24/08/2006: I was pressent in that place stil my mind was dreaming,
looking at that girl how wonderfulll she was.
But time can't be changed i said to myself. Talking to her of past connections between us,
oh how wonderfull it all seemed talking about some random stuff stil coming to that one point we both feared those past moment of us,
as she talked i looked at her and back to the sky or ground
we came to a point silence fell between us how terrible it was
for it was the silence that must not be broken with words.
I looked at her she faintly smiles i did not dare to think what would follow but stil i did.
I slowly moved my head to her and kisses those lips i wished i never gave up,
ow stupid my actions were in the past but stil from those a human can only learn.
For in that night i fell that love again like nothing can come between us.
But suddenly like lightning that struck i realised it could not be.
I backed away feeling how wrong i was to kiss her but still i didn't want it to end.
(this was a fictional/msn meeting)

14/09/2006
at a later date we meeted for real i came to the place we meeted a boy sitting next to her a faint anger awoken in me
how it felt like she was showing right before my face to fuck off. I stayed not really knowing how to act, seeing that boy lay his hand on her she kissing him on the head. How i hated both of them time ticked away the boy lefted before he did i found out there was nothing between them still i thad my doubt we halked i bacame angres she calmed me down we hugged and that one act i missed so much happen we kisses. That love for her slumbering inside me grew as huges flames fuild by gasoline we talked of old and new feelings we kissed more just to one point. almost time for her to head home her last word it could not be. how could she tell that i could not believe it i knew she doesnt meanst it really she is just afraid of errors of the past.
how i love her so much its consummes me fully after taking more afterwards she doesnt want to tell what she truely wants i become inpatient how desperate i start feeling i want a anwser
here i sit alone consumed by love becoming a empty shell
only she can do something about it

---

working on something new in my room i cleared a space in my room and put in a small sofa behind it on the wal i started to spray a forest of bamboo with some animals and flowers how i like doing so it brings me peace and quietness to my soul i think i'll alway have something like that when i start drawing on paper or wall
i don't know why i'm telling maybe if i do this and you read it all you learn more about me things i would maybe never say

some random poems and other sorts i like

What Shall I Say About the Irish?


The utterly impractical, never predictable,
Sometimes irascible, quite inexplicable, Irish.Strange blend of shyness,
pride and conceit,
And stubborn refusal to bow in defeat.
He's spoiling and ready to argue and fight,
Yet the smile of a child
fills his soul with delight.
His eyes are the quickest to well up with tears,
Yet his strength is the strongest
to banish your fears.
His hate is as fierce as his devotion is grand,
And there is no middle ground
on which he will stand.
He's wild and he's gentle,
he's good and he's bad.
He's proud and he's humble,
he's happy and sad.
He's in love with the ocean,
the earth and the skies,
He's enamoured with beauty wherever it lies.
He's victor and victim, a star and a clod,
But mostly he's Irish—
in love with his God.

---

No man ever wore a scarf as warm as his daughter’s arm around his neck.


In every land, hardness is in the north of it, softness in the south, industry in the east, and fire and inspiration in the west.


An Irish Pub Joke...
An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scotsman go into a pub. Each orders a pint of Guinness. Just as the bartender hands them over, three flies buzz down and land-- one, two, three-- in each of the pints.
The Englishman looks disgusted, pushes his pint away and demands another... the Scotsman picks out the fly, shrugs, and takes a long swallow.

The Irishman reaches in to the glass, grabs the fly between his fingers and shakes him as hard as he can, shouting 'Spit it out, ya bloody bastard! Spit it out!'

---

In life, there are only two things to worry about—
Either you are well or you are sick.
If you are well, there is nothing to worry about,

But if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about—
Either you will get well or you will die.
If you get well, there is nothing to worry about,

But if you die, there are only two things to worry about—
Either you will go to heaven or hell.
If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about.

And if you go to hell, you’ll be so busy shaking hands with all your friends
You won’t have time to worry!


Ode to Beer Of

all my favorite things to do, The
utmost is to have a brew. My love grows for my
foamy friend, with each thirst-quenching elbow
bend. Beer's so frosty, smooth, and cold------
It's paradise----Pure liquid gold | Yes beer
means many things to me that's all for now -------
I gotta Pee

---

I sit in the mist..all alone, left behind..with a world around me, that i do not recognize

look into the mirror and tell yourself your a piece of shit


when i get to heaven to saint peter i will tell

one more soldier reporting sir

ive served my time in hell

-anoumiouys

A Poem

a beautiful butterfly came floating by
and landed on my cheek just a smidget from my eye
i said to my little friend "GET THE FUCK OFF ME BUG"

---

An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics.

The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."
Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute.

Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all.

