[Just another heartache on my lips.]'s diary

774602  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-04-09
Written: (6806 days ago)

Giving up on so many things.
Haa. I love it oh so much.
Fuck you and your lies. <3
:3 Pathetic excuse for a human.
Go fuck a knife or something.
Squee!
I hate you. ^^

774304  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-04-08
Written: (6807 days ago)

Family drama. Again.
Lucky you can't hear my mom slamming every door she can.*sighs*
Swear, these are the times when I just want to crawl off and die.
Or run away.
Whichever comes first, ya know?
*sighs*I feel like crying...
And I'm more suicidal than ever!
Wonderful...</3>
774238  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-04-08
Written: (6807 days ago)

"Hit 'N' Run"

by Horrorpops.


Hit 'n' Run
Hit and run by love
But broken less than i ask for
Just another crease
Another bump to pass by,
A bruise to heal


I've gotten the wouldn't you rather be friends
I guess that could make sense
If we hadn't kisses
If you hadn't made me feel like I
Could never be missed


Let on by love and crushed by love
Well, it's nothing to cry for
I'm not the first to be lied to
A tainted heart, rancid lust
Never should, never said
Never felt sorry


Everlasting love
Turned out to be nothing
Ha- its rather bleak-yeah
But I've been sucker punched
One hell of a lot


Let on by love and crushed by love
Well, it's nothing to cry for
No, i'm not the first to be lied to
A tainted heart, rancid lust
Never should, never said
Never felt
Sorry for falling in love
A one night off and I wanted more
But I never felt, never said
Never been sorry
773971  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-04-07
Written: (6807 days ago)

Thinking of him makes me wanna gag. ^^

773636  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-04-07
Written: (6808 days ago)

"Strawberry Gashes"

By Jack Off Jill.


Turn her over
A candle is lit, I see through her
Blow it out and save all her ashes for me


Curse me sold her
The poison that runs it's course through her
Pale white skin with strawberry gashes all over all over


Watch me fault her
You're living like a disaster
She said kill me faster
with strawberry gashes all over


Called her over
and asked her if she was improving
She said "feels fine" it's wonderful wonderful here


Hex me told her
I dreamt of a devil that knew her
Pale white skin with strawberry gashes all over all over


Watch me fault her
You're living like a disaster
She said kill me faster
with strawberry gashes all over


I lay quiet
waiting for her voice to say
"Some things you lose and some things you just give away"


Scold me failed her
If only I'd held on tighter to her
Pale white skin that twisted and withered away from me away from me


Watch me lose her
It's almost like losing myself
Give her my soul
and let them take somebody else get away from me


Watch me fault her
You're living like a disaster
She said kill me faster
with strawberry gashes all over all over me

773469  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-04-06
Written: (6809 days ago)

Heroes always fail.



Gawd, I have TWO porjects to do for English.
One project for Spanish that I have to do on my OWN.
And I don't even have the prompt.
I'll go after school. Meh.
Another thing: Finish novel for English.
Read two chapters for History.
Read 70 chapters of the Da Vinci Code for book club.
Test on the two chapters for history.
Two tests for English.
An essay due for English as well.
AP testing in May.
Along with other tests.
Meh. So stressed.
And Adriana wants to come over tomorrow.-.-
This is my oh so lovely spring break.
Shiiit.
Ah well. I'm out.
Fuck it all and you. ^^ <3
Haa. you know I love you.
Well, most of you. <3

773152  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-04-04
Written: (6811 days ago)

Kill me faster with strawberry gashes all over...



Tyler made me depressed. :D
And I was having such a good day too...
Managed not to miss Dan so much,
And still giggling over history.
But alas, I'm back to feeling emo.
Farewell, my darlings. <3
772911  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-04-03
Written: (6812 days ago)

Mama I just killed a man. Put a gun against his head, pulled the trigger, and now he's dead.



Ew. You look like bad porn.


*dances*Chris, my star, dropped by before third block started. *giggles*He's so adorable. :3 If only he wasn't gay. xD Ah well. I wuvvles him. <3

Anywho! Left early from first block to see some therapist lady. She wanted to test me for A.D.D.*giggles absently*Ah, I don't have A.D.D. I just day dream alot. Of being happy, losing weight, anime, prince/princess charming, life. *hums*It's all a dream for meeeee! *sings*

Ohmygawd. History was so fun! *twirls*Such a random an doh so naughteh conversation. We couldn't stop laughing. XD Wonderbra, fuzzy pink handcuffs, drag queens, Amsterdam, and Tarzan! *falls over laughing* xD Ay, dios mio.

