[New Years Revolution]'s diary

549313  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-04-12
Written: (7142 days ago)

She walked down the empty road
She knew she had nowhere to go
People could only stare
At the girl who wandered everywhere
With no heart
She was ripped apart
She never knew love
She got torn away
Everyday
Only looking to God above
Her shadow was her only friend
It was the only thing that would stand by her till the end
The rain falling down
Only hoping she would drown
It's always lonely walking alone
She's been beating to the bone
No one to love, no family at all
They all left as she began to fall
She didn't belong anywhere
Scared away
No one cared
She was unwanted
She was hated
She was her own person
But no one likes a loner
They took away everything from her
She walks in the dark
Hoping to find someone with a heart
Someone who won't hurt her again
All she needed was a friend
Then one day
As she walked down the street
The last thing she heard was a beep
Hit by a car
Everyone stared
Surprised that no one cared
As she lay there in the street
She was gone
They only hoped her heart would move on
Now everyone remembers
The girl who got no second chances
As she walked down that empty road
With no one and nowhere to go
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Depressing peom, ain't it? I wanted to write a narratove peom, and this came out>.< Sucks, I know. Don't steal.
Kari

549288  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-04-12
Written: (7142 days ago)

I couldn't tell you
Who I was today
Cause everytime you left me
My person just walked away
It was like a spell
It was like a curse
I didn't know what life was really worth
You kept my spirit up
There was no such thing as giving up
Cause everytime you looked at me
I'd want to be the very girl you saw in me
Nothing can change me now
Now that your gone somehow
I'd follow to the edge of the world
If it meant I was your special girl
Please don't say never
I wanna be yours forever
Please just take away my pain
Let me win the game
Wipe away my tears
And whisper in my ears
Take my breath away
Forget about it
Let's just get away
Sweep me off my feet
Tell me that I'm sweet
Just so I can be the girl
You want me to be
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A peom dedicated to my bestest friend Camille.
Kari

542778  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-04-05
Written: (7149 days ago)
Next in thread: 542798

You've got nothing to say
You never seem to turn my way
I guess things will never be the same
I lost the game
You won
I see you standing there
I see you laughing everywhere
I can't seem to get you out of my head
I can't seem to stop hearing what you said
Maybe I was wrong
Maybe I was being fooled all along
It was just apart of your plan
You wanted to be the man
But your not
You seem to have forgot
That no man would turn away
That every man would fight and stay
Why does this keep happpening?
Why are you still in my head?
Every time I lay in my bed
Little dreams from far away
Creep inside to stay
I don't want to like you
I don't want to love you anymore
It ended
The day you walked out that door
Don't
Don't tell me what is there
I can already see it's unfair
I can't take it
I can't break it
I won't take it
You stuck a needle in my heart
You broke it all apart
Pieces shattered on the floor
I can see the darkness in the core
Why must I kneel down alone?
You've already broken all my bones
Just go away!
I don't want to see you every day
Like I do in my mind
I seem to see you all the time
I can't take away the pain
Cause your the one to blame
Just go away....
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
This is a peom/song. Yeah, about damn Nicholas. I know I used 'away' alot>.< Still depressed, don't steal, this is copywrited.
Kari

539234  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-04-02
Written: (7152 days ago)
Next in thread: 539344, 539357

