Two funny bits I found on "The Best of Craigslist" Section on Craigslist.com. These are actual posts on craigslist.com.

I work at Tullys, you work at Starbucks, it could never work

We're from two different worlds, you and I. I work at Tullys, you work at Starbucks. It could never work out. Our lives are just too different. You guys make 'frappacinos', we make 'spins'. Your coffee is dark italian roast, while ours is a medium dark city roast. You guys have the whole green thing going. We're apples and oranges babe, oil and water. But, I admit, when I see you pulling shots from your La Marzocco, I think for a moment, maybe, just maybe, it could work. Then I realize I'm a fool. What brand of double tall non-fat hazelnut latte extra hot no foam would our children drink? No, it's better that we stay within our seperate worlds. I'll date nice Tullys girls, you'll find a great Starbucks guy, we'll both be happier this way. Let's save ourselves the heartache.


Dear Mom, Things You Never Knew

mom, i told myself that when i was old enough to not be afraid of your reaction, i'd tell you all the shitty things i did as a child and teenager (even if thy are inconsequential now). i always felt really bad about lying about certain things and i want to come clean. so here's ten things you never would have found out, and probably would never want to know.

1. when i was three and i got tired of waiting for you to be ready to go to the circus. i put the car in neutral and rolled down the driveway through the garage door. for the longest time, i swore that i was traumatized by the event, even going so far as refusing to be left in a car alone until i was 12. in all honesty, it was the most exciting ride of my life and my first clear memory. and you know my affinity for birch beer comes from that day... when you went over to the neighbor's house with me because they saw me crash into the garage. they gave me birch beer and i've loved it ever since.

2. i was pretty young and had just learned about calling and harassing the operator. i called maybe 10 times in a row, whispered "fuck you" and hung up. when they finally got fed up and called back, saying a young girl had been calling and saying bad things, i convinced you it was your son and you grounded him for a week. it was me.

3. i think i was about 10 or so and i found $54 dollars on the floor in the closet. i thought it had probably been there for a while so i picked it up and stuffed it in my pocket without saying a word. later that evening when you asked me if i'd seen money on the floor anywhere, i was lying when i said no. that money kept me in candy for weeks. yummmmm.

4. for several years in high school my friends and i would skip school and come to our house. you always took lunch at the same time, so we would go out to the back yard and hang out in the room under the garage and bake for an hour. i cannot tell you how many times we did this. sometimes the dog would be out on the run and be trying so hard, yapping away to let you know we were in there, but you never picked up on it.

5. you know that guy i dated that you begged me repeatedly never to see again? well one night when you slept at your boyfriends, he stayed the night. my brother swore not to tell you and then told nana. i convinced both you and nana that he was lying, when in fact, i was lying. being the golden child sure had its advantages.

6. you know that time i called and left a message saying that a friend of mine needed me and i had to spend the night at her place so i wouldn't be home? well, that morning i buried my school books in the back of my closet and packed some clothes. i went to the train station and caught an amtrak to boston to meet a guy i had met on the internet. in reality, i stayed at a cheap hotel with a guy who very well may have meant to do me harm. thankfully, i turned out OK. man, i should have been an actress i played that one so well. you even wrote me an absence note for school.

7. you know that guy that i said i met in the mall while he was visiting nyc with some of his navy buddies and he stayed at our house for two nights? i didn't meet him in the mall, i met him online. he was a really nice guy though, unlike the creep visiting boston.

8. remember when i was 17 and flew to seattle to meet all those people off the internet that i said were just friends? they weren't. we had a big, week-long orgy and it was great! just kidding. most of them were (and still are) pretty good friends. except for the guy i stayed with for the week, i thought i was in love with him but i really just wanted a fantasy to believe in. good thing i figured that out BEFORE i ran away.

9. and california... oh my god. you have no clue. you're first big "mommy" act ever was to give me a copy of your platinum card when i went out there for a year of school. this was to be used for food, electricity, books, rent, and transportation. food = going to the close-out grocery store and buying ridiculous amounts of alcohol and cigarettes. i lived off cheap frozen pizzas, hot pockets, and taquitos in order to keep costs down and avoid suspicion. and you bought a lot of books. for classes i didn't take. you know the old gas card scam? used sparingly it works wonders at the college bookstore. i feel really, really shitty about this because for all practical purposes i was definitely old enough to know better, even if i was pretty desperate for cash.

10. you were so dead set against me moving out after i got a job. i lied to you about how much my rent was so that i wouldn't have to listen to you bitch about how much money i could save if i stayed home.

Mom, you're awesome. I know we've had our differences (huge at times) but really, your the only mom I've got and you did your best raising two kids on your own. I didn't always make that easy for you, and lacked the insight to see how hard you tried every day to do the best you could for us, while still living your own life. I love you. And if I had it to do all over again, I wouldn't change a damn thing. OK except maybe the book scam... that's just so fucking low.

