Mm, wasn't on this weekend.
Not like much went on, really. Stayed after school on Friday for my CAHSEE class and then went to my godfather's cafe with Stacy. He was there, but didn't notice us until after we paid. XD Ah well. He said to tell Darryl that he'll let us use his cafe for the Resistance Fest. Mucho awesomeness.

Afterwards me and Stacy got some Chinese food and went to my house. She stayed until around ten and we mostly ended up hanging out outside and then in my room. Which was when we called Shelby for a bit. Much fun. <3

The Saturday got uber bad. As usal. Family shit as always. And I thought I was getting over Matt. But I'm not. Now I'm getting depressed again, so I'm off. Ciao. <3

Won't be on much today. I have my CAHSEE class after school, and me and Stacy are planning on heading to my godfather's cafe, Cafe Kashmir, after school for a while. Or, at least somewhere. Then I'm going to work on stuff when I get home. Or, so I think. Anyways, onto saving some webcomics that I want to read...while in fourth block, bored out of my effing mind.

http://www.operafloozy.com/butterfly/main.html

http://www.strangecandy.net/

http://www.crystalrider.com/comics.html

http://www.strangeacademy.com/

http://aka.concealed-attraction.net/

http://nocrap.comicgen.com/

Actually having a good day today. Other than thinking about him and getting depressed, everything was okie. And, sorry Arky, about ranting about everything.*snuggles*<3

Anyways, it's messed up that I'm having a good day, but I'm exhausted. It's like, grrbitchgrr. I almost fell asleep during English. And I almost fell asleep about THREE times during Spanish. Didn't fall asleep during history, because Stacy sat next to me. And we ended up thinking of what we like in a guy. XD Very fun. She also knows that I have an obsesion with Japanese guys. Especially Jrockers. Mmm, sexy. >> <<

Uhm, for English...I found out I did well on the final draft of the essay on Psyche! Which means it may have helped my grade. For next semester, I guess. We have to work on an essay tomorrow, though. I can't remember. But I think we do. We had a small quiz today. Kind of spaced out(almost fell asleep) during it. And we finished reading the first chapter of A Tale Of Two Cities as well. We have to have up to chapter four finished by tomorrow, as far I know.

Spanish. Ugh, have to force myself to finish a whole book before the 29th. And also get done more than ten summaries and a four page essay about the book, too. God, I'm so behind. And we also have a presentation to have done before Spring Break. Even worse than the essay. I don't know ANYONE in that class. So, meh. I'm screwed. Have to read two books today. Which means no time to read the book I bought when I went to Santa Barbara. --> The Vampire Lestat. ;-;

Lunch. Nothing happened. GSA meeting was canceled. The line to return the papers for the AP Exams was too long, so me and Stacy left to Ms. Ortiz's room. And, yeah. Very boring lunch. >> << But that reminds! I got lots of compliments about my hair. :3 People liked it. Many are glad that they can finally see my face.XD Stacy's mom even said I had pretty eyes. o.o

...Anyways! History. Very boring. Thankfully Bird gave me a heads up as to what we had to do today. So me and Stacy ended up whispering too each other for most of the class period. Which leads back to the appearance of guys, but eh. XD Other than that, we didn't really do much. Essay tomorrow for this class, too. Dealing with tonights reading. So, yeah. That's what I'll be doing tonight. Reading and writing.-.-

As for computers, the first half was kind of hilarious. The guy next to me is an uber homophobe. Said how he can't be friends with some guy anymore because he came out. And then he and the two girls on his right got into an arguement about homosexuality. One of them is straight and has nothing against them, and the other one is bi. So, because I knew it wouldn't end any time sooner, I had to say something. Which was basically how straight parents can give birth to gay children. And because society says that a guy must like a girl and vice versa, some people don't always know that they're gay until something happens. So as far as he knows, he could be gay too. And that made him shut up. X3

...Eh, tired of typing. Need to start on my work. Adios. <3

Basics
1. Name: Stephanie.
2. Nicknames: Stephy
3. Birthday: August 21st.
4. Place of Birth: Somewhere.
5. Zodiac Sign: Leo.
6. Gender: Female
7. Age: 15 1/2
8. School: SEHS.
9. Occupation: Student, lesbian lover to Shelby. <3
10. Location: Southern California.
11. Screen Name: For what place?


Appearance
12. Hair Color: Dark brown with blondish highlights.
13. Hair Length: Passed my shoulders.
14. Eye Color: Dark brown.
15. Nail Appearance: Black and blue.
16. Height: 5'5
17. Do you have a crush on someone? Mmhm.
18. Do you like yourself?: Not really.
19. Braces? No.
20. Do you think you're hot? Hell no.
21. Piercing: Nothing.
23. Right or Left-handed: Right

"Firsts"
24. First Kiss: Nobody.
25. First Boyfriend/Girlfriend?: Meh, Matt.
26. First Best Friend(s): Blanca in fourth grade. But Stacy since 7th grade.
27. First Award: Can't remember.
28. First Sport You Joined: None, I think.
29. First Pet: Doggie.
30. First Vacation: Somewhere in Baja California.
31. First Concert: None.
32. First Love: Person in elementry school.
33. First real Love: My ex.

