The biggest story I have ever written has been just a bit shy of 6,000 words. 2,000 words in and I'm stuck. I need to go buy some books and work on my plot development.

In any case, I care more for quality than quantity at the moment. But so help me may God strike me down Himself if I don't get to at least 5,000 words by tonight! IT WILL HAPPEN!

I follow very closely to what the lead singer of Fall Out Boy, Patrick Stump, does. It's not an obsession. It's not a serial killer kind of thing. It's not even really a fan-girl thing. Screw the other band members; I just want to know what Mr. Stump is doing.

I think Patrick Stump is the best looking of the group. I have a thing for the slightly-chubby red headed guys, as long as they are broad. But aside of that, he has a great smile. The rest of them are too... skinny. However, there is one very important trait that makes me leer after Patrick Stump, and that is...

His voice.

Some may think the lead singer of Panic! at the Disco has a good voice (whatever the hell his name is), but they are wrong. His voice is nice and smooth with just a bit of a treble to it, but where's the real emotion? It's just a bunch of notes off a page. That is obvious.

So, I follow closely to see what Mr. Stump has been up to; specifically, I don't care much of his personal life. I care more for his career and what songs he has sung in recently. He's probably got a girlfriend and is completely happy. Well break my damn heart. He's 21-22ish and I'm 17. Not. Gonna. Happen.

Doesn't mean I can't enjoy his voice and his development. From his first 'big' CD, that being Take This To Your Grave, his voice was still being formed. It was hesitant. It was weak. It was gorgeous.

Then, in FUCT, he was better. He sounded more like the guy from P!ATD, but with a more manly voice and less "I'm just doing this to impress you". His voice was strong, it was ready. It was beautiful.

Since FUCT, I have been in love with the band. I was for their first CD, but it wasn't the gut-wrenching emptiness in the pit of my stomach as it holed up into an electric ball of excitement that FUCT gave me.

Fall Out Boy is not my 'type' of band. I do enjoy punk rock and alternative, but the emo stuff and pop punk does not appeal. Okay, your mother died and your father left you. At least you didn't have to go through what Shasta did. Get over it.

The reason why I like Fall Out Boy so much is because OF Patrick Stump. I have a serious reaction to his action (that being, his voice). His progression over time has been amazing. His new songs he sings in... put simply, gives my ears an orgasm to listen to. Especially in "Don't Wake Me Up" with The Hush Sound.

I get goosebumps. I get shaky. I get breathless. This is a good voice. This is what makes the song. This is what I love so much. This is a voice that can belong to any kind of music, it being rap, emo, hardcore, new age... whatever. It fits.

Should I ever be able to ask Mr. Stump face to face about how he feels about being a singer... I would feel so lucky. I don't need to marry him. I don't need to fuck him. I don't even need to touch him. A conversation would more than appease me. That, or a song called, 'Emily'. That isn't about heartbreak.

So there, you have my explanation. The first musical voice that could make me feel sick, make my knees water, and put that empty feeling in my stomach... and make me love it. Patrick Stump.

People who posts pictures of their dead pets "in loving memory" are lacking in social relations with other people.

If I find anyone stealing this, I shall be incredibly sore. And you won't much like hearing from me.

I've been calling it "Sweetheart" so far. Unfinished.

The Prestige... was... fucking fantastic ><

Today was the first day I had ever been in an accident.

Matt can't drive everyone around and Wednesday is "Subway day"... we all pile into the car and go get lunch at Subway. Matt, Elyse, Zach, and Pearly were in the car and I was driving since I'm the only one with a license which allows me to drive that many people around legally.

So I was pulling into the Subway lot and was going to back up into a parking spot, and I reached down to put the car in reverse, when suddenly I got jolted and I got a sharp pain in my side which has slowly spread over my back since I've been sat down.

Some poor fool backed up into us. I suppose he didn't see us there, but he should have been looking in his rearview mirror to double check anyway. He got a busted back light (but it still worked), while the Jeep suffered an indent in the driver side bender. The driver's side door is a bit difficult to open and shut now, but nothing bad. Fenders are fairly cheap.

