In seven minutes I am going to have my first arabic class.. tihi...
Hm, life is not so great anymore. I'm in love..again. And beeing in love means artistic block du lux (for me at least). On top of being slightly depressed I do not find the will to either draw, write or even play 'post by post' roleplays. Thank godness I still read.. I have begun "The redemption of Althalus" again.. I kinda like that book...
Well, well. Life is just great. I've been to my first LARP evver, and I had such a great time... This Larp, named Elencalion Formen, was acctually moved 'till next year, but we were 16 people showing up and having fun either way. There were no plot, and it was really fun, the more expiriensed player said that it acctually happend more on this larp than on many plot based ones and they had more fun because they could play their role in a diffrent way, without having to think about the plot...I don't know, but I know I had a great time..
Today I have been viciting the place where I'll work this summer. It is a museum, and it is not that bad. The main building is from arond 1800 and the smaller one from 1600. Both are filled up with old stuff...
Let me give all of you an advice, do not and I repest do NOT start reading Stoker's Dracula half past one in the night, when you are the last to go to bed in your house and you have the window open. I did, not fun, but at the same time it was.. But it is not that the first pages are very scary, becasue they are not, but you know what is coming and that scare me...
Apart from a nights bad sleep, today I have done notthing, it was one of those day when all you do is reading in the sun.. I love those days...
Well, well. Toady we get to know what subject we will have an exam in. In norway you have two exams, one where you write the answers on a paper and one where you speak.. In writing,which we are having next week, we can get ecomonics, english or math. I do not know what I want to get. Well, I have to go now, I'll write more later...
Later:
Weewwee, we have no exam comming up. You see that was the fourth option, no exam... And guess what we got... I have a whole week of. No school, no exams, oh I feel great.
I have dicied to ask this question more often: "Why?" I belive that I can not think for poeple, nobody can, but I can try to kick them in the right derection and one of the way to do that is to make then come up with reasons for things...
Apart from that: I have just been a week to Estiona and Russia. And if I never visit Talinn or St. Petersburg again.. well, let's just say that I really want to see more of both cities. So citizens of Talinn and St. Petersburg be proud of your cities, they are amazing...
Well, my homepage is finally comming together. The only problem is that I only have time to work on it here at school and all the things I want up is at home... If you want to take a look at it here's the address http://www.geo
Well, well, well, rugby is fun people. At least the way em and my freinds play. 6 girls, one ball, no rules. Itis very good for getting anger out, the only problem is that we should have been more that 3 on each team. And the should have been boys to, it is more fun to play with boys because they aren't afraid of hurting you, at least they arn't afraid of hurting me. And that makes the game much rougher, which is fun...
Apart from that: on friday i am going to Estonia and Russia for a week, looking forward to that, but not to the bus ride from Shoutheren Norway to Stockholm... Too many hours in a bus with a lot people I don't like. Fortunally a lot of my freinds are going too...
Back again at school after the weekend from hell. First Friday, Dugnad (as far as I know there are no english word for this, but it means working for free because you are a member), and stable when I got home around 21.00.. And it wasn't even my day (me and my brother have weekdays when we clean out the stable and feed the horses (and before anyone say, oh so lucky you are having horses, let me just tell you that cleaning out the stable is quite litturaly a, and I am going to a nother nowegian word, møkka jobb (a lttle bit worse that drit job)). Saturday Dugnad again and now it meant standing strait for nine hours selling stuff...
Sunday up at 05.00 for my aunt's konfirmasjon(comming of age is the english word I belive. Back home again at 23.00
And today I jhad a five hour norwegian end of year test about norwegian littrature history.. ehe... fun...
Ahhh, English end of year test over, 12 a4 pages written,my arm hurts. I wrote 4 pages about the choice between public and state school in England and Wales. Fun...
Well, people. Here I am again, at school after it is over... This time it is because of some leadership work... Rule the world is no longer at the top of my jobs-I-want-to
"Happy Birthday Tonje" From Snow and Tiger.