I'm bored in Business Tech...therefore I do quizes....

Recipie for me=
3 parts Delight
2 parts Warmth
1 part Intellect

Splash of Prosperity

Finish off with an olive
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am 20% Shy

You aren't shy at all, in fact, you're quite outgoing.
You are comfortable in almost any social situation, no matter how awkward or difficult it may be.
You can make conversation easily, and you know how to focus on other people.
If anything, you're the type of person who can put someone shy at ease.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am a Natural Flirt

Believe it or not, you're a really effective flirt.
And you're so good, you hardly notice that you're flirting.
Your attitude and confidence make you a natural flirt.
And the fact that you don't know it is just that more attractive!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Apperently I Make a Great First Impression

You can handle almost any social situation with grace, even the tricky ones.
Strangers often find you charming and interesting. You are often remembered fondly.
Even if you're not naturally outgoing, you can make conversation with anyone if you need to.

Whether you were born this way or had to work to get here, you are definitely charismatic.
You're popular and well liked. People definitely look forward to being around you.
Your social connections bring you a full and rich life. You understand how important it is to make a lasting impression.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And Lastly I'm an Athiest

God? No thanks. You're not buying into any religion.
They're all bunk to you. You rather focus on what you know is true.
You may be a passive non-believer or a rabid atheist activist.
But one thing is for sure... no one's going to make you go to church!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well there you go the boredom of my mind in the middle of Tech and nothing to do but use a computer....I hate these little quiz things, they are inaccruate, based off of a chaos generater I think, and five to ten questions can't sum up even the most basic human ideal, function, or belief

I seem to be posting quite a bit tonight. Eh. These are some songs my father and I are working on do to us wanting to play together. Some are songs he wrote back in the day and I am helping him work them out while others are ones we are co-writting. They are all Irish tunes with a bit of rock, jazz/blues, and with my influences of regge, punk, funk, and poetic rhyme. Also a whole lot of Blarney! Also want to get my song writting back up and going again so tell me what you think.

It's The Devil In Me (Imagine a carnival-like droning from the accordian and no other instruments with this song)

O help me I think I'm falling
In_to_Hell_again
My head is still a burnin' and I'm goin'
Round and round again                (Chorus)
O help me I think I just fell in_to_Hell_again
Now I know for sure thats its the devil in a me

(Chorus)

Well I had this offal dream
I couldn't even scream
I was too drunk to walk
I couldn't even talk
I could see stars that night
Must have been in a fight
If I could only see
It's the devil in me

I heard this knock at the door
Couldn't get up off the floor
There must be someone there
But sure I really don't care
Maybe they will go away
I'll start a brand new day
Thats what we all have said
It's the devil in me

(Chorus)

I'm going up and then comin' back down again
Moving round and round
Can't you see that I've found
Another sound and town
I feel really fine, twice more around
And I'm homeward bound

I still have those massive scars
From drinking in sleezy bars
I can still see those offal stars
The night I went to planet Mars
while driving some fancy cars
We thought were really ours
Know I now for sure it's
The devil in me

***This song is both a description of the life of an alchohalic musician as well as what life is like as a musician in general. Also it is my da's trophy for defeating his alchohalism. This is a final master peice and I don't care what people think Da and I did a fucking amazing job.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm Running Away (This is more of a fast paced fun song. Imagine a little kids nursery beat with a little guitar stumming)

I'm running away and never comming back again
I don't care if you never try to find me a      (Chorus)
I'm running away and never comming back again
I don't care if you never come and look for me!

(Music starts playing)

Intruduction: (Using a little kids voice)
  I don't like my school and everbody hates me. There's big fat Freddy and Little Jimmy. Homework to do every night and I get big F's from my teacher. I can't take it anymore! I think I'm gonna run away and never go to school!

(Chorus)

I have found a nice wee place and it's so warm and cheerful here
There's animals and clowns and thrills and people people riding elephants
Sure you can't see me I'm so happy playing away in this big tent
I sell my popcorn to the crowd and I'm never comming home!

(Chorus)

I am living in a bus with lots of little monkey friends
There's me and Gus and Franky's tusks and Babba chasing both of us
We do our tricks and fetch some sticks its so great I just can't wait
To do it all again and I'm never comming home!

(Chorus)

Here I am in a diffrent town with crowds of people running around
Our costume room has flying baloons were all such fools
There is no school I only wish that you could save me
Running away just doesn't pay I never want to roam again
I really don't want to stay

(Hold)"O Mammy I want to come home!"

***This was written one day while Da and I were thinking and talking about the sense of home and no matter how badly you want to leave, or how far you go. You will always want to come home. I thought explaining this from a little boys perspective would make it a good fun song let alone make the point well because everyone at one point or another when they were little wanted to run away.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Puttin' On The Squeeeeeze (A party song with strong accordian background and a good didly guitar) Anytime it says 'me' you can change it out for 'it' or 'her' anytime, except in the chorus.