Dear Diary,
        Just some humorous RPGs to celebrate the fact that I didn't see Ryan and/or Josh all day yesterday. This is some funny stuff that has happened in my past with my best buddy Camille([xx____Guns Go Bang], and my big sis Kura[Mokuba Chichiri]:
Ryan: (my step bro) *playing a R rated game*
Game: *makes a beeping noise* You got melasted.
Ryan: Damnit!>:0
Kari: -._-.U
~
Camille: *puts on Sum 41 cd* These guys are totally awesome! *sees Parents magazine* Uw...
Camille/Kari: *sit down on the couch and start reading it*
*heavy metal punk music playing in backround*
Camille: Hey look, this kid drank posion.
Kari: Interesting...
~
Kari: *Laying on bed next to Kura, talking in the middle of the night* And Patrick can be Isono...
Kura: Is Patrick even awak?
Kari: Patrick, are you awake?
Patrick: Yes...
Kura/Kari: 0.oU (it's an inside joke, don't try and get it)
~
Camille: *on www.douhaveagrudge.com, playing the horror game with boredom*
Kari: *clutching onto Camille's arm, firghtened by the game and it's fast movements*
Person Camille is playing as in game: *starts running, then falls*
Camille: Aw poo, she found us.
Kari: *screams in terror and runs away*
~
Seto: *steps out of car* Eat lead! *shoots bullies*
Kari: Hey! I said NO guns! Just beat them up!
Kura: Darn, I was hoiping you wouldn't notice.
Kari: Wouldn't notice? *points to 3 dead bullies* How could I NOT notice?
Kura: Maybe if we-
Kari: Just re-satrt the scene!
~
Camille/Kari: *being told to be careful of gang members*
*afterwards*
Kari's mom: Now you girls have fun.
Kari/Camille: We will! *runs across street to other sidewalk*
Random talking thing on sidewalk: Olla Senior.
Camille: *twists around quickly* GANG MEMBER!!!!
Kari: 0.0
~
Merik: Now you will play my game of death! *hands Kura a panel with a red button on it* Now you will ether saty in this room till you starve to death, or press this red button. But if you do, you will die anyway! MUWAHAHAHA!
Kura: Uwwwww! Pretty button!
Mokuba: You don't think-
Seto: Mokuba, shut your eyes, I don't want you to watch yourself die.
Mokuba: 0.oU
Kari: *presses button*
Mokuba/Seto: NO!
*doors open*
Kura/Kari: Yay!^o^
Seto/Mokuba: 0.o?
Merik: Damn *steps into room, knives shoot at him* Double damn *dies*
~
Mokuba: Ohana means family, which means no one gets left behind.
Seto: *stares at him* You gotta stop watching TV.
Mokuba: I know.
~
Kura: Jesus is such a cool guy, I wanna hug him^-^
Kari: 0.oU
Kura: What? I do! Wouldn't you?
Kari: Yeah, but your talking as if Jesus was a dog-._-.U
Kura: ^-^U
~
Mokuba: Kari!
Kura: Kari!
Seto: Kari!
Mokuba: Stop copying me>.<
Kari: Dying over here-._-.U
Kura: Oh yeah^-^U
~
Kari's mom: Alright, now I'll tell you a special story to get you to sleep.
Kari: Oh no...-.-
Kura: Uw! I love these things^-^
Kari: 0.0
~
Kari: And Mokuba is SO cute, he's so adorable, he's so... he's a PUPPY!
Camille: 0.0, Kari, Mokuba is not a puppy-.-
Kari: Well, he's as cute as one!
Camille: T.T

Well, that's all for now. Hope you liked. Tell me what you think in my guestbook^-^
Kari

538319  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-04-01
Written: (7153 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        Today is April 1st... oh shit, it is?! That means... *gulp* Josh... April fools day for me is the most feared day ever. It's seriously worse than Friday the 13th. Wondering why you are thinking... well, brothers tend to take this day very sewriously, and for the people who don't take it seriously (which would be me) are in BIG trouble. But anyway, I have bandaids on all 10 of my fingers and it's hard to do much of anything with them on. It's basically because I think I have a nervous problem... it's ether that, or just a bad habit. I think it's a nervous problem though. It's cause whenever I'm doing something, and I'm, listening, or watching something that is tense or dramatic, I start picking at my skin and tearing it and it starts to bleed. Which is bad because if I keep doing it I'll get some infection or something. So the bandaids are suppose to keep me from picking myh fingers basically. But anyway... our school is having a talent show (whioch I think I already told you) and I was gonna be singing a song, right? Well, I think I have decided to sing "She Will Be Loved" by Maroon 5(for me, choosing a song is very hard, I have to be good at it (which means no incredibly high pitch points), it has to mean something important, and I have to really feel for the song)
Well, think that's all. See ya.
Kari

537209  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-03-30
Written: (7154 days ago)
Next in thread: 538044

Dear Diary,
        Another meaning full song since I don't really know what to say. This song reminds me of Kura and Camille:
"She Will Be Loved" by Maroon 5

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

[in the background]
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

Yeah
[softly]
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Try so hard to say goodbye

535586  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-03-29
Written: (7156 days ago)
Next in thread: 535882

Dear Diary,
        *sigh* Today Kura had to leave. We went and saw all the monuments that Washington ha to offer just before she had to leave. I just wish I didn't fall asleep last night. I was so tired, we were trying to stay up all night to make it seem like we were together longer than it really was. I guess all I can say is, that I felt like a real little sister (and a real Mokuba^-^) My mom is in love with Kura, I bet she wishes that she could adopt her. I wouldn't blame her. Kura thinks evereyone is too attached to her (since everyone seem to fall in love with Kura's charm) but other than that, I think she liked staying here in Virginia with me. She said it felt like it was the one place where she belonged. She could belong anywhere, just as long as we're together. It was a pretty sad sight to leave her, I felt like a piece of my heart was being ripped out again, or at least just fadding away. But I knew that day would come, and it did, but I think it went pretty well as it did. Believe me, the whole family misses her already. But 3 months will go by as fast as they did the last. It was actually pretty special, because when I was leaving in the car, listening to the radio, the song that popped up right when I turned it on was this:

"If I Ain't Got You" by Alicia Keys
Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things

Define what's within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you

Some people search for a fountain
The promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love them

Hand me a world on a silver platter
And what good would it be?
With no one to share, with no one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, you, you

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you

If I ain't got you with me baby
Nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby....

