[Raziel Ahnara]'s diary

681276  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-10-13
Written: (6980 days ago)
Next in thread: 681281, 681320

To anyone who cares: I'm not feeling the greatest today, and don't care to deal with anyone. So, forgive me, but I probably won't want to talk to you.
I love you, but I need some time to myself. I'll most likely not be coming on for a couple days (but knowing myself, a couple hours). I'll be fine, so please don't worry. I'm just being complicated, annoying, and a nuisance, I'm sure.
Hugs and kisses to all of you.

     [Deidre]     

674783  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-10-01
Written: (6992 days ago)

I find it strange that normal people want to be famous...

...but famous people want to be normal.
665718  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-09-15
Written: (7009 days ago)
Next in thread: 669167




Supposedly, I'm worth [ $1,194,044 ].
...
[ Damn. ] I was hoping it was more.




665241  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-09-14
Written: (7010 days ago)

I shall now go rent a wrecking ball to completely tear my house and diary to shreds! HAHAHAH! Why, you ask? Because, simply put... I. Am. A. Moron. Who doesn't deserve the wonderful man she has. So, getting rid of the emo-esque quotes and putting what once was back up again. ^__^


And a special section goes to the love of my life.




Jake, love, thank you so much. You have no idea how much you've helped me. And, you're right, had we not stayed up and talked this out, I certainly would not be in decent shape today... I'm afraid to think what I might have done. So please, forgive any indecent thoughts, forgive how I sounded, forgive any wrong I did you... Because I never meant it. I'm sorry. I love you so much, and I'd like to think I'm not stupid enough to act the way I did, but I guess I thought wrong.  Thank you for staying with me. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for everything.

I love you.




*Sigh* Today'll be a good day. ^^ Though I wish I got more sleep, at least we're not running in P.E. today.

Bah. Besides. Sleep is overrated. :P ^^;
665240  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-09-14
Written: (7010 days ago)

Stupid Girl

Year of the Spider
[ Cold ]


Wanna love ya
Wanna bug ya
Wanna squeeze ya
Stupid girl

Wanna touch ya,
Wanna take ya,
Wanna shut ya,
Stupid girl.

I can’t take this,
Born to break this.

She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
Stupid girl, stupid girl

I’m a loner,
I’m a loser,
I’m a winner,
In my mind.

I’m a bad one,
I’m a good one,
I’m a sick one,
With a smile.

I can’t take this,
Born to break this.

She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
Stupid girl, stupid girl

(acoustic break)
Stupid girl, stupid girl

(whoa)

She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
She’s going away,
(she’s going away)
What’s wrong with my life today?
Stupid girl, stupid girl
662599  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-09-10
Written: (7014 days ago)

To The End

Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge
[ My Chemical Romance ]

He calls the mansion not a house, but a tomb.
He's always choking from the stench and the fume.
The wedding party all collapsed in the room,
So send my resignation to the bride and the groom.

Let's go down
This elevator only goes up to ten.
He's not around, he's always looking at men.
Down by the pool he doesn't have many friends
As they are. Face down and bloated, snap a shot with the lens.

Would you marry me?
Would you bury me?
Would you carry me to the end?

So say goodbye (to the vows you take),
And say goodbye (to the life you make),
And say goodbye to the hearts you break and all the cyanide you drank.

Woah, woah, woah, woah.

She keeps a picture of the body she lends.
Got nasty blisters from the money she spends.
She's got a life of her own, and it shows by the Benz;
She drives at 90 by the Barbies and Kens.

If you ever say "never" to late,
I'll forget all the diamonds you ate.
Lost in a coma and covered in cake.
Increase the medication, show the vows at the wake.

'Cos if you marry me,
Would you bury me?
Would you carry me too the end?

Say goodbye (to the vows you take),
Say goodbye (to the life you make),
Say goodbye to the hearts you break and all the cyanide you drank.
Say goodbye (to the last parade),
Say goodbye (the choice you made),
Say goodbye to the hearts you break and all the cyanide you drank.

Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, woah.