Come on and SQUEEEEZZE me
She say to me again and again and again
Please hold me nice and tight
I need to feel those fingers
Up and down from left to right
Come on now and SQUEEEEZZE me         (Chorus)
She says until the morning light
Please hold me nice and tight
Were gonna keep playing this thing all night
Until we get it right!

(1)
You can sqeeze me in the ally
""  ""  ""  "" "" "" park
""  ""  ""  "" "" "" morning time
Or squeeze me after dark
You can take her to the beach
In her fancy leather case
Can damn near squeeze her keys
In any party place

(2)
Some nights she's very heavy
And some nights she's rather light
Some nights I can't even find the thing
She's the story of my life!
But when we're together now
On goes the lights
I push and pull
And scream and shout
Then everythings alright

(Chorus)

So welcome to Heaven here's your harp
And a nice guitar for you
But welcome to Hell
Fight your accordian
It will make you turn black and blue
It grabs you around the throat
Then it beats your back too
It feels so good when you git it on
It wants to be next to you

(4)
It pinches me in the legs
And it has ruined all my good clothes
It disturbs the neighbors
And the cat and wakes the dead lord knows
I have this fear that it will go in and never come out again
It makes me laugh and it makes me cry
It's my ACCORDIAN!!!!!!

(5)
There's buttons here and buttons there
Buttons everywhere
What are they for I wonder
But nobody knows for sure
For me I honestly believe
That himself the Devil put them there
Just to confuse the hell out of me
It enought to make you swear!

1 again + Chorus that fades

***This is my first try at writting a song in a long time. Its to honor my fathers accordian that he has had since he was sixteen. Based off of all the stories he has told me about the crazy times they have had together I tried to write about what it is to play one, loving so much it makes your heart explode when you play it right to when you want to crush the damned thing.

This poem is a work in progress, which is why it is up here rather than in my house. Would love feedback.

Mesmerizing
The world seems maximizing
The people prophacizing
Wars pulverizing
Darkness emasculating
Men
With their power
Money
Weapons
And hungerious greed
Are terrifingly feminizing
I find this all mesmerizing

A passage from one of Salman Rushdie's books. Read it and really think about it. He is one of the most inciteful people on the planet. It will blow your mind if you understand it.

"For a long time I have believed...in a fourth function of Outsidedness - that in every generation there are a few souls, call them lucky or cursed, who are simply born not to belong, who come into the world semi-detached if you like, without strong affiliation with family or location or nation or race; that there may even be millions, billions of such souls as many non-belongers as belongers perhaps, that; in sum, the phenomenon may be as "natural" a manifestation of human nature as its opposite, but one that has been mostly frustrated, throughout human history, by lack of opportunity. And not only by that; for those who value stability, who fear transience, uncertainty, change, have erected a powerful system of stigmas and taboos against rootlessness; that disruptive, anti-social force, so that we mostly conform, we pretend to be motivated by loyalties and solidarities we do not really feel, we hide our secret identities beneath the false skins of those identities which bear the belongers' seal of approval. But the truth leaks out in our dreams; alone in our beds (because we are all alone at night, even if we do not sleep by ourselves), we soar, we fly, we flee. And in the waking dreams our societies permit, in our myths, our arts, our songs, we celebrate the non-belongers, the different ones, the outlaws, the freaks."

                   ~~~Salman Rushdie~~~

Think about it!

I saw this thing on "Best of Craigslist" it is a REAL craigslist posting...its fucking hilarious!!!

Instructions: Please answer the questions below as directed in each section. You will be marked for grammar, spelling, cleverness, creativity and boob-size. Please keep in mind that while this is not an application for a job, your performance on this test will be a reflection of your ability to achieve certain positions once out in the real world. When the clock strikes the hour, you may begin. You have sixty minutes to complete the test.


Section One: Multiple Choice (Answer All, 5 points)

When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.

Q1. Six months into our relationship, I go away to a tropical location with my family for a week over Christmas. This vacation was planned as a family event two years prior to meeting you. This is:
a) A great opportunity to get some things done without me around.
b) A great opportunity to attempt to sleep with my college roommate and/or my boss.
c) A sign that you are probably just a casual thing that I could toss aside at any given moment despite the fact I bought you probably the most thoughtful gift you've ever received and written you a letter for every day that I'll be gone, inciting you to 'Go on the Defensive.'
d) Occasion to have a sexy dinner at home the night before I leave, and a mini 'welcome home' party when I get back that’s guest list is just you, me, a bottle of wine and a pack of condoms.

