Sleepy, no wanna work, moving on, no lyric poetry bastard is gonna make me do my hw. Not even the cute grad student who's teaching the class tomorrow. Bwa ha ha.

So, I've spent a total of like 4 hours in the last two days having in depth sexual fantasies. (2 hours on two different ones) Is that unhealthy? 

time to write randomly because I feel like it and can't remember the password to my journal. I guess that's what happens when I have a blog-journal too on lj. ah well what the hell

I like franz ferdinand, he's all stiff legged and weird looking, makes me wanna dance when i hear the music. 

I haven't been typing this much for a while, there are a lot of cute guys on this campus, I just wish I had some reason to talk to most of them. or I could just be still, feel myself here now and unable to do anything else because I don't feel like it. I should get food, but I don't want to spend money, I should do work, but I have tomorrow, I should do something, but I don't. fine I'll do something. 

And random time to type because it's raining outside and I don't feel like riding my bike in the rain. Must go back to the appartment sometime, but ugh, with the rain and wet and stuff. then of course I can get dry in my OWN place with no one around and watch the cable or the movies or party on like it's .... the Sunday before classes start. 

Wow, I don't actually feel like typing too much anymore, that's a bad sign, if I can't even type this long, how will I start my bsing papers and such later on? Oh dear, the bs meter is dropping, what do I do. 

Does anyone know why they have these crazy ass random nonsensical bits in spam e-mails...they make me happy! But why?? 

Ex: It says to takeone every two hours for eight or ten hours. He would see her in themorning, and if she werent all right by then he would act.
Oh, I wish I could tell you all that I am thinking.
They would know, of course, and be glad tohelp him.
Supposing somethingshould really be wrong with her and he could not get her out of it.
Anyhow, Ill have to have a little time until I can see what I cando. At any rate he hadsaid once that he would stand by her in case anything happened. Did he look enough like a young marriedman to convince any one that he was one? Then therewas a cure, and it would work, of course.
Here goes then, called Stuart, turning the car toward theFinchley home.
Im gladyou do, and smiled in a slightly supercilious though affectionateway. What little courage she had mustered up to this timebegan to waver and break.
And at once Clyde gathered, and fairly enough in this instance,that this man was reproachful.
Id like to say a lot of things to you, Sondra, if you would onlylet me, he returned eagerly. Youllprobably be all right to-morrow, wont you?
It may be,though, that some of the other stores here in town carry somethingof the sort. Youtake almost everything too seriously, dont you? Im sure I oughtnt to let you say all these things to me. Things were not so had for the moment, anyhow. There must be something though, ofcourse. And yet,under the circumstances, being truly grateful, she now smiledcordially and he the same. Im sure I oughtnt to let you say all these things to me.
He had not the courage to enter and face such a person.
Andwhat were the dangers in connection with such a proceeding?
Did they tell any one elseabout such inquiries or needs? Did they tell any one elseabout such inquiries or needs? Her voice, tense and yet low,was in itself a clear proof of her anguish and uncertainty.
It reduced to a much smallerquantity the little confidence with which he had begun his quest.
In consequence he retreated to his former reserve.
So much so that he exclaimed:Yes, but how do you know that there is anything wrong? And after that he must go over to Schenectady in themorning, sure, to see the druggist over there.
It madeher various self-conscious gestures and posings all the moreentrancing. Even his obviously dwindling affection was restimulated by herquite visible need of help.
But here he was now, all alone, forRoberta knew nothing at all. She might even expect him to marry her, so fearful was she of herparents and people. And how would shego about arranging with Clyde as to that?
At any rate he hadsaid once that he would stand by her in case anything happened. At the same time hisvoice was beginning to suggest the uncertainty that he felt.

LA MORT
La mort m'attend comme une vieille fille
Au rendez-vous de la faucille
Pour mieux cueillir le temps qui passe
La mort m'attend comme une princesse
A l'enterrement de ma jeunesse
Pour mieux pleurer le temps qui passe
La mort m'attend comme Carabosse
A l'incendie de nos noces
Pour mieux rire du temps qui passe


Mais qu'y a-t-il derrière la porte
Et qui m'attend déjà
Ange ou démon qu'importe
Au-devant de la porte il y a toi


La mort attend sous l'oreiller
Que j'oublie de me réveiller
Pour mieux glacer le temps qui passe
La mort attend que mes amis
Me viennent voir en pleine nuit
Pour mieux se dire que le temps passe
La mort m'attend dans tes mains claires
Qui devront fermer mes paupières
Pour mieux quitter le temps qui passe


Mais qu'y a-t-il derrière la porte
Et qui m'attend déjà
Ange ou démon qu'importe
Au-devant de la porte il y a toi


La mort m'attend aux dernières feuilles
De l'arbre qui fera mon cercueil
Pour mieux clouer le temps qui passe
La mort m'attend dans les lilas
Qu'un fossoyeur lancera sur moi
Pour mieux fleurir le temps qui passe
La mort m'attend dans un grand lit
Tendu aux toiles de l'oubli
Pour mieux fermer le temps qui passe.


Mais qu'y a-t-il derrière la porte
Et qui m'attend déjà
Ange ou démon qu'importe
Au-devant de la porte il y a toi


Jacques Brel

The guestbook is sad and empty, "click here to delete yourself from elftown" Thanks, I feel loved. 

though the picture is nice. 

Now I don't remember why I got on here, to stalk, or to write...ahh, the predicament.