We exchanged information. I was stumbling a little uncontrollably but I was too numb and shaken up to feel anything. About half way through 5th period I started getting a sharp ache in my side, but after some deep breathing I controlled it. Matt and I went to the video store and my back started aching badly. It's hurting pretty badly right now. If it stiffens up anymore tomorrow I'll go to the doctor to get it checked out, but I'm sure I'll be fine.

I called my mom as soon as I got to school and told her everything. Then I had Matt call his dad. His dad asked for the boy's name and then realised that he was good friends with the boy's mother and father, so there's nothing to worry insurance wise. Not for me, at least! I did nothing illegal and wasn't the person who backed up.

Bah.

Okay, I got like 10 text messages asking if Matt and I were going out/commenting about how cute we were...

So whoever is spreading these rumors... please stop. They're not funny.

Just for clarification: Matt and I have never made out!!!
Or kissed!
Or held hands!
Gr you people piss me off.

Wtf.

What the fuck.

Someone apparently saw Matt and I making out.

Right.

Wtf.

Nov. 17th, to the 2nd of December.

As quoted from someone who plays an "evil" character in my game (who we totally owned):

"Yeah, we kind of like... yeah. Yeah, we got owned. It's like that type of owning where you don't even have time to contemplate how badly you just got owned. You just get owned and look back at logs of it and are like... "Man, I got owned.""

What an awful morning I had.

I went to bed at 12, and I suppose I forgot to put my alarm clock on. Well, I didn't get up.

I woke up to the dog's annoying barking and was instantly pissed off. I open the door to see Matt, who was supposed to take me to school. I think my morning look scared the living daylights out of him.

ANYWAY.

It was 8:40 and school started at 9. So of course, that gives me 5 minutes to get ready. And of course, it takes me 10.

Boo. I was a mess. And I felt icky. Came home and took a 30 minute shower. It felt amazing.

Boo on me.

Next time I'll be up and ready for that bastard.

I should play Windwaker, but... too busy doing homework.

Cheers to essays. I'm so damn lazy.

I had a dream that I got to eat a caramel cheesecake drink from Black Tie.

I think I'm getting addicted.

I woke up at 8, and went back to bed until 2. It felt goooood. Played my game and got some experience (whoo!). But now I'm bored. I feel like going out tonight, but... I'm not sure.

Perhaps I'll go to real soda tomorrow. Maybe call up Krystal or find someone who wants to go...

Boo. So incredibly bored.

So... bored...

[The Taste of Ink !]... lighten up on the makeup. You're 13, not 30. You have natural beauty.

Lighten on the eyeliner. Please, you'll save some of the environment AND you'll be doing yourself a favor.

Lyndee
Lythea
Kirrh
Antonius

Put an x for all the things you have
done:
[ ] been drunk.
[ ] smoked pot.
[X] kissed a member of the same sex.
[ ] rode in a taxi.
[x] been dumped.
[ ] shoplifted.
[ ] been fired.
[x] been in a fist fight. (Only playful)
[ ] made out with a stranger.
[ ] stole something from your job.
[_] celebrated new years in times square.
[_] went on a blind date.
[x] lied to a friend. (I don't pride myself on it.)
[ ] had a crush on a teacher
[ ] been to Europe.
[x] skipped school.
[ ] thrown up from drinking.
[x] lost your sibling
[x] had a sleepover party.
[x] went ice skating.
[x] been cheated on.
[x] had a car. (truck, technically)
[x] drove.


