If I was a country I'd be Egypt
If I was an ocean or body of water I'd be Atlantic ocean
If I was a piece of candy I'd be a chocolate one
If I was a store I'd be a musical one
If I was a brand of shoe I'd be STRANGEtm
If I was an icecream flavor I'd be vanilla
If I was a disease I'd be headache))))
If I was a feeling I'd be LOVE
If I was a president I wouldnt be
If I was a city I'd be Cairo
If I was a color I'd be bordeau
If I was a celebrity I'd be Sandra Schleret
If I was a movie I'd be Starwars or Lotr
If I was a brand of toothpaste I'd be Colgate
If I was a currency I'd be .... what?
If I were a month, I'd be july
If I were a day of the week, I'd be Sunday
If I were a time of day, I'd be dawn
If I were a planet, I'd be Venus
If I were a sea animal, I'd be tiger shark
If I were a direction, I'd be straight
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be a bed
If I were a tree, I'd be pineapple
If I were a bird, I'd be seagull
If I were a flower, I'd be an orchid
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be MY ELECTRICAL GUITAR!!!!! Doubtlesss
If I were a sound, I'd be mmmmm
If I were a song, I'd be Wundwasser by Eisregen
If I were a food, I'd be ice cream
If I were a taste, I'd be jummie
If I were a word, I'd be "dream"
If I were a body part, I'd be finger
If I were a shape, I'd be an eternity sign
If I were a number, I'd be 7

I am the evil. I am not worthy of talking to normal ppl, I am only worthy of hurting me and making me wanna fall asleep forever

The Dead Dog Cafe Comedy Hour

Be it hereby declared and proclaimed that on
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
The wheels were 'spun' for
PANDORA ATENAIS
and she will henceforth be known by her new
AUTHENTIC INDIAN NAME:
Joy Monacled Toad
~ Stay Calm... Be Brave... Wait for the Signs ~



My fairy is called Fidget Goblinweb
She is a bringer of riches and wealth
She lives in rotting woodlands near poisonous toadstools
She is only seen in the mist of an early morning



My pirate name is:
Dirty Mary Kidd




My chinese name is
Ao Ping Ning
beautiful, attractive, charming, graceful
repose, serenity, peace; peaceful
I was born in the Year of the Ox








Goth name is Bloody Tears





Japnese name is
Endoh (distant wisteria) Kumiko (eternal beautiful child)



Congratulations! Here is my perfectly Potterized name!
Pansy





My Smurf Name is:Kung Pao Smurf





Elf name is Nindë Elendil





My pagan name is
 Lilith Erin Muse




The Great Archives determine me to have gone by the identity:
Veronique le Boursier
Known in some parts of the world as:
Demeter of The Vrykolakas
The Great Archives Record:
Originated in Greece, in the fever of the Crypt.

I hate ppl you know.. I feel like they are all evil. They are selfish, egoistic, and mad. They make me sick. They don't let me live my life like I wish to live it. They disturb me with their whims. They shut my mouth when I want to speak, they do everything that makes me mad, like they plan to make a psycho out of me.
I spent my time on the Chistyi Blvd last Wednesday, I was surrounded by my precious goths: I love these ppl. they are so nice - and I feel so nice among them too:) Anyway it's always interesting to go and pass an evening there cause you can just sit on a bench and look at the ppl passing by and just watch their clothes, and as I love clothes, especially gothic, I love to do so. And no one judges you for that cause they stare at you too.
So. where was I. Yes. The ppl there were nice. One girl, Charna, is my friend for year or so, she's kind and understanding, and you will always know what to talk to her about. There was Vampire, he loves all the girls in the world, and he's very funny to spend time with if you are just his friend. Then, there was Laiho, my ex, I dated him half a year, and then I opened that he loved another girl, and we had a quarrel (he loved my long hair and to show him that we've come to an end I went to the barbery and cut it short to 2 santimeters - I looked wonderful, as a little elf:))), and then we became friends - he knows me so well, and I know him as a brother, and love him as a brother, and - oh -he left that girl:))). Then there was my own bro, I love him much, and he's always nice to me and ready to kill anybody for me and serve him on a golden dish:). Then, there was my 'wife' - she's my closest friend, and as we are always together at the university and mostly on summers, everybody calls us wives - I AM NOT A LESBIAN!!! Then, there were lots of good ppl. And everything would be a dream if not one girl who made me loathe (so as she made my wife and my brother too). Ohh she was so damn sick - she was drunk to death while everybody was normal and sufficient, and she stuck to everybody, joked stupidly and did things that made evrybody sick. And she said things, that made everybody mad, but as she was a girl, the men couldn't say it to her, and the girls found it beneath their dignity speaking to her in any way. And so the evening turned into a nightmare cause I couldn't even speak to anybody well - she always listened or made her stupid commentaries....
I hate ppl. Well, not all of them, of course - there are some close friends who will never do anything that makes me sick, cause they care for me. But why, why the hell are there so few of them??? Is the Earth populated with stupid ppl? I would rather live on Saturn with those few then....
:(((((

