gosh i hate my mom.. I used to live with my mom. but now i want nothing to do with her. Shes a drunk smoker. she lies to me..talks bad about everyone i love but her. She thinks the church has curpted my life..but shes the only one that has. I lived iwht her my whole life up until January. During that time she fell in love iwth at least 10 guys sence she moved out of the house with my dad 3 years before. In january...she got kicked out of her appartment and had to move in with my aunt in houston texas. She then became a sober person...even tho she still called me about everyday..and i would get into fights with her. Then she moved in with my uncle in Phonix arizonia. She then got a job and was doin really good. but still we got into fights everytime we talked. Then about 4 weeks ago she moved back. She moved in with a GUY that she met on the internet..and only wanted to use her. 1 week..she got kicked out. Moved in with a GUY that she met on the internet..this time a krack head...stole all her money..and kicked her out. then she lived in her van for a couple days..now shes livign with some random guy she met..and clames that she is in love with. she says shes gonna divorce my dad and get married. After all this im the only person in my family that believed in her. until a couple days ago..thats not all..she used to tell me she was dying..and i cried soo much for her..but still shes alive and lying..shes done so much crap to me..adn she still thinks im gonna move in psh no

lol well friday night we had gossple singers come to church...it was ubber fun cuz we danced around and stuff.sometime after taht we went home and went to sleep..but brooke came in..she lost her cell phone..so we drove all the way to the church again..called everyone she was with..no one saw it so we drove home and i found in between her seat -.- i was tired..yesterday i woke up ate..went shoppin spent 100$ on 2 pairs of jeans a jacket and some stuff from claires..then i wokred on me and sarahs puzzle. we like warsled all day. she tried to put a laxidive in my drink..and i heard it fizzin so i traded drinks...so she drank it! then we went to spencers good bye party..rico was bein mean to talisha the whole time so i yelled at him..and kidna was a jerk..but i apologized for it later..today..i woke up took chula out while callin rico..and get his happy butt up for church..som im gonna go to church then my moms hte a parent teen meeting..so.

um..nicole spent teh night a couple days ago and I GOT A NEW DOG!! her name is chula..which means like beautiful in spanish or sumtin..i got her from my friend alex..but shes not potty trained..so i ahve to..>.< its alot harder than i thought..ill take her out for 1 hour..then come back in the house..then poops..-.- im all tired and stuff..

i went to the lake with rico and edrique..and well of coarse my daddy. it was ubber fun! we swam out really deep..gawsh i loveeeeeeeeeeeeee them <3

woke up...went to eat..went shoppin..took a nap..awake again...gonna eat...and go to bed...

O.o...

wow..its all the same..

well.. ricos not mad! YAY! and..well lets see..im into puzzels..so me and sarah got a hard one...its 550 pieces..but its lik all the same color its flippin hard! oh and i watched the notebook and cried..its soo good! it makes me wanna go get married..and i had a drema that i fell in love with a cannableO.o

well its my b-day! alex came in my room at 7 and started like jumping on my bed yelling get up get up! happy birthday! and tehn he made me go jogging with him and brookey. then we went and got taco cabana..then came home and watched anchroman.i broke a cd and part of it flew in my eye! it hurts! tehn me and sarah went and saw charlie and the chocolate factory. it was funny! then brooke picked me up. at 4 i went to kodys to get all ready for our date with dom. i dressed really nice. i have a flowly black skirt..and a troquise tank top with jewls. and silver flipflops. i wore make up too :O! well he said it was gonna take longer than we thought. so we watched lion king :D and sung along. then he picked us up. and we went to this wierd place called chooby doos.. it was good tho..we talked about our weddings and stuff. tehn he was liek oh i forgot my bible so we went to his house..and i saw the megeehees walking..and i go hey look the megeehees! then i saw mannys car..
me: dom isnt that mannys car
Dom: yep
Me; whys manny here
Dom: no reason..


then we go inside and it was a big surprise party! :D it was fun :D
rico wasnt there tho..and i tried to call talisha back..and i was kinda a jerk to him..and he said he was leaving today..and i donno waht for..i hope his not mad..i feel bad now..-.-

yesterday was my b-day party! it was soo fun! me and kody went shopping! we had like a mexican type party! it was fun! then alot of ppl came over! we did the bear came from camp..and other stupid stuff..and ate..then me and kody got in a hugeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee cake fight! then we had to clean the floor..and me and kody kept falling! then we went swinnign! it was fun cuz we pushed rico angie lacey brittany and kassy in! then we all played chicken! ppl didnt leave til like 10! then the twikes stayed the night and we matched everyone up with who we think theyre gonna marry..it was fun..they matched me up with rico..lolz..

oh yeah and we were talking about what we think god is calling us to do..and he said youth pastor..and ever sence forever i wanted my husband to be a youth pastor..that be soo cool!

