[†Forgotten Agony†]'s diary
what the hell happens when two of your friends break up?? who do you go with and who do you leave? if you stay friends with both then they will get mad at you and you will lose them both.. so WTF??? im tired of my friends hurting and being hurt.. so im going to sacrifice myself for my friends happiness.. goodbye all.. im doing this for your happiness
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HI EVERYONE!!... Just though i would take the time out to tell EVERYONE! that after tonight.. i will no longer be with you guys... someone very close to me has broken my heart and without his love i would die... and its my time to die... i am very very sorry to those i will be hurts.. but all i ask is that no one come with me... you guys have lives to live...idont have one anymore. when you are no longer loved by the one person you need.. then you feel empty.. i love all you guys with all my heart.. but i cant take another heart break ever again. i am not naming names... he knows who he is.. and i said i was fucking sorry.. you never really did love me and thats the shit that hurts the most... but you know what i dont care anymore.. everyone can walk all over me... i dont give a shit... WALK ALL OVER ME PEOPLE!!! just do it you know you wantto.... fuck it.. im sooo tired of this.. i have sooooo many friends yet when i fall in love with a person its alllllllllll about fucking looks aint it.... WELL FUCK THAT! my looks are going to be 6 fucking feel under. whats wrong with being a little chubby?? its fucked up how the world bases the biggest shit on little details... you go out and marry some hot chick.. but what is she gonna look like is 50 years??? well she will look old just like the rest of the people her age and you wont know whose who.. the reason people should love each other is because of personality... thats why i loved the person that broke my heart... but noooo... im chubby... well you know what i dont give a shit if im chubby.. im still a good person.. im never mean unless you make me.. and sure i get depressed and say that im not good enough for anyone... but in acctuallity.. the only reason i say that is to be reassured that you still love me. i mean come on now we all do it every once and a while... but im just getting tired of the people i love leaving me cause i have a few extra pounds.. you knowwhat fuck that... im gonna stay "plump" and i dont care who likes it and who doesnt.. thats me.. so im sorry for those who i disappointed..
i got bored yesterday... so sue me!!!
Written about Friday 2005-07-15
Written: (7070 days ago)
i know what i did,
and its cant be fixed.
i made you cunfussed,
and your feelings mixed.
i broke a line,
that should nave never been broken.
i should have staysed away,
i never should have spoken.
i fuined your life,
which once was great.
i messed with you head,
but now its too late.
i have to finish,
what i started last night.
i have to end it,
and you must not fight.
i have to leave,
i can no longer stay.
im breaking slowly,
with nothing to say.
Written about Wednesday 2005-07-13
Written: (7072 days ago)
hmmm have you ever had the feeling that no one loves you??? hmmm well i do.. i feel it right now.. it sucks big balls. but i guess it will pass. heres my suicide poem incase anyone wanted to read it before i die.
ill leave this note,
and let my life go.
ill kill myself now,
and hope its not too slow.
ill cut my wrists,
until i bleed.
ill take some pills,
as many as i need.
i feel my mind slipping,
into the tub i will fall.
my body starts to go numb,
my heart feels so small.
it all goes dark,
i guess from here im dead.
is this what death feels like?
to have no thoughts in your head.
life was brutal,
but i cut is short.
im sorry about this,
but it was my last resort.
hmmm... someone hurt me sooo bad to the point that i have gone through 3 marble notebooks in the past 2 weeks.. i filled the mall with poems... i write alot when im hurt. soooo yea.. ill post some of my new work on here later... but for now if you want to see my old stuff.. go to jenn's poetry
Written about Sunday 2005-07-03
Written: (7082 days ago)
hmm ok maybe he doesn like me!!! HEHE!