Started crying during third today.
Fucking hell. I'm just tired of everything.
I think I'm starting to hate him.
Him being whatshisfaceexperson.
But I still love him.
And god only knows why.
Then there's the shit between my parents and me,
I felt like cutting yesterday.
Dying.
Just letting go.
But I didn't.
I just cried.
And didn't sleep because of their fighting.
I screamed to her.
Not yelled.
Let out a single, piercing scream filled with sobbing. . .
This was all yesterday.
And I started thinking about whatshisface...
And the family drama.
My grandpa.
Everything.
And I had to bite down on my bottom lip to keep from sobbing,
During third that is.
Meh.
Screw this. I'm gonna read for fourth block instead.

I'm starting to be tempted.
Maybe I should have some sort of "fling" with one of them?
I mean, they say they "love" me oh so dearly...
That I'm tempted to pretend I feel the same and tear their fucking hearts apart, shred them into tiny pieces, and grind the remains into dust. Just so I can smile wickedly and know that I'm the one that caused this pain that I've already had to go through.
I don't know.
I'm probably just bitchy again.
And the whole concept is stupid and hurtful.
Meh, I need a nap.

Once again, in fourth block. And bored of my fucking mind and wondering what to do about my two dear friends who appear to have a thing for me. How amusing. Why would they even give a flying fuck about me? I'm so emo lately it's not even funny.

Likeohmygawdnobodylovesmecutcutsobsobbleedbleedonthecarpetabyssofaheartmournmournformebitchifuckinghatej00whylovemewanttodiefuckj00deathbitches. <3

Meh, sorry. Really tired right now. All I want to do is sleep, sleep, and...sleep. But, anyways! :3 Moving on.

Presentation dates got changed. So me and Stacy have to have our presentations for English tomorrow. I think we're the fourth group. Not exactly sure. Good thing I finished my poster last night. And that I managed to write notes on flash cards, too. Incase I forget anything. Mainly about the trials of Aphrodite towards Psyche. I have a bad memory, and I didn't properly learn about those until...yesterday. >>;;;

But! I got a 96 on the test on Antigone. Maybe that saved my grade. Hopefully. I think the essay on Psyche is the only really bad thing I've done so far. But, I think I might get a second chance on it. Which means I'll be busy not only today, but tomorrow until. And I probably don't even want to get online on Friday, either. So I might call Kisa or one of my beloved hopefuls. In other words, the guys who are madly infatuated with me. *makes gagging noises*Maybe calling them and being all nice is a bad way to go.*twitches*Oh well. I have nothing better to do but to flirt with people and flirt with my inner emoness that wants to break free and DANCE! XD

...*coughs*Spanish! Nothing interesting to say. Other than the fact that I have an A! WOOOOOO! PARTY! XD And I started on Kisa's letter. :3

Lunch! Uhm, Youth Action Meeting. Found out I'm not going to go to the Anti-War Rally on the 18th.*sobs*I wanted to go. But! I might go mini-golfing. X3 Yay! Can't wait. We're going to Gulf 'N' Stuff...ies.>> << Hopefully I can go. They told us it's at five in the afternoon. So maybe I can make it. Unless my parents have other plans on April Fools Day.-.-*sighs*

So, moving on. Third period. AP World History. Nothing much to say, really. Having a test tomorrow, which means that I have notes to do today. And we have to watch a video and take notes on it, so I didn't even have time to continue with the note taking I need to have done by tomorrow.>.<

...Fourth period. I'm here. Still bored and sleepy and...meh. But, I'm staying after school today. For CAHSEE class thing. Great. Less time to finish my notes. CAHSEE test is coming up soon. As is the AP Exam for World History. Grrbitchgrrr. Have to turn in the application to take the exam today after school before heading to my CAHSEE class.*sighs*Oh well. Bell rings in less than ten minutes. I'm out. :3 Lurve. <3

Unfinished poem pieces. Seperate, poems. For now.>> <<

Is it worth crying over,
Someone who won't cry over you?
Is it worth loving someone,
Whose feelings aren't true?
Is it worth caring for someone,
Who stopped caring for you?
Is it worth hurting inside,
For someone who never thinks of you?

Will the pain ever cease?
Will the fear of love ever leave?
Will these invisible tears ever stop?
Will any of that go away?

Oh look. An ACTUAL diary entry thingy. How marvalous.

FUUUUCK!

Is is possible to fear love?
To be scared of getting attatched...
To someone?

It isn't worth crying over someone who won't cry over you.

