[midnight toker]'s diary

718642  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-12-20
Written: (6721 days ago)
Next in thread: 718645

this is a fun riddle


there once was a man on london bridge who tipped his hat and drew his cane and in this riddle i said his name what is it

683524  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-10-17
Written: (6785 days ago)
Next in thread: 713191

this is fucked up

this is seconds cat
this is forty cat
this is for cat
this is busy cat
this is retards cat
this is keep cat
this is to cat
this is how cat
this is is cat
this is this cat





now go back and read the third word from each line bottom to top

666133  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-09-15
Written: (6817 days ago)
Next in thread: 675642

these jokes are funny and gross you have been warned


a plane crashes on a island. there was 3 survivers. they here a voice that says "search the island for fruits and bring them back here". So they go out and search the island when the first guy gets back he brings apples. the voice says "you must shove 3 up your butt without laughing or feeling pain so he shoves 2 up his butt and he feels pain so he was shot and killed. the 2 guy comes back with berries. The voice says "you must shove 3 up your but without feeling pain or laughing so he shoves 2 up his butt and he starts laughing so he was shot and killed. The first guy tells the second guy (in heaven) "why did you have to start laughing you had berries" and the second guy say i started laughing because i saw the third guy come back with pineapples"

its holloween and a guy goes in for an opperation and the nurse gives him some tranquillizers and says "this might give you diaria" so after the opperation was done he goes to the restroom 3 times all false alarms and so the next time he has to go he decides to stay put. The next time he felt like he had to go he stayed put and a stream of bottly fluids and what not came flying out onto his sheets so thinking quickly and not wanting to get embaresed he throws the sheets out the window and they land on a bum passing by so after punchin, hooting and hollerin for a while the sheets are around his feet and a gaurd who saw the whole thing comes over and says "what seems to be the problem" and the bum says "i think i just beat the shit out of a ghost".

tell me what you think

658149  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-09-02
Written: (6830 days ago)

the song that will never go away

   gorillaz clint eastwood


 oh oh oh oh oh

 hey, im happy im feeling glad i got sunshine in a bag im useless but not for long the future is coming on

hey, im happy im feeling glad i got sunshine in a bag im useless but not for long the future is coming on its coming on, its coming on
(rah, yeah)
its coming on its coming on

Finally some one let me out of my cage now time for me is nothin' cos im countin no age now i couldnt be there now you shouldnt be scared im good at repairs and im under each snare intangible (ah y'all) i bet you didnt think so i cammand you to, panoramic view (you) ill make it all manageable pick and choose, sit and lose all you different crews. chicks and dudes who you think is really kickin tunes
Picture you gettin down in a picture tube like you lit the fuse. you think its fictional, mystical-maybe spiritual hero who appears to clear your view when you too crazy lifeless for those a definition of what life is. Priceless to you because i put you on that hype shift you like it gun smokin righteous but one talkin' psychic among knows posses you with one though

hey im happy im feeling glad i got sunshine in a bag im useless but not for long the future is coming on

hey im happy im feeling glad i got sunshine in a bag im useless but not for long the future is coming on its coming on its coming on its coming on

The essence, the basics without it you make it Allow me to make this child like in nature rythm you have it or you dont thats a fallacy im in them every sprout and tree, every child of peace, every cloud and sea, you see with your eyes you destruction and demise (thats right) curruption in the skies from this fucking enterprise that im sucked into your lies through russell not his muscles but percussion he provides

with me as your guide y'all can see me now cause you dont see with your eye you perceive with mind thats the end (fuck em) So im gona stick around with russ and be a mentor bust a few rhymes of motherfuckers remember what the thought is i brought all this so you can survive when law is lawsless (right here)
Feeling, sensations that you thought was dead no squealing, remember its all in your head

  i aint happy, im feeling glad i got sunshine in a bag im useless but not for long my future is coming on is coming on

my future is coming on is coming on is coming on
my future is coming on is coming on is coming on

638894  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-04
Written: (6859 days ago)

Poetry from [^_^ bubi et ^_^]'s house

Roses are red,
Violets are corny,
When I think of you
Ohh baby I get horny,
Eat me, Beat me, Bite me,
Blow me, Suck me, Fuck me,
Very slowly, if you kiss me,
dont be sassy, Use your tongue
and make it nasty!!!!


Sex is like math
You add the bed
Subtract the clothes
Divide the legs
And I hope you dont multiply!!!



Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But whips and chains excite me.
So throw me down
And tie me up,
And show how much u like me!!!



Sex is not the answer!
Sex is the question!!
Yes is the answer!!!



Roses are red
Violets are blue
Condoms break
So watch who you screw!!!



Have fun in the sun
Get laid in the shade


Roses are red
violets are blue
Aids are contagious
So watch who you screw!!!



Happy happy, joy joy, im your kinky sex toy, beat me, bite me, make me scream, kinky sex is all i need.


this isnt poetry but its funny

FUNNY STUFF!!!


Girl: "Forgive me father for I have sinned."


Priest: "What have you done my child?"


Girl: "I called a man a son of a bit**."


Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bit**?"


Girl: "Because he touched my hand."


Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)


Girl: "Yes father."


Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bit**."


Girl: "Then he touched my breast."


Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)


Girl: "Yes father."


Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bit**."


Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, father."


Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)


Girl: "Yes father."


Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bit**."


Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."


Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you
know where)


Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!"


Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bit**."


Girl: "But father he had AIDS!"


Priest: "THAT SON OF A BIT**!!!"





Repost if you laughed

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