Q2. We've talked every night for eight days (not including the dinner/opera show I took you to on Saturday night that was followed by possibly your worst performance in bed ever, or the Monday night that I came over and we spent the evening making Rachel Ray recipes and watching Heroes followed by the best oral sex I've ever given you), with conversation time averaging about an hour per night. On a Thursday night, when on a deadline, I express a need to get off the phone so I can finish some work and go to bed at a reasonable hour. You:
a) Express your feelings of devotion in three words or less, then and quickly say goodbye after confirming plans for tomorrow night are still on.
b) Say goodbye, but then immediately begin talking about something that we hadn't discussed as thoroughly as is scientifically, legally or religiously possible two nights prior.
c) Take that as a sign that I'm abandoning you, and begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry.
d) Say goodbye, but manage to do it with such menace and venom that I stay on the phone for another three silence filled hours, broken only by fits of gentle weeping and suicide threats.

Q3. I'm throwing change at your cleavage, which is readily on display in that loose fitting tank top you wear around my place on Sundays after brunch. Do you:
a) Wing the largest of the coins at my head, with an evil glare and then refuse to speak to me for the rest of the day.
b) Encourage my behavior, and allow me to purchase Afternoon Delights from you at discount prices.
c) Cry.
d) Cry and pick a fight with me, taking my actions as a total lack of respect for you and then begin to point out that because of it I have commitment issues, that you're clearly not my priority, and then cry some more.


Q4. We're having a fight. You:
a) Throw me out of your apartment, then thirty minutes later send 17 texts and attempt to call 13 times in the space of six minutes.
b) Give me space when the discussion gets too heated for rational thought, and redress your complaints in a calm manner when we've both had a chance to cool down.
c) Flip me the bird.
d) Wail on my junk.
e) both c and d
f) realize that the fight is about nothing, and begin creating fictional problems and make wild accusations about my obsession with material goods and having a wandering eye.
g) f, then d, then c.

Q5. I play [video games OR tabletop gaming OR fantasy football]. You:
a) Want to join in, because it looks like hella fun.
b) Leave me to it, in the hopes that I'll leave you a few things to participate in on your own.
c) Attempt to get me to quit, and use tactics like nagging, vandalism and emotional sabotage as an effective campaign against what you call my 'nerdy addiction.'
d) c, but also include deriding me to your friends.


Section Two: True or False (Answer All, 10 points)

When submitting answers via email, please copy and paste the question and then your answer selection beside it.

Q1. Rationale and Reason are the same thing.

Q2. A cheerleader AND/OR schoolgirl outfit is a wardrobe must.

Q3. Talking in your 'cute voice' just before you put my balls in my mouth is sexy.

Q4. Learning body language and communication cues is important.

Q5. 'Anchorman' and 'Superbad' are hilarious movies.

Q6. "But it's cute when I do it" should be a legally viable defense.

Q7. Chest hair is gross.

Q8. Bono is probably the most important political figure of our generation.

Q9. Sex is an important part of a relationship, and should be had frequently, often, whenever possible - within moderation, of course.

Q10. A relationship is metaphorically a two way street. So is your butt.


Section Three: Short Essay. (Answer ONE, 5 points)

Please select one of the following questions and answer it as fully as time will allow. Please try and be as descriptive as possible, and where applicable, come up with at least TWO convincing arguments to support your case. Arguments must be backed up with cited evidence, not anecdotal perspective.


Q1. If I was a crime-fighting vigilante by night, what efforts would you make to support my cause about the rising threat of evil in this city?

Q2. Please come up with a convincing game-plan for having me come shopping with you, keeping in mind my retail oriented attention span is about twelve minutes, and I am prone to wandering after flashing lights and shiny things.

Q3. Please argue why you are (do) or are not (do not): 'Down to Earth', 'Have a sense of humor' and 'Laid back'. Bonus if you can include evidence to confirm that you truly do avoid 'head games.'

Please submit answers via the email link provided. Please also keep a copy of this test and your answers to submit to future suitors for reference. Remember to ensure your name, number and bra size are clearly written at the top of your paper, and don't forget to attach a photo (3/4 length or full).

Waltz

Step close
Step away
Step close
Step away
Triple one
Triple two
this waltz we do
Circles and circles
Step close
Feel the heat
Sweat
Love
Passion
Growth
Step away
Feel the wilt
Jealousy
Confusion
Dryness
Cold
Step close
Step away
Triple one
Triple two
Spinin' and wirlin'
Like we do
Around the floor
More and more
less and less
Lost
Then found
Crushed toes
Hightened spirits
Exausted bodies
As the music dies down
To the last slow song
Everyone looks aross the floor
and all I know
Is I love you

