[merihevonen]'s diary

958383  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2007-07-16
Written: (6140 days ago)
953192  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2007-06-28
Written: (6158 days ago)

I'm going to see Egotrippi on the 14th of next month at Tavastia.

I feel like a kid in a candy store.
So much good is happening: seeing Egotrippi live for the first time in my life, the OOTP movie, the last Potter book...
and I still haven't seen the new Pirates movie. I refure to download it, I have too much respect for the movie trilogy to download some handheld crap. I'm going to go see them on theater, or then just wait til they're on dvd. Or just wait until someone downloads a better version of the movie.

and school starts 28th of August.

Tomomorrow I'm going to Turku with my father to see my brother (by train it takes 4 hours to get there).
I've never been there before, so yey. Turku is the "culture city" of Finland supposedly, so it should be interesting going around the city. Knowing my brother we will go through booksstores, cd stores and cafes... :)

I will there for 2 nights I think. Good night and take care of yourselves.

952335  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-06-26
Written: (6160 days ago)
951770  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2007-06-24
Written: (6162 days ago)

No one is ever online at the same time I come here. I guess they just don't want to talk with me.

Not much to say. We're moving. Mom has another date with a guy he met at the dating commutity they talk to each other. This is I think the third date she's been during these past few weeks.


Yeah. That's all for now.
Good night. Take care of yourselves.

Also, go here. Beautiful music -> <3 http://www.myspace.com/aitoegotrippi <3 Rin Tin Tin!

jos etsit kadonnutta aikaa jotain josta jouduit luopumaan
liian usein huomaat ei se totta ollutkaan
ja joku tuskin tietää mitä etsii vailla määrän päätä harhailee
monen vuoden jälkeen ystävälleen kirjoittaa
ne sanat jotka sanomatta jäivät sanat joita ei kai ollutkaan
sanat jotka pettävät kun niitä tarvitaan
ja minä olen miettinyt jo kauan jotain josta sulle kertoisin
vaikka tuskin muistan enää osoitettakaan

sun villakoirasi nimi oli Rin-Tin-Tin
typerä piski joka murisi mulle
hölmöksi tunsin minä itsenikin
vaikka kaikesta halusin puhua sulle
mä vain häntääni heilutin

olen hävittänyt kaiken joka sinusta mua muistuttaa
olen myynyt levyt joita silloin kuuntelin
ne levyt usein radiossa soivat tai ne voivat olla muitakin
lähes kaiken sinusta jo melkein unohdin

sun villakoirasi nimi oli Rin-Tin-Tin...

sinä hymyiletkö vielä sinä suuteletko vielä niin
että suudellessa olin mennä tainnoksiin
ja minä olen olemassa vielä minä vieläkin sua muistelen
vaikka monta vuotta sitten jouduin naimisiin

sun villakoirasi nimi oli Rin-Tin-Tin...

948959  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-06-16
Written: (6170 days ago)

Everyone needs to see Michael Moore's new movie Sicko. See it. I mean it.

947903  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-06-13
Written: (6173 days ago)

Mom has apparently "quite fallen" for this guy at the online dating community where she spends hours every night.
With someone called Sormu. And he's apprently 6 years older than mom is.

I still don't know how to react to it.



By the way, no one should ever see 'Pride and Prejudice'. I really can't believe Keira Knightley got a Oscar nomination for it.

Also, for the past weeks mom and I have been short on cash.
We've had to really think what to buy, not to buy any useless extra stuff.

I can't buy pizza :(



ps. hmm. "community where she spends hours every night", does that remind you of anyone? :P

947076  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2007-06-10
Written: (6176 days ago)



I've had internet problems. My brother's friend Mikko came here to fix it (as you can see me writing this now).


So now to more important things that have happened. For 2 days my darling, kultapieni, Elvis... was gone. And I had no idea where he had gone. On Monday afternoon Elvis jumped out of the window. It took us about a half an hour to realize he wasn't at home. First, we just thought he was sleeping somewhere we couldn't see him (like he sometimes does, when he gets sick of us stupid humans). So wesearched everywhere, under every bed, closet, table. He was nowhere to be seen. Mette was just calmly sunbathing on the balcony during our search, so I thought shouldn't he be panicking where his brother was. Apparently not. 

