Ok :D The other day i went to go take a shower .. but i forgot to bring my boxers :P so .. i dint put boxers on and just put my pants on :P or other known as "free ballin it" and i liked it alot so i'm never going to wear boxers ever again ^.^
:D
Why is it i always get these feelings of loneliness ? ?? ???
And I've been waiting for so long, to hold you in my arms .
I'm glad that half of the people that I talked to today decided they wanted to be a bitch to me :D
...
..
.
-.-
:'( *there goes my butthead* )':
Without a sound . WITHOUT A SOUND . And I wish you away
Have you ever seen god ? :(
[f.u.c]
I feel like i'm seconds away from dying :( like my heart is going to sieze up on me :( my chest hurts really bad . like i'm going to have a heart attack soon :( idk whats going on but i know that i dont like it :( i hope i feel better :( its times like these that just make me wish something would happen right now :( it hurts soooooooo much .........mm fuck !
I feel better . I'm sorry if i scared anyone . I was just sad . I'm really sorry
I'm ready to die
I'm really getting saddened about this relationship thing . I dont think i'm ever going to find someone i'm going to fall in love with . every time i think i found that someone ... something bad happens . i get cheated on alot, cuz i'd like to know that i'm going to be with that someone in my life for a while before i have sex with them . so . . . instead of waiting for me ... they cheat on me . EVERY FUCKING TIME :"( I dont know what i'm going to do . I say i'm just going to work on my music, but sometimes it gets to me . really... i have no friends around here any more :( either i dumped them or they dumped me . so i have noone to hang out with... and if i did hang out with someone... i'd just be going around doing bad things ... i dont like going out alone and doing things... but i dont like going out with people that are going to get me into trouble or people that could potentially get me in trouble . I got lucky that Emily came along in my life ... but obviously she wasnt the one ... and i completely regret having sex with her . .. that was a big mistake :( i just feel like everything is crashing down on me =\ the only thing good thats happened to me is the band thing ... but the people that are in the band are all into bad things too ... i cant fucking win . .. i hate my life :'( i dont know what to do . i think theres no point to it . . i hate my dad, he makes me feel like nothing... tho we can get along sometimes .. i know he doesnt like me . i dont ever talk to anyone else in my family . . . noone ever calls me . . . :( i hate this ): everything's fucking pointless . i really really need a hug right now :'(
[f.u.c]
I need a hug :(
I still Love you Rebecca .
All I have to say is I miss my babe :"( I dunno what's going on but I don't like it :(~ I Love you [*Corona*]
There are a few new things to talk about :)P I feel fuckin funny talking in this thing . No response . I think, more than likely i'm going to have to move out . Not kewl :)P But I'm learning a song that's making me feel better . It's NoDoubt's 'Don't Speak' . I only like the intro and the solo though . The chorus really sux . That's about it .
[*Corona*] and [f.u.c] foerever and for always ^,^
Now for the good part of my diary that I completely forgot about. The drummer from 'The Vibe' {band I may play lead guitar for} wants to start another band. I'm sooo going to name this band 'MoodwinG'. This could be fucking GREAT ! ! ! And I think thats all that there is to tell you. Last night, I didnt get to talk to my babe cuz I had a band practice out at Garcias. I think we're going to start practicing alot more now. I'm not sure. Well to start I missed talking to my babe soooooo much last night. I really want to hear her voice now. but I've got to go to work at 4 and she's not done with her tennis thingy until 4 :(~ and it's friday and she prolly working tonight too :(~ Anyways. First good practice session for a long time was last night. With Garcia and I. We came up with a few new things. And found out that his ??? kereohkey ??? {and we're supposed to sound shit out ? ? ?} machine records live sound :)~ Rock on.
[*Corona*] and [f.u.c] forever and for always.
*he looks into his babes eyes and says softly "I'll always Love you Rebecca" moments before giving her a mind-blowing kisson the lips*
This sux. My babe and I really haven't been talking lately :(~ It's like we both have busy schedules ... .. . and by the time we do get to talk we're both tired. And... I think theres something wrong with her :(~ Like... I feel like she's drifting away from me. I know that she's busy. She has her life and I respect that. My babe can do what she wants. But ... when I talk to her on the fone ... I really don't feel the Love coming from her. Maybe it makes sense that I'm not. But all I know is it's making me as sad as can be.
[I Love you Babe.]
[f.u.c]