat. Have a presentation next Friday. I'll start working on it tomorrow. When I have time. It's a group project, so I can't leave 'em alone. Sadly.

Lunch:
Basically the GSA meeting. X3

Block three:
Went over homework. Watched a movie on Japan. Quiz tomorrow. Journal entries due on Monday. That was about it.@.@

Block four:
Boring, really. Finished work early and came online. XD Basically it. Test tomorrow, I think. Along with history and Spanish tests too.@.@ Ay...

Well, bell is about to ring. Adios, mis queridos. <3

I got a monkey from Stacy! :3
So freakin' cute. Gonna take a picture of it soon. And put it on my page. She got it from Vegas. I carried it around with me all day during school. XD


English! Seems slightly better now. But it's still too early to tell. Mr. Vorwald is kind of funny. Strict, but funny. Ended up having to do an essay in twenty five minutes or less on Siligman's expirement and dropout rates in LAUSD. A comparison, really. I finished it in twenty minutes. ON my last essay, which I only had twenty minutes to write while the class had much longer, I got a 23 out of 25 on it. ^-^ Not bad. Other than that, we have to type our finished essays and turn them in on Friday.

Spanish...oh dear god, I still want to leave. We have a presentation due next Friday and I don't know what to do. Oh, crud. I have homework for that class too. Jesus Christ.-.- I really just want to leave already. I already asked my dad that if I don't get called in to change my classes, that if he could request it.-.-

Lunch time. Youth Action meeting. <3
Social on the 20th at two o'clock. So I'll be gone that day. Most likely. <3 GSA meeting tomorrow. ^.^

Third. Was history. Not much went on. Reviewed and Stacy left early for a soccer game.

Fourth block was a dull. Have homework but I only need two more questions. And it's due on Friday. Need to remember to get a floppy disk. Crud. Ah well. Was online for a while. Bored, though. Couldn't do much on a school comp.

Well, I'm pretty exhausted right now. So I'm off. Adios. <3

In fourth block right now. XD Which is computers, by the way. Supposed to be doing work, but eh. I'm half way done. ^.^ I'll write more once I get home. Time for music. XD

*giggles*I saw the Jungle Book last night. And now I have A Whole New World from Aladdin stuck in my head. XD So, I ended up putting that song on my Myspace page. :3 I don't think they had the Peabo Bryson one, so I had to put the one from the movie. Either way, I still love it. >> <<

Sing it with me, Kisa! X3 *giggles*

...Dude. I think I'm going to have a hear attack. o.o Helen and Fredirico are boyfriend and girlfriend!O.O Dude, the things I missed from not attending WHS anymore.>.< *sighs*Ah well. I'll ask her about that later.>> <<

Anyways, don't feel like making too long of an entry. So, yeah. Today was so-so. Got bothered by a bunch of idiot bastards and the like. Oh well. It happens.XD

Had a book club meeting today. Fun, fun. Yummy donut bites. :3 And tea. Which I didn't have. Because I don't drink tea. I live off of juice and water and the occasional soda. o.o Have four books to read. Wonder how I'll manage that. XD Ah well. Tired now, so I'm off. Adios mis queridos. <3

Good day today. Very good day. :3

Reminders:
-First half of Ch. 16 done by Thursday for AP World History.
-Other half done by Monday.
-Biology project due on Thursday.
-Return geometry textbook tomorrow.
-Biology texbook due on Thursday.

First Block:
Quiz! Again. Dude, I swear. My notes are lacking so much lately, even though I spend so much time on them. I'm missing more than ONE question on each of the quizzes. Jesus Christ. And, I need to start looking for my old assignments for that class, too. Hopefully they're all in my old binder. If not, I lose points. Even though Ms. Ortiz said it wouldn't affect my grade too much, I don't want to risk it. But I think I probably am, either way.-.- Ah well. Other than that, I have notes to work on by Thursday.