Well, as you see I have birthday today. I honestly don't have time to say much more, school starts soon. Just wanted to remind you all, I am indeeed helpless..*gri
Ok, I'm in love again. i'm helpless. A year ago I met this guy on a vacation I was on and fell in love with him, and then during the summer I forgot him, or at least I got him out of my head. I had a wonderful time with him and a lot of other people I got to know. Then today,when it has been well over a year since I last saw him, I found a picture... And I fell. Again. Well, apart from the fact that I probaly won't be meeting him again, beeing in love is great.
Well, apart from beeing in love, I don't feel so good. School started again and we are having a project about Estiona. And my group isn't that good, I hate being on this groups with people who won't work.
Well, a lot have happend since I last wrote in my diary. I've been to a school interveiw in Oslo, and spent a weekend with my familiy in Asker (a place close to Oslo(Oslo is the capitol of Norway for those of you who did not know)). I came home. I got the letter saying thet I got a place at one of the UWCs, not the one I wanted, but a UWC is a UWC. I accepted the place today.
I just got home from getting my sister bach to Harstad where she lived, acctually we drove her to the airport. i miss her already. yet it is weird having her here, I am not used to having a sister...
Apart from thet not much have happed, I've had vacation, as have the rest of the world I think. But I have done a new selfprotrait, it is at my member house, please take a look and tell me what you think. I need a massage or a guest book notice, I feel lonely...
Ah, new day, new beginning and even better it is friday. The only bad thing is an two hour french test later today. I may seem a bit overfocused on french, but the thing is that is a new lanuage to me, I started with is this year. And the other laguages I have, english, norwegian and german, well I use english just as much as I use norwegian, my motherlaguange
Spring has fiannly come to southern norway, at last. The snow is melting, life could not be more perfect....
Weee, my oldersister came to visit us yesterday, and she is going to stay for almost 3 weeks. Wonderful, I have been missing her.
And parhaps I get back a poem I made in norwegian, I wonder what my teacher thinks about it, i certainly like it. Well, I'll write more later today(If I have enough time..)
I am feel like I could fly this day as by far been the best so far in the year.
3 reasons why:
1. I got to kick one of my teachers butts today, god I hate that man. Am i sceard him, weee..
2. We had electrisity in sience today and I acctually got the lamp to work, Go nerds! It is very fun to build something and watch it work...
3 and biggest reason: I am accesepted to an interveiw at UWC(united world college).
And I saw one of the biggest birds I have ever seen today, An eagle I guess and propbaly over 1,5 meter (roughly 5 feet unless I am terrible mistaken) between that wingtips, that's big in norwegian standards...
So I feel great....
Sooo. Here I am agian, at school after we're finish. this sems to be that place I sends a lot of my afternoons now... You see my mom is a teacher and I can drive home with her and I get free internet..Weee
Well poeple here are the story "Hallelujah." Two things you should know:1 this story is very sad and deppresing, do not read it is you just have lost someone dear to you. 2 the song/poem is not mine, it is a song, named Hallelujah (big surpirse) and it appears in Shrek. I don't remember the artist (if someone do please tell me).. Well, enjoy...
Hallelujah
”I’ve heard there was a secret cord
That David played, it pleased the Lord
But you don’t really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing hallelujah”
The song you loved, yet now you are not here to love anymore. I miss you, my hole body scream and ache for you, yet I can’t scream here, in your funeral. You are not living anymore, they killed you because of who you loved, they killed you because of me. Because of me, I can never be hole again, I loved you and I was the reason they killed you.
”Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah.”
Hallelujah, praise the Lord. They killed you in the name of god. You never did anything wrong except to love. Yet God gave them right to kill, what right? You were strong and you fought for me, for our love and what a horrible price you paid. I wish we had never met, then you would be alive. I wish it were me who had died that night.
God is love they say. What god gives people right to kill, just because someone loves. I don’t understand, I never will. Yet you did, I’ll try for you. I’ll try to forgive them for what they did, like you would. I’ll try to understand, like you would.