Well after about half on hour or hour of searching the house through and checking the upstairs as well, since he once got out accidentally to one floor up, since he just can't help his curiosity...

Then, we saw that my window was bit open. That's where we thought he jumped. I felt so guilty because it was my window.

We were all feeling hopeless and worrying about him. The worst feeling was the fact that we didn't know where he was or what had happened to him, was he dead or alive, run over by a car or eaten by another animal... We went through the forest on our backyard as many times as possible and I spread Lost-flyers everywhere...

Those two days were the most saddest, desperate... just plain simple stupidest feeling... I've ever felt.



Then came Wednesday evening. It was maybe 10 minutes after 6 pm, mom and I were going to go to the library since our internet didn't work and mom wanted to talk to her online dating-friends.
We were about to leave to the library and going out of the door, but then I realized I didn't have my cellphone with me, and I had to have it with me all time in case someone would call me about whether someone had seen Elvis.
I found my cellphone and saw that someone had called me, and it was a number that I didn't recognize.
I called the number. Then a woman with a Russian accent said that he had just been walking outside with her two sons and had seen a scared animal is a small hole in the ground, very close to where I live. We agreed to meet outside, so I hurried outside to meet her.

She led me to the hole and there was an animal on the bottom of the hole. When I got closer, I saw that it was Elvis. I can't explain the feeling of happiness I felt, my heart "leaped" so to speak.
He moved a bit closer after seeing me, but he was still too far for me to touch him, so I had to go down in the hole and get him. He was shivering a bit, I just hugged him and was just glad to hold him again.
My mom hugged the woman we were both ready to dance from happiness (so to speak). I gave Elvis to mom, so that I could get up from the hole better without dropping Elvis from my lap.
When I got up, I hugged the woman excitedly and practically screamed "THANK YOU!!!" in her ears.

He was alive, that's all that mattered. No injuries, he was just hungry.
Elvis has been eating a lot, which is only natural...
Mette is picky when it comes to food. But Pete and Elvis eat almost anything.


When we took him back home, Mette was like he had never been gone. Weird cat.
Pete had been clearly worried about Elvis and had noticed his little brother's absense.
We had taken him and Mette with us to the backyard, searching Elvis, going through the forest.

All window's are closed now and they have their collars on.

So that's it. Happy ending. It's been an exhausting week.
I saw few very disturbing nightmares when Elvis was lost. Hopefully I'll be able to sleep better from now on.


One of the nightmares I saw was that Elvis hadn't jumped out of the window at all, but instead, we found him in a closet... and he had... choked to death since he didn't have any air there. 



Last night's dream I can't remember, but it was pretty... let's say, heavy to wake up from.


So what else is happening in my life?

My mother started online dating. She has a date today with a guy named Jore she met at that community.
I really don't know how to react.





 

944653  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-06-02
Written: (6184 days ago)

All I can say is... HOLY CRAP! ^____^
I can't wait to hear the new album.
I really hope this isn't the last album. Even though Harri Mänty left the band... :(


http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&amp;friendID=38505447&blogID=271302887&amp;MyToken=ca6a6b21-e19a-4b95-9a37-d21ec0d2ce65

941953  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-05-23
Written: (6194 days ago)

http://www.hs.fi/kaupunki/artikkeli/1135227435346

*giggles*

A 2,5 metre high vagina?!

That's an artwork of a Finnish artist... XD

940890  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-05-19
Written: (6198 days ago)

I have completely fallen in love with the Swedish language.

Great Swedish bands I recommend:
-Moneybrother
-Håkan Hellström
-Magnus Carlson
-Kent
-<3Weeping Willows<3


also, I really want to go to Stockholm this summer.



http://youtube.com/watch?v=WZkFYfCor2o&;mode=related&amp;search= <3


What do you know about the moon's light
before it has struck you broken under it
And what do you know about the dawn
before you meet every morning with sleepless eyes

What do you know about the sun
before someone has shut all the lights
And what do you know about that you don't want to wake up anymore
You'll see your youth rot before you

And what do you know about love
before you hated it in vain
And what do you know about that the heart can burn
for love which can never die
but not to live for either

She will never come back
She will never come back

It's my own fault
what happened to my heart
I've always known that you wouldn't stay
I'd rather be alone than happy with someone else

Spread gasoline over the sunset,
tear down the whole city
Throw away the only sea to the horizon
Silence the music
She will never come back here again

940013  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-05-16
Written: (6201 days ago)

I didn't do my homework, but I ate candy and drank one cider.

Wuhuu, big rebel me.

and there was a lot of nakedness... xp

939682  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-05-15
Written: (6202 days ago)

Mom left to Turku to see my brother and she'll be home tomorrow.

So that means I am home alone (well, with Pete and the cats, of course).
Wuhuu! I can do whatever I want.
Time to party, listen music loud, drink cider, eat lots of unhealthy food....
and walk around naked...

Blah... I'm not like that. I'm just boring me. *sighs*
What to do? What to do?

Oh yeah, I got a Swedish essay to write on Wednesday's class.
I have to do my homework >_> 

Now that's very rebel-y... >_<

939610  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-05-15
Written: (6202 days ago)

<img:http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n243/PockyTeeth/mysecret.jpg>
I found this picture from http://community.livejournal.com/ljsecret/



Yesterday I came online and I wrote quite a long entry here... and then, I pressed the wrong button and whooosh - all gone. I was frustrated and left. I wrote about hockey and the eurovisions, the Weeping Willows gig... All that, whoosh, gone.

Yesterday was the Canada-Finland game. Well, no point sulking about it, we played a good tournament.
We beat USA and Russia. We had confidence - The Finnish Lions were amazing. Then came the last game... and our confidence went down the drain when Canada started making goals early in the game, and then we became frustrated as we always become when we can't get the puck to the net... Finland's 'last game curse' keeps going...

Canada just played better. I'm not going to be a sore loser. I'm at least going to try to act somewhat maturely.
Sure, yesterday I was pretty shaken up afterwards... I really believed we were going to win!
So many years of losing, coming second, third and fourth...
'Silver medal is not a shame' they say.
Like Peltonen said after the game, something along the lines of "We came here for the gold and we lost. No one remembers the losers."
I'd just really like to know what it feels... you know, to win gold. 
I'm too young to remember 1995.
Finland has one gold medal. ONE. Canada has like, what? 20?


Canada is just that good. They played a great game.
I've always admired the Candian team, but this year... I didn't expect players like them. Way to go, Yzerman. You chose a great team.

So, congratulations, Canada. Enjoy your victory. You deserve it.
Someday we'll win you. And Sweden too.

938470  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2007-05-10
Written: (6207 days ago)

I'm going to see Swedish poprock band Weeping Willows tonight at Tavastia.
This is my first gig during my life so I'm rather excited.


------


To me, this is the most beautiful song ever made.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=1hrAUKA2Ss8&;mode=related&amp;search=
Kent: Utan Dina Andetag


Without Your Breath

I know you're asleep
feel the heat from your skin
just the smell makes me weak
but I don't dare to wake you now

I would give you
everything you want
but only when you don't hear
I dare to say so

I cannot even walk
without your air in my lungs
I cannot even stand
when you're not watching
and transparent like grey
is what I'll be like
without your breath

My watch has stopped
under your eyelids
the dreams pass by
you're light as a feather inside

And without a sound
my heart in your hand
I've lost my speech
it remains in your hair

I cannot even walk
without your air in my lungs
I cannot even stand
when you're not watching
colourless like a tear
is what I'll be like
without your breath

I cannot even walk
without your air in my lungs
I cannot even stand
if you're not watching
and transparent like grey
what would I be like
without your breath

What would I be like
without your breath?





937086  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2007-05-06
Written: (6211 days ago)
Next in thread: 937252

Things are a bit crazy at the moment. I had to come here and put these thoughts into words.

I'm sorry for the curse words. It's just my way of dealing with this thing.



I feel so... argh. I'm just so sick of this whole thing happening. And most of all, I hate how this is affecting my mother. She's just so tired and exhausted to argue about it. She's now taking a nap. Mari's coming here tonight. We're wathcing the Finland-Sweden match and then this movie Beowulf & Grendel and then she's spending the night here. Tomorrow I have school in the evening and my mom's going to see a lawyer.