Second block:
Gym. Yay. Fun.
*coughs*Ah well. Good thing that came out from this class? It ends on Friday, for good, and today was the last day to change into our gym clothes. Thank god.>> <<

Lunch:
Didn't eat today. Didn't have much money with me and I forgot my ticket. But, eh. I had one of Stacy's french fries and my gatorade. XD

Third Block:
Had a bit of a mood swing. Probably from reading The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold during class. It's very depressing and tragic. Then again, that's just me. And it was the 70's.*blinks and coughs*Anyways. I was moody. Near the end of the class, and we have projects to work on this week too. How fun.-.-

Fourth Block:
Had an emo moment. XD
Yet that doesn't mean I agree with Matt, either.-.-
Book made me moody and I didn't really feel like talking with anyone. I talked, but not much. I just idly asked Isela about Live Freaky, Die Freaky. Saw the trailer. Very...twisted. I still want to see it.XD Rawr, Billie Joe and Davey.>> << Hawt love slaves.*coughs and blinks*...I like candy. o.o

So! Anna, girl from geometry, sent me a picture of Johnny Depp on Myspace. XD I'd do that hawt piece of man. If I was older. Single. And older.>> << Well, no not really. Autograph is all I need. *blinks*...I have no idea where this is going. So I'll just stop. Need to start on notes. XD Adios, mis queridos! <3

Dear Diary,

Death.

That word constantly haunts me. Or does it? Is it an innocent facination? Or a twisted lust?

Whatever it may be, thoughts of it embrace me each and every night. Not in the urge to do anything rash, something more sublime than that. A curiousity that will never cease to intrigue me.

A lucious fear, mayhap?

Whatever the cause, it's there in my mind. Amongst other things.

While we're home, "safe" to some extent, people are dying. Bringing in life. Destroying our planet. Being raped of innocence. Abused. Humilated. And so many other things. I don't know why I think of things such as that, but I just do. Does it bring depression? Somewhat. But it's more of a serious bit of plotting in my mind. Thinking of ways I want to help. Whenever I can.

This is the killing zone. It's not a war zone. It's more different than that. We're all forsaken. We need salvation. We need a chance. We need love. We need mercy. We need so many things.

Our grief and confusion is nothing but a moan in the wind. The soil of this planet is soaked with blood. Our tears of happiness wash it away. But what do our tears of sorrow bring? Does a smile bring light? If so, what does a scowl bring? A grimace? A smirk? A look of disgust?

Sing for me, darling. My doll. My delicious beauty. Tell me what you feel. Is it all real?

Why do I always look so serious?

It may have to do with my constant thinking. Whether random or not, thoughts are always buzzing in my head. An endless abyss of thoughts. Dreams. Hopes. Fears. Facinations.

I know I'm not one to defend myself when put down. I know I'm stubborn, but I allows things to slip from my grasp. Though I admit, there have been few times where I have tried to keep a hold of it. But, most of the time, I let it go. No matter how much it hurts. Just let it go.

My mind is a revolution.
No matter how childish,
Depressed,
Stubborn,
Idiotic,
and Odd I may seem.

Let's fight the injustice! Poetic expression is my weapon. I'll train myself to make my words cut through steel. Through the hardest of objects. I'll make myself cold to my rivals, enemies, and those who hate me. But the warmth people say I have, will always be here. Even if you've ended up hurting me, I'll always be here.

Focus.
Focus on the pain. Happiness. Fear. Ambitions. Hopes. Dreams. Losses. Gains. Abuse. Affection.

"I'm so sick and tired of love songs. So sad and slow. So sick of all the tears, so why can't I turn off the radio?"

I love that line. It's a nice song. Ah, the ups and downs of love. Young and old, it always occurs. Intertwined with lust, you'll never be able to figure out if it's love or not. But, alas, it happens.

What was the reason for all of this? Well, this is what goes on in my mind. Every night. Every day. All the time. But it isn't even half of it. A lovely preview, no? Yet, this was also the beginning of a story that began to evolve in my mind. But it all ended up as a bit of a "rant" while I was laying on my bed in the middle of the night. Or morning. <3

XD So much fun. I remember nearly all of these.>> <<

Before the MySpace and Xanga frenzy.


Before the Internet and text messaging.


Before Sidekicks, I-Pods, and MP3players.


Before MIKE JONES.


Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX.


Before the 5 hours of homework you put off every night.


WHEN LIGHT UP SNEAKERS WERE COOL.


When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.


When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.


When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid $3.50 for a movie.


When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.


When 2Pac and Biggie where alive.


When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.

Farther back.

Or what about:

Not finished yet.

Go back to the time when: