O.o Dewa. How do I go about explaining this? I've just received the best compliment ever. You see, there's this song called "Right Here In My Arms" that Yesu said "It's cool, it reminds me of you." Okay. I'd never heard the song before. Aparently it's on a CKY soundtrack or something; I don't know, I don't watch it. Anyway. So I'm looking for it, and I can't find it. So I go online, on LimeWire to see if it's there by some weird twist of fate. And it is. So I'm downloading it. Then I go hunting for the lyrics because I'm impatient. And I find them. And read them. And melt into the floor.

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/him/righthereinmyarms.html

I must be looking particularly sexy today. I went to meet my mom for lunch, then went window-shopping at the mall. And every store I went into where there was a male working, he was falling all over himself to ask me if I was finding everything okay. So I'm either looking better than usual or I look like I've got lots of money. Although if I had lots of money I probably wouldn't be wearing a tank top and beat-up blue jeans, with my hair in a sloppy ponytail. I don't know. Maybe...I don't know. But it made me feel good. ^_^

Went to physical therapy for my back this morning. Gah!!! Now it hurts worse than it did before! But I have a normal range of movement now, so I guess I don't mind a little ache here and there. Gotta go back again next week...and Mr. Physical Therapist Man said something about getting me a prescription (muscle relaxants perhaps?) for my neck. O.o Alrighty. Didn't think it was that bad, but if he wants to give me happy drugs then he can go right ahead. ^_^

Second day at work! They gave me a ticketbook, but no apron yet. I don't think they have any to spare. And I think I was still supposed to be following Maria around, but she would be taking one table's order and more people would be seated, so I went over and took care of them. (That's actually what we have to say when we approach a table: "Hi, my name's _______, and I'll be taking care of you today.") I didn't mess anything up, so Maria was like, "Okay, well, carry on then." So I took orders and called orders and ran food and refilled drinks and pre-bussed tables and put more paper on tables once they'd been bussed. (We don't have tablecloths...we have brown butcher paper, with crayons on the tables so you can draw on it if you want.) And once it slowed down in our area, I helped other people. I ran food and refilled drinks and brought to-go boxes for folks that Heather didn't feel like dealing with. It was fun. The last guy I waited on was kinda scary, he ordered an entree and two beers right off the bat, then another beer when I went back to check on him (before he had finished the second one). I figure he must have lost his dog or his job or his wife or something, because who goes to a restaurant and orders three beers? I mean, if he had been at the bar it wouldn't have seemed so strange, but he sat in a booth in the non-smoking section and looked out the window all forlorn while drinking his beers. Maria told me that he looked like he didn't want to be bothered, so -I- could check on him and give him his ticket since -I- was his waitress. He didn't get rude or anything. He was very courteous, as a matter of fact. I clocked out after giving him his ticket and pre-bussing his table, so I don't know if he left a tip or not. (I'm not "officially" waiting tables yet, so I don't get to keep tips - even if the people hand them to me personally. Once I've taken my test and gone to orientation, I'll be able to keep tips. But for now, Maria gets them.)

I think that's all...got work again Sunday (11 am, gah!) but I don't mind. I enjoy it, and church folks are pretty nice. Except the old ones. Old church people get downright rude. But that's when you smile and go back to the kitchen, where you cuss them while you're fixing whatever they say is wrong. ^_^ And...let's see...Yesu and Stevie and Dante and Morgan and the rest of the crew are on spring break the week after I take the test and go to orientation, so I'll be waiting tables on my own for the first time that week. Oh, that's loovely. Because I know they'll come up there. And ask specifically to be seated in my area. And Stevie will make it a point to be difficult and unpleasant to deal with. And then I'll get fired for giving a customer a healthy smack upside the head. ^_^

Well, I guess that's all. A bientot!

Okay! Where do I start?

I went to Wesleyan for Pioneer Weekend. Got to stay in the dorms and all. It was neat. I'm so excited about going there! I was diggin' the bookstore. Got a visor that says "Wesleyan College - Macon, GA" and a pair of athletic shorts that say "WESLEYAN" across the butt. They're great. ^_^

Today was my first day at work. I'm in "training" so I have to follow Maria around. After about thirty minutes I was like, "Give me an apron and a little ticket book thingie and let me do it! I'm just getting in the way following her around, and I know what to do!" But I had fun. It's not as bad as I thought it would be.

MWAHAHAHA! I pushed over the first domino yesterday! *grins mischeivously* Hehehe. Oh, and it was lovely. So lovely. Gotta find a way to see him again...

