Hiya i'm back!
You're proberbly wondering why i haven't been on in about 4 days. Well let me tell ya. This is from my 'diary'.

The update!
Seems like my life has it's ups and downs. It really does! Mom wants to kick me out of the house (again) if i don't finnish my job tomorrow!! She also took away the internet! That's sooo mean! I miss everyone so much. What a bitch she can be sometimes! That's just sick of her to do. She knows how much i love to talk to my friends.
Meanwhile, i saw Lenn today (i know him for about a year, he's awsome :P. Don't think i'm in love with him, he has a gf ((She's too nice! <3)) But Lenn is just a really good friend from me.) Anyway, i was so happy seeing him again! I hanged out with him and his friends for a while, so i made new friends XD. I'm so happy about that. And i'm happy about the new skatecourse behind my house of course, the people who skate there are really nice too. It's so awsome to watch them!
But still, it really bothers me that mom wants to kick me out again. I mean, i grew up there! I have so many precious memories about my house. Bad or good, they still are precious to me. I don't want to leave this place that i know so well. I'm so afraid that i will have to. Then i'll have to live at my dads, and i don't really want that. Cause then i'll be even more alone (also my dad works late, but with mom my friends are closer and the places where i hang out). I love this place so much. If i go, what can't i leave behind?
- Buffy ( if my sweet cat doesn't come along i'll get sick of missing him).
- Photo's (Yes memories)
- Books (i love to read, besides i can't leave behind my collection of manga's either.)
- my drawings (my own work)
- letters ( i always keep my letters i got from friends, with the stuff. Like the letters i got from Colin [Avatar] and Kadri [snow_sheep])
- clothes (of course, mainly my favorite)
- precious stuff ( like i got a stuffed cow ((Really cute!!)) from Lenn, my manga stuff, souvernirs, and so on. You know small stuff that you adore and have special meanings for you)
- underwear/socks (well this speaks for itself)
- cd's (can't be without music)
- Stuff needed (like my hairbrush, my toothbrush. you know that kinda stuff)
Hmm, i can cry easily now. This is so hard. Mom only get's more and more sick of me by the minute. It doesn't really matter what i do. Colin [Avatar] i tried everything i could! I used up your tips, all of them! They worked but for a really (really) short time. I'm afraid, that even if i do my job (finnishing it that is). I'll get kicked out for another reason...
Ever since Jara's and Dukkie's death, things only seemed to get worser. Though times. (Jara and Dukkie were a dog and a cat and really precious to us.)
All i do is try to stay positive. Try to see things the good way. But a part of me can't help but feeling sad about it.
If mom really wants me out, if that really is what makes her happy. Then i'll do it. For i no matter what my she does to me, i still want her to be happy. Cause i love her. Even if it would mean that she would be happy without me.
I'm going to sleep now, but not before i've cuddled buffy. He's the only one who really makes me smile in this house. He supports me by not leaving my side, he follows me to where-ever i go.
Please, do not worry about me. As long as you are here with me. All of you. I'll be fine and there will be no way things will go wrong. Cause all of you, all who i love and cherish so dearly. You give me hope.
Thank you so much for that. Thank you.
-Shinobu.

Yeh that's what i wrote. I already planned when i wrote it to put it here so that's why the thank you part is in it. Heh. Everything is getting better now. I think mom just is having a though time again. And as always she takes it out on me ^^;. Heh well this is about all ^^.
I love you!
-Shinobu

((Steve i miss you! ><))

*Has just realized that Steve might just be at school.*
Ermm i'm gonna go... Really i can't even stand normally. (Night before has been late too and she got up early)
Love yous all!
Cya tomorrow then Steve ^^
XxxxxxxX
Have sweet dreams yous all!

Damn you icetea! I <3 you!!
*is drinking icetea to keep herself awake. oh and her headache is gone*
*yawns*
an hour and half to go =_=. will i make it?... Doubting it now. Since i'm practally falling off from my chair. *already fell off from it 2 times* I'm gonna close my eyes for just a sec.

Oh ow... doom?
*is afraid mom will be friggin mad at her for being on at this time*
If i'm gone really sudden. That's then cause my mom told me to, (i'm sure she has some threat for me if i don't -.-)
Heh, headache is getting worser and worser by the minute btw. Steve i'm doing this for you!! <3
My limit is 2 o'clock over here though. that's 1 o'clock at the elftown clock.
So about 3 hours >_>. Heh ^^;

*is all alone and has no-one to talk to on msn anymore*
Zzzzz I'm soo tired. *is waiting for Steve to come online*
If i don't answer i fell asleep in the chair @_@. Could be that my mom would come downstairs furious at me for not being in bed >_>. Like i care -_-.
I'm so tired, and getting a headache so it seems. *is listening to music and leaning on the table*
I'm gonna sleep now on the table*
cya in a little while.

