[cvg54]'s diary

570509  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-06
Written: (7144 days ago)

<img:http://i.emode.com/tests/newcolor/images/self-aware_s.gif>

Alicia, the first color you chose reveals that you're feeling Self-aware today.

For centuries, colors have been known for their energizing, calming and empowering qualities. In schools of psychology, a leading color theory suggests that your color preferences can also indicate what's on your subconscious mind. From your choices, here's what we found out about you. Like other people who choose Green first, you probably have a good understanding of your personal strengths and challenges. The fact that you chose Green first also indicates that others probably see you as self-possessed and insightful about your own motivations and needs.

How rare is this color choice? 9% test takers also chose Green first, but less than 0.10% of test-takers share your exact 8-color sequence.

Find out what the other colors you chose say about
570501  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-06
Written: (7144 days ago)

Alicia, you're a Shark!

You've got a healthy love of life and a killer instinct. Chances are you hate rules, and don't plan on getting old. You're flexible and friendly on top of being innovative and smart. In short, people respect you.

You're extroverted and love being in the spotlight. Your mantra is "work hard, play hard" — you live life to the limit.

And that's just scratching the surface!

570488  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-05-06
Written: (7144 days ago)

Alicia, your heart's desire is Public Service and Education

You have a number of attributes that make you an excellent candidate for a public service or education-related career. Your life is all about helping others and making a difference, so if your current job does not allow you to make a contribution as part of a team, you're likely to be very unhappy. Your especially empathetic and good at listening to others, so others trust you to lead since they know you're dedicated to doing what's best for the whole.

If you're currently not in a public service field and are unhappy with your current situation, it's likely that you're not living your life's purpose. Until you get yourself back on track, the life you dream of may never arrive.

What exactly does this 'dream job' look like? The answer lies in the combination of visions that you have for each of your 5-second lives. If you can find a way to creatively combine the various attributes of each of your dream lifetimes into one career in this lifetime, you'll be well on your way to fulfilling your heart's desire.

568858  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-05-04
Written: (7146 days ago)

Paranoid: High
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Moderate 
Borderline: Very High
Histrionic: Low
Narcissistic: Low
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: High
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate 



*Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a distrust of others and a constant suspicion that people around you have sinister motives. People with this disorder tend to have excessive trust in their own knowledge and abilities and usually avoid close relationships. They search for hidden meanings in everything and read hostile intentions into the actions of others. They are quick to challenge the loyalties of friends and loved ones and often appear cold and distant. They usually shift blame to other people and tend to carry long grudges.

*People with schizoid personality disorder avoid relationships and do not show much emotion. Unlike avoidants, schizoids genuinely prefer to be alone and do not secretly wish for popularity. They tend to seek jobs that require little social contact. Their social skills are often weak and they do not show a need for attention or acceptance. They are perceived by others as humorless and distant and often are termed "loners."

*Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow.

*A common misconception is that antisocial personality disorder refers to people who have poor social skills. The opposite is often the case. Instead, antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of conscience. People with this disorder are prone to criminal behavior, believing that their victims are weak and deserving of being taken advantage of. Antisocials tend to lie and steal. Often, they are careless with money and take action without thinking about consequences. They are often agressive and are much more concerned with their own needs than the needs of others.

*Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing injury to their own body. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. Borderlines think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met.

*People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. Histrionics also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

*Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by self-centeredness. Like histrionic disorder, people with this disorder seek attention and praise. They exaggerate their achievements, expecting others to recongize them as being superior. They tend to be choosy about picking friends, since they believe that not just anyone is worthy of being their friend. Narcissists tend to make good first impressions, yet have difficulty maintaining long-lasting relationships. They are generally uninterested in the feelings of others and may take advantage of them.

*Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. Avoidants are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidants yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.

*Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. Dependents often remain in abusive relationships. Over-sensitivity to disapproval is common. Dependents often feel helpless and depressed.

