FUCK Í HATE EVERYTHÍNG RÍGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!
How can life possibly be so FUCKÍNG messed up??? Mai "friend" who i have known 'since i was a foetus' as she likes to point out has had a lot of shite going on lately and everything shes gone through ive been there for her...so what does she do? THROW ÍT ALL BACK ÍN MAÍ FUCKÍNG FACE!!! thanks to her i nearly got suspended from school and am on the verge of failing maths because ive been skipping lessons to help her...i know i coulda stayed in lesson nad stuff, and as she pointed out it was mai choice and i wanted to, but i wanted to becuase i was worried about her...how fucking dare she??? Shes been ignoring me at school alot lately and just is being über friendly with everyone else...this is shit. Everything was bad enough already without her laying all her shite on me. She claims she doesnt want mai help anymore, shell be sorry when she fucking well loses me when she needs me most. I know shes fucked in the head, but arent we all...and its no reason to completely ignore the one person whos been there for her...im not saying im lil miss immodest or a perfect pal or anything, but everyone knows ive been there for her when shes needed help. This is a crock of fucked up shit and im SÍCK OF ÍT!!! And the thing is, she's so messed up you have to tread carefully with her, which is just a whole lot more frustrating, becuase when she doenst see something clearly, you cant explode at her, so i had to block her...then I just snapped...thank god for Daniel (both of em...) and Muse...bless their little cotton socks. If it werent for them, i may have fucked up bad. I actually have a feeling that malicious, vindictive, sour, bitter, jealous, sad lil excuse for human being, ermis, has sometihng to do with it...i can imagine he wouold poison her...he tried to with madz...fucking loser...why cant he just fuck off outta mai life and let us live without his stupid little headgames??? I so nearly fucked him up at school...but I dont wanna get suspended just for that wormy lil arsehole...even if its worth it just to see him in pain...and lots of it...
Sorry, but it really needed to get that out.

mrapp.

boppedibopbopbop...hm...
well, ookeez...DID YOU KNOWWWWW? that...the combination for the briefcase in pulp fiction was 666666 (the sign of the devil x2) and this led to revelations that it was actually Marsellus's soul in the case...it may have worked, if it weren't for the fact that not even QT knew what was inside...dumbasses...psssh.
for those of you who have never seen or heard of Pulp FIction, you probably have no idea what I'm talking about. Meh, deal. :P
I felt like writing that as there's fuck-all to do right now...
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/subliminal.php
go to this its fucked up, but not as much as...
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/queen.php
...I hate this...scary soundsys

*sighs* life is in a hole again...thankyou to all mai pals jsut to start...without you guys, I'd be stuffed...
I found out tonite that MPW (wrestling thingy...) has closed down, so I'll no longer be able to see Nick Savage...please understand this may all seem trivial, but that also provoked old feelings of someone...I actually really miss him. 6 months sonce speak. I thought I could get over him, but it sure don't seem that way...it just seems that everytime I want to get close to someone, they leave or have to go away or we just can't see each other anymore...And I've come to the conclusion that I loved that guy...I think I still do, but I dunno...And the thing that sucks the most is that I was such a cow to him...i put up mai guard so as to not get hurt again...our last conversation was really fun and great, but he said, 'theres still a week before I go, so we WiLL catch up..' later that week, hr lost his job (where I used to see him), so we never did see each other again. I never got mai proper goodbai...this all sounds really sappy and corny, but I really have to let it out.
And i also doenst help that mai pal is now diagnosed as a manic depressive and shes having alot of trouble at the moment, so yeah...anyways, i still have mai friends so its all good...i hope...
sorry if something in here doesnt make sense, im really tired...

OK!!!
Life just got so much better!!! And quicker than I'd thought, too!!!^^ [VeraAda] just rang, so that was good, to talk to someone (not on MSN) cuz I missed her..we hadn't talked for a while...AND!!! Nick's all better!!!! I'm so happy for him!!! Fuck my probs, they're all so trivial in comparison now!!! WAHAHAHA!!! I'm just so happy hes happy!!! :)
goodnight, ppl...and not-so-cruel (anymore..) world!

*sighs*
so life hasnt really improved since my last entry...becky's ok, now..but since one horrid little dream I had last nite, my feelings for a certain someone (names i cannot disclose...) have slowly crept back. And i hate it. I won't go into great detail..i don't want to have anybody who shouldnt find out do so, but I think that if I do anything about it, there's a chance i lose two of mai dearest pals..but, if i dont do anything, then i have all these feelings stew inside of me until god knows when...
also, another pal is having some probs...I wont say..its not my place to, but it just seems we're crawling behind in the life race, while everybody else is going for gold...or silver at the least...ok, so thats a really corny, terrible anagram, but how else do i describe? Anyway, one good thing happened...[Madzeri] and I were in Norwood today and saw one of our favourite wrestlers...quite a humourous experience...hm. so there you go...

FUK!!! why can't life just be good for once???
tonite I found out that mai pal overdosed on alcohol nad nurofen and yeah...shes had a hard time lately, but i alds ofound out another frind of mai mums has cancer which sucks. it seems that everyone good in this world is having shit kicked in their faces. last year mai grandma died of cancer so there you go. Hopefully next year wont be so gay. I HATE LIFE RITE NOW!!!!
ps..soz if this is a lil bit illegible, im a tad pissed rite now... it helps...I MISS NICK!!!!! *sobs* why wont he come back on???? *NIC KIF UR OUT THERE!!!! COME BAK!!!*

Heeeeeyyyy!!!!
Wow, this whole diary thing is completely new to me, so I have NO IDEA what I'm doing! Sorry if it sucks...
anyways, not much has happened today....life is boring...my mum's peeling garlic and my uncle's over-that's about it...
Argh! School was sooooooooooo tedious....maths went forever! None of my pals were there...slack bloody KELLY went home early.
I'm gonna ring Vera <VeraAda> tonite...she's my paaaaaalllll.....hehehe...well, I'm going to get boreder now (or however you spell it... je ne sais pas....) Wait! I'll listen to Muse and the gods of the universe, THE WHITLAMS!!!!!!!! A local band from Sydney for those of you who don't know what the hell I'm on about...
well, keep smiling!! :D