Fluttering Light
I'm burnt out
Lost
Tainted by self abuse
I've meandered the streets
I've seen it all
Shootings
Stabbings
Victimizations of all sorts
I've spent every moment
Making life better for others
Then one night
On a screen
I see a caretaker
Who has been through it
Lost that innocence
That I gave away for a thrill
Knows life for the giving
This little fluttering light
Small and blinding
Has made me see
See what I'm made of
What I will be
What I desire
Driven again
A fluttering light is all it took
A Firefly is all it is
Yet
I have found Humane Perfection
I will chase this Firefly
all night and day
Just to be reborn
Again
And again
And again....
                     ~Patrick Nicholas "Simba" Commins

Exomatic Insomnia

With a single choice
Microscopic pins
An entire galaxy can change
With a single choice
Macroscopic bugs
A persons world can change
Under unexplained reasons
We humans have a gift
A special uniqueness
The ability of awareness
Awareness of the power of choice
More so
We control the awareness
And yet
Even though we all have this gift
Most wander the world
In a dream
Of stolid insomnia
               ~Patrick N. Commins

Well here I am, once again, watching the sunrise and set. Watching the cars drive by to work, then watching them come back. Sitting as the songs on birds die away, along with the rest of the existance of sound, leaving me alone till the day begins again. Most people don't wakingly exist during the hours of my waking dreams. I wish more people understood what this was like.

I'm moveing all of my poetry that was in my house to here....to save space I think is the reason.

This is one that is still kind of rough....but I like it so far.

Kennel Hound
I've wandered
Sauntered
Ran with my tail between my legs
I've grown
Been shown
And Thrown to the curb
People have owned me
Have fed me
Have pet me
I've been out on my own
All alone
Torn to bone
Teeth, claws, and paws
I've been beaten
Malnurished
And Abused
I've tried to be fostered
I was Locked in
No one pet me
No one fed me
No one played with me
Not even a ball
I've begged before
Those cold streets
Still make me shake
Now as you look into this cage
Cement floor
And my metal dish
Would you...please
Adopt me?
  ~Patrick Commins~

Yes, yes a few more songs by Flowbots.

Anne Braden
From the color of the faces in sunday's songs
To the hatred they raised all the youngsters on
Once upon a time in this country long ago
She knew there was something wrong
Because the song said yellow, red, black, and white
Everyone precious in the path of christ
But what about the daughter of the woman cleaning their house
Wasnt she a child they were singing about
And if jesus loves us black or white skin
Why didn't her white mother invite them in?
When did it become a room for no blacks to step in?
How did she already know not to ask the question
Left lasting impressions
Adolescence's comforts gone
She never thought things would ever change
But she always knew there was something wrong

She always knew there was something wrong

Years later she found herself mississippi-bound
To help stop the legalized lynching
Of mr. willie mcgee
But they couldnt stop it
So they thought that theyd talk to the governor
About what happened
And say were tired of being used
As an excuse to kill black men
But the cops wouldnt let em past and
These women they struck em as uppity
So they hauled em all off to jail
And they called it protective custody
Then from her cell she heard her jailers
Grumbling about outsiders
And when she called him out
And said she was from the south they shouted
Why is a nice southern lady
Making trouble for the governor?
She said, i guess im not your type of lady
And i guess im not your type of southerner.
But before you call me traitor
Well its plainest just to say
I was a child in mississippi
But im ashamed of it today


Imagine the world that youre standing within
All of your neighbors and family and friends
How would you cope
Facing the fact
The flesh on your hand
Was tainted with sin
She faced it every day
People she saw on a regular basis
People she loved in several cases
People she knew were incredibly racist
It was painful
But she never stopped loving them
Never stopped calling their name
And she never stopped being a southern woman
And she never stopped calling for change
And she saw that her struggle
Was in the tradition
Of ancestors never aware of her
It continues today
The soul of a southerner
Born of the other america

We Are Winning
Rival gangsters sit down to plan an after-school program
A religious fanatic posts footage of an interfaith service project
A group of teenage boys watches a video of a father playing catch with his son
An adult film star paints thumbnail portraits of elderly couples, fully clothed and smiling
A record executive records a demo of his apology
A policeman makes reverse 911 calls instructing residents to take to the streets
A patriot reports for duty
She's wearing an orange jumpsuit and holding a picket sign
She's ashamed of her birthplace
But retreat is not an option


Women and children
Frontline
Logon
Tune in
Stand and be counted
Wounded
Stationed
In the belly of the vulture
Watch your back
Theres no civilians
Women children
Frontline
Listen
Consider this a distant early warning
The fires imminent
Pollution gathering dust particles
Funneling through smokestacks
Airwaves
Bandwidth
Disinformation tube fed
Check the label
Delete the virus
Alert the masses

Butterfly wing crosswinds send black hawks toward hurricane survivors
Roses sprout from empty lots and sidewalk cracks
Pacifist guerrillas move undetected through concrete jungles
New forms are beginning to take shape
Once-occupied minds are activating
People are waking up
The insurgency is alive and well

