Found this....it is amazing...
Subject: Children
For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious. For those who have children this age, this is not funny. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control. The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas: Things I've learned from my Children (honest & no kidding):
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh," it's already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six-year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
10. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old.
11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24. The mind of a 6-year old is wonderful. First grade...true story: One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs in her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...and so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?'" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" One little boy raised his hand and said, "I think he said...'Holy shit a talking pig' The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.
25. 60% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
That was funny...even though I don't have children...I have had to babysit...I can relate...*shud
Night-chan....
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA
Okay done.
My rant for the day...
I HATE PAINTING LEAVES!....Oka
Explaination : I was painting a 40 feet curtain to have leaves on it...for into the woods...
Now to go read manga....
-MIDORI
My March Break...
SLEEP!!!!!!!!!
And survive....
A random thing I found in a person's house...[Kaname Chidori] and their mood says this...
If ya feel like dying u might wanna sing
That was amazing....
Song of my moment...
Artist: Kiss Lyrics
Song: Rock & Roll All Night Lyrics
You show us everything you've got
You keep on dancin' and the room gets hot
You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy
You say you wanna go for a spin
The party's just begun, we'll let you in
You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy
You keep on shoutin', you keep on shoutin'
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
You keep on saying you'll be mine for a while
You're lookin' fancy and I like your style
You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy
You show us everything you've got
Baby, baby that's quite a lot
And you drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy
You keep on shoutin', you keep on shoutin'
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day
I wanna rock and roll
Going crazy...with Sakura and Raven...who are at my house right now...
-MIDORI
Eesshh....Sorr
The thing my friends shamelessly stole from me....
Raven: You're a freak
Me: Takes one to know one
Sakura: You're even more of a freak because you chose to hang out with us
Me: There's lots of freaks
Sakura: Yes,we all like to sit togther and converse in my head.
Explaination..
Sakura and I stayed at Raven's house on Sunday night...You can figure it out....Sugar..
I am going crazy...
If anyone dares to say...
'INTO THE WOODS'...
and...
'PAINT'...
in the same sentence...So help me, I'll punch you...
All I have been doing lately is paint the set for an 'Into the Woods' production...G
Lately...I've been going crazy and I NEED SLEEP and LOTS OF IT!!!
Song of my Moment...
Highway To Hell By AC DC
Living easy, living free
Season ticket on a one-way ride
Asking nothing, leave me be
Taking everything in my stride
Don't need reason, don't need rhyme
Ain't nothing I would rather do
Going down, party time
My friends are gonna be there too
I'm on the highway to hell
No stop signs, speed limit
Nobody's gonna slow me down
Like a wheel, gonna spin it
Nobody's gonna mess me round
Hey Satan, payed my dues
Playing in a rocking band
Hey Momma, look at me
I'm on my way to the promised land
I'm on the highway to hell
(Don't stop me)
And I'm going down, all the way down
I'm on the highway to hell
Signing off...
-MIDORI
Today was interesting...
I learned to waltz....We moved the box into an octagon then into a oval (it is supposed to be a circle but the hallway wasn't wide enough). I think I get how to waltz now...wow only two days it took to learn...
Random quotes today...
Nightshade: Do the box...
*more to come*
Song of my moment....
Scenes from an Italian Restaurant by Billy Joel
A bottle of white, a bottle of red
Perhaps a bottle of rose instead
We'll get a table near the street
In our old familiar place
You and I, face to face oooh
A bottle of red, a bottle of white
It all depends on your appetite
I'll meet you any time you want
In our Italian Restaurant.
Things are okay with me these days
Got a good job, got a good office
Got a new wife, got a new life
And the family is fine
Oh, we lost touch long ago
You lost weight, I did not know
You could ever look so nice after so much time!
Do you remember those days hanging out at the village green?
Engineer boots, leather jackets,and tight blue jeans
Oh, you'd drop a dime in the box play a song
About New Orleans
Cold beer, hot lights
My sweet romantic teenage nights
Brenda and Eddie were the popular steadies
And the king and the queen at the prom
Riding around with the car top down
And the radio on
Nobody looked any finer or was more of a hit at the Parkway Diner
We never knew we could want more than that out of life
Surely Brenda and Eddie would always know how to survive
Brenda and Eddie were still going steady in the summer of '75
When they decided the marriage would be at the end of July
Everyone said they were crazy
Brenda you know you're much too lazy
And Eddie could never afford to live that kind of life
But there we were waving Brenda and Eddie goodbye.
They got an apartment with deep pile carpet
And a couple of paintings from Sears
A big waterbed that they bought with the bread
They had saved for a couple of years
But they started to fight when the money got tight
And they just didn't count on the tears
Well they lived for a while in a very nice style
But it's always the same in the end
They got a divorce as a matter of course
And they parted the closest of friends
Then the king and the queen went back to the green
But you can never go back there again.
Brenda and Eddie had had it already
By the summer of '75
From the high to the low to the end of the show
For the rest of their lives
They couldn't go back to the greasers
The best they could do was pick up the pieces
But we always knew they would both find a way to get by
Oh, that's all I heard about Brenda and Eddie
Can't tell you more cause I told you already
And here we are waving Brenda and Eddie goodbye.
A bottle of red, and bottle of white
Whatever kind of mood you're in tonight
I'll meet you anytime you want
In our Italian Restaurant
Ya a new entry....wow that sounded a little too preppy...
Anyways, an update. I didn't die. I was drowning in a sea of portfolios. I made it through the waves, but now I hate them with a burning passion.
So onward...
For Ash, since you wanted to know my twenty things her they are.
20 things I want to do before I am 20.