*Obsessive-Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion.
563786  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-04-28
Written: (7152 days ago)

WHAT COMES TO YOUR MIND WHEN YOU HEAR...
Lotion: scenty
Rubber: tire
CD: music
Bed: sleep
Paper: ball
Run: tired
Candle: red
Mouse pad: soft
Sweatshirt: dirty
Door: shut
Pictures:memories
Flowers: beautiful
Deodorant: secret
Pencil: write
Sex: Eddy
Radio: commercials

563779  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-04-28
Written: (7152 days ago)

I am freaked out of my mind... I am scared to death and I don't know what to do... my mind seems like a blur and everything else in it seems so weird, like a tornado that is lost. I hate myself.

562028  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-04-26
Written: (7154 days ago)

<img:http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/p/uc/20050426/sga050426.gif>
562027  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-04-26
Written: (7154 days ago)

Aries & Scorpio


When Aries and Scorpio come together in a love match, it can be the kind of relationship where they both wonder how they ever managed apart. Both Signs love power and they can achieve just about anything -- as long as they learn to share the spotlight. Scorpio is very focused; once they set their sights on Aries, Aries is most likely powerless to resist! Scorpio has a deeper and more complex devotion to this relationship than does Aries.

These two Signs tend to engage in heavy, heated arguments. Their connection is highly passionate and often argumentative, because both partners have jealous tendencies. Scorpio tends to be more patient, but is also more possessive than Aries -- and can lash out (with that Scorpion sting!) when their feelings get hurt. Despite their differences in emotional involvement, both partners love risk and taking chances; this is not a boring relationship! Aries and Scorpio can have lots of adventures together. They may have trouble understanding one another -- Aries is a true extrovert, totally up-front and open, while Scorpio is more inward, emotional and, at times, manipulative. Sometimes a truce is necessary to keep things running smoothly!

Aries and Scorpio are both ruled by the Planet Mars (Passion), and Scorpio is also ruled by Pluto (Power). When two people with Mars's energy come together, it's like two soldiers on a battlefield -- they're either allies or deadly enemies. Mars also represents passion, so Aries and Scorpio tend to have an exciting time together (both in the bedroom and out of it!). Arguments are normal in such a challenge-oriented couple -- and making up is definitely something to look forward to! Pluto adds extra intensity to this dynamic.

Aries is a Fire Sign and Scorpio is a Water Sign. These two elements can be a great combination if they work together, combining emotion and physical action to get things done. Scorpio is a strategist, and can help Aries slow down and learn how to plan battles before jumping into them. Aries teaches Scorpio to let go and move on when their efforts are thwarted. However, Water can also put out a Fire, and Scorpio's tendency toward emotional manipulation has that effect on Aries -- it's too much Water dampening Aries's enthusiasm. Conversely, too much Fire makes Water evaporate away; when under emotional stress, Scorpio can become vindictive. It's essential for Aries and Scorpio to work together, not against one another.

Aries is a Cardinal Sign and Scorpio is a Fixed Sign. Aries can teach Scorpio about spontaneity -- doing things just for the experience, rather than always having an agenda in mind. Scorpio can help teach Aries to stabilize and finish things rather than always jumping into new projects without completing what's already on the table. When they can understand that they're both loyal and devoted to one another, they can both be the boss -- Aries as the initiator and Scorpio as the emotional leader.

What's the best aspect of the Aries-Scorpio relationship? The power of their combined forces. They're both winners and they won't give up, making theirs a relationship that never settles for second best.
561172  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-04-25
Written: (7155 days ago)

What a wonderful weekend... from one simple action, to a bucket full of worriness and guilt... whatever God wants. That's all I have to say.

561169  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-04-25
Written: (7155 days ago)

http://hush.imess.net/
DOWNLOAD MANGAS!