im learning how to play a guitar!!! yay! well..last night talisha called at 8 30ish(ricos lil sister) and i talked to her fo a while. then like ed and rico were being mean to her...and i had to yell at rico..then i talked to talisha more..then ruan started crying and rico or ed wouldnt do anything..they made it worse! so i made talisha put rico on the phone and i yelled at him telling him to put he's lil brother to bed and step up as the friken oldest..he calmed down real fast and did it..lolz..then i talked to rico til 6 in the morning. we talked about random things. he was trying to find something on tv. i kept falling asleep on the phone.
Rico- the tour da france is on..
me- ...
Rico- blaire...
Me- huh!
Rico- were you asleep?
me- *wipes drool off* no...
Rico- thats kinda cute how your falling asleep but still you dont want to go to sleep..


another time
Rico- *does weird loud thing with his nose*
Me- *jumps* AH! that scareded me!
Rico- *laughing* scareded? thats soo cute

well..so i talked to him and talisha for like 10 hours..i went to bed at 6..and woke up at 9! yes 3 hours! todays my b-day party...it should be ubber fun

im like so tired. we went to the church to move a pool table today. this thing was huge! it was sooo heavy! we had like 4 football players and still didnt move it..there was me kody brittany amber nick johnathan dom eric manny and alex! omgosh it was hard! im like so tired now..but hey we got pizza :D

me and brittany are friends again!! yay! she came over today after we did alot of work at the church...we watched white noice..then part of 28 days later..then secret ..then we went outside and the playground was all wet and we slide down and got our butts all wet! it was great fun! then we came back up and were now watching racing stirips or sumtin like that but yeah..

*sigh* ricos being weird..i hope nothings wrong..i cant take anymore pain in my life...i just got most of it out..

ashley: dude ur retarted
me: no im not
me: thats like ofesive ot the retarted kids
me: lolz
ashley: yeah ur are
ashley: lol nice
me: wait..i just made fun of my self
me: lolz
me: nvm
me: O,o
ashley: yeah u did
ashley: loser

im back from camp! yay! it was really fun! monday me lacey angie sarah and nicole rode in my dads car up to hawkins texas where the camp was! we jamed the wholeeeee way! we called ppl in other cars heading up there and sung to them! it was fun! i swear i heard the hasmterdace 10 million times that day!!! thne we got to camp and i got my cabin. it was with lacey sarha and our consler tiffany! she was soo sweet! then we walked around alot and we had worshiping and stuff..and went to dinner. We had fireworks that night cuz it was the forth of july! it was fun! it was my best forth of july! me and sarah got sooooooooooo hyper we scared ppl!!! it was funny! then we pasted out. Tuesday we had to wake up at like 7:30! then we went to breakfast and went to chapel. they told us what we were going to do. we went a serman on modesty while the guys had to stay in the chappel. they got taught how to treat a women like we should be! it was sweet. after that we went down to the pound where the zip line was and stuff like that. then we went to lunch. after lunch me and my friends went swimming. it was fun. me and rico kept dunking each other. then we went to go build our go cart and stuff.we palyed football witha bannana! it was fun. then we went to dinner. then swimming..then i changed and we went to chappel. the worhsip is just how i memebered it! fun! and crazy! then that night i prayed alot so i was tired and went in my room and passed out after chappel. Wes i woke up like at 7 cuz i wanted to take a shower in the morning. then i went to breakfast. then we went to an orphange to sing. it was fun until a creapy old lady scared the crap out of me saying im gonna die after her. then we put make up on luke in the car! it was soooooooo funny! then we dressed him up as a girl and took pics. then we went to lunch. after lunch i think i went swimming. with randy..and brooke..but they kept flipping me. we played the throw up game! then we walked around. sarah edrique johnny kaleb and nicole got pushed in the nasty pound. then i walked by my self and talked to jesselle and prayed with ehr. then i went to dinner. then i had my own bible study. everyone thought i was sad. then i went to churhc and had fun again :D then that night i stayed up for a lil bit. then i went to sleep. thursdya i woke up went to breakfast. after break fast i went to another serman..it was kinda boring..then we went and wokred on our car. i worked on our car utnil the race. i toook a breka to eat...one to chace after shannan and get in a paint fight..then i went swimming. our car was blue with 2 yellow stripes. then on the back it had a bumber sticker saying if you can read this ur too close and a licence plate that said btl cry. then we had sponcers. then we had olympics. we had to run up a hill and sutff..we didnt win. yellwo team did. then i was really tired. then we went to didnner..and i ahd a bible study..but rico came and we talked for a long time. then brooke randy and some other ppl came and we got in a pineocne fight. then me and brooke werseld. then we went in a room and palyed lil sally walker. then we went outside where we were having chappel! worship was aweoseme!!!! then we danced to freedom around the cross! i was soo tired after that..me adn rico went outside and talked..for like 3 hours. tehn we helped clean the chappel. then i went to sleep. sarah got in troble for bieng out after curfe with a guy..and she had to have an adult with her 24/7...friday mornign was our last day. and we went to breakfast. then dom said for all guys to go in the chappel as the girls pakced. then we went in there. the were to rows of the guys. and they were clappign and handed us flowers! and prayed over us! it was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sweet! i wanted to cry! rico gave me a pink rose..then prayed right over me! omgosh i love him! then we packed and the guys took our stuff to the cars for us! then my daddy came and we drove home. on the way home me kass the twins and sarh had a crazy idea. so they came over yesterday and we cooked alot! and we had a big surprise paryt for all the guys today! gosh i love life!