Say goodbye (to the vows you take),
Say goodbye (to the life you make),
Say goodbye to the hearts you break and all the cyanide you drank.
Say goodbye (to the last parade),
Say goodbye (for the choice you made),
Say goodbye to the hearts you break and all the cyanide you drank.

To the last parade, and the parties fade, and the choice you made...

To the end.
661384  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-09-07
Written: (7016 days ago)
Next in thread: 661473

Blah. It's been more than a week. S'pose it's time to write again.

Found out last Friday you got laid off. Saturdays aren't busy enough to really need you. All's well, though. All you did was dust and stand around, really. W00t.

Now, back to today. Woke up at eight this morning to get up and do [ nothing ]. You started laundry, watched Ocean's Eleven, and waited. Finally, you got dressed, wandered off to priso- er... "school", and waited around for 2 and a half hours trying to get in line to get a picture taken that you know you'll hate anyway, turn in money that means you'll get to see that soon-to-be-hated picture, and get a schedule that'll pretty much ruin you because of all the damned classes you have.

Sigh.

And because you feel like torturing (not to mention boring) all those who actually care to read this, you'll go ahead and list your classes:




Semester One - Term One
   Period 1: Chemistry
   Period 2: SAT Prep
   Period 3: Newswriting/Talisman
   Period 4: Aerobics & Fitness

Semester One - Term Two
   Period 1: Chemistry
   Period 2: Photoshop
   Period 3: Newswriting/Talisman

Semester Two - Term One
   Period 1: US History
   Period 2: Advanced Algebra
   Period 3: Newswriting/Talisman
   Period 4: English 11

Semester Two - Term Two
   Period 1: US History
   Period 2: Advanced Algebra
   Period 3: Newswriting/Talisman
   Period 4: English 11




Yay for you, right? *Sigh* You're going to be turned into an unwilling homework junkie... W00t. Your mother would be proud.


Oh, yeah. All this starts this Friday. Woo-fucking-hoo.
655019  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-08-28
Written: (7027 days ago)
Next in thread: 655597

Lame little quiz thing:

1. 1
2. 2
3. Jake
4. Jacqueline
5. Rachel
6. Jamie (mom)
7. Gerald
8. Closer
9. Creep
10. The Farm
11. Do You Know?



3. - The one that you love. True.
7. - The one you like, but can't work out. True... I guess... o.O
4. - The one you care most about. *Sigh* Yeah... Gots ta' look out for teh sister. ^^;
5. - The one who knows you very well. Hehe, true. ^^
6. - Your lucky star. Yeh.. momma' loveses me. ^^;

The song, "Closer" (NIN) is matched with Jake.
The song, "Creep" (Radiohead {I think.. o.O}) is matched with Gerald.
The song, "The Farm" (Aerosmith) tells you the most about your mind.
The song, "Do You Know?" (Killradio) shows how you feel about life.



I guess they're kinda' true. o.O ^^;

643197  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-11
Written: (7044 days ago)

I've got a disease and, well, I think that I'm sick,
Well, leave me be while my whole world's comin' down on me,
You taste like honey,
Honey, tell me can I be your honey bee?
Be strong, keep telling myself that it won't take long until
I'm free of my disease...

643073  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-11
Written: (7044 days ago)

Do You Know (Knife in Your Back)

[ Kill Radio ]

Do you know what they say,
Do you know what they say, what they say about you?
Do you know what they do,
Do you know what they do when you leave the room?
Do you know what they say,
Do you know what they say, what they say about you?
Do you know what they do,
Do you know what they do when you leave the room?

Never thought twice about holding your tongue,
Once upon a time you were so young.
Everywhere you carried around your soul.
In the night they stole it, left you skin and bones (knife in your back),
Laughing aloud at your expense, fed themselves on innocence (knife in your back).
Their attacks inserted doubt, now you’re stranded in the cold with a knife in your back...
(Knife in your back)

Do you know what they feel,
Do you know what they feel, what they feel for you?
Do you know how they play,
Do you know how they play, how they play inside you?
Do you know what they steal,
Do you know what they steal, what they steal from you?
Do you know how they prey,
Do you know how they prey, how they prey upon you?

