[Dark Mousy the Kaitou]'s diary
[alkabong8888]
stupid instructions
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...somethin
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
1. I used to eat natural foods, until I realized most people die of natural causes.
2. The easiest way to find something around the house, is to buy a replacement.
3. Never take life seriously, Nobody gets out alive anyway.
4. There are two kinds of pedestrians: The quick, and the dead.
5. Life is sexually transmitted.
6. An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
7. Health is merely the slowest rate at which anyone can die.
8. The only difference between a rut and a grave, is the depth.
9. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, sitting in the hospital dying of nothing.
10. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
11. How is it a match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Written about Friday 2005-06-10
Written: (7106 days ago)
28 Ways to make a girl smile...
1. Tell her you think she’s beautiful, not hot or fine or sexy.
2. Hold her hand at any moment, even if it’s just for a second
3. Kiss her every time you get a chance
4. Whisper sweet things in her ear
5. Always tell her you love her, at any and all times.
6. When she’s upset, hold her tight and tell her how much she means to you.
7. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most
8. Call her baby or sweetie or something cute like that
9. Sing to her, no matter how horrible your voice is
10. Pick her over your guy friends, and especially girl friends
11. Write her notes, she LOVES them
12. Introduce her to family and friends as your GIRLFRIEND
13. Play with her hair
14. be playful with her. Wrestle. Tickle her.
15. Sit in the park and talk to her
16. Tell her funny jokes, tell her stupid jokes, just tell her jokes
17. Call her just to say you missed her
18. Let her fall asleep in your arms
19. Carve your names into a tree
20. If she's mad at you, kiss her
21. Make her feel like a princess
22. Buy her little things … like candy … bears
23. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you're alone
24. Let her take as many pictures of you as she wants
25. Look her into the eyes
26. Slow dance with her, even if there isn't any music playing
27. Kiss her in the rain
28. If you're in love with her, tell her
--------------
THIS IS SOOOOOOO SWEET & SOOOO TRUE N ALL!
Think about this... You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.
1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would
die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they
want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if
they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. If not for you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique.
9. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes
from it.
11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a
look: you most likely turned your back on the world.
12. When you think you have no chance of getting what you
want, you probably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself,
probably,
sooner or later, you will get it.
13. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget
about the rude remarks.
14. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will
feel much better when they know.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that
they are great.
taken from [xx..I dream in darkness..xx]
Oh yeah, the very first serious Capcom RPG is currently in my PS2! Megaman X Command mission. I bought the strategy guide because I have a bad history with RPGs...but man this was no Squaresoft...e
I also picked up Bloodrayne...-
Kari's Best of Jokes:
http://www.fan
[‘Just say no to them, and maybe they’ll leave me alone...’ Seto thought as he just stood in the middle of the room.
“Hey, have you seen episode 41?” a boy asked.
“No.”
“Episode 56?”
“No”
“Episode 425?”
“No”
“What’s your name?”
“No.”
“Why’d your mother name you that?”
“No.”
“Do you hate me?”
“No.”
“Are you a guy?”
“No.” The whole room fell silent. Everyone stared at Seto.
“No?”
“Shut up” the boy walked away and went over to another crowd of Star Trek lovers. ‘I need a new word to say to them’ Seto thought to himself.]
“Yo! My people!” everyone in the lunch room turned to Kita who was standing on the lunch table that the YGO gang were currently sitting at.
“Today I’m gonna teach you Japanese losers how to have an American break dance!” at that, Kita started doing flips and twisting on her back on the lunch table. Some people stared, and others clapped. Mokuba turned to Seto.
“Does she always do this?”
“Only on Tuesdays.” Now the whole lunch room was clapping and yelling out Kita’s name. Kita had her arms out and was nodding her head.
“Thank you! And for my next trick” Kita grabbed some of the mystery surprise food and dumped it down Tea’s shirt. Tea jumped up, screamed, and ran away. A devilish smile came on to Kita’s face.
“Good thing I put that silly goo trail right into the bathroom so she’ll fall face first into the bathroom water.” A big splash was heard coming from the girl’s bathroom. Now everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, clapped.
“Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here on Wedenesday!” Kita yelled out taking a bow.
