why do i fall for it every time? why do i assume everything's gonna be good again? why don't i give up on him? this time i'm not gonna let it happen...this time i'm not gonna let him hurt me...this time i'm gonna keep going and ignore it...oh who am i kidding?!

you'd think that by now i'd learnt that if i laugh at people who are ill i'll inevitably get the same thing a bit later...but no...i laughed at those on camp who all had to spend days in the quarantine room and so guess what...i'm ill now...GRRRRRR i feel fine apart from the whole feeling sick thing, acheyness and the fact that my legs wobble every time i stand up...fantastic *rolls eyes*

EDIT: comfort eating out of boredom and loneliness, having a stomach bug and having period pain is not the best combination in the world...not making me feel any better...i'm not going to complain any more i shall just grin and bear it *pained grin*

after a discussion on my crazy eating habits:

jo: "becca, i can just imagine you and your friends getting together and sitting around drinking coffee, eating twiglets and chatting for hours"
me: "sounds familiar..."

in 2003 i went on a Christian camp in the summer to keep my friend company...since then i've been on two more summer camps and 3 easter camps...therefore spanning 6 years...every year someone has asked me if I'm a Christian and each year i've said "i'm thinking about it" so 6 years later i'm STILL thinking about it and now it's getting ridiculous...my current plan is to go to uni and find a church there but really that's 3 months away and yeah that might seem insignificant but what if i never get to uni...what's my plan then...? someone solve my problem?

also the worst thing you could say to someone trying their hardest to lose weight: "i hadn't even noticed you'd lost weight, you look exactly the same"

one of my best friends on the subject of me being posh:

"Sterry is not posh, she is as common as crap, swears like hell, takes pride in her metro collection and sleeps in a box in vts office"

and that's why i love her =)

apparently i even look posh though erm yeah right...=S

i swear there are some guys on earth put here just to destroy girls...and this guy i have to spend a whole week with...argh =( much love while i'm in sheep-land

there's too many fucking inconsiderate people in world...apparently every single doctor in the hospital my mum works in were needed to trreat patients with shock from below mentioned plane crash instead of saving a seriously ill patient...people drive away without stopping to see the disaster they cause...how about all those people collapsing inside from shock that had it been one miunute later life could be very different...what the fuck is wrong with this world now? i can't stand seeing so many people hurt anymore...

shit...that's 5 mins away from my grandparents hosue...and in fact it's pretty close as the crow flies...that's too close...

http://news.uk.msn.com/Article.aspx?cp-documentid=7924449

what is it about classics and small trees? yup that's right...photocopying vases twice to ensure the maximum use out of resources/me actually learning has created a pile of paper as big as our whole folder last year...ah bugger it...

quote of yesterday:

various people: so how's your daughter
mum: ask her yourself *gestures towards me*
various people: oh...my...goodness...that's Rebecca? last time i saw you, you were this *gestures teeny height* tall!
me: oh dearie...

on the other hand the groom remembered me and so did his sister =) impressive considering i've changed and i might not have had curly hair yesterday either which mum told everyone i have =S ahahahahahahaha

starry stickers =) yaye!

on the other hand mym coursework is boring and written by a 14 year old...yaye! =/

feel free to remove my star for today but ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

mr r: so what unis have you accepted offers from?
me: leeds and reading
mr r: and leeds are asking for ABB?
me: noooooooooooooo BBB
mr r: so do you think with your grades at the moment you'll be able to get BBB?
me: no
mr r: so why did you accept such a high offer?
me: because i got three rejections, so these were the only offers...
mr r: oh...oh...oh...ok...

my English teacher/form tutor might believe in me but the director of sixth form doesn't...i'm screwed seriously...

owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww my head is killing me...gosh it must be deadline season...my headaches are the surefire indication...owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

i swear my mother doesn't want me to have any independence whatsoever...grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

for pretty much all my life i've gone to bed late-ish and got up quite early...someone explain this...
thursday night: bed about 11:30pm
friday morning: up at 9am
friday night: bed at midnight
saturday morning: up at 11am
saturday night: bed at 1am
sunday morning: up at 11:30am
sunday night: bed at 11:30pm
monday morning: up at 12:48pm!!! whatttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt?

excuse if on Wednesday i'm dead before lunchtime at school my brain doesn't seem to do mornings at the moment...

my dad just called the dog "cornflakes on legs" ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...etc...

i'd forgotten how relaxed life is when you smile...today it's liz's birthday so happy birthday to her =) yesterday she decided my mum was my sister...oh dearie...today my dad took the tyre with a pucnture to the garage and they were like "no puncture here" ahahahaha gutted at him...we had about 2 minutes of snow today and that made me feel so happy again =)...i'm only scared about one thing...i'm half falling for several guys(guys i can actually half fall for...they're not attached to anyone for a change!)...but ah well life goes on...i just have to keep praying that feeling like this lasts for a bit longer...at least until Easter camp...and now I'm off to watch Toy Story 2 =)

"Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and
the wisdom to know the difference."

-Saint Francis of Assisi

for some reason today this means something to me...

chemistry teacher: "i'm not paying money for a flaming hole!"

chemistry teacher: "horses are a bit camp really"

martine: <insert a million references to holes here>

"make her cry...i want to drink her tears"