So hows about Chronicles of Stupid part 1 ZING!
NOTE: the campaign was a Fo campaign set up in Texas. Set near Central Texas. All characters in this party were male.
The characters of this session are Ok(tribal), Mena(gecko hunter), Kia(tribal shaman), Alvin(tribal), and Totz(scout)
The party was just waking up in their brahim hide tents and beginnining to go through their morning routine of stretches. After waking up they each had a breakfast consisting of brahim jerky and fruit (actually it was the last of the reserves which means they would have to go hunting again for themselves and the rest of their tribe.
Unfortunately do to the fact that the land they lived wasn't fertile enough to support anything other than cactus' and assorted plains grass that they ate when times were really down so their tribe was a group of nomad that had to travel alot to find food which was actually starting to get difficult because it was tornado season. So upon Kia's command they organized a hunting party to go after geckos.
The party was together they set off east in search of game with hardly any water (I think there was like maybe 2 liters of water between the 5 of them) and food (each had only 1 meals worth of rations each). It took about 4 hours of careful tracking with use of Totz survival skill to notice track in the dirt of a creature the size of a dog but it's track were frequent and close together (much like that of a roach, radscorpion, or ant. DONK! here comes the clueX4 maybe an encounter they may or not able to handle who knows). So far as they knew due to botched perceptions roll for the lot of them they thought they were huntings wovles or wild dogs. Another 2 and a half hours of hunting and no dice. Nothing.
So Ok decides to sit down while setting his spear down near a pile of bones that were obviously human. Thirst and hunger were hitting him like a fuckton of bricks so he decides at random to check this pile and finds absolutely nothing besides a few caps and a rusted harmonica. The rest of the party confused and bewildered at the discover of this dissonant tetanus riddled musical instrument start to fight over like a bunch of savages. Ok gets defensive and start holding the Harmonica closer. Alvin lunges for it pushing Ok over and back. The ground beneath them fell through (3 meters fall) and they were both lying in a dark pit of bones they could see something glistening in the dim light and it was moving towards them at quick speeds. Ok goes to grab his spear realizing that he left it up near the pit (the player playing Ok gets pissed and claims bullshit although he said what he was doing when he sat down and put his spear down on the ground.) starts trying to climb out of the pit, Alvin who is triumphing over taking the Harmonica from Ok begins to notice something flying through air at him at an overhead angle. He tries to dodge and gets pegged in the left ankle he begins to feel his leg stinging rather painfully as radscorpion venom is injected in his blood stream via his torn muscles. Alvin pulls his knife and in turn attacks the Radscorpion and CRITICALS it stabbing it right in its eyes. He managed to make it squeal in pain as hit tried to sting him again. Ok managed to climb out of the hole thanks to the party's help. They panic and take off running leaving Alvin alone and in the pit with the rad scorpion. They were so scared that they thought there would be more rad scorpions nearby (they guessed that one right, actually try 2 large rad scorpions and 2 small rad scorpions).
Down in pit Alvin is going commando with scorpion and luckily criticals again, this time killing the rad scopion he being resourceful uses his knife and a few bones to climb out. He got out of the pit an hour later and realized that he left to die by his party leaving him high and dry in the middle of no where. He found Ok's spear still laying on the ground and stumbles off in a direction to where he thinks the party went. He was poisoned, dehydrated and hungry.
Meanwhile the party's vibrations and noise alerted the other rad scorpions of the presence. The other 4 party members were tired and thirsty from their panic from the earlier encounter with the rad scorpion. Totz, the scout remembers he tagged the survival skill and begins searching for water and find three cacti. He has taken care of the party's water needs for the moment. They decide since night fall it upon them that it would be a good idea if they set up camp without any type of survival gear and tough out the cold almost freezing temperatures of the desert night. They set up watchers and start sleeping.