Juno: Damnit! I want my photocopies! Photocopy damnit!
Photocopier: out of paper in tray two.
Juno: No wyou're just making stuff up! There's tons of paper in there!
Photocopier: uhh..paper jam?
Juno:*royally pissed*
Office Dude1: So the gorilla says to the priest: That's not MY bycicle.
OD2: haha! Hiliarious!
Juno:*destroys the photocopier* Haha! *sweatdrops* I dun wanna spread office rumors...but uhh...I think somone vaporized the photocopier...
*walks oway*
OD2: I'm not firing her. You fire her.
let's see. The dance...
First it was hard to get dancing I was just kinda moving, that is until they dimmed the lights! Then it seriously got going. First it was just us girls grinding. Then I saw my friend Katie and got four guys from ehr school to dance with me. After that I just danced with Hikari.
Then, I got bored, so....I started going through the DJ's CDs, picked up LP's Reanimation and was like "Number 14 please!" which is, of course. Runaway. Not long after a guy walks up and starts grinding with me. So I danced to that one. They even played MC Hammer's "Can't Touch this" Which I sang along to while I got down and dirty.^^(Christina Agulera eat your 'r' out)
Then came the slow down AKA the last thrity minutes. So I started going crazy with the dancing, a lot of thrusting of my hips and stuff. Eventually I had a bunch of guys just dancing or grinding with me. One time I was grinding and the entire dance hall turned around and started watching and cheering. The girls were having fun getting their B/fs to dance with me and taking our pics.^^
Looks like I sorta took over as a lot of people were watching me, either jeering or cheering. Either way I didn't care I was just there to 'get low'.
Written about Saturday 2005-04-16
Written: (7161 days ago)
W00t! I went to this dance tonight and it was awesome. First no one would dance they were all nervous and stuff so I started dancing(okay so it wasn't exactly appropriate dancing, but hey) andyways I get my BFF and her brother to start dancing with me. Soon most of the girls from my school were basically grinding together in a big group. Suddenly everyone else starts dancing. Then the guys join in. Later a bunch of girls from another school started dancing around me saying "Go Kitty! Go Kitty!" because of my hat. Then the third time they did this I started to get some of the guys fromt ehir school(the shy ones of course) to dance with me. I even got my BFFs brother to slow dance with me. I wasn't going to let anyone get away without dancing to at least one song.
My fav was 1985. I had an even bigger group around me. 0.o people really liked dancing around or with me for some reason. By the end of the night most people were calling me Kitty.
Lol! During the last song five girls were together(me included) and we all started grinding( we're in eigth grade what do you expect Xp?) anyways there was this one part where me and another girl got down low and started thrusting our hips forward while the other three danced above us, I swear even the chaperones where drooling. hehe! It's true about catholic schoolgirls, we only look so sweet and innocent.
Whoah... I never expected this to happen. It's going to be interesting to explain this, but since none of you know me I don't have to be choosy with my words. On eof our small class of 18 students was expelled today. His name was Scotty.
He was expelled for 'innapropriate behavior'. In other words he opened his pants and encouraged the girls to touch him. Yeah, even me. So anyways one of the seventh grade girls final complained to the principal. All the eigth grade girls got called to teh office to tell the story.
Well I didn't want to be the one to expell Scotty so I was pretty elusive. I told the truth, just not the whole truth. So anyways someone finally fessed up(I know who too grr...) and we're all in trouble for not exposing the sexual harrasment before. Scotty has, of course, been expelled.
So why am I saluting him? Because exect for this one thing Scotty was an awesome guy and I good friend. I really will miss him, and I wish him the best of luck.
screw conformity...
Written about Monday 2005-04-04
Written: (7172 days ago)
That's right, Ladies and gentlemen, Craig Ratterree has jsut won his first international competition. LOVE HIM DAMNIT!
Cheers.^^
DMK
BTW Craig's the taller one.
OMFG IT LOOKS LIKE CRAIG MAY HAVE JUST SECURED FIRST PLACE!!!!^^
*Starts reading Gilgamesh and blushes*
Are you people sure High School Freshmen should be reading this? 0.o
It's just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
Just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
(hit it!)