Do you...
[x] have a boyfriend.
[ ] have a girlfriend.
[ ] have a crush.
[x] feel loved.
[x] feel lonely.
[x] feel happy.
[ ] hate yourself.
[ ] have a dog.
[x] have your own room.
[x] listen to rap.
[x] listen to rock.
[x] listen to soul.
[x] listen to techno.
[x] listen to reggae.
[ ] paint your nails.
[ ] have more than 1 best friend.
[ ] get good grades.
[ ] play an instrument.
[x] have slippers.
[x] wear boxers.
[ ] wear eyeliner.
[x] like the color blue.
[x] like the color yellow.
[x] cyber.
[?] claim.
[x] like to read.
[x] like to write.
[x] have long hair.
[ ] have short hair.
[x] have a cell phone.
[x] have a laptop.
[ ] have a pager.


Are you...
[ ] ugly.
[ ] pretty.
[x] ok.
[x] bored.
[x] happy.
[x] short.
[ ] tall.
[ ] grounded.
[ ] sick.
[x] lazy.
[ ] talking to someone.
[ ] scared to die.
[x] sleepy.
[ ] on the phone.
[x] in your room.
[ ] drinking something.
[ ] eating something.
[x] in your pjs.
[x] ticklish.
[x] listening to music.
[ ] homophobic.
[ ] allergic to Seanbean
[ ] Viggo-fan
[ ] afraid of vikings
[x] afraid of horny vikings
[ ] afraid of spiders
[ ] dance in the rain
[x] have a stuffed animal
[ ] play magic
[x] know music that turns you on
[ ] Skype a lot?


Is there...


[x] a dead body nearby?
[ ] a crucifix on your wall
[ ] posters of guys on your wall
[ ] posters of girls on your wall
[x] water nearby


Do you dig...


[x]Men
[ ]Women
[ ] Vikings
[ ] Elves
[x] Rangers
[ ] Bikers
[x] Succubi
[x] Incubi
[x] Older
[ ] Younger
[ ] Your pretty cute aragorn actionfigure (Ew.)

( Astrological sign? ) Gemini
( Chinese zodiac sign? ) Snake
( Location ) Up your ass and around the corner.
( Birth Location ) Sane Jose, California.
( Sexual Preference ) Male.
( Marital Status ) Involved.
( Current Hair color ) Auburn.
( Eye color ) Blue, green, or grey. They change colors randomly.
( Height ) 5'0
( Weight ) 100lbs, been that way for nearly 4 years.
( Parents still together? ) Nah.
( Siblings? ) Youngest of one other.
( Nieces/Nephews? ) Nope, none yet.
( Kids of your own? ) I would hope not.
( Grandkids? ) Nah.
( Pets? ) None.
( In school/graduated? ) Senior in highschool.
( Rent, lease, or own your home? ) Not yet.
( What do you do for work? ) Looking for a job, currently a student.
( How much do you make? ) 0.00 an hour.
( Have any credit cards? ) Just one, a Mastercard.
( AmEx? ) Nah.
( Can I use em for a few days? ) Noo.
( What do you drive? ) A 1996 Ford Ranger. Lapis.
( Black and White/Color ) Both.
( Black/White ) Both.
( Red/Blue ) Blue.
( Dogs/Cats ) Dogs.
( Roses/Daisies ) Neither.
( Beer/Liquor ) Liquor.
( Boxers/Briefs ) .Briefs.
( Hair: Short/Long ) Short for boys. Long for me.
(Boots/Shoes ) Stell-toed boots for boys.
( Food: Mexican/Italian ) Italian. I like pasta far more than nachos.
( Dark/Light ) Light.
( Day/Night ) Day.
( City/Country ) Both.
( Sheets: Solid/Animal Prints ) Solid.
( Sub/Dom ) Either or.
( Color ) Lapis.
( Animal ) Tiger or Swan.
( Vehicle ) Ford.
( Flower ) Rover Daisy.
( Soda ) Sprite.
( Food ) Ice cream.
( Book ) His Dark Materials Trilogy.
( Author ) Philip Pullman.
( Band ) The Ataris, Fall Out Boy.
( Song ) Boys of Summer, Animals.
( Movie ) Meh.
( Director ) Shayalaman.
( Country ) US of A.
( School Subject ) Angrish.
( Movie genre ) Whatever might look good.
( Extracurricular Activity ) Newspapers.
( Color your hair? ) No.
( Have tattoos? ) Nah.
( Piercing? ) Ears. Formerly navel.
( Have a boyfriend/girlfriend/both? ) Boyfriend.
( Floss daily? ) Yes.
( Own a webcam? ) No.
( Ever get off the damn computer? ) Yep.
( Quack? Quack quack? ) Moo.
( Gotten a speeding ticket? ) Not yet.
( Been in a wreck? ) Never.
( Been arrested? ) No.
( Stolen a car? ) Not technically.
( Stolen anything? ) No. But I have used stolen condoms before.
( Smoke? ) No.
( Been so drunk you didn't care that you couldn't remember your name? ) No drinking here.
( Considered a life of crime? ) Yes.
( Considered being a hooker? ) Ohh yeah.
( Maybe a pimp? ) Nah.
( Cheated on someone? ) Yes.
( Been married? ) Technically three times.
( Been divorced? ) Yes, once.
( Are you psycho? ) I hope.
( Split personalities? ) No.
( Schizophrenic? ) The voices say I'm not.
( Obsessive? ) Yes.
( Compulsive? ) Yes.
( Obsessive Compulsive? ) No. No. Yes. Yes.
( Panic? ) A lot.
( Anxiety? ) A lot.
( Depressed) Not often.
( Suicidal? ) No.
( Cheated/Cheat ) Yes.