Can't wait for the dull love to cease.
The pain is slowly leaving...
But it's still here.
But now I talk more, and I'm away from home longer.
Away from him and thoughts of him.
Only thoughts I have are of friends, family, and school.
And maybe once in a while, him.
Always painful...
Or always causing me anger.
Either way, I'm moving on.
No matter how much it hurts.
I feel more freedom now that I don't have love.
But I know I'll manage...

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥___xoxo

Narrowed it down:

Speech-Language Pathologist
Epidemiologist
Psychologist
Director of Photography
Website Designer
Anthropologist
Archivist


Classes that I should take for Speech-Language Pathologist. <3
Grade 11
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Law & Government
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development


Grade 12
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Economics
Psychology
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development

http://www.careercruising.com/Careers/JobDetails.aspx?LoginID=BA1B6AB4-F569-44AE-B34F-A89135AAD8E6&OccNumber=400&MM=1&amp;field=WorkCond

Had to take some test for my fourth block class...thing. Anyways, these are the careers and jobs that I "might" be interested in. XD


1. Epidemiologist
 
2.
Website Designer
 
3.
Naturopath
 
4.
Translator
 
5.
Technical Writer
 
6.
Writer
 
7.
Market Research Analyst
 
8.
Director of Photography
 
9.
Political Aide
 
10.
Criminologist
 
11.
Audiologist
 
12.
Management Consultant
 
13.
Biologist
 
14.
Researcher
 
15.
Physical Therapist
 
16.
Webmaster
 
17.
Occupational Therapist
 
18.
Critic
 
19.
Economist
 
20.
Physician Assistant
 
21.
Humanitarian Aid Worker
 
22.
Anthropologist
 
23.
Art / Music Therapist
 
24.
Industrial-Organizational Psychologist
 
25.
Historian
 
26.
Multimedia Developer
 
27.
Psychologist
 
28.
Zoologist
 
29.
Environmental Consultant
 
30.
Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator
 
31.
Artist
 
32.
Statistician
 
33.
Archivist
 
34.
Animator
 
35.
Graphic Designer
 
36.
Speech-Language Pathologist
 
37.
Special Effects Technician
 
38.
Illustrator
 
39.
Industrial Engineering Tech
 
40.
Physical Therapy Assistant

Typical.
Another bad day.
I'm sitting here crying and I can't stop.
It started out so fucking good and then it went back to hell.
And there was a lot of fucking stupid ass hell love songs on the radio.
FUCK IT.
I'm in no mood for fucking shit that those songs talk about.
And I'm also in no fucking mood for being at home...
Or doing school work.
I fucking swear.
I'm tired of my parents fighting.
The whole, wonderful day...
FUCKING RUINED.
I feel so fucking EMO.
I called Kisa...
But her mom said she was already asleep.
Huh. Oh well. I need to stop crying and get back to my essay.
Meh. Whatever.
Bye.

...Once again in fourth block. XD Extremely bored and listening to Panic! At the Disco. Among other things. Such as the songs by Adam and Andrew. :3 I <3 them. XD

Anyways! Onto my day.

In fourth block again.>> << Which means another diary entry. XD Unless the computers get blocked again thanks to the idiot next to me playing his music to fucking loud.-.- Like now. FUHHHH!>.<*twitches*Save me.;-;

Block One:
Had TWO tests today.@.@ Think I got a B on both.XD My grades are going down again. Crud. Anyways, I have homework to work on this weekend.@.@
Autobiographical Narrative:
Requirements: Double-spaced
*1 to 2 pages in length.
*Sentence variety.
*Use of appositions (2)
*Responds to promt
*Use of imagery (3)
Tone:Authors choice.
DictionSupport tone.
Figerative Language: to support tone.
Prompt: Why are you successful while other students are floundering? Select one specific event in your life which, in retrospect, can be seen as the springboard to your success.

So, yeah. That was basically it. That, and Mr. Vorwald telling us how he was a very strange kid.XD ...He really was.O.o

Block Two:
Test for this class too.-.- It would have been the same amount as the ones I had for first block, but the copies for the second test were messed up, so we were saved. I think it's about Nicaragua. God, I hope so. I already know half of the facts. Anyways, we had a test, turning in all our homework, and other stuff. Did some class work and listened to a lecture. Plus, we have homework.

Tarea: Definiciones; elementos de literatura pg. 13 y 14.

Basically around twenty words. More or less.

Lunch:
Nothing much happened. o.o Ate with Stacy. Talked. And that was basically it.