Me : im fallin forever*singign going under*
Me : lolz
Rico<3 : ok
Me : yep
Rico<3 : dot hit the groud
Me : lol
Me : that was kinda me
Me : mean
Me : lolz
Me : if u fall forever..then u never hit tho
Me : lolz
Rico<3 : how...i waz saying that so you woulnt get hurt hitting the ground
Me : lol thanks..

soooo last night ashely spent the night. brooke just lefted. then she called saying that there were lil kittens running around. so we went outside and tried to catch them. we chaced them around a lil bit. then finally we had one cornered. then i reached for it and accidentally got its tail. it bit me like 3 times..and scratched me too. i just lefted it and went up stairs. my finger was like covered by blood. so i washed it off. soo..thats how i got beaten by a kitten..O.o I now think theyre evil!!! lozl

im reading all the things..when me and rico loved each other alot..its sad..i wanna cry now..all that is gone now..:'(

todays suked so far.. yesterday i went to kids camp..and stubed my toe..and friken broke my mouth on chris' head. now my teeth hurt so i go home today and make soup and friken spill it on my self..and i ahve a huge burn on my leg!!! and if that dont top it off..me and rico dotn think we're that close any more..im gonna cry!

Rico<3 : y are you in a bad mood?
Me : cuz..im thinking nicole from churhc is right..
Rico<3 : wat?
Me : she doesnt think that me and your love is gonna last for 4 years..and im starting to see it to.
Rico<3 : i waz thinking that
Me : yah i know.
Rico<3 : how?
Me : i can just tell.
Rico<3 : o
Rico<3 : ok
Rico<3 : me too
Me : yeah..
Me : brb
Rico<3 : ok
Rico<3 : me too..i sew it like a sople of weeks ago...when i waz thinking about it
Me : yeah.. i know..i jsut havent told any one about it..
Me :
Me : even brooke noticed..
Rico<3 : wat?
Me : that we werent as close
Rico<3 : how?
Me : i donno..but she told me a while ago.."you guys dont seem as close anymroe"
Rico<3 : ooo
Rico<3 : i waz thinking about that
Me : ep
Me : yep**
Rico<3 : well...wat shold we do?
Me : i dono
Rico<3 : but we did putbown thaws things that we saed we arent doing no more
Rico<3 : thats probibly y brooke sead tha
Rico<3 : t
Rico<3 : cuz you didnt call nemore
Me : yeah..nto really..she never saw any of that..except the calling..and its the summer..and i wouldnt wake u up in the summer anywyas..
Rico<3 : ya
Me : ahuh
Rico<3 : well..wat shold we do....
Rico<3 : slowly llat it run off or stop it
Rico<3 : or wat?
Me : i donno..what is there to do.
Rico<3 : idk
Me : yaeh
Rico<3 : we are pritty colse thow..
Rico<3 : closer than most bf's and fg's
Me : yeah..because were not..we're just friends.
Rico<3 : ya
Me : i guess ur right..and i should just stop thinking aobut it..
Rico<3 : ya...me too
Rico<3 : but we cant just lev it
Me : yeah i know..but if we're not supossed to be close..then itll just happen..i guess.
Me : even tho i dont want to..
Rico<3 : your right
Me : wish i wasnt..but w/e
Rico<3 : yeah

doesnt life suk

Me : member..when we first imitted taht we loved each other..wehn i gave you taht copy of jesse mccartneys cd..and i was lik i like all his songs..i think theyre all really pretty..and i wish a guy would sing them to me.. and you were like who?? and you kept pushing to try to get an answer out of me..were u tryin to get me to say you?
Rico<3 : your right i waz
Me : lolz..cuz i thought u were..and thats why i never told u then that it was u..
Rico<3 : but waz it me?
Me : yeah lozl
Rico<3 : i know it
Me : lozl..we cant lie to each other.
Rico<3 : i know

funny...:D