Favorites
33. Movie: Phantom of the Opera, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Cry Baby, The Corpse Bride, Disney flick, etc etc.
34. TV Show: Eh, none.
35. Color: I have no favorite.
36. Bands: Do you honestly want the ever growing list?
37. Song: ...Must I repeat myself, as well?
38. Food: Mexican and Italian.
39. Drink: Pink Lemonade and juice.
40. Candy: Anything fruit flavored.
41. Sport to Play: I don't have a death wish.
42. Sport to Watch: Soccer.
43. Brand of Clothing: I have none.
44. Stores: Whatever.
45. School Subject: AP World History.
46. Animal: Domestic and wild cats, wolves, pandas...
47. Books: I have many. <3
48. Magazines: None.



Currently
49. Eating: Nothing.
50. Drinking: Again, nothing.
52. online?: Yes, sherlock.
53. Listening to: Miyavi. <3
54. Thinking About: Shelby. Kisses! <3
55. Wanting To: Go to bed.
56. Watching: Foamy. :3

Future
58. Want Kids?: Yush.
59. Want to Get Married?: I think so, yeah.
60. Career in Mind: Still haven't decieded. Speech-Language Pathologist, perhaps? Some kind of doctor or nurse, really. Photography and writing being my hobbies of interest.



Preference
67. Cute or Sexy: Cute.
68. Lips or Eyes: Eyes.
69. Hugs or Kisses: Both.
70. Short or tall: Tall, I guess.
71. Easygoing or Serious: Uhm, easy going.
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: Both. <3
73. Fatty or Skinny: Doesn't matter. XD
74. Sensitive or loud: Eh, a little bit of both?
75. Hook-up or Relationship: Relationship.
76. Sweet or Caring: Both. <3
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: Both for sure.


Have You Ever
78. Kissed a Stranger: No.
79. Drank Alcohol: Just a sip.
80. Smoked: No.
81. Ran Away From Home: I've thought about it.
82. Broken a Bone: Not yet.
83. Gotten an X-ray: Nope.
84. Broken Someone's Heart: I think so.
85. Broken Up With Someone: Mmhm.
86. Turned Someone Down: Uhm, yup. Hard to believe, no?
87. Cried When Someone Died: *nods*My grandpa....
88. Cried At School: Many times.



Beliefs
89. God: Maybe.
90. Miracles: Sort of.
91. Love At First Sight: Not really.
92. Ghosts: Maybe.
93. Aliens: YUSH!
94. Soul Mates: Again, maybe.
95. Heaven: Hopefully.
96. Hell: Of course.
98. Kissing on The First Date: On the cheek, I suppose.
99. Horoscopes: Depends.

100. Is There Someone You Want But You Know You Can't Have?: Yup.

Started crying during third today.
Fucking hell. I'm just tired of everything.
I think I'm starting to hate him.
Him being whatshisfaceexperson.
But I still love him.
And god only knows why.
Then there's the shit between my parents and me,
I felt like cutting yesterday.
Dying.
Just letting go.
But I didn't.
I just cried.
And didn't sleep because of their fighting.
I screamed to her.
Not yelled.
Let out a single, piercing scream filled with sobbing. . .
This was all yesterday.
And I started thinking about whatshisface...
And the family drama.
My grandpa.
Everything.
And I had to bite down on my bottom lip to keep from sobbing,
During third that is.
Meh.
Screw this. I'm gonna read for fourth block instead.

I'm starting to be tempted.
Maybe I should have some sort of "fling" with one of them?
I mean, they say they "love" me oh so dearly...
That I'm tempted to pretend I feel the same and tear their fucking hearts apart, shred them into tiny pieces, and grind the remains into dust. Just so I can smile wickedly and know that I'm the one that caused this pain that I've already had to go through.
I don't know.
I'm probably just bitchy again.
And the whole concept is stupid and hurtful.
Meh, I need a nap.

Once again, in fourth block. And bored of my fucking mind and wondering what to do about my two dear friends who appear to have a thing for me. How amusing. Why would they even give a flying fuck about me? I'm so emo lately it's not even funny.

Likeohmygawdnobodylovesmecutcutsobsobbleedbleedonthecarpetabyssofaheartmournmournformebitchifuckinghatej00whylovemewanttodiefuckj00deathbitches. <3

Meh, sorry. Really tired right now. All I want to do is sleep, sleep, and...sleep. But, anyways! :3 Moving on.