561160  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-04-25
Written: (7155 days ago)

<img:http://www.hillcity-comics.com/graphic_novels/new_graphic_novel3555.jpg><img:http://store.viz.com/images/p/K1L/pdGNK1L0001.jpg><img:http://www.rightstuf.com/images/large_images/viz1591167019.jpg>

<img:http://mangadreamland.altervista.org/novita/kare.jpg>

Damn Stacy!~! She made me fall in love with this manga!!!
552126  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-15
Written: (7165 days ago)

What GALS really mean when they type in....*

- Blue -- I'm feeling' HORNY

- Pink -- SEXY!

- Red -- I LOVE YOU!

- Green -- Feelin' a little CRAZY!

- Orange -- I'm HAPPY

- Yellow -- SAD!

- Purple -- Feelin' Girly

- Aqua -- Moody


***What she REALLY means when she says...


- I don't like you. (But she still flirts with you) -- I LOVE YOU!

- Call ya tomorrow. -- I AM NEVER CALLING YOU AGAIN!

- Like the shirt. -- It would look better on my boyfriend.

- Don't leave me. -- I WANT YOU!

- I like your new hair-cut. -- YOU ARE TOTALLY HOTT!

- I like your pants. -- I'd rather be in them with you.

***What she means when she touches you...

- On the Leg -- I want you bad!

- On the face -- I want to make-out!

- The Arm -- Hold My Hand!

- The Neck -- I want a kiss!

541632  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-04-04
Written: (7176 days ago)

Wow.... Monday is here... whee! Let's see.... I am quite happy with the fact that I'm here and that Eddy is too. <Luv him> I am so happy... and I keep reading his most recent letter...

<On the outside>
To:My Vieja
From:Your Viejo

<Inside>
4/4/05
Hi baby,
Um... I really don't know what's gonna happen on your Birthday. You said that you wanna tell your parents... are we? Cause to tell you the truth, I'm scared. I have nothing to hide, really, but I really want them to accept me and I don't want them to say that if you got late to your house or you do something wrong I don't want them to say that I'm the influence upon that. Your friends, too. I don't think they will like me, don't know why but meh. If you want to tell them, tell me how we are gonna tell them ok, baby? I missed you so much, it was boring and I felt lonely and I hate my hair. I hope your weekend was much better and the pictures were nice. I really feel like I haven't been there for you and if it is that way, I'm so sorry. I wish things could be better. I just think that as time goes on when we aren't together our love will fade and one day there will be someone else and I don't want that. I don't want to lose the best thing in the world. I'm sorry; I'm just being stupid. We'll talk about your parents, well, if you want to, ok? Well, baby, I'm in my 1st period right now so I have to go.
                   From your Eddy.
I love you.

538608  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-01
Written: (7179 days ago)

What can I say? There is nothing left inside of me, other than him. I love him to death, yet no one sees this. I don't know if this love is unrealistic, nor impossible. All I know is that I am willing to give him all that I can and I'm willing to change so much for him. I am willing to face everyone and oppose everyone just for him. I don't know why. But this love, this whole thing is so different from everything else. It's like one of those natural phenomenas that you can't quite grasp nor understand. All I know is that I am finally happy with someone and that is Eddy Frank Montoya, the man of my hopes and dreams. I can't love another, not the way I love him. That's quite impossible and unrealisitc, just like so many other things are. And I don't care on what the world says, because I love him. I love you Eddy and that's something that no one can change, not even me. I can't change it, I won't change it, not for anything or anyone in this world. Te amo.

538601  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-01
Written: (7179 days ago)

I miss him like crazy... maybe not as bad as before, but still... it's like a longing to be with someone so deep and strong that you can't help but feel hopelessly lost...

538599  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-01
Written: (7179 days ago)

<img:http://gradcenter.marlboro.edu/~jmcconn/images/end.gif>

538583  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-01
Written: (7179 days ago)

<img:http://a692.g.akamai.net/7/692/13/V001/sp.ask.com/i/home/sdj/sdj_aprilfools_2005_rev3.gif>
Www.ask.com

<img:http://picsap4.commercialless.com/irm/tiansi.gif>

Jeeves is a nice guy.

Tinky, too.