Never thought twice about holding your tongue,
Once upon a time you were so young.
Everywhere you carried around your soul,
In the night they stole it, left you skin and bones (knife in your back).
Laughing aloud at your expense, fed themselves on innocence (knife in your back),
Their attacks inserted doubt, now you’re stranded in the cold with a knife in your back...
Uhh!

Tell me did you grow after all these years
Giving up control and buying into fear?
Nights slip into mornings and days remain unchanged,
But their mighty appetites will not be tamed.

Do you care? Do you care?
Do you care what they say,
Do you care what they say, what they say about you?
Do you care how they prey,
Do you care how they prey, how they prey upon you?
Upon you...
640539  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-08-07
Written: (7048 days ago)

First day of work. Not too bad.

Got into work 15 minutes early. Sue (my supervisor) showed me around again. Two floors, the main floor, and then the office supply display. I spent about fifteen minutes dusting up there. Whee. For the next two hours and forty-five minutes, I colored with new markers that just came in. Used some stencil templates, messed around with the markers some more, and then ate lunch. After lunch, colored some more, cleaned off some picture frames, and then did a prep demo presentation of the markers, then left. Not too difficult a day, but six hours in that place made me tired. Weird, huh?


So... that's it. Now I'm home... Whee. *Yawn* I need a nap... and food.

638769  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-04
Written: (7051 days ago)