Rise of the flobots
Portrait of the new american insurgent
Rattle and shake the foundation of the world order
Assembly line consent
Resist
Refuse
Inform
Create
Direct loved ones to the trenches
Suit up
Forge rubble into fortresses
Plaster
Cloth
Aluminum
Broken porcelain
Rusted platinum
Burn bloodstains from decompressed diamonds
Hammer the battlecry into braille-studded armor

We are building up a new world
Do not sit idly by
Do not remain neutral
Do not rely on this broadcast alone
We are only as strong as our signal
There is a war going on for your mind
If you are thinking you are winning
Resistance is victory
Defeat is impossible
Your weapons are already in hand
Reach within you and find the means by which to gain your freedom
Fight with tools
Your fate and that of everyone you know depends on it

There's A War Going On For Your Mind
There's a war going on for your mind
Media mavens mount surgical strikes from trapper keeper collages and online magazine racks
Cover girl cutouts throw up pop-up ads
Infecting victims with silicone shrapnel
Worldwide passenger pigeons deploy paratroopers
Now it's raining pornography
Lovers take shelter
Post-production debutantes pursue you in nascar chariots
They construct ransom letters from biblical passages and bleed mascara into holy water supplies

There's a war going on for your mind
Industry insiders slang test tube babies to corporate crackheads
They flash logos and blast ghettos
Their embroidered neckties say "stop snitchin'"
Conscious rappers and whistleblowers get stitches made of acupuncture needles and marionette strings

There is a war going on for your mind
Professional wrestlers and vice presidents want you to believe them
The desert sky is their bluescreen
They superimpose explosions
They shout at you
"Pay no attention to the men behind the barbed curtain
Nor the craters beneath the draped flags
Those hoods are there for your protection
And meteors these days are the size of corpses

There's a war going on for your mind
We are the insurgents

Yes again more lyrics from the Flobots. I encourage their messege more and more every damn day.

Fight WIth Tools
echo echo one-nine
hear the call through fault lines
smoke signals old rhymes
shorted lights in store signs
spelled in a broken code
find that it is time to
breath build bend and refine you
we sky tenants
give it all but wont give up
radio soul antennas
radio to lift spirits
call sign commando
m.o. is independence
scream till the walls fall,
dissolve all the limits

occupied minds
unemployed skills
desolation
worn out
torn down
just for now thrill seekers
slanging
test tube babies in beakers
where gun blasts pump straight from the speakers
the system where the
poor get poorly paid
to hold the ladder
where the rich get ricocheted
into the stratosphere
and in between people are rushin' like vladimir
with metals to make their status clear
get us out of here

we need heroes
build them
don't put your fist up
fill them
with our hopes and our hearts and our hands
we're the architects of our last stand

there's a war going on for your mind
those who seek to occupy it will stop at nothing
the battlefield is everywhere
there is no sanctuary
there are no civilians
you have two choices
surrender or enlist

what kind of person are you
always the first to argue
or never down to stick your neck out
cause it hurts you far too much
to see your rep suffer
set you up a buffer
well neither is enough for us cut from a tougher brand of duct tape
the propaganda's stuck on us like sock pajamas
spread like a virus
through accepted thoughts and proper manners
but off the cameras
something's simmering across the land
about to bubble up
and knock the lids off of the pots and pans

we are non stop juggernauts
stomp ziggurats
spit manifestos
by terabytes and gigawatts
shock paradigms
give sense to a score
throw thoughts through the sky
activate twenty more
in these high and dry times
expectorate on dogma
pragmatic sycophants
divide and conquer
we build bridges offer
hard work and prosper
as hand made heroes brought to you by no sponsors

all free minds to the front
all free minds to the front
we call upon women
we call upon children
we call upon the handicapped
the infirmed
the week of heart
we need your courage
your dedication
your passion
your commitment
gather up your platinum
melt it down
gather up your gold
melt it down
gather up your bronze
your silver
your aluminum
melt it down
melt it down
melt it down

This song represents one of my core and most powrfull beliefs. This brings me out of every rut. It is written by the Flobots. Its about how ALL human beings, me, you, EVERYONE has INFINATE POTENTAL! I will be posting more of their lyrics soon. I will even probably join their orginization, Street Team.

