[Eliraven]'s diary

1169706  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2015-11-24
Written: (3290 days ago)

I guess people realized that wiki formatting is not that great. But the idea of this place still encourages my inner child. I suppose this has to do with my timing and age, growing up in the 90s and experiencing a first of a rapid incline in technology. And not without a keen interest. Feels as though there may still be a small community of creatures roaming about these old, dusty pages I once sought refuge in. Ode to the days of old, but memories which house my inner self. Inner demons? I hope not. I know better after I've given it some thought. Wishes and dreams do come true. It's the first lesson in magic, if you think it, it's true. At first a lesson given life through the logical saying commonly heard while I was young, "If you think you're wrong, you're right. If you think you're right, you're right." In the context of an emotional or moralistic dilemma requiring a choice, perhaps commonly an ultimatum with limited options, this phrase quickly found root among my thought processes. This feature of my development as a child contributes largely to my abstract, macro, holistic perspective of the world and thus, life.

I personally believe that in deep meditation with a focus on memory and your energy drawing creativity, all fueled by desires and light, that it is possible to modify your past. Change your reality and affect your existence from your very core and out into the world you experience. This occult practice has guided me to being the person I want to be. Comfortable in my skin and prepared to face that which was once feared or overcoming of my will.

The phrase teaches me that my perspective is my reality. My decisions are influenced truly NOT by logic, by reason, or by the influences around me both tangible and mental. My primal reaction to worldly circumstances is an expression that comes after what I believe to be my reality. A filter acting as a guiding path by which my energy flows. If I believe that what I do or say will achieve my desired outcome, or when the question is present whether or not the decision that I could make is morally correct or "wrong", what first determines the outcome is simply my belief.


Attribute this ability to memories and you can change your past. You may influence your future, and by mastering these skills you will actually be in control of your consciousness - your reality. Now.

I used to describe to my brethren that all of life and existence and the infinite conceivable paths of life by snapping my fingers together. Instant instance of infinite existence. Did I say anything about macro thinking?

I used to describe my perspective as if to drive a car of which the windshield were my eyes, and I was sitting behind the seat experiencing the world around me as I drove by. This developed to my consideration that I was like a planet revolving around the sun, where the sun is my life as a third-person perspective similar to the common video game. I should mention that with this perspective came a slight lacking in the level of control I possessed over my reality. This was during a time in my life where I was coming of age. Life was much less controllable then for me. Now I am back in the driver's seat, only now my vehicle is more aetheric and my reality much easier to assimilate and influence.

I have developed the realization that we are not separate from the world, yet we are so purely individual in all that we experience, perceive and do. We exist independently as our own forms yet ever changing and adapting, giving and taking, forcing and being forced, sharing and oh my goodness always exchanging! Never ceasing - perhaps what keeps us alive in a conscious versus subconscious ideal.

One must not stop giving when the world gives you so much to take in. Our light may dim when the wind blows, and we may decide to allow the resistance to put out the flame. It's much easier to rest. To give in and allow the forces to just take control. Stop worrying about being bright and producing (thus experiencing) life for yourself. It can be hard but we can stay alive.

Be ever fascinated by life and do not allow external forces to control too much of your individual energy. Instead spend more time giving out into the world and you will realize that your life energy is expanding as it reaches out. Some majestic force is creating more energy than it is using up - which scientifically seems to be impossible. Not to be replicated by the technology that so thoroughly consumes us, making our lives "easier" and relieving the pressure of forceful requirements to achieve comfort. Shortcuts that enable the mind to perform more efficient production than when preparation and strategy dictate your successes.

Hmmmmmmm......

Where does time fall into all of this.

*update*

edited this post for a solid 10 minutes but lost it all due to misclicking. I believe I was relaly on to something, and I also noticed some of the writing above is not coherent in it's current form. Allow me time to edit this in the future, when I may better produce such things.

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