001: Name: Deidre Christine Jones
002: Nicknames: Deids, Deidwa, Deedee, Ducky, Deeder (ugh… Damn you Amanda…), D.
003: Country: U.S.A.
004: Birthdate: August 29th, 1989
005: Height: 5’6”… Oh… you mean without my heels… Fine… 5’3”
006: Eyes: Blue/Grey/Gold (Pretty, huh? ^__^)
007: Haircolor: Brown and blonde…ish. Leave it to the “all-natural” girl to go and get streaks. :P
008: School/work: I’ll be working at a family owned business called Willamette Stationers. I haven’t had my first day yet, so I dunno what my position will be. ^^;
009: You smoke: Nuh uh. Tried it once, never will again. >.< Blech.
010: Hobbies: Reading, writing, drawing, listening to music, talking on the phone, talking online, talking in general (hey, I’m a teenage girl, what do you expect? :P), music in general, Aerosmith (a.k.a. my GOD *bows* :P ^^), etc.
011: Brothers/Sisters: One little pain in my- er... sister... Age: Pre-Drama Queen (a.k.a. 10)
012: Relationship: In a happy relationship with none other than my beloved Jake (for roughly a year and a half ^^).
013: Piercings: Nope… My ears used to be pierced, but the holes closed. *Sniff*
014: Tattoos: Nope… But I want one! Or… two… hundred… :P Kidding. But at least one of them will be my ode to Aerosmith. ^_^
015: Country to go to: Either Germany or Egypt. ^^ I know, such extremes. o.O :P ^^
016: People you won't talk to: Immature people who insult me or believe they are worth my time.
017: Nicest person you've met: Gah! I couldn’t POSSIBLY name them all! ^__^
018: Person you wish you hadn't met: Bryan… *Sigh*
019: Person(s) you'd like to meet in person: Steven Tyler, Joe Perry, Joey Kramer, Tom Hamilton, Brad Whitford, Nancy, Gerald and Rachel (Double date! :P), Kurt (Yay for slushies! ^^), Claire (W00t for vanity ;D), Rob Thomas, Carlos Santana (Everyone must worship him and his guitar-playing ^_^), and Daffy Duck (Hehe, can’t forget cartoons :P).
020: Person you admire most: Hmm… That’s a toughie… Probably my mom. ^^ She puts up with so much when she doesn’t have to (you know, like me and my sister :P), but she does it because she’s awesome like that. :P ^__^ *Hugses my mommy* :P Yeah, sometimes even as a 16-year-old, I call her mommy. :P
021: Sexiest person alive: Duh! Jakey! *Snuggles*
022: Favorite pajamas: My tanky-top and my plaid boxers. ^^
023: Favorite car: El Camino! ^________^ W00000000000t! ^___^
024: Favorite movie: Hmm.. Right now, it’s probably Willy Wonky and the Chocolate Factory (with Gene Wilder). ^^
025: Favorite CD: Currently, Nine Lives, Aerosmith (of course :P)
026: Favorite city: I dunno. Possibly San Francisco… o.O
027: Favorite plush: Erm.. I dun really have any plushies, but my favorite stuffed animal is my Mohair Bear that Jakey got me… And my signed Stitch. ^__^
028: Favorite cologne: Erm… I dun even wear perfume all that much, what makes you think I have a favorite cologne? o.O
029: Favorite magazine: I dun really read ‘em. o.O
030: Favorite sound: Jake’s voice (especially when he says, “I love you”. ^_^)
031: Favorite TV show: Uhm… I dunno. o.O “Whose Line is it Anyway?” I guess…
032: Favorite writer: I don’t really know. o.O I used to, but… yeah… I dunno. o.O Sad, huh? :P
033: Favorite nickname: Deids (I dun necessarily have a favorite, but that’s the one that gets used most often, so… yeah. o.O)
034: What you're listening to now: Matchbox 20, Mad Season ^^
035: What is under your bed: Erm… carpet? o.O
036: Favorite color: Blue and purple. ^^
037: Favorite song ever: Oh, I couldn’t pick one. ^^;
038: Favorite song at this moment: ”The Farm”, Nine Lives, Aerosmith… I got terminal uniqueness… ^_^
039: Favorite food: I couldn’t choose that one, either. I love most Mexican food, though. ^_~
040: Favorite class in school: I’m not currently in school, but my favorite classes are usually Newswriting and Spanish (w00t for other languages ^_^)
041: Favorite drink: [ CHERRY COKE ] *Drools*
042: Lucky number: Either 5 or 3. ^^
043: Greatest thing about you: My understanding and my tolerance. My worst would be my vanity, I suppose. ~_~
044: Deodorant you use: Secret
045: Favorite shoes: My airwalk open-toe heeled sandals. ^__^ I lubs them. ^^
046: Bedtime on weekdays: I dunno… It used to be 1:00 AM, but lately… o.O
047: Phrase you use most: ”Ehh… *blows raspberry*”. ^^;
048: Most romantic moment: That’s for me to know and for everyone else to… er… not find out… o.O
049: Most embarrassing moment: I’m sure I’ll come up with another one sometime. Right now, they all seem kinda’ matched up, so… heh.
050: Spend time inside or outside: Hah! Outside, that’s funny… I’m a hermit to the end. :P
051: What you do on weekends: I spend the weekend either with the phone attached to my ear (via headset) or with my eyes glued to the monitor… much like now.
052: Class you hated most: Science Foundations! >.< Blargh…
053: Your breakfast: Oftentimes, nothing, sometimes cereal.
054: Pets: Two kitties ~ Raven (mom’s) and Tiny (my baby! ^^), and two rats ~ Holly (mine ^^) and Mrs. Frisby (Jacie’s).