Handlebars
I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars
I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Look at me, look at me
Hands in the air like it's good to be
Alive, and I'm a famous rapper
Even when the paths're all crookedy
I can show you how to do-si-do
I can show you how to scratch a record
I can take apart the remote control
And I can almost put it back together
I can tie a knot in a cherry stem
I can tell you about Leif Ericson
I know all the words to "De Colores"
And "I'm proud to be an American"

Me and my friend saw a platypus
Me and my friend made a comic book
And guess how long it took
I can do anything that I want cuz, look--

I can keep rhythm with no metronome
No metronome
No metronome
And I can see your face on the telephone
On the telephone
On the telephone

Look at me, look at me
Just called to say that it's good to be
Alive
In such a small world
I'm all curled up with a book to read
I can make money open up a thrift store
I can make a livin off a magazine
I can design an engine sixty four miles to the gallon of gasoline

I can make new antibiotics
I can make computers survive aquatic conditions
I know how to run the business
And I can make you wanna buy a product
Movers, shakers and producers
Me and my friends understand the future
I see the strings that control the system
I can do anything with no assistance

...'Cuz I can lead a nation with a microphone
With a microphone
With a microphone
And I can split the atom of a molecule
Of a molecule
Of a molecule

Look at me, look at me
Drivin' and I won't stop
And it feels so good to be alive and on top
My reach, is global
My tower, secure
My cause, is noble
My power, is pure

I can hand out a million vaccinations
Or let them all die in exasperation
Have'em all healed from the lacerations
Have'em all killed by assassination
I can make anybody go to prison
Just because I don't like'em
And I can do anything with no permission
I have it all under my command because

I can guide a missile by satellite
By satellite
By satellite
And I can hit a target through a telescope
Through a telescope
Through a telescope

And I can end the planet in a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars
I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Here is the begining to our apartments Constitution....we obviously need help..........

Constitution of THE APARTMENT

1. "Residents" have the power to make all final desicions in THE APARTMENT; as well as veto any "Crew Members" choices.

2. All decisions must be agreed upon by ALL "Residents" as well as be written down by the Sribe, if need be, before they come into effect.

3. "Residents" must convine to create/edit "Rules" to this document, add/remove "Crew Members" or "Residents",
along with any and all major desicions pertaining to THE APARTMENT or the livelyhood of "Residents" and "Crew Members".

4. Noted "Crew Members" can make temporary desicions that are needed when there are no residents around to make it. The "Crew Member(s)" that make the desicion have full responisbility for the consequences that ensue from their choice(s). These desicions can be vetoed at any time by any "Resident".

5. Under any circumstances, Anthony Loja and Cory harvey (Paying the most rent) have final say in terms of this document and THE APARTMENT in general. Even over other "Residents"

6. This Constitution is a living document and is viable to change at any time, under the watch and power of the "Residents".

7. A list of "Residents" and their duties within and pertaining to THE APARTMENT, along with those of "Crew Members", will be posted on another document. This other document, titled "Roster", is also a living document and can be changed at anytime through the watch and power of the "Residents".

8. Only "Residents" have the power to give someone a title. A "Crew Member" with a title may suggest possible canidate(s) for an open title slot.

9. The only people who may hold a title are "Residents" and "Crew Members". "Fringe Members" are not capable of holding any title besides that of "Initiate"; which still must be given by the "Residents"

10. "Crew Members" and "Residents" must up hold their title and duties. If they disconitue their duties they can be removed from their title and post through the watch and power of the "Residents".

          -Definitions-
1. THE APARTMENT- the place of living where these rules are believed in and are enforced.

2. "Resident"- A person who lives in THE APARTMENT and is somehow putting in effort/monetary value to THE APARTMENT or the livelyhoods of all other "Residents". ie. If your not giving to the rest of us you get nothing from us. YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE!

3. "Crew Member"- A person who gives time/energy or anything else who doesn't live in THE APARTMENT. A "Crew Member" usually will have duties and other such things.

4. "Fringe Member"- A person who doesn't add to THE APARTMENT in any consitant, or worthwhile, way. If they are givin any Title, unless it is a joke or an "Initiate Title".

5. "Initiate Title"- Someone who wants a try at a title can take it via diplomatic force. Or they can request to become an "Initaite" of the Title and work up the ranks by proving themselves. An "Initiate" has only the power to run basic errands for the "Crew Member" (if one) with the Title. Meanwhile if the Title holder whom the "Initiate" is under is a "Resident" they can do anything that all the "Residents" feel the "Initiate" can do.

5. "rules"- A governing statement that will be enfored by "Residents" and "Crew Members" as well as be respected by visitors to THE APARTMENT. A "Rule" is anything within the Constitution, Roster or anything that the "residents" post somehow. "Rules" must be clear and easily understood.

And finally Our Crew Roster. Which needs to be updated.

-Roster-

Key=
*=This title can be owned by multiple people

NOTE:Any "Resident" can hand off a title temporarily (Agreed upon time by the "Residents") to a, trusted, "Crew Member" whom the "Residents" approve capable. It is then, if something goes wrong, both the "Resident"'s and the trusted "Crew Member"'s responibility. The "Resident" for bad leadership. The "Crew Member" for incompitence. If things go above par both will be praised. The "Resident" for good leadership and management. The "Crew Member" for competence (Possible re-crowning of Title).