The rad scorpions had tracked them down and launched a late night attack on the party. They were surprised so the rad scorps got the first strike they all hit Mena and Ok which were both sleeping. After taking minor injuries from getting stung and poisoned they attacked back Mena with a sledge hammer and Ok with his fist. Mena did some serious damage to the rad scorp attacking him which cause one of it's pincers to fall off spraying a milky fluid every where. Ok critically missed and lost his next turn. The rest of the party sprang to and started goint after the two rad scorps on their friends. Keep in mind the other rad scorps were coming in from behind and attacked the rear and the flanks of the party. One of them criticaled and killed Kia in TWO attacks. Mena killed the rad scorp he was fighting he then moved into range of the large rad scorp that was attacking kia. The rad scorp in turn shook kia off of his tail and start gunning for Mena missing both times. Ok missed each strike eight times in a row and was getting pissied. Totz got behind the rad scorpion attacking Ok and manage to cripple the small rad scorpion by cleaving its tail clean off with his combat knife. A te second large rad scorpion moves in on Mena and swings missing him but striking his rad scorpion brother in the face which blinded it. Mena got hit by the second hit though and got a decent sized chunk rippped out of his leg which sent him falling to the ground screaming as the rad scorps tail pulled out. Ok finally connected 2 successful kicks into the small rad scorpions face cracking its carapace open and letting its contents spill onto the dirt. Totz an Ok moved into help Mena out and attacked the blind rad scorpion and barely managed to kill it. Mena got sturck again this time in the stomach which ripped his gut open and pulled intestines out like they were silly string. Mena was at 3 HP by this point. Ok picked up Mena's Sledge Hammer and smashed the rad scorpion real hard in it's brain causing it to be knocked out. Totz stabbed the shit out of it and killed it horribly.
After assesing that Kia was dead and Mena was dying they decided it would be wise if they put Mena out of his misery (for shame no one except for Kia took the Doctor and First Aid skill). They clipped the rad scorpions tail and decided to head off. At this point they were starting to feel the pain induced by the Rad scorpions venom.
Remember Alvin due to his amazingly high 10 luck he happened upon a caravan that was heading towards Waco. Because he was in serious need of help he got a ride with them provided he didn't start any fights or steal anything. He turned his weapon over to the caravan guards and went safely with the caravan.
Upon reaching Waco he discovered that were people past his tribe. People of all shapes sizes and economic situation were here in this city. There was some type of weird bartering bazaar in the parking lot of some place called Wa Mar(wal mart sans the l and the t). He however was in need of some anti venom stumbled into Doc's Deaths Demented Doctoring. Upon entering there was some man chopping the arm off of some one who looked unconscious or dead. Doc Death said "take a number I will be right with when I am done here." So Alvin waited patiently for about an hour by this point he was starting to hallucinate from the rad scorpion venom. Doc Death waltzed up to Alvin and diagnosed him right then and there with rad scorpion poison. Doc Death said "well damn boy I hope you have that rad scorpions venom sack because I may not be able to help you out." Alvin held up the very end of the rad scorpions stinger and handed it over to Doc Death. Doc Death laughed maniacly and said "I'll have an anti-venom whipped up for you in a second just try to stay alive for the next few minutes it won't take too terribly long." Two Hours passed Doc Death handed him a milky substance incased in an old whiskey bottle. Doc Death said, "Drink up you damn fool. I want the rest of it." Alvin drank the vaguely bad tasting anti-venom and handed the bottle back to Doc Death who proceded to finish it off and burp rather loudly. "Hell yeah thats the stuff!", exclaimed Doc Death. Alvin then left to explore this new place refered to as Waco.
The rest of the party that remained traveled north east following hoove pints left by Brahim they were only 6 hours old and the sun was starting to rise in the distance. Totz noticed the outlines of human shapes in the distance and ran as fast as the could to get to them. Screaming at the top of their lungs they got the peoples attention and they stopped. Upon arriving they noticed that were twelve strangers each armed with either a rifle or a shot gun further past them they noticed eight others that weren't armed and they were chained together by their hands and feet. Not liking where this was going Ok and Totz started backing away. The Head of the mysterious group of people said "Oh no. You not fucking going anywhere you fucking tribals drop the spear or prepare to be sodomized by hot 12 gauge death!" Ok tried to run and was struck in the head by one of the other peoples rifle butts. Totz surrender and allowed himself to be manacled. Before they set off again the leader said, "you'll sell good to Lawrence when we reach Waco. Just don't try anything cute or we'll kill you! Got it retard!" Totz nodded his head and said, "Me and Ok stung by rad scorpion. Me no feel good." The head slaver said, "Well tough shit tatoo face lemme know when you have something intelligent to say. Oh wait you dont. SO shut the fuck up you'll get medical attention when we get to Waco."
That was the end of the session that day anyways lack of team work and common sense will continue sometime later. In Chronicles of Stupid PART 2.
Yup so merry christmas and enjoy the wacky vigil!
Well Hell...
After everyone I know bugging me to join here I am in Elf Town the only problem I see so far is the no one has came to bug me. Anyways I will be posting one of my stories called Chronicles of Stupid. It is a post apocalyptic short about a group of tribals that venture out into the wastes for some serious ASSHATTERY. It consist of six parts which will be posted one after another in Biweekly fashion. There is harsh language in it so if you don't like the words of curse then avert your gaze from it but if you have balls, are brave or just really don't care read it.