055: Food you really hate: Raw tomatoes or mushrooms.
056: Pet peeves: People who are ignorant and closed minded, and bad grammar and/or spelling. >.<
057: Serious or funny: Depends on the situation, but I generally like a less serious atmosphere.
058: Fast or slow: Again, depends on the situation.
059: Prefer being single or involved: I love to be loved. ^^
060: Simple or complicated: Different aspects of me are simple, and different aspects are complicated.
061: Cremated or buried: Buried, so I can still hold some sort of a physical connection to those on earth.
062: Boxers or briefs: Well… Generally, girls wear panties… o.O
063: Up late or in bed early: Oh, up late, definitely. ^^
064: Light or dark: There are days where I need to bask in the light, and days where the dark is much more comforting.
065: Tall or short boyfriend: Tall (and it looks like I got my wish… My 5’3” to his 5’11”… And you say I’m not short, babe… >.<)
066: Walk in the park or a movie: Depends how I feel that day. ^^
067: Sexy or cute: Either works, because Jakey can pull off either. :P ^_^
068: Hug or kiss: Well, I’m affectionate, so either is wonderful. ^_~
069: Happy or sad: Have you ever heard someone say, “I wish I was sadder,”? I mean, really…
070: Life or death: I respect death, but I like living, so I’ll stick with life. :P
071: Gig or disco: I suppose a gig… o.O
072: Left or right: I'm right-handed, but I wish I was ambidextrous. Better coordination. :P
073: Sausages on top or on the side: On top of what? o.O Generally on the side (unless I make a little breakfast sandwich thingy with toast and sausage and eggs and shtuffs ^^)
074: Shoe size: 11, unless it’s wide, then it’s 10. >.< Blargh… me and my clown feet… >.<
075: What you would ask God: Well, I don’t have a particular question for Him right now… o.O
076: Believe in reincarnation: It’s a nice idea to entertain.
077: Believe in aliens: I believe there may be life on other planets, but that life may just be a few bugs that got stuck in the spacecraft…
078: Your last words will be: ”I love you,” to my significant other.
079: Does true love exist: I don’t really know, I suppose… If you can tell, I don’t usually think too deeply. :P
080: Number of kids you want to have: I’m thinking two right now. Boy and girl.
081: The one thing you can't stand: People interfering with other’s relationships.
082: Best feeling: Complete love.
083: Worst feeling: Guilt.
084: What you're afraid of: Losing the people I love, being alone, and porcelain dolls… Ech…
085: Emotional person: Oh, incredibly. When it’s that time, watch out! Magnified 50 times! >.<
086: Cry during a movie: Er… no. I dun think so. o.O
087: Goal in life: Make others happy (and still manage to make myself happy in the process).
088: Promise you made to yourself New Year's Eve: I dun do resolutions (I always end up breaking them… >.<)
089: Favorite artist: I dun really have one. o.O
090: Animal you would come back as: Either a cat or a snake. ^^
091: Most beautiful part of the body: The eyes. Be it the right person, it could be the perfect sanctuary.
092: Place you'd ask your love to marry you: Personally, I’d want him to ask… ^^;
093: What you think of Elftown: I’m actually thankful for it (and Elfwood ^^;)… If I hadn’t found it, I’d never have found my beloved…
094: Something you miss in Elftown: People who were actually interested in fantasy… Not just cybering. >.<
095: Favorite pick-up line: The best one I’ve heard (well, okay, read) so far is, “I lost my teddy bear, can I cuddle with you instead?” ‘Course, I like it so much because the only person I imagine would say it to me is Jake, so… ^^;
096: Thing you do most on your PC: Stroll mindlessly around Elftown (where hopefully someone’s up for Rping or I have messages), chat on MSN, and listen to music. ^^
097: Weapons you keep in your pocket: Erm… I have a silver pocket knife, but I don’t carry it around with me. Actually, I rarely even touch it anymore. o.O
098: Ethnicity: Erm… Human? :P
099: Age you'd like to be when you die: I’d like to live as long as I could.
100: Closing remarks: "Byyyyyye! I love you!”

638665  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-04
Written: (7051 days ago)



  Lois: Oh, my God, where's Stewie?!
  Peter: He's around...
  Stewie: Ungh! Let me out of this stink-filled, corduroy prison!
  Lois: Peter, that's sick!
  Peter: It's okay, he's outside the underwear.

[ Later... ]


Peter: *Opens pants* Hey, Stewie, you can come out now.
Stewie: Oh, turn off the light! I'm reading a ghost story.




Everyone should [ worship ] "Family Guy".


638604  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-08-04
Written: (7051 days ago)

You've recently become obsessed with the italicizing and bolding of all your words, and the underlining and redness of the [ SPECIAL ] words.

La da dee dee da... You've lost your mind...


[ Enough of this insanity. ]
 
 The logged in version 

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