Block Three:
We had a guest speaker today. About the AP Exam we have to take in May. God, four freakin' hours in the library.>.< I don't know if I'll survive. o.o Mentally, that is.>> <<
Well, once again, had ANOTHER test. For this class. Managed to ace it though. :3 Yayness. But, we have homework too.-.-
Continue reading and finish chapter.
Quiz on Tuesday.
Do all maps and answer questions.
Finish SOAPs.
And yeah, that's it.>> << Got a new book from the library! :3 Two, anyways. Some version of Dracula and this book called Amy and Isabelle by Elizabeth Strout. Awesome. Mucho.

Block Four:
I'll break down. Bell is about to ring.
Getting annoyed by the dumb fuck next to me.
Had a test.
Bored.
Finished typing course yesterday.
Looking for sites that aren't blocked.
Have to go turn in work.
The end. o.o

....Wondering if I should walk or take the bus.XD Think I'll take the bus. Well, I'm off. :3 LOVE YOU! ...People. <3

Bored in computer class again. Finished some dull typing program before everyone. Gawd. Some of this people haven't been able to go higher than level two since yesterday. Jesus Christo.*sighs*Dios mio, esta gente.

Anyways! :3 Onto my day. Or whatever parts I can remember, that is.

Block one:
Gawd, I knew I shouldn't read in that class.-.- I sit right in FRONT of the damn teacher, so I can't do much because of that. He scares me. Hell, he scares alot of us. We don't want to ask him questions.XD
Anyways. Reviewed some terms and such. And then we played a game using the terms! My side of the room won, of course. :3 Five to one.XD Other than that, test tomorrow.@.@

Block two:
Boring.
As usual. Went over the homework. Read a bit. And that was it. Pero, tengo que escribe unos resumenes.*sighs*I did two, I just need...dos mas.@.@
Other than that, I think I have a good grade in that class. So far, anyways. Don't know if we have a quiz tomorrow. Maybe we do. I pray to god we don't.>.<

Lunch:
GSA meeting! <3
And in case you didn't know, it means Gay Straight Alliance. Voted for president and all that crud. And we had skittles, lemonade, and chips! I only had Pink Lemonade. I didn't eat today.-.- Oh well. I'm fine for now. :3 Anyways, meeting was fun. More new members. New straight people too.XD Though, I found out that one of Adriana's ex-boyfriends is bi and his mom found out when she walked in on him making out with his ex-boyfriend.O.o ...Adriana had heard rumors that he only went out with her to prove to people that he wasn't gay.*shakes head*Typical, Americonized, telenovela. @.@ ...Which I used to watch when I was little. Much better than English soap operas.-.- Anyways! Moving on. <3

Third block:
I barely passed the test we took yesterday with a B-. @.@ I swear, my grade might go down in that class.>.< I don't want that. I'm starting to feel ashamed if I get a C in anything. Test or permament grade. Hell, I feel ashamed if I get a B nowadays.-.- Oh well. Anyways! We had a half hour, deep, class discussion.XD Fun, fun. I participated.>> << Mucho philosophical. ^.^ Somewhere along the lines this happened... o.o

Ms. Ortiz: *says something about how these concepts applied to only man*
Stephany: So does that mean women were considered awesome? ^.^
Ms. Ortiz: They weren't even considered into their discussions of humanity and their actions.^.^;;;
Stephany, among other people: *grumbles about how thier mothers gave them life and carried them around for nine months*
Matthew:...BUT YOU ATE THE APPLE!
Me:*thinking:Said from the overly proud Christian. Go figure. o.o*

...So, yeah. Other than that, I have a quiz for this class tomorrow, as well. ^.^;;;

Block four:
...Finished my homework. And all that other class. Extremely bored right now. As you can see. XD *points down*Boredom in fourth block made me do it. o.o