I GOT A JOB! Woohoo! *dances* Granted, it's as a waitress at Country's Barbecue, but it's a job. That makes money. And a buttload in tips if I play my cards right. ^_^ The rednecks that frequent Country's will drop serious cash if their red-hair-in-a-ponytail-wearing-tight-jeans-and-a-Southern-accent waitress does even a halfway decent job, as long as she smiles. A lot. The only job that makes better tips (well, aside from stripping, of course) is working as a waitress at a truck stop. Because truckers are very lonely men. They'll leave you a $20 tip for serving them a $5 pot of coffee. (Voice of experience!) SO! I'm looking forward to it. I start next Monday. Wish me luck? I have to try and be perky at 9 in the morning, but I think I can pull it off. ^_^ And maybe I'll make enough in tips my first few days to pay the $70 retainer fee on a dress that I've been lusting after. (Yeah, me in a dress. A formal dress, at that. Go figure.) I'll see if I can get a picture of me trying it on at the store, then I'll put it up so y'all can see it. It is gorgeous. And it actually fits! (Okay, it has to be hemmed about 4 or 5 inches, but otherwise it fits.) Most of the dresses I tried on were either way too long or way too tight in the waist or way too big in the bust. Who do they make these things for? Twiggy? I don't think I have EVER met a girl who is 5'10" with a 23" waist and D cups. I think the designers must be either men with seriously out-of-touch-with-reality sexual fantasies or women who are grotesquely abnormal freaks of nature. There's no way. But anyhow! This one fits in the waist and bust and is only about 5 inches too long...actually, when you factor in the high heels, it's only about 3 inches too long. So I'm good to go. As soon as I get the money. It's $140, and I have to give them $70 to make sure they don't sell it to someone else, then I can pay the other half over time. So I'm gonna be busting my butt at work. I'm gonna smile till my face hurts and be so perky I can't stand myself. But it'll be worth it. It is a GORGEOUS dress. ^_^

I saw my ex yesterday. This is a song I wrote when I got home from seeing him. Gods, that was depressing...

_________________________________________________________
"A Certain Shade of Grey"

I saw you today
I thought the memories had gone away
Cause I've been trying so hard to forget about you
But it's all in vain
I felt you today
I felt your presence all in that place
And I remembered all the things I love about you
Your smell, your touch, your words, your taste
And let's play a game of make-believe
Pretend we are like we used to be
Back before I felt trapped and scared
And you began to doubt that I ever cared
But I loved you then
Like I love you still
And I can try to forget these feelings for you
But I don't think I ever will
I missed you today
I missed the things that you used to say
Cause even though you're standing right here by me
You're a million miles away
I mourned you today
I mourned the family we could have been
Cause I can see that you're moving on
It's my own damn fault, I can't ask you to stay
But let's play a game of make-believe
Pretend we are like we used to be
Back before I felt trapped and scared
And you began to doubt that I ever cared
But I loved you then
Like I love you still
And I can try to forget these feelings for you
But I don't think I ever will
I saw you today
I thought the memories had gone away
Cause I've been trying so hard to forget about you
But it's all in vain

I'm so sick of being "one of the guys." *dances around naked* I'm female! See? Female! Lots and lots of estrogen! Lacking in external genitalia! What's wrong with my friends?! The only friends I have that even notice that I'm a girl are gay, and they only notice because they're irritated with me for being female - "Why do you have to be a girl, you'd make such a cute guy, I would so hit on you if you were a guy." GRRR!

IS THERE NOWHERE ONLINE THAT I CAN BUY A DECENTLY PRICED WAND THAT IS NOT A CHEAP HARRY POTTER RIP-OFF????? *flares nostrils and bares teeth & claws*

Has anyone else noticed that there are a whole lot more girls than guys here in Elftown?

I went to see "Darkness Falls" a few weeks ago. Scared the bejesus out of me. I mean, I still have trouble sleeping with the light off. Creepy stuff! And now Morgan wants me to go see "The Ring" with him. Has he lost his bloomin' everlovin'?! I'm usually okay with scary movies. CREEPY movies are different. He's off his gourd if he thinks I'm about to sit through a creepy movie in a dark theater with someone who's already seen it. No. I'm not gonna be the only one that's terrified.

I had heard "All the Things She Said" on the radio. Pretty cool. Then I see the video. ...Interesting. So I go looking for the lyrics. Reminds me of my Lishabet. Then I find pictures. Good god. Lots of yummy Russian goodness. Those are two very much attractive young ladies. So now I'm a huge t.A.T.u. fan.

It's been a week now. I'm hanging in there, but it's tough. Maybe it'll get easier with time.

I was not aware that the cab of a Chevy Silverado could hold five teenage boys. Some of my friends came to see me today - well, rather, Yesu wanted to see me, Steve has a vehicle, and three more of them decided to tag along. Made me feel better, I haven't seen them since last Friday. (Yesu is my cosmic twin, not getting to see him is like not having the use of one side of my body.)

Anyway...I guess I don't really have much else to talk about.

Oh! My friend Jessie is having a hard time with her pregnancy, so if you're the praying type, please keep her in your thoughts. Thanks!

Wow, what all has happened that I can write about?

I've been accepted at Wesleyan. YAY! I'm really relieved, I didn't apply anywhere else and I would be very much screwed if I didn't get in. Now I have to try and get scholarships and stuff, but thankfully it isn't that expensive a school. (I was surprised - a private women's college, you'd think it'd be exorbitant.)

And one of my poems (a personal favorite, too) has been selected for publication. I'm really excited about that, too, because I fancy myself a halfway decent poet.

What else...I should be making entries fairly regularly, because I'm not allowed to go back to school (doctor's orders) for another 5 weeks. I'm going stir-crazy, but I'll live.

More good news! Armand turned out to be a cute little boy after all. Brown-blond hair with red highlights and big brown eyes, 7 pounds 7 ounces, 20 inches long. I'm so glad he isn't ugly, I was really worried. And he's not fussy either. A perfect baby...and I don't even like little babies, go figure.

Well, that's all for now.