Muhhahahaha! I'm listening to music all day long! And the volume is very (VERY) high ^^
I'm all alone in the house ^^ (AGAIN!)
So i'm doing what i want ^^

Yayayay!!
Next week new photo's of meeeeeeee! (not that you want to see that but still XD) and for those who have msn. Come online and i'll send you a little movie (15 seconds) of me dancing or something :P
XxxX
-Shi

Don't you just hate it when you tell somone something. Something you want to tell someone else, and the person you told it first to you beats you to it?

FUN WITH SNOW! (this was this week on a monday ^^)

Buffy-Neko watching the snow out of my window with me's ^^.

You can see the neighbours car ^^ And my frontjard a lil bit.

Thee hee, accros my house. Again this is taken out of my window ^^.

This is right below my window ^^

Some random pictures! XD All by me!

Buffy-Kun soo cute! He's being pet by me ^^. He was purring XD.

[Hellcatje89] Coke-Can and [Super Big] Awsome Powerdrink. Cokecan was RED, and the stuff in the powerdrink was BLUE! XD

Me.. i guess >> SUCKS!

Buffy on my bed :D Soo cute! This was this morning ^^. Yesh my cat sleeps with me in my bed XD

Ain't he the cutest?! Don't mind my bed though, i mean, i got it from Greenpeace ^^. So i love it! X3

Soo smart ~.~

Hey you guy's! Hope ya all are doing good, I'm doing good myself ^^. but i won't be able to answer your messages before it's friday, sorry! My pc is toooo slow. sorry bout that. Talk to me on msn if you have it ^^.
Much love,
Shinobu

OMG!! My internet works!! Without it even being installed! O_o;;;; Scary... Ah well, i like it! :D

Oh ow... i think i deleted messages that you guys sended to me. They were the same so i deleted them... but heh ^^; i saw that you guys don't have the reply... soo...
Im so so so sorry!!! Whaaa it's so bad of me, now i lost errr abour 11 messages >_<. So sorry!

Hello!
It's me me! Yesh me, that annoying little weird girl you all know X3. Hows life treating you all? I hope good, my life is back to normal. I'm back to school *Happydance* Yeh i know... Happy to go to school X3. But well being at home for 3 days ain't much fun. So i'm happy wappy to be with my friends again. [Hellcatje89], [666satan] and [Super Big]. Those are my classmates ^^. Yayayay ^^. They know me irl XD. Must take pictures of all of us together soon ^^. Yay ^^. As you can hear, i'm super happy. That's cause my throatinfection is gone! Finally! After 8 days of less sleep, almost non eating (like something small and then half or less of my dinner at night). And all the crap that was coming along, it's all gone!!! YAY! Though i lost weight i think. i'll check tonight, cause here i can't XD. The thing is without batteries XD. Tee hee ^^. don't worry about me though, i'll gain some weight i guess ^^;.
Wuv ya all!!
:glomp:
Shinobu.

I still need to take unbelievebly grosse pills though XD.

Okay i got back from the docter, i got medicines along. If they don't work i'll have to come back since.. er... please ask me. It's nothing really bad but it's just that i'd rather tell you in person.

Finally Justice!!!
I get to go to the docter ^^. Tomorrowmorning at 09:00 X3. So i get to skip Math ^^. Yay ^^. Anyway i will find out how bad my throatinfection is >_>. I mean tomorrow it will be a week! O_o;;;. Heheh XD. That can't be good. Even drinking tea all day long (With honey) didn't help, it makes me lose weight i think, but i don't know how much i lost >_<. I won't know till or tomorrow or friday XD. Also i eat very little. Not because i force myself, no it isn't like that. I just can't eat normal, it hurts to much >_<. And i'm full easily -_-. Yesterday i ate only an orange (small one) and the half (or less) of my dinner and 4 bites of my dessert (wich is still in the fridge XD). and today about the same. Exept for i got an watericecream ^^. That worked against my throat for a little bit. But now it hurts a lot again -_-. Also tonight didn't finnished dinner. Just not able to eat normally. blegh, i want to get rid of this as quick as posible. wish me luck! Must sleep now ^^ Bye bye
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx
Shinobu ^^

Everything is Ok now ^_^. (not with the bulliying but with the problem i had with a friend of me. *has deleted that entre so you can't read back*) But i'm still asking you all to pray for me XD. Oh my throatinfection is still here -.-. It's so annoying. And i get sick of tea X3. Well that's pretty obvious since i drank like.... at least 15 cups a day.