I hate ppl you know.. I feel like they are all evil. They are selfish, egoistic, and mad. They make me sick. They don't let me live my life like I wish to live it. They disturb me with their whims. They shut my mouth when I want to speak, they do everything that makes me mad, like they plan to make a psycho out of me.
I spent my time on the Chistyi Blvd last Wednesday, I was surrounded by my precious goths: I love these ppl. they are so nice - and I feel so nice among them too:) Anyway it's always interesting to go and pass an evening there cause you can just sit on a bench and look at the ppl passing by and just watch their cloths, and as I love clothes, especially gothic, I love to do so. And no one judges yu for that vause they stare at you too.
So. where was I. Yes. The ppl there were nice. One girl, Charna, is my friend for year or so, she's kind and understanding, and you will always know what to talk to her about. There was Vampire, he loves all the girls in the world, and he's very funny to spend time with if you are just his friend. Then, there was Laiho, my ex, I dated him half a year, and then I opened that he loved another girl, and we had a quarrel (he loved my long hair and to show him that we've come to an end I went to the barbery and cut it short to 2 santimeters - I looked wonderful, as a little elf:))), and then we became friends - he knows me so well, and I know him as a brother, and love him as a brother, and - oh -he left that girl:))). Then there was my own bro, I love him much, and he's always nice to me and ready to kill anybody fo me. Then, there was my 'wife' - she's my closest friend, and as we are always together at the university and mostly on summers, everybody calls us wives - I AM NOT A LESBIAN!!!

And here I am, the Greatest Master of never-ending internet time!!!! Although, only on one MacOs Pc, but soon my big cool computer will be ready and the never ending internet will be totally under my only control:))

Oh, and you know, Appendixes are becoming extinct!!! Soon there will be no appendixes at all... Oh, sad, sad is my future... Poor me...

You know, diary, it's hard, really hard to be an appendix. First, everybody calls you "Appendix" so that you can't forget that you're an appendix. Appendix means : a very-very little part of everybody - little or small in the meaning of height. So, everybody calls you Appendix, and then everybody hardly notice you again because of your height. So, you are small, and everybody makes you think of it all the time, and so you get used to a situation when even somebody of 1,70sm high is even higher than you. To talk to somebody you gotta raise your head and try to make your speech louder so that one could hear it... Okay, no, it's not THAT hard. But it is hard anyway. You cannot become a top-model or something. You cannot find clothes and all you may do is finding children clothes, or make them by your own hands yourself... That's how ppl start to wear platforms on their feet, strange clothes on their body and braids on the their head - just to make themselves noticeable. That's what I have to do. Oh, and I have a loud voice - that makes me the coolest among all the Appendixes in the world.

Now I did it - though I dunno the results I did it anyway. It was really hard yesterday but now I am calm, happy and ready to work, sing, visit concerts, and doing whatever my soul desires....

My music - a compilation of my favs for today:
Nik Page - Dein Kuss
System of a down - Revenga
Punto omega - Punto omega
Tristania - track 9 from beyond the Veil
Eisregen - Wundwasser
Sirenia - First we take manhattan
Dreams of sanity - The creature that you came to see
Icon of coil - Simulated
After forever - Follow in the cry
Therion - dreams of swedenborg

Almost 2 days left till my exam... Fear is growing, and head is already full of knowledge and refuses to accept new one... Woke up first at9, then at 11, then at 12 and felt like im gonna faint... and feel like this at this moment - STUDYING IS EVIL! I wish it is all over and I live a human life...

Here is my Diary. Hello Diary!! It is midnight in Moscow and I am studying to get a good mark for my exam and finally re-enter university - now for filosofy.... It is a toture when you have to learn something in a small period of time and you have no interest in it - you have already finished religions and filosofy itself and now you are left tet-a-tete with logics...