So, I will now start explaining all that has happened. All this, during just few days...
Last Saturday, my mother got a text message from my stepfather Kari. He was in Puerto de la Cruz, in the Tenererife.
Since it was written with weird shortcuts my mother didn't undestand the message. He said he was coming back. That's all she understood.

Now... and then came Sunday morning... around 5 am. My mother had woken at 4 am and I had been awake most of the night because I had slept most of the previous day and then woke up at 10 pm.
So, then... my mother's cellphone got a beeb, meaning a new text message.
It said "I'm I'm the airport now, can you came pick me up?"
Well this was a surprise because my mother and Kari had DIVORCED. It was his idea to leave in the first place, totally unplanned, to a completely another country he knew nothing about. He just left, just like that! All the money he got from selling his 300 cd collection, all the money he had... all went to the airplane ticket. And then he just goes to another courntry to live without any money. He only had his bag with his coin collection and a laptop given to him by some friend of his... that idiot wasn't able to even OPEN the laptop, goddammit...

So... like I was saying, my mother got a text message from Kari. Mom then decided to call him, confused about the text message, wanting to find out what his intentions were.

Well... to put it shortly, he had the assumption that now that he was back in Finland he was of course coming back to live here... like he was just on holiday.

Today I found out why he came back so soon. It's because he had so little money, his email friend who lived there didn't accept him he didn't get his apartment. Also, he lost his passport. He had to call his mother and brother to mail him money for the hotel bill. His brother was the one who got him the flight back.

He claims it's his right to live here till the middle of August when the divorce is final.

Today Mom and I were at Citymarket... Hannu called her, passing on a message from Kari. He said that Kari would like to go to our cabin on Pornainen. The answer is a strict no to that one. It's not only my mother's cabin, it's also the rest of my family's inheritance, built by my grandfather himself. LIKE HELL is he going there. Over my dead body, goddammit.

He said that he has some paper that says he has the right to live here till the end of August...

Fuck you, Kari. The hell you have any fucking "right" to live here anymore.
He said that he's going to call the police tonight and then they're going to come knocking our door tonight. *laughs*
Well then my mother is going to call the cops as well. It's our apartment, not his anymore. We decide who lives and doesn't live here.

I hate how this is affecting my mother. I hate it. I wish I could just help her somehow. I hug her everyday nowadays. But it doesn't seem to be enough... She calls her sister and my godmother when she needs someone to talk to. I'm so glad for that. I try to talk to her about it as well, but I know a part of her wants me to step back on certain things... like if I know too much, if I get too close, I'll be traumatized, or something. This is the second divorce during my life.

I just want my mom to be happy.

935584  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-05-01
Written: (6216 days ago)

Good morning.

some updates worth mentioning:
Mom forgot to pay the internet bill. Just in case you were wondering why you haven't seen me on Elftown in about week and a half.
Besides that, mom and I have been just cleaning the house.
Janne (my brother) was here last weekend. He helped with the messy look of our home.
Pete's fur has been trimmed. He looks like a dalmatian now. O_o

not so important updates:
I have now read the two newest Harry Potter books. I can't wait for the Potter movie. As well as the Pirates 3 and Spiderman 3.
The Eurovisions are coming... and if you don't know by now, this year it's here in Hki.
I'm going to see Weeping Willows (Swedish pop/rock band, Sweden's second best band) this month.
Wuhuu, just nine days left.


I hope you are all fine. Now that I got my internet back, I'll catch up on everything I've missed.


-----------
http://youtube.com/watch?v=doc1eqstMQQ

928455  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2007-04-09
Written: (6238 days ago)

I did a really stupid thing today...



I just came home from seeing Mari. Her birthday was on the 7th, so that was our sort of celebrating it together.
We talked and laughed... caught up on things that had happened since the last time we met.

Well anyway, forward with the story. To the stupid thing I did.

After eating she said she needed to smoke a cigarette so we went to the railway station.
She lit her cigarette and I watched her smoke.

I've never smoked in my life. Ever.
I've always wondered why people enjoy it so much... I mean, the smell is disgusting. Why are people so addicted smoking?