535412  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-03-29
Written: (7182 days ago)

It's 10:54 And I Have No Idea On What Time We're Supposed To Get Outta Here. It's A Banked Day... Whoopee... But I Am Feeling Down, Instead OF Being Happy. I See Him So Happy Without Me... Eddy Came To School Today, Which Is Weird, But Nice. But I Saw Him With Friends. Boy, Was He Happy. And He Wasn't Even Going To Come! He Was Gonna Go To H/P With His Nice Little Buddies To Buy Guitar Crap. I Don't Know If I Should Be Mad Or Happy. My Life Sucks.

535398  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-03-29
Written: (7182 days ago)

The Ten Commandments For Teens
1.Thou shall not sneak out while parents are asleep. (Why wait?)
2.Thou shall not steal from Kmart.(Everyone knows Walmart has bigger selections.)
3.Thou shall not get arrested for profanity.(We all know destruction has a bigger affect.)
4.Thou shall not do drugs. (Alcohol lasts longer.)
5. Thou shall not steal money from Mom. (Grandma has more.)
6.Thou shall not get into fights.(Why not start them?)
7.Thou shall not think about having sex.(Like Nike says, "Just do it!")
8.Thou shall not strip in class.(Hooters pays more.)
9.Thou shall not use the finger for profanity.(Two fingers look better.)
10.Thou shall not skip class.(Just take the whole day off.)

534456  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-03-28
Written: (7183 days ago)

Wow.... month numero dos... Me and Eddy have been together for two months now. And he's not here to celebrate it with me! (stupid termites! damn bastards!) :( This day has been going so slow and dull... I don't know what to make of it. I mean, it's like everything's so wrong... and I miss Eddy so much... I'm going crazy here! I never knew that this was how it felt to love and miss someone... I am so foreign to this feeling, it's so new. ::sighs:: Me so lonely...

525514  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-03-17
Written: (7193 days ago)

Hey baby, I am so sorry about the phone call thing please forgive me it's 3:19 am and I can't sleep so I'm gonna write about how much I love you why?..... well, maybe cause you ask me, so I'm going to try my best to tell you Okay? Okay Alice, there are times when I think I'm not worth your time because you are like a flower and I'm just a thorn, your life and your values are more important than my own life because no one can make me as happy as you do sometimes I can't show it, but I am grateful to be with you my lady, no one else can calm me down or set me free only you, only you can make the remaining days of my life valuable cause in the end I will know that I had the greatest soul next to me and that no one else can grasp. It doesn't matter if I get in problems with others as long as I'm good with you because I'm yours, your slave, your everything.
    Whatever happens I will always love you even if one day your love that you gave to me starts to drift away, if you fall for another I will know that it is for a reason my fault who will know but all I want from him is to treat you the way I would love to do. Give everything that you wish anything from Love, to the majestic sun. I'm not saying I don't want to, but maybe there will be one thing you really want and it will kill me to see that I can't give that item to you. I'm willing to let you go, I'm willing to sail to the sea, I'm willing to catch the sun and to hold the moon, I'm willing to drown in my own mist, I'm willing to walk the remains of the earth, I'm willing to fall in complete darkness where the shadows crawl, I'm willing to suffer the greatest pains because I love you and no one can change that.
    Though sometimes I seem to be afraid of everyone taking you away from me the times I felt that maybe it was to good to be true you came for me and made me feel wanted, needed, made me feel like an important piece of existence, told me things that I thought no one would tell me and that's why I hope that no one can make you feel the way I make you feel because then I know that it would be all over. Maybe the only thing I can give you is my heart but I'm really going to try and give you the best that I can give and I'm sorry if I fail in anything or if I make you blue and I know I sometimes seem selfish but having someone like you my love I would love to keep you in a place where only I can go just you and me I know I'm not as fun as others like your friends and if you get tired of me when we get married I would understand I know I'm not exciting or out going all I can say I'm sorry if I'm not Price Charming, I Love You Alicia Mejia. Now and Forever, I promise because Forever DOES exist.
     From your Eddy .

 The logged in version 

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