1. Pierce my ears again.
2. Draw a manga.
3. Finish getting my driver's licence.
4. Complete a story that I started to write.
5. [Have my first kiss.]*Lost mine in grade three..uh huh..*
6. [Learn to swing dance.]
7. [Win a raffle.]
8. [Have my room remain clean for more than three days.]
9. Go to Anime North at least once... in costume.
10. [Have a conversation in French.]
11. Go hiking with no determined finish.
12. Play tennis on a tennis court...Street
13. Go to a ball of some sort.
14. [Take a risk in life.]*Ash you know what I am talking about* *Plus I almost drowned once soo I've done it twice.*
15. [Catch a snowflake on my tongue]*I finally did that yesterday!*
16. Sing Home Sweet Alabama in the shower.
17. Kiss in the rain....I mean come on, who doesn't...
18. Clean out under my bed.
19. [Learn to make my own clothes.]
20. To be afraid.
I learned to waltz today....now to take those steps and make them go into a circle instead of a box shape.
The song playing right now...Hmm strange, it suits the moment...scary
"Suicide Blonde" by INXS
Suicide blonde, suicide blonde
Suicide blonde, suicide blonde
Suicide blonde was the colour of her hair
Like a cheap distraction
For a new affair
She knew it would finish
Before it began
Something tells me you lost the plan
You want to make her
Suicide Blonde
Love devastation
Suicide Blonde
You want to make her
Suicide Blonde
Love devastation
Suicide Blonde
She stripped to the beat
But her clothes stay on
White light everywhere
But you can't see a thing
Such a squeeze
A mad, sad moment
Glory to you, glory to you, take me there
Got some revelation put into your hands
Save you from your misery
Like rain across the land
Don't you see
The colour of deception
Turning your world around again
You want to make her
Suicide Blonde
Love devastation
Suicide Blonde
You want to make her
Suicide Blonde
Love devastation
Suicide Blonde
[repeat till fade]
Reposting some stuff ....
["I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.]
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
[I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. ]
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
[I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.]
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I
wish they could adopt me.
[I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. ]
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
[We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. ]
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
[I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. ]
I am the domestic-viole
[I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. ]
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
[I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. ]
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
[I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me. ]
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
[I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. ]
[repost this if you believe homophobia is wrong"]
READ THIS
"difference between FAKE ASS friends and REAL friends]
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: are the reason you have no food.
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn ... we fucked up ... but that shit was fun!"
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: cry with you
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: keep your shit so long they forget its yours.
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch drink the rest of that you know we don't waste."
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out
FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would ignore this
[REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it]
'Poor Midori's gone and gotten herself sick, princess we love you, get better. And I have one last exam. And on top of that my dvd burner doesnt work! Damn it!' Raven
Umm... quetsion *cough* Since when am I a princess? I thought I was a pain in the ass...*cough*
sooooo sick...kill me now...
Today I was talking to Ash and well the conversation took a turn for the worst...or so it seems.
I was working on a project and I was yelling the table.
AND...
Now at this point I can't remember what I said...that was 10 minutes ago...
Plus Ash wouldn't tell me what I said...All she kept going on about was a bison...
Ash, my friend, go back about a 100 years and go to Western Canada, you'll find lots there. Good luck.
AND ASH, I AM NOT A JERK! Just clairifying. But you love me anyways. ^.^
NIGHTSHADE, I would like the new shojobeat. PLEASE!!!!
MIDORI
Okay, the holidays....
ACK! They were enough to drive anyone insane... or make the insane become sane.
Well ac ouple days ago, I went to Ash's house, thus being my first trip out of the house for the holiday season, and the new year.
We spent a lot of time up that night. Barely got enough sleep between the both of us.
Oh ya qoutes from that night...
"I am so telling Sarah!!!"
-Ash at 1:46 am
"So what are you going to do? Throw me up against a wall, pin my hands above my head and rape me?...What are you giving me that look for? It was saracasm!"
-At 1:56 am, said by me to Ash after she theatened to do something to me if I reveal one of her secrets...
"It's 2:10 and the British are coming but all is well!"
-Ash and I...In Memory of Sarah's grade 10 party!
Anyways, after a COUPLE of hours of sleep, we end up going to the mall. Then coming back to play "I never..."
If you don't know what that is go find out...
We ended up playing with vingear...and I won. Vingear was used for certain reasons...Plus Josh hated the stuff so it all worked out.
Anyways, happy holidays and a happy new year!
Okay...
Quotes
"I swear to drunk, I'm not God."
-Ash
NIGHTSHADE! I WANT SHOJOBEAT!
It's December...and I am not done shopping or anything so damn my friends who are...
NIGHTSHADE, I WANT SHOJOBEAT!
Most random thing that happended today was that Night-chan was wearing a shirt that wasn't black.
I hate scluptures!
And yes, I know I spelt it wrong.
And song of my moment....Kryp
I took a walk around the world to
Ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
I watched the world float to the dark
Side of the moon
I feel there is nothing I can do, yeah
I watched the world float to the
Dark side of the moon
After all I knew it had to be something
To do with you
I really don't mind what happens now and then
As long as you'll be my friend at the end
If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well, will you be
There holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side with
My superhuman might
Kryptonite
You called me strong, you called me weak
But your secrets I will keep
You took for granted all the times I
Never let you down
You stumbled in and bumped your head, if
Not for me then you would be dead
I picked you up and put you back
On solid ground
If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well will you be
There holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side with my
Superhuman might
Kryptonite
//Oh whoa whoa//
3x
Okay for my friends who bug me...
Here is my first diary entry...
BLAH!
Happy now?
*Cough Nightshade Cough*