"RESIDENTS" 
Anthony#Loja################################################-----------------"Barkeep"
-----To facilitate the traffic and use of Alchohalic substances through THE APARTMENT. Also is incharge of cleaning, atleast mostly, the mess of any alchohalic occurence, with help from the Maid. Is to organize beer runs. The Barkeep should somehow be compensated for any Alchohal the Barkeep buys, the Barkeep should never have to pay fully; unless it is the Barkeeps idea and the Barkeep is the only one involved. In any form of police related issue the Barkeep should be present,
if not running the show.
------------------"Net God"
-----To watch, Keep track of and repair the internet problems. Any computer bullshit, ecspecially internet realated ones. In short, if there is a tech related problem within THE APARTMENT it is the Net God's responibility to deal with. Any costs will be split between the problems owner and the Net God, if not just the problem owner. The Net God should never pay fully, unless dictated by the Net God.
------------------"Chef"*
-----The Chefs job is to cook any and all MEALS within THE APARTMENT. The Chef is NOT responsible for snacks and other random food items. All chefs convine on a decided day and plan out the weeks meal plan, the Chefs shouldn't have to cook more than dinner and bulk 'staying food' for the week ahead. The Chefs and the Maid plan out groceries for the week on the same decided day. The chefs and maid should split the costs of eating on most occasions.

Corey#Harvey################################################
--------------------"Apothocary"
-----To facilitate the traffic of cannabis sativa, E, shrooms, or anyother mind altering substance through THE APARTMENT. Also responisble for the cleaning & maintenence of all & any drug related equipment that may be present. Is to clean up after any drug related incident, with help from the Maid. Must OK all drugs within the house before use. In any form of police related issue the Apothocary should be present, if not the one incharge.
--------------------"Father Time"
-----Keeps track of due dates, bills and anyother important date/time asked to record. Is not to do much more than remind "Residents" and "Crew Members" that something is comming up. Ecspecially the day of. If there is a problem with memory; if it isn't in Father Times books, it wasn't important enough for "Resident(s)" or "Crew Member(S)" to remind Father Time to record it in the first place.

Patrick#Commins#############################################
--------------------"Scribe"
-----To write down all important information. The Scribe is the only one who can change this document, the Constitution,
or anyother document that the Scribe or the "Residents" deem to be writen. Is responisble to keep any and all documents in order and clear to all who needs to read them. Is also responsible for mail comming in and out of THE APARTMENT.
--------------------"Maid"*
-----The Maids main responibility to keep the main areas within THE APARTMENT clean and looking presentable, to the standards of the "Residents". The Maid is NOT responsible for cleaning the "residents" rooms unless otherwise negotiated. The maids other duty is to keep all "residents" with clean clothes, towels and the like. As well as organize shopping lists, shop for groceries, and organize meals with the "Chefs". Lastly, most things on a teens 'chores' list is the Maids responability.
--------------------"Chef"*
-----The Chefs job is to cook any and all MEALS within THE APARTMENT. The Chef is NOT responsible for snacks and other random food items. All chefs convine on a decided day and plan out the weeks meal plan, the Chefs shouldn't have to cook more than dinner and bulk 'staying food' for the week ahead. The Chefs and the Maid plan out groceries for the week on the same decided day. The chefs and maid should split the costs of eating on most occasions.

"CREW MEMBERS"

Ray#Glover##################################################
--------------------"Entertainer"*
-----To be an Entertainer one must have some form of entertaining skill/characteristic that the "Residents" find interesting. An Entertainers duty is to entertain anyone in THE APARTMENT if they can. If there is to be a gathering/party at THE APARTMENT the Entertainer may be asked to use their skill at the gathering/party. If they choose to do so they should be equally compansated, unless otherwise noted by the Entertainer.
--------------------"Apothocary Initiate"
-----The duties of the Initiate Apothocary is to help the Apothocary in anyway the Apothocary needs.

I have decided to post my poetry and random thought up in this diary thing. All the diary is is a damn blog anyway.
I may even post my apartments Constitution here. I'm way to into and inspired by that thing.

Lookin' Round (May change title)
As the worlds spin
Twirlin' in their orbits
Wirlin' round their balls of gas
Swirlin' in their elequent dance
Lit only by strobe lights
We go amongst our fights

Blowing each other way
Each and every day
Leaders on giants shoulders
Like crushing flowers
Stealing candy from babies
Just to feed it to Hades

We go amongst our fights
Our day lit with bomb flare
Enough for Ghangis to have a scare
Up and down our planes soar
Much like the price of a whore
Enough to make the brothers cry to the core

Survival is loosing its lights

All of this and I'm still asked of God
Sodom and Gamorah
His cities of sins and ash
Are our cities of grins and cash
'Nough said
~Patrick N. Commins~