1. Smoked a cigarette: Nope
2. Smoked a cigar: Nope
3. Snorted coke: No.
4. Smoked Weed: Disgusting, no.
5. Been high: No.
6. Had sex: Yes.
7. Said "I hope you die" to someone: If you haven't, you're missing out.
8. Tried to kill someone: Yes.
9. Tried to kill yourself: Maybe?
10. Got in a fist fight: Not one of the non-playful nature.
11. Lied to your parents: Yes, who doesn't at one point?
12. Broken a bone: No.
13. Lied to your friends: Yes.
14. Bit someone: Roar.
15. Bungee jumped: Not yet.
16. Skydive: Not yet.
17. Gotten drunk: No drinking.
18. Gotten totally smashed: No.
19. Given someone a bruise: I give more than bruises.
20. Skinny-dipped: Yes.
21. Driven illegally: Yes, I broke a few laws in my day.
22. Ditched someone: Yes.
23. Freak danced: Yes.
24. Stole something: No.
25. Cut yourself: Not on purpose.
26. Skipped school: Yes.
27. Hung up on someone: Yes.
28. Gone commando: Yes. Not pleasant for a girl.
29. Threw up at school: No.
30. Kissed someone of the same sex: Yes.
31. Had a burping contest: Yes.
32. Snuck out: Yes.
33. Been to a school dance: Eh, yeah. Ew.
34. Thought your teacher was hot: ... No.



!*~~*! Love !*~~*!
1) Do you believe in love: Yes.
2) Do you believe in love at first sight? No.
3) Are you too shy to ask someone out: No. I lost a potential boyfriend because I was scared. I vowed never to be like that again.
4) Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with: Anthony.
5) Have you ever actually truly honestly been in love before?: I'd like to say so.



1) Boys names(kids): Adonis, Anthony, William.
2) Girls names(kids): None chosen.
3) Subjects in school: English
4) Game(s): Zelda.
5) Cartoon character: Superman.
6) Cartoon? Fosters Home of Imaginary Friends.
7) What’s your favorite thing to do on a weekend? Party.
8) Drink? Water.
9) Cookie?: Mmmm.
10) Day of the week? Saturday.
11) Word or phrase? That which yields is not always weak.
12) Restaurant? Olive Garden.
13) Flower? Rover Daisy.
14) Sport to play?: Softball.
15) Ice cream? Always.