As I watched Mari smoke, then, I had the brilliant idea to want to know what it's like. I have said it to Mari before a few times already that once in my life I would like to smoke one cigarette... but never before have I had the guts to ask.
So then and there, I just thought 'To hell with it, why not just try it once?'
Well, I asked Mari if I can try it and she gave it to me with a giggling look at me of what was to happen. 
Well... I took the cigarette in my fingers and since I had never smoked before I asked what do I do now.
Mari said 'Just inhale it for a second or two'
Well I put the cigarette in my lips and inhaled... I reacted to the taste and smell of it by literally coughing my lungs out and repeating vittu (=fuck) and every other curseword that I could think of about 50 times and coughing over and again.... My eyes became watery and I had to sit on the cold ground to calm myself. Mari was pretty much laughing at my reaction the whole time. It took about 5-10 minutes alltogether for the coughing to stop...

And now I've had a headache since it. And my heart's beating fast...
I was scared how fast it was going, my heartbeat has never been so quick.

I'm thinking about going to take a shower to try to calm myself.



Not a smart thing to do. My lungs have now lost their virginity. 
927670  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-04-07
Written: (6240 days ago)

For some reason I thought this wouldn't happen.
Yesterday I asked him to make this easier for all of us and not to drink.

I actually thought that he'd be sober all week and then he'd leave to Puerto de la Cruz and be out of our lives forever...

I don't know why I am surprised.
Kari came home few minutes ago from the grocery store.
With 3 plastic bags full of beer.


*Sighs*
6 days left. Just 6 days.
I just have to stand him for 6 days anymore...

927366  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2007-04-06
Written: (6241 days ago)

I woke up today around noon. I surfed online for about an hour then watched some Monty Python's Flying Circus.

Then around 4 or 5 pm my stepfather came knocking on my door. He said he was going to make pancakes. I said okay, fine, trying to get him to leave. He kept going on and on about it, he just wouldn't go away. I said three times to close the door, but he just ignored me. Then getting sick of hearing his voice, I walked to the door and closed it myself. And when I was at the door, I could smell alcohol on his breath.

About an hour and half later my mom opened my door and said "Could you come help me with Kari? He's lying on the floor"
Surprised of what was happening at the moment and not having heard anything about him in over an hour, I followed my mom and saw Kari fallen on the floor on the bathroom.

Mom and I helped him to stand by taking a grip from his shoulders. He was rather heavy since he has a rather big.."beer belly"..

Next, Mom guided him to the bathroom. I needed to clear my head so I went to walk Pete.

When I came back, Kari had gone sleeping.

Then Mom and I went to the sauna together. That relaxed and calmed us both. 

By the way, Kari's attempts of making pancakes were completely unsuccessful. He put the flour and the eggs straight into the the frying pan... >_< I've never made pancakes myself, but EVEN I know that's not the way to do it.

So now it's 9:47 pm, Friday night. We came back home around  after 8 and have been trying to calm ourselves again while cleaning the house a bit. Kari woke up around then, with a headache and he's a lot more calmer and bit disoriented. He knew that he had bumped his head and when he dreamt about being in heaven... O_O 


I found out today what the whole Puerto de la cruz business was. Kari has an email friend who lives there and he's going to go live there. Brilliant, right? Except that he doesn't speak a word of English or any other language except Finnish... also the fact that he's very forgetful, so one minute he's a nice guy and the next moment he doesn't know where he even is, or what he the topic the conversation is, or what he just few minutes ago said, or doesn't know that he's repeating his words for for third time...

-----

about 30 minutes later:

I just came from his room, I helped him with his virus scanning program. We talked about computers and his trip,

I'm a little tired now. I've been writing this for about an hour. So I'm going to end it right here.

Good night

926985  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2007-04-05
Written: (6242 days ago)
926969  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2007-04-05
Written: (6242 days ago)

<img:http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/e/ed/AmericaFerrera_UglyBetty.jpg/250px-AmericaFerrera_UglyBetty.jpg>
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0805669/

I don't get it.
She isn't ugly at all.
"Ugly Betty" What a stupid name for a television show.

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