His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"


A Pagan dies and to his great surprise he finds himself standing before some pearly gates.
[Pagan:] "Where am I?"
St. Peter: "You're at the gates of Heaven"
[Pagan:] "But I dont believe in Heaven"
St. Peter: "You're one of those arent you?"
[Pagan:] "Yes. I believe I'm in the wrong place Im supposed to be in Summerland."
St. Peter: "Sorry, We took overSummerland, and its temporarily closed for remodeling."
[Pagan:] "What should i do now?"
Peter: "Well since we dont allow Pagans in Heaven, you'll have to go to Hell. Sorry. Just follow that path than leads down and to the left."
The Pagan walks down to Hell where the gates are standing wide open. He walks in and finds beautiful meadows, happy animals, and clear streams of water.
He walks on in and begins exploring, and after a few minutes a courtly gentleman walks up to him and bows politely.
"Hello, Im Satan. You must be the guy St. Peter called me about. Are you a Pagan?"
[Pagan:] "Yes I am. What's going to happen now?"
Satan: "Well the fishings good if you enjoy that sort of thing. There's a little refreshments stand just down the road. And I believe the Pagan meeting grounds are right over the next hill."
Suddenly a hole opens up in the sky above and a yawning chasm opens directly underneath it. The stench of sulphur and firing brimstone fills the air. Hundreds of screaming, tortured souls drop down into the flaming pit which immediately closes with a thud.
The Pagan hardly believes what he just saw.
[Pagan:] "And what was THAT?!?!"
Satan rolls his eyes: "Oh just ignore them. They're Christians, they wouldnt have it any other way."

---

the strugle between the inner voices of a human before he kills himself
the + is the good inner voice and - you get it
(just to tell i'm not in that kind of mood i LOVE life)
-You know this most be done
+But there most be another way
-There is no other way
  There is no oter choise
   There is nothing
+Don't do it
   Think about it one more time
-Give it up
  You know that you hae failed your life
+NO, that's a lie
-Your life s a lie
+What about all the beauty of this world
-For you, it doesn't matter anymre
+Giving up is cowardly
-Not fulfilling your fate is cowardly
+This was never your fate
-This was never your world
+Its's a wrong thing to do
-NO    it's right
   because
  death means Freedom


he's all alone
and sits in a cell from 1 by 2
without light or windows,
he's tired of life and wants to end it but
the means are not there.
Desperetly he trys to scratch towards his heart,
but the gaurd notice so they rush in and remove his nails
with the blood he can just barely draw two breast on the wall.and he collapses on the ground trying to satisfy himself with this image. But just before he comes
he gets awake and realise its just a dream,
in reality he still sits in his cell from 1 by 2
with his cut of hands and hearing that one song in his head
"powder your face with sunshine,
put on a great big smile
make up your eyes with laughter.
Folks will be laughing with you,
in a little while whisel a tune of gladness.
Blue never was in style,
the futures brighter when hearts are lighter
so smile smile smile"

THE PILLS THAT I'M POPING GO POPPETY POP...
IN MY HEAD OF INSANITY I SEE FURRY RED DOTS
IT BOTHERS ME NOT FOR I'M AS HIGH AS A KITE
LEGALLY SO, BECAUSE IT'S WHAT THE DOCTOR PRESCRIBES.
PROZAC IS CANDY WHEN MIXED WITH A PIE
CODINE IS FUN WHEN PLACED IN YOUR EYE
NYQUIL IS BETTER WHEN YOU ALL WANT TO DRIVE
BUT USING HEAVY EQUIPMENT IS WAY OUT OF LINE
I SOMETIMES GET DROWSY MIXING ADVIL AND SPLEEN
MORPHINE IS FINE EXCEPT FOR THE DREAMS
I ONCE SAW A LAMB DANCING ON GLASS
AND THE ELVIS SIGHTINGS ARE A PAIN IN THE ASS
HE STOLE MY FRIED CHICKEN WITHOUT ANY A CARE...
BUT THE JOKE WAS ON ME....'CAUSE IT NEVER WAS THERE.
SO AS I DOZE OFF IN MY PRESCRIPTION BOUGHT DREAM.
I WANT MY FREE HEALTH CARE SO I CAN GET HIGH AS I PLEASE.

---

You took my world
And tore it apart
But I still love you
Though you broke my heart

You don't understand
You never will
Love's a gun
And it shoots to kill

I cut and cut
Till my blood ran blue
But still I can't stop
Thinking of you

I close my eyes
Watch the lights dance
Just you and I
In this Twisted Romance

---

As I looked into the mirror, and saw the creation which was fading
I sailed the darkened waters of my soul on the ship of flaming hate
Towards the land of the damned..
The cold winds of the darkness blow strongly
The cemetery glows in the dark
A thousand times, thousand voices are screaming in pain from beyond
A number of faceless shapes march forth from the darkness within
Life is slowly passing away, poisoned by guilt and sin
Embraced in Black I lie
Only waiting to die the greatest of life's events
And I begin my journey..
As hands of greater characters unveil the world
Plunging through space and time, my prison has now been slain

The reaper purifies my soul..

Perdition and death - I was in ages so dark and far away..
And I will always be

The secret of nature is that once something is at the height of growth and beauty,
it is time for it wither and die.
A bit like the British empire!
Look at that whole place withering and dying,
right before our eyes... it's run by a Queen!
And if she had a pistol she'd be the King.

---

      Oi! is having a laugh and having a say.
      Oi! is bigger than any uniform.
      Oi! is sharp in brain and dress.
      Oi! is you and me... Winning.
      Oi! is thinking for yourself.
      Oi! is pride and self-respect.
      Oi! is the beat of the street.
      Oi! is working class protest.
      Oi! is youth eternal.
      Oi! is youth enrage.
      Oi! is a way of life