!*~~*! Have you ever !*~~*!
1) Made out with someone? Yes.
2) How many people have you made out with? Nine.
3) Set a body part on fire, for the fun of it? Ha, no.
4) Planned your life around the internet?: Sometimes it happens that way.
5) Gone in public wearing no underwear? Yeah.
6) Swallowed a penny? No.
7) Seen a ghost? Maybe?
8) Ate dirt? Yep.
9) Sucked a bug up your nose? No!
10) Got caught stealing? No.
11) Been to Africa? No.
12) Been toilet papering? No.
13) Been in a car accident? No.
14) Mooned someone? Yes.
15) Been so drunk you passed out? No.
16) Gone out in your pajamas? yes.
17) Missed school because it was raining? Yes.
18) Kept a secret from someone? Yes.
19) Wanted to hook up with a friend? No.
20) Sprained/broken/fractured a bone or gotten stitches?: Sprained some fingers once.
21) Almost died: No.
22) Given anyone a bath: Yes. I have. And not any kids, either.
23) Bungee jumped: No.
24) Broken the law: Yes, a few.
25) Made yourself throw-up: Only when I was sick and I knew it'd make me feel better. Pepto Bismol did the rest. I had the motivation to drink it.



!*~~*! Just Some Questions !*~~*!
1) Where is your favorite place to shop?: Book stores generally.
2) Any tattoos or piercing: My ears. My navel was formerly pierced.
3) Do you do drugs: No.
4) What kind of shampoo do you use: Anything available.
5) What are you most scared of?: Being alone.
6) What car do you wish you had: A black 2005 Ford Mustang. Or a 1967 Chevrolet Bel-Air. Midnight blue, white interior with baby blue trim and dash, and a white trim on the outside with shiny chrome and new rims and big wheels.
7) Who is the last person that called you: Jarrod.
8) Where do you want to get married: In a circus tent.
9) If you could change anything about yourself you'd change: My waist.
10) What is the last movie you saw a a movie theature: Miami Vice. Worst. Movie. Ever.
11) What do you have for breakfast in the morning?: Waffles.
12) Who would you hate being locked up in a room with?: My family. Any one of them.
13) Who would you love being locked in a room with?: Any one of my friends.
14) What super hero would you be?: Batman.
15) What are you wearing right now?: Jeans, Nintendo T-shirt. Shoes, sketchers.
16) If you could be any where in the world, where would you be?: With that special someone.
17) Make up a word and a meaning to go with it: Eck.
18) Do you have any imaginary friend?: Yes.
19) What do you want most out of life? To be happy.
20) Who do you hate the most? A few people.
21) If you had the choice to be a cartoon, who would you be?: Bloo.
22) List a word you think sounds funny: Animosity.
23) What are the last 4-digits in your number: 2512
24) If you were a crayon what color would you be: Lapis.
25) What makes you happy: Freedom.
26) What sport do you hate the most: Football.
27) How many TV's do you have in your house: Just one.
28) Do you sleep with stuffed animals: No. I have a blanket. He's better than a stuffed animal.
29) Who do you tell your dreams to: My journal.
30) How much do you love your job on a scale of 1 to 10? Depends on the job I choose to do.
31) What color is your bedroom carpet? White.
32) How many times did you fail your drivers test? Didn't fail it at all.
33) Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Any mall.
34) What do you do most often when you are bored? Read.
35) Most annoying thing people ask or tell you? "How old are you?"
36) What is the best thing about the opposite sex? Hands, shoulders, eyes, and lips.
37) Who makes you happiest of the opposite sex? David.
38)Who makes you the maddest of the opposite sex? Jarrod.
39) What's the stupidest thing you have ever done? Answered this.

Dial-up on this laptop sucks. I can't seem to sign into any IMs, I'm bored, this connection is slow as hell, aaand I've been puking my guts up for the last day and a half.

Yeehaw.

Yay, new sexy laptop.

It's so shiny and... sleek. And pretty.

Until Dad touched the screen -brandish fists-

To Spokane:

Thanks for the happy birthday. I *really* appreciate it.

Screw this... I'm staying in Oklahoma.