Presentation dates got changed. So me and Stacy have to have our presentations for English tomorrow. I think we're the fourth group. Not exactly sure. Good thing I finished my poster last night. And that I managed to write notes on flash cards, too. Incase I forget anything. Mainly about the trials of Aphrodite towards Psyche. I have a bad memory, and I didn't properly learn about those until...yesterday. >>;;;

But! I got a 96 on the test on Antigone. Maybe that saved my grade. Hopefully. I think the essay on Psyche is the only really bad thing I've done so far. But, I think I might get a second chance on it. Which means I'll be busy not only today, but tomorrow until. And I probably don't even want to get online on Friday, either. So I might call Kisa or one of my beloved hopefuls. In other words, the guys who are madly infatuated with me. *makes gagging noises*Maybe calling them and being all nice is a bad way to go.*twitches*Oh well. I have nothing better to do but to flirt with people and flirt with my inner emoness that wants to break free and DANCE! XD

...*coughs*Spanish! Nothing interesting to say. Other than the fact that I have an A! WOOOOOO! PARTY! XD And I started on Kisa's letter. :3

Lunch! Uhm, Youth Action Meeting. Found out I'm not going to go to the Anti-War Rally on the 18th.*sobs*I wanted to go. But! I might go mini-golfing. X3 Yay! Can't wait. We're going to Gulf 'N' Stuff...ies.>> << Hopefully I can go. They told us it's at five in the afternoon. So maybe I can make it. Unless my parents have other plans on April Fools Day.-.-*sighs*

So, moving on. Third period. AP World History. Nothing much to say, really. Having a test tomorrow, which means that I have notes to do today. And we have to watch a video and take notes on it, so I didn't even have time to continue with the note taking I need to have done by tomorrow.>.<

...Fourth period. I'm here. Still bored and sleepy and...meh. But, I'm staying after school today. For CAHSEE class thing. Great. Less time to finish my notes. CAHSEE test is coming up soon. As is the AP Exam for World History. Grrbitchgrrr. Have to turn in the application to take the exam today after school before heading to my CAHSEE class.*sighs*Oh well. Bell rings in less than ten minutes. I'm out. :3 Lurve. <3

Unfinished poem pieces. Seperate, poems. For now.>> <<

Is it worth crying over,
Someone who won't cry over you?
Is it worth loving someone,
Whose feelings aren't true?
Is it worth caring for someone,
Who stopped caring for you?
Is it worth hurting inside,
For someone who never thinks of you?

Will the pain ever cease?
Will the fear of love ever leave?
Will these invisible tears ever stop?
Will any of that go away?

Oh look. An ACTUAL diary entry thingy. How marvalous.

FUUUUCK!

Is is possible to fear love?
To be scared of getting attatched...
To someone?

It isn't worth crying over someone who won't cry over you.

Can't wait for the dull love to cease.
The pain is slowly leaving...
But it's still here.
But now I talk more, and I'm away from home longer.
Away from him and thoughts of him.
Only thoughts I have are of friends, family, and school.
And maybe once in a while, him.
Always painful...
Or always causing me anger.
Either way, I'm moving on.
No matter how much it hurts.
I feel more freedom now that I don't have love.
But I know I'll manage...

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥___xoxo

Narrowed it down:

Speech-Language Pathologist
Epidemiologist
Psychologist
Director of Photography
Website Designer
Anthropologist
Archivist


Classes that I should take for Speech-Language Pathologist. <3
Grade 11
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Law & Government
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development


Grade 12
English
Journalism & Communication
Mathematics
Biology
Chemistry
Economics
Psychology
Computers
International Languages
Child Care & Development

http://www.careercruising.com/Careers/JobDetails.aspx?LoginID=BA1B6AB4-F569-44AE-B34F-A89135AAD8E6&OccNumber=400&MM=1&amp;field=WorkCond

Had to take some test for my fourth block class...thing. Anyways, these are the careers and jobs that I "might" be interested in. XD


1. Epidemiologist
 
2.
Website Designer
 
3.
Naturopath
 
4.
Translator
 
5.
Technical Writer
 
6.
Writer
 
7.
Market Research Analyst
 
8.
Director of Photography
 
9.
Political Aide
 
10.
Criminologist
 
11.
Audiologist
 
12.
Management Consultant
 
13.
Biologist
 
14.
Researcher
 
15.
Physical Therapist
 
16.
Webmaster
 
17.
Occupational Therapist
 
18.
Critic
 
19.
Economist
 
20.
Physician Assistant
 
21.
Humanitarian Aid Worker
 
22.
Anthropologist
 
23.
Art / Music Therapist
 
24.
Industrial-Organizational Psychologist
 
25.
Historian
 
26.
Multimedia Developer
 
27.
Psychologist
 
28.
Zoologist
 
29.
Environmental Consultant
 
30.
Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator
 
31.
Artist
 
32.
Statistician
 
33.
Archivist
 
34.
Animator
 
35.
Graphic Designer
 
36.
Speech-Language Pathologist
 
37.
Special Effects Technician
 
38.
Illustrator
 
39.
Industrial Engineering Tech
 
40.
Physical Therapy Assistant

Typical.
Another bad day.
I'm sitting here crying and I can't stop.
It started out so fucking good and then it went back to hell.
And there was a lot of fucking stupid ass hell love songs on the radio.
FUCK IT.
I'm in no mood for fucking shit that those songs talk about.
And I'm also in no fucking mood for being at home...
Or doing school work.
I fucking swear.
I'm tired of my parents fighting.
The whole, wonderful day...
FUCKING RUINED.
I feel so fucking EMO.
I called Kisa...
But her mom said she was already asleep.
Huh. Oh well. I need to stop crying and get back to my essay.
Meh. Whatever.
Bye.