If I was a country I'd be: Mexico. The history and my family coming from there is so...awesome.
If I was a bad habit I'd be: Biting of teh lips. o.o My own that is.
If I was an ice cream flavor I'd be: Rainbow Sherbert. :3
If I was a disease I'd be: ...Malaria.>> <<
If I was a feeling I'd be: Confusion.
If I was a war I'd be: French Revolution
If I was a city I'd be: San Diego
If I was a color I'd be: Some shade of blue.
If I was a movie I'd be: Mulan. >> <<
If I was a currency I'd be: Pesos
If I were a month, I'd be: August
If I were a day of the week, I'd be: Friday
If I were a time of day, I'd be: Sunset. <3
If I were a planet, I'd be: Jupiter
If I were a sea animal, I'd be: Harp Seal
If I were a direction, I'd be: West
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: ...No idea. o.o A love seat? XD
If I were a sin, I'd be: Lust.
If I were a liquid, I'd be: Water
If I were a tree, I'd be: Willow Tree
If I were a bird, I'd be: Hummingbird
If I were a tool, I'd be: Hammer
If I were a flower/plant, I'd be: Sunflower
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: Rainy/cloudy weather
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be: Electric Guitar
If I were an animal, I'd be: Some wild feline. Rawr. :3
If I were a vegetable, I'd be: Carrot
If I were a sound, I'd be: Raindrops.
If I were an element, I'd be: Water
If I were a song, I'd be: Stupid Girls by Pink
If I were a food, I'd be: Rice. o.o
If I were a material, I'd be: Satin
If I were a taste, I'd be: Somewhat spicy.
If I were a word, I'd be: Awesome. o.o
If I were a body part, I'd be: The eyes...for romantic reasons. o.o
If I were a facial expression, I'd be: Spaced out.
If I were a shape, I'd be a: Circle. >> <<
If I were a number, I'd be: ...69?XD Nah, 21.^-^
If I were a band, I'd be: I have too many to pick from. o.o Uhm, Rise Against. <-- I suppose.

In fourth block again. I don't even want to go home today. Which is why I'm walking home. If I am on, I'll be working on homework. Tons of it, if I'm not too tired. School was pretty good. Which is why I don't want to go home to more crud like yesterday.-.- Most of which I didn't do anything. But that is nor here or there...And I'm starting to sound like Ms. Ortiz with that. XD

Well, onto my day! :3

Block one:
Ohmygawd. Today it was so damn hilarious. XD We were going over setence structures and whatnot, and we ended up working on a game using what we had learned the day before. The first sentense is the beginning of a "story." Which is what we originally started with. The first and last sentences are our own. Everything in between is written by the people on our role. And here's what came from mine:

Simple: She had a strange dream.
Compound: She had a strange dream, and it was about a crazy, rolling dinosaur.
Complex: Although she was asleep, she thought the crazy dinosaur was going to eat her.
Compound/Complex: Although she ran from the dinosaur, he still caught up to her and he held her in his hand.
Simple: The dinosaur loved her.
Compound: The dinosaur loved her, but the girl was in love with a stripper.
Complex: She told this to the dinosaur, and then realized she was having a strange dream.

...I swear. Mr. Vorwald is afraid of us now. He finally knows what the hell is going on through our minds. XD But we're too adorable for him to hate or fear us. *bats her eyelashes innocently*...well, maybe not adorable. More like a bunch of...honors/AP students with twisted minds.

Block two:
Spanish...ay. I got a high score on Wednesday's test. More or less, anyway. If it wasn't for me wanting to show that I could pass it, I would have pretended I was stupid.-.- With Spanish, anyway.>> << Had another test today.XD Eh, think I failed it. Or got something lower than a B.-.- Crud. And I'm not allowed to change classes.;-; *sobs*I already got a notice. It was a big, overweight, bold, NO. *ripped up the paper*>> << I wasn't the only one that did that, though. XD

Lunch:
Not much happened. Had to pay for my lunch, which is another reason as to why I'm walking home.^.^;;; But! Stacy showed me this...X3

I will find you. I will take you to bed and have my way with you. You will moan and groan and beg me to stop. I'll exhaust you and leave you weak for days.
          Sincerely,
             The Flu.

I swear, it sounded so wrong until she said the end of it. XD But, yeah, only thing that happened at lunch.>> <<

Block three:
We didn't have a quiz!
And Bird still doesn't want me to stress over the notes. So she's basically going to finish them up. I'll offer to help again today. If I can. But, I do have other things to do for this class; a DBQ and three time traveler journal entries. Plus a quiz on Monday. Other than that, Stacy left early for a soccer game and I read for the rest of the period...and talked with Diane. Basically her telling me about her crazy, Texan, AP Spanish teacher who tends to yell and storm out of the room.XD But, yeah.>> <<

Block four:
Ay, dios mio...help me.;-;
I'm stuck in class with some fucktard trying to hit up on the girl next to him. And the ghetto dimwit is sitting next to me.>.< GAWD! *sulks*Other than that, I finished my work yesterday. And quickly wrote a random paragraph that's due Monday, as well. Which means I can either be here or reading. So I'm doing both. ^-^

Eh, I'm off. Have homework for Spanish, English, and History. I finished homework for computers, so I don't have to worry about that. Hopefully I get everything done this weekend. Most of all the work I have revolves around essays. -.- Oh well. Adios, mis queridos. Grumpy old man. And my non-lesbian lover. <3