”Your fait was strong, but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty
In the moonlight
Overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne
She cut your hair
And from you lips she drew the hallelujah”
Remember when we first met, a couple of years ago. I sat there in that bar, alone, feeling miserable, my last lover had left me. In you came, light haired and beautiful, like an angel. I remember it like yesterday, yet it feels like an eternity ago. You asked what was wrong, I told you. You smiled and said you knew how I felt, and just then I felt like a drowning person seeing a lifeline. You were my lifeline.
”Hallelujah, Hallelujah.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah.”
Just weeks after we met, I moved to your place. A wonderful flat, huge and full of Egyptian stuff. Stuff I had never seen before. Then you taught me about the Egyptian, about their life and afterlife. They were a great interest of yours, and became one of mine. I’ve never seen you so happy as the time we went to Egypt, you were in an absolute ecstasy. You told me this had been a wish of yours since before you could remember. To me you looked like an Egyptian prince, beautiful, strong and almighty. Never before had I let anybody have that grip on me, but you got it without ever having to claim it. And then we got back home to this sad, old hell of hatefulness that everybody seems to carry inside his or her harts. Why couldn’t they accept that we were not like them, why had they to try to shape us.
”Maybe I’ve been here before
I know this room, I’ve walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you
I’ve seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah.”
One day I went to some of my old stuff, and then I found it. The razor blade, once I always carried it. It made me feel safe to know that I could end it if I wanted to. Some cut themselves, I never did. I’m too much of a sissy. I fear pain, yet I was in love with it, to sorts of pain, one making deeper wounds than the other. Then you came along, and I, I put the escape route away. Who need to escape when they had some one strong enough to carry them? You had been strong ’till that day. The comment we got that day made me doubt, and I, weak as I am, I pleased the razor blade in my pocket.
”Hallelujah, hallelujah
hallelujah, hallelujah.”
That night after you had fallen asleep, I got out of bed. I never cut myself; I could make wounds that went much deeper, that never healed and never will. And therefore I sat there in the window, watching the moon and the stars, hating myself. Why had I gotten you into this, this world of hate?
”There was a time you’d let me know
What’s real and going on below
But now you never showed it to me, do you?
Remember when I moved in you?
The holy dark was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah.”
The next morning when you found me, I lied to you. You never thought I could lie to you, it was the first time. I said the moon had been beautiful, that nothing in the whole world is as beautiful as a full moon. You laughed and moved closer, saying that you knew one thing, me. Your lips were so soft and warm, it felt like life was flowing back into me. And I knew you loved me and I hated myself for pulling you down here.
”Hallelujah, hallelujah
hallelujah, hallelujah.”
Never had I suspected that their hate would grow this strong. I believed that they had at last some respect for life. They did not. I cannot forgive them, what they did is unforgivable. You used to say that their hate would be their doom. That they would never feel real love.
”Maybe there’s a god above
And all I ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
It is not a cry you can hear at night
It’s not somebody who’s seen the light
It’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah.”
I can almost hear you voice sing with the choir. I can’t stand this. I get up and walk out of the room. Up the stairs, to the church bell. As I stand there in the open window, they come out with your casket, they walk slowly over the yard. I lift my eyes to the sky, wanting the sun to burn my eyes away, so I never have to see them again, and then I see you there, among the clouds. Those wings fit you perfectly; I always said you were an angel. Your hand reach toward me as I clime out of the window and jump into you arms…
”Hallelujah, hallelujah
hallelujah hallelujah
hallelujah hallelujah
hallelujah hallelujah…”
Well, well well. Been back at sckool for about two weeks. Today we had a visitor from South Africa. Really interesting.
On the artside: I've started doing a serie of drawings for my own personal letter paper (it that an english word? arg, whatever, you know the type of paper you write on when you write letters...) inspired by norse mythology. So far I have done 'Midgardsormen
On the bookprosject side: I've finished a story called 'Hallelujah' I'll post it as soon at I get sround to do it. And I've started making a new world and everything for a couple of characters to play around in, we'll see where that goes...