[Aimée-Anthráx]'s diary

889874  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-12-21
Written: (6345 days ago)

I'll sneak in as you sleep
To fill your bed with kerosene
And smile while I strike the match
I love to watch you burn

889467  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-12-20
Written: (6347 days ago)

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Chops"
because that was the name of his dog
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and a gold star
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door
and read it to his aunts
That was the year Father Tracy
took all the kids to the zoo
And he let them sing on the bus
And his little sister was born
with tiny toenails and no hair
And his mother and father kissed a lot
And the girl around the corner sent him a
Valentine signed with a row of X's
and he had to ask his father what the X's meant
And his father always tucked him in bed at night
And was always there to do it.

Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Autumn"
because that was the name of the season
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
and asked him to write more clearly
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because of its new paint
And the kids told him
that Father Tracy smoked cigars
And left butts on the pews
And sometimes they would burn holes
That was the year his sister got glasses
with thick lenses and black frames
And the girl around the corner laughed
when he asked her to go see Santa Claus
And the kids told him why
his mother and father kissed a lot
And his father never tucked him in bed at night
And his father got mad
when he cried for him to do it.

Once on a paper torn from his notebook
he wrote a poem
And he called it "Innocence: A Question"
because that was the question about his girl
And that's what it was all about
And his professor gave him an A
and a strange steady look
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
because he never showed her
That was the year that Father Tracy died
And he forgot how the end
of the Apostle's Creed went
And he caught his sister
making out on the back porch
And his mother and father never kissed
or even talked
And the girl around the corner
wore too much makeup
That made him cough when he kissed her
but he kissed her anyway
because that was the thing to do
And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed
his father snoring soundly

That's why on the back of a brown paper bag
he tried another poem
And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"
Because that's what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
And he hung it on the bathroom door
because this time he didn't think
he could reach the kitchen

888336  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-12-17
Written: (6350 days ago)

It is perfectly monstrous the way people go about nowadays saying things against one, behind one's back, that are absolutely and entirely true.-Oscar Wilde

888188  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-12-17
Written: (6350 days ago)

"O GREAT SPIRIT WHOSE VOICE I HEAR IN THE WINDS.
I COME TO YOU AS ONE OF YOUR MANY CHILDREN.
I NEED YOUR STRENGTH AND YOUR WISDOM.
MAKE ME STRONG NOT TO BE SUPERIOR TO MY BROTHER,
BUT TO BE ABLE TO FIGHT MY GREATEST ENEMY:
"MYSELF"
Chief Dan George

888187  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-12-17
Written: (6350 days ago)

"When it comes time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the
fear of death, so when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more
time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song,
and die like a hero going home."
(Chief Aupumut (1725), Mohican.)
882308  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-12-03
Written: (6364 days ago)

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

848256  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-09-03
Written: (6455 days ago)

EVEN MORE EViLER THAN SKELiTORRR!!™

772785  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-04-03
Written: (6608 days ago)

Mr.perfect would say yes.. If I cried, Would you still hold me? If I jumped, Would you still catch me? If I cut, Would you still stop me? If I left, Would you still follow me? If I shot, Would you still calm me? If I killed, Would you still protect me? If I lied, Would you still believe me? If I betrayed, Would you still trust me? If I lusted, Would you still touch me? If I cried, Would you still hold me? If I died, [Would you come with me...?]


766692  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-03-22
Written: (6620 days ago)

Dear Boy...
My
Heart
Melted Today,
When I Heard you Call Her

Beautiful.


766690  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-03-22
Written: (6620 days ago)


I'll draw you a picture,
I'll draw it with a twist,
I'll draw it with a razorblade,
on my .w.r.i.s.t.
And if you draw it correctly,
a fountain will appear,
to wash away my sorrows,
to chase away my fears.


765875  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-03-20
Written: (6622 days ago)


From Here To Eternity,
I'm Asking You To Share Your Life With Me
Now And Forever I Guarantee
I'll Always Stay By Your Side
I Promise My Love To You
I'm Willing And Able And Ready To
Whatever You Need I Am Here For You
And I'll Always Be..
From Here To Eternity.

760448  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2006-03-08
Written: (6634 days ago)

So slice open my veins and let the [.RomancE.] bleed away..

758731  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-03-05
Written: (6637 days ago)


[]♪-It's not like I'm a slut
Or that I really like to fuck
I just want every boy I see
To walk away with part of me
Until there's nothing left to hold
Until there's nothing left to hate
I appreciate your help
But even you can't save me from myself..

 The logged in version 

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