Anyways, close to finishing KH2! Oh, My Axel, dearest.*sniffs*;-; Anyways, I'm out. May not be on much today. Not like it matters, so adios! <3

772093  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-04-02
Written: (6813 days ago)

Forgot to take my Prozac today.*giggles*
I feel like hurting myself. :3
Ah well.
Today was dull.
Played Kingdom Hearts and did lots of homework and cleaning.
Now it's time to supress the Emoness and finish on my homework.
Fuck you and good night. <3
771933  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-04-01
Written: (6814 days ago)

Fuck you. <3



Have a good fucking life.


Excuse me while I go on a world wide suicide spree.


I'm gone. KH2 and homework call. Must escape the inner emo. Fuck you and good night. <3
771605  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-31
Written: (6815 days ago)

We're in lockdown mode! And I'm stuck in computers.



*cackles*<3
770385  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-03-29
Written: (6817 days ago)

Look what Chris, my star, filled out for me. ;-;


From: Stephy
Date: Mar 28, 2006 9:22 PM

Dear Stephy.

I have always wanted to hug you.

you have a cute smile =)

You make me want to become straight or bi.

You should feel good because of that.

Someday I will take a picture with you? hopefully!!

You + me= Stephris or Chrisphy or Youme

If I saw you now I'd hug you.

I would build a theme park called stephyland just for you.

I would get your name tattooed on my ankle, idky.

If I could sing you any song it would be um... that one song from gravy train.. lol!

We could have a gay parade under the stars.

My love for you is like that of a gay man's love for a bisexual woman. lol idk..

Love,
Christophernopolis aka Chrisphy

(P.S. you make me wanna la la.)

770240  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-28
Written: (6817 days ago)

My Buddies from school. X3


Saving these for something. <3


Bird!
<img250*0:http://myspace-821.vo.llnwd.net/00568/12/85/568695821_l.jpg>

Diane. <3
<img250*0:http://myspace-782.vo.llnwd.net/00393/28/74/393844782_l.jpg>

Chris! My star. <3
<img250*0:http://myspace-483.vo.llnwd.net/00483/38/49/483179483_l.jpg>

Albert.
<img:http://myspace-647.vo.llnwd.net/00560/74/68/560578647_l.jpg>

Stephany, my Youth Action buddie.
<img250*0:http://myspace-614.vo.llnwd.net/00605/41/69/605549614_l.jpg>

Maricruz. On the left. >>;
<img:http://myspace-269.vo.llnwd.net/00310/96/27/310787269_l.jpg>

Maria.
<img250*0:http://myspace-601.vo.llnwd.net/00496/10/67/496227601_l.jpg>

Victor and Maria. ^-^ Not a couple. And hey look, our school! XD
<img250*0:http://myspace-262.vo.llnwd.net/00557/26/20/557030262_l.jpg>

Jocelyin.
<img250*0:http://myspace-568.vo.llnwd.net/00303/86/53/303293568_l.jpg>

Adan.
<img250*0:http://myspace-182.vo.llnwd.net/00498/28/14/498834182_l.jpg>

The people I know in this pic: Bottom lef is Jeanette, behind her is Albert, and behind him is Christino. The guy with the hat and awesome glasses(at the bottom) is Jorge. And then it's Diane!
<img250*0:http://myspace-149.vo.llnwd.net/00375/94/18/375648149_l.jpg>



770144  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-28
Written: (6817 days ago)

Still on lockdown at school. But they made us go to three out of four of our classes, which means I'm currently in fourth block (computers). The only classes I went to were first, third, and fourth. Honors English, AP World History, and computers, of course.

I'm not even sure if there was another walkout today. Why even bother? They're currently going to vote and alter the law today, aren't they? What's the use in this whole walkout buisness? And the waving of Latin flags? It's stupid really. If you want your rights here, at least wave the American flag with the flag of your nationality. I can't help by laugh. Yet get frustrated soon afterwards.

I have to finish my four page book report for Spanish today. Just in case we're not on lockdown again tomorrow. I also have to read six chapters for my Honors English class, and review all over again for history. By tomorrow. Fun, fun. I also have alot of things to work on for computers. Thanks to the lockdown, I didn't have time to even work on them on Friday. And I forgot my floppy and the word program won't open, either. So I can't even do anything for this class.