(1! 2! 3! 4!)
Verse:
Jesse James was an outlaw man
He was always breakin the law
Six guns firin from both his hands
Fastest you ever saw
Did he do it for the money
Was it for the fame
Finally somebody asked him Jesse,
Why you wanna rob them trains? (and Jesse said...)
Chorus:
It's just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
Just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
I'm the meanest hombre you ever saw
Cause lately I ain't gettin' no lovin' at all!
It's just what I d
It's just what I do
Well Orville wright set his sights
High up in the air
Him and Wilbur worked day and night
He didn't seem to care
Well the town folk said if you were meant to fly,
God would've given you wings,
What makes you want to spend all your time
Building that flying machine? (and Orville said...)
It's just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
Just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
I'm the first real flyboy you ever saw
Cause lately I ain't gettin' no lovin' at all
It's just what I do
It's just what I do
Well Picasso painted them pictures
There was beauty in every stroke
When asked about his motivation
He said I think it's 'bout time you should know
It's just what I do when I can't get no loving
Just what I do when I can't get no lovin
I'm the workingest painter you ever saw
Cause lately I ain't gettin' no lovin' at all
It's just what I do
It's just what I do
It's just what I do
It's just what I do when I can't get no lovin'
A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your
refrigerator and helps himself.
A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend has shoulders soggy
from your tears.
A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend has
their phone numbers in his address book.
A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party. A real friend comes
early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.
A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed. A real
friend asks you why you took so long to call.
A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems. A real friend
seeks to help you with your problems.
A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could
blackmail you with it.
A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument. A
real friend calls you after you had a fight.
A simple friend expects you to always be there for them. A real friend
expects to always be there for you!
Written about Saturday 2005-03-26
Written: (7182 days ago)
GOOD LUCK CRAIG-KUN!! NO PARTY FOR J00 IF J00 DON'T MEDAL! KICK BUTT FOR ME AND EMILY-CHAN!!
ANYWAYS...jes it has happened again! I need emotional support, Hotohori just died!! *cries* I loved Hotohori too, and Nuriko as well! I need a hug and a pretty picture of Hotohori to stare at. T.T
EEEEEEEEEEEEE!
NOOOO!! update...again
http://www.tos
oh yeah! Everyone must clickie! You may need to download windows media player to view it though!^^
Written about Saturday 2005-03-12
Written: (7196 days ago)
Mood: Alive, but not well
Music in CD player: Slipknot
Staus: RPGing...and pondering
Watching: Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind
Playing: Street Fighter Anni ed
1. Kiss on the hand.... I adore you
2. Kiss on the cheek... I just want to be friends
3. Kiss on the neck... I want you
4. Kiss on the lips... I love you
5. Kiss on the ears... I am just playing
6. Kiss anywhere else... lets not get carried away
7. Look in your eyes... kiss me
8. Playing with your hair... I can't live without you
9. Hand on your waist... I love you to much to let you go
yeah, just though I'd post that. I need some love, but I have problems. I've taken to becoming cold and silent when I have nothing to say, don't like you, or don't know you. Alana's giving me no leeway, and this time I think the friendship is seriously over...not that I care. I got depressed last time, not this time. I have other things to get depressed over.
*sigh*
I need a life...and a hug...or two...or twenty...
Someone help me. Nich and Kari are at it again. They won't stop yelling and attacking each other, and everyone wants me to do something about it. WHY ME! I'm not all perfect and all powerful. I've been trying all day to bring those two back together...I want them back together. But Nich has taken to insulting Kari behind her back to me, and Kari has taken to yelling at me, this is in addition tot ehm trying to kill each other. I want to go back to the old days, when Kari and I were inseperable and BFFs...now I just dunno what to do.
Someone help me...but dun yell, and say I'm a horrible friend(you know who you are) I'm trying, I really am. But I ahve to deal with this, and with my mom, who has struck again. She won't stop yelling at me about my damned book report. MY LIFE ISN'T SO PERFECT AS IT SEEMS PEOPLE! STOP ACTING LIKE I'M ALL POWERFUL, ALL KNOWING, AND HAVE THE ABILITY TO FIX EVERYTHING.
*crawls into her corner and cries*