Okay peoples; [jaderii] has finally gotten her contests together for voting. Being the good muffin I am, I'm notifying y'all.

Ja-Chan's Otaku Color Contest
Ja-Chan's Otaku Lineart Contest
Ja-Chan's Otaku Graphics Contest

[jaderii] and I encourage votes!

We All Fall Down

It’s not like you to turn away
It’s not like you to cry your heart out
But everything has the chance to change
So don’t worry when your world crashes
Since nothing’s worth the carnage
Of this blacked out day

We all fall down, we all fall down
And when we finally hit the ground
We have the chance to cry or dance
Just long enough before
We have to pick ourselves up again
Then we walk on together or alone

When your knees are scraped
And your face’s a mess
And all those lies they said are true
You don’t have to be strong
And you don’t have to hold on
Just let go and wait for the best fall
I think you’re brain’s been raped

We all fall down, we all fall down
And when we finally hit the ground
We have a chance to die or lie
For hours and hours more
Then we should get off the floor
And see if we can make it on our own

I don’t need you
Or your lies on lies on lies
You’re so untrue
And I love your disguise
But this is not worth anything
And you’re already dead
So let’s leave each other
I’m down in lieu

We all fall down, we all fall down
I don’t feel for you anymore
As cold as my apathy makes me
I can still survive
Fall down, you’re worth it
Fall down, it’s worth it
Fall down, break down

Cry for the first time in years
Die for the first time in years
Beg, whine and feel alone
On the top bunk of a one-bedroom home

You can be anyone
You are like everyone
You can be anyone
You want to be
When you get back onto your feet

We all fall down
You can fall down too
Even when that means
Turning into something new
You can fall down too
I won’t watch

But you’ll understand
When you’re left alone
In the darkness
Of the prettiest
Flower on the moon
Will you still smile
When you’re filled with gloom

There’s room for you in Heaven
And there’s room for you in Hell
Let’s see where you go
When you’re down for the count

We all fall down
And sometimes we cry
And sometimes we wish
That no one would ever die
We all fall down
And sometimes we pray
And sometimes we scream
That nothing’s okay
We all fall down
And sometimes we’re gone
And sometimes we get up
And have to move on

We all fall down
We all fall down
We all fall down
We all fall down
And sometimes that’s okay.

--Shion

poem. Between Hughes and my previous slump, it's rather actually perky, but relieving.

He-yo! I haven't journaled in like, ever, so I figured I'd write about some stuff happening to me. For no real reason.
Lately I've been overloaded by schoolwork!! TT.TT Har har. Yeah, but I still get time to look at manga and buy stuff! Like... "Petshop of Horrors", "Tokyo Babylon", "Gravitation" and "Samurai Deeper Kyo" to name a few. I've been drawing a lot of weird stuff lately, but I haven't messed up too much... it's pretty cool. I write too much... ANYWAYS... I can't write anymore here because I am super busy. Ha ha.

For anyone who comes here just passing through... Sorry there's not much here beyond poems.

Gray Scale Pain


I don’t hate people
I can’t hate at all
Somewhere under all this junk is a strict guideline
I think I made it up when I was eight
No way am I ever gonna hate
Nevertheless, I hurt
I hurt physically
Emotionally
In every way
All I do is hurt
All day, everyday
So this is what they meant by pain
Pain is all I have now
I hope it goes away soon
It’s killing me
Rule one: Breathe
Rule two: Don’t hate
Rule three: No disrespect
I don’t like these rules, but I try to follow
Why I made them up, I don’t know
But I have to do what I say
Or else I’ll wallow in pity
Die in a second under the pressure
Who said I had no reason to live
Well, that was me
I know, it’s bad
But I have to stay sad
If some one else is to see my smile
If I truly was happy
No one else would be
So I fake it all out
My mask is so pretty
Smiles and laughs
Like a straight line that goes on forever
I hope to kill this flower
I never liked roses
They gave me more pain
But I don’t like myself
So we must be the same
I never knew how much I was
Of all this gray scale pain

Cold as Laughter

Lasting like dying
Hoping like flying
Warm as death
Silence in all
Close as death fall
Warm as death
Lasting like dying
Hoping like flying
Warm as death
Fate's ring
Heaven's wing
Warm as death
Warm as death
everything
Cold as laughter
nothing stays
oldest ways
Warm as death
sore as hell
Heaven's will
child's games
warm as death
perfection's name
Lucy Jane
warm as death
Cold as laughter
there's nothing like
coffee and manga
warm as death
Cold as laughter


Restrictions

Stop this nonsense
Remember no lies
no apologies and no goodbyes
Kick start the day
Some old-fashioned way
Remember your lines
You're not aloud to cry
Say you're lies, say you're sorries
Say you're good-byes
Get on with your life
Leave room for suprises
And forget about the prizes
No apologizing
Remember the rules
You're not aloud to cry
No good-byes
Remember your mind
You can't think aloud
Absolutely no lies
Remember there's no script
So open your big mouth
and say what you want to say


Spit and Rinse Me

Forgotten in the river of rhyme
feed me to the sands of time
eat my soul and cleanse my mind
try my luck and feed it to you
Let this plan all fall through
Meet with the enemy at night
Try to remember you came to fight
Walk through the dark with your false light
Look down on me
Then beat me out of sight
Forgotten in the river of rhyme
feed me to the sands of time
eat my soul and cleanse my mind
try my luck and feed it to you
Spit me rinse me
Let me fall
Spit and rinse me
Through it all


Nothing

Sleep my life away
Death is here to stay
Pretend it's all okay
Live for yesterday
Make the best of nothing
Tell you hate your latest fling
Buy a life because they're free
Fall in love and then kill me
Just you wait and you will see
My death brings me closer
Not to hell, but to you


These are all from my DJ* and are written on various days. Some are older.
(*- Daily Journal, for homeschool.)

To Be Happy

All you need to do
To be happy
Is to smile everyday
And pretend that nothing's wrong
Then all of it will fade
And you can just pretend life is normal
But for those in reality
Remember it won't get too bad
And once it gets to it's worst
That it can only get better
So hold on to yourself
And remember there is nothing
Not worth living for
To not be happy about.


Be Home

That was all he said
That was all he did
That was all he wanted
That was all he needed
That was all he had
That was all he heard
That was all he was
That was all he got
That was all he said,
Then he left me here.
And all I knew,
was that he would very soon,
be home.


Ode to You

Never give up
Never let go
Never pretend
Never hear what I say
When I say I hate you
Never listen to them
When they say you're bad
Never forget that whoever you like
Boy or girl girl or boy
That that is who you like
No matter who you are
If you're gay if you're straight
If you're bi if you're lies
That's who you are.
Be true to yourself
And to everyone else,
Follow these rules,
this is my ode to you.


Manipultation

Follow your dreams.
What about nightmares?
Believe in yourself.
What about my friends?
Never give up.
On what? When?
Never let go.
Am I hanging on?
Hello desperate world,
and welcome home.
This place is a lie
and you're standing alone.
But remember that all I say,
is twisted truth,
and know that what I know,
is pure manipulation.