Well, I want to go to Europe next year with Stacy...and other people from the school. Ah well. We doubt we'll have time to do much after highschool, so we need to get it over with.

And Dan is gonna be out of the country for two weeks. I'm gonna miss him.*sobs*

PMSing right now. In a class full of ignorant fucks. I'm gonna go. Adios. <3

769734  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-28
Written: (6818 days ago)

...Need to fix this up. Badly.


The dog wears the face of a man again
He's back to his beastly actions
He's on the prowl for hearts to take
And feed upon emotions
The dog wears the face of affection
Even though he's filled with hate
His heart is an abyss of nothingness
With eyes that not one can relate
The dog wears the face of love
Which is nothing he has ever felt
All he knows is how to handle
The hearts that he has dealth
The dog wears a broken heart
Taken from his latest doll
He broke her heart
Grounded it out
And is on the prowl again.

769718  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-28
Written: (6818 days ago)

Still in an emo mood, but whatever.
So, an update of today.

Got stuck in first block for SEVEN FUCKING HOURS.
Thanks to another idiot walk out.
The march was so much better.
The walkout was nothing but shit.
Thanks, idiots.
We didn't get lunch until two o'clock...
And school ends at 2:53pm.
What the hell?
It was so fucking frustrating staying in an over crowded, stuffy, room.
...I was stuck in my Honors English class for SEVEN HOURS.
And we had two fucking tests! One of which I fucked up on with my bad memory.
It was horrible.
And then I got sick and even more emo during the second hour.
If there is another fucking walkout tomorrow, I'm bringing lunch.
And a book to read, goddamnit.
One more thing, Dan is uber sweet. <3
And I'm thinking of going to Europe next year.
Bai.

767831  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-24
Written: (6821 days ago)

Moving on from the last diary entry. >>;;;
Dad picked me up from school. Dear god. There was a long line of parents waiting to get their kids out of school. I think Stacy ended up staying in her class. Need to call her in a bit and check up on her.@.@

Dude, they took like almost two hours to bring us food. And I did not want to eat pizza.>.< Or drink milk. MEH! I had some home made caldo de pollo (chicken soup) once I got home. Nummeh.

My god. But the whole think started at around 9:40am. During second block. God. It was amusing for only the first hour. After that, we all got pretty twitchy and stuff. God knows how long they're going to keep everyone else in there.

ANYWAYS! Don't know if I'll be on much today. I do know that I won't be on tomorrow. Going to Disney's California Adventure. XD Getting Shelby a post card. *nods*>> << So, yeah. I'm still pretty sick, so I'm gonna go rest for a bit before starting homework. Adios. <3


One of my favorite songs at the moment.



Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield


I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned


Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find


Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten


Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way


Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find


Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins


Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten


Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find


Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins


Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten


Oh, yeah, yeah


767827  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-24
Written: (6821 days ago)

There was a walkout today at school.
About what? The new Immigration laws that they are trying to pass.
Ohmygawd. Could it have been less chaotic?
Jesus Christ. I noticed that most of the people that walked out,
All look like cholo fucks.
And I know for a fact...
That not many of the people who walked out,
Did it for the actual cause.
Knowing the types of people that were going to walk out,
I didn't do shit.
Not only that. But it needed to be more organized.
Like the march that's going on tomorrow.
Unlike today, most of the people shown on tv,
Looked the wild animals.
MONKIES!
Jesus fucking Christ.
It's all a game of ignorance.
Really wish it hadn't ruined the school day.
I didn't want to be kept for over two hours in Spanish.
Can you still I'm pissed off?
Even though I'm home?
Fucking Christ.
I'm not saying it wasn't for a good cause...
But c'mon!
Do we truely know if they will pass the law?
And if they do, do you know how badly that will effect our economy?
American ain't shit without the "illegal aliens."
Even though the people passing this law,
Are illegal too.
Only the Native Americans are not considered immigrants.
Everyone else is.
Stupid fuck tards.

767314  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-03-23
Written: (6822 days ago)

So, yeah. Dan is my new cuddle buddy/"significant other" as he likes to call it. I hope I don't get too attatched.

Anyways, I have five assignments for Spanish, along with three take home tests. The rest of the chapter to finish for history, by tomorrow, I believe. And I also have to read two chapters for Spanish. And then some possible family trouble. Plus, I don't know if I can stay after school to watch Bernadette. Eh, think I'll just go home.

Anyways, in fourth block right now. Which means I have work to do. And I don't know if I'll be on much today, Friday, or the rest of the weekend. So, bye.

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