I miss you Kura, we'll see each other sooner than you know it.
Kari

530438  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-03-23
Written: (7162 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        Jus another song....
"Isn't She Lovely?" by Stevie Wonder
Isn't she lovely
Isn't she wonderfull
Isn't she precious
Less than one minute old
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she
But isn't she lovely made from love

Isn't she pretty
Truly the angel's best
Boy, I'm so happy
We have been heaven blessed
I can't believe what God has done
through us he's given life to one
But isn't she lovely made from love

Isn't she lovely
Life and love are the same
Life is Aisha
The meaning of her name
Londie, it could have not been done
Without you who conceived the one
That's so very lovely made from love

Today is the day I first met Kura ever, we have offically known each other for a year. This song is all about ya sis^_~ (although I should've used this song on her b-day^.^)
Love ya!
Kari

530436  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-03-21
Written: (7162 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        I've been listening to "The Thriller" by Micheal Jackson. Yeah, Micheal Jackson, before he was a friken child milester-.-. I take a liking to old music like that, my mom listens to it all the time, and it's usually good. And no, it's not bad to like Micheal Jackson's music that he made before he went crazy and became white, so don't message me about it. Anywayz, here:

"Beat it" by Micheal Jackson
They Told Him Don't You Ever Come Around Here
Don't Wanna See Your Face, You Better Disappear
The Fire's In Their Eyes And Their Words Are Really Clear
So Beat It, Just Beat It

You Better Run, You Better Do What You Can
Don't Wanna See No Blood, Don't Be A Macho Man
You Wanna Be Tough, Better Do What You Can
So Beat It, But You Wanna Be Bad

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right
Just Beat It, Beat It
Just Beat It, Beat It
Just Beat It, Beat It
Just Beat It, Beat It

They're Out To Get You, Better Leave While You Can
Don't Wanna Be A Boy, You Wanna Be A Man
You Wanna Stay Alive, Better Do What You Can
So Beat It, Just Beat It

You Have To Show Them That You're Really Not Scared
You're Playin' With Your Life, This Ain't No Truth Or Dare
They'll Kick You, Then They Beat You,
Then They'll Tell You It's Fair
So Beat It, But You Wanna Be Bad

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right
Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It

Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Who's Right

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right

Just Beat It, Beat It, Beat It, Beat It
No One Wants To Be Defeated
Showin' How Funky Strong Is Your Fighter
It Doesn't Matter Who's Wrong Or Right
Just Beat It, Beat It
Beat It, Beat It, Beat It

It's reminds me of when Nick was giving me hell 2 weeks ago and tried to beat me up, so.... yeah.
GTG
Kari

527775  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-03-20
Written: (7165 days ago)
Next in thread: 527789

Dear Diary,
        I have been feeling horrible ever since Friday. From coughing, to hacking up crap, to high fevers, to... ear infections? I hadn't gotten one of those since I was 3>.< Well, pretty much all of it is gone.... at the moment. I think the fever hit me the hardest though. On Friday, my fever was so high, I could barely see and walk. Then on Saturday my fever got just as bad and I started hulucsinating things and thinking I was gonna die. How sad is that? Dude! When I cried, it felt good because my cheeks were so red from the fever. I have never been so sick in my dear life! But thank goddness it's finally going away. Mom says I probably won't have to go to school (or what we have left of it) this week ether^-^ And on Thursday me and Kura see each other again, yay!^o^ And I got inspired (finally) to write a new fanfiction. (I haven't written since December 24th, I just didn't seem to.... feel, the writings within me... or something>.<) So yeah, everything's, I guess, going pretty good. Camille's happy, I'm happy, this random guy in the backround is happy....
Random guy: Hey! Leave me out of this!>:0
Kari: -._-.U
Ryan: Josh is my brother from another mother:)
Kari: 0.0
Well, anyway, gotta go.
Kari

524931  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-03-17
Written: (7168 days ago)
Next in thread: 525438

You are the depressed/dreamer anime girl.You either lost somebody you love or somebody broke you heart so bad that you can't pick up the shattered pieces without hurting yourself.You think nobody can heal your wounds but don't stop looking because you never know who loves you enough to try hell the one special guy could be right infornt of your eyes and you don't even know it.You also love to day dream because it seems like the only place that makes you happy.BBut little do you know that people all around you are trying to make you happy and you won't let them in fearing you'll get another heartbreak or get hurt worse.But just try and if things go wrong just brush it off and try again.It never hurts to try.

I think this would describe me the best. The best nickname I got out of St.Rita's in the 9 years I went eher was "Dreamer" I never use to pay attention in class, and whenever the teacher would call on me, my body would be in class, but my mind was somewhere else. Everyone would laugh at the fact that I was never there, so they called me "Dreamer" Kura never abused this fact when I told her, instead, she made it like it was something to be proud of. She's the best big sister in the world, and today she turned 16.
So happy birthday sis, I love you.
Kari

523741  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-03-16
Written: (7169 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        I have no idea why I made that last entry, but oh well! Damnit, I have a crush on Nicky.... AGAIN! We're suppose to be over, but then I had this damn dream and-UG! Love is weird, I don't even know if he likes me anyway. Oh well, doesn't matter, I'll just deal with it. Besides, it is love^_~ Alright, so our school is having a talent show for the first time in all of history. I can do a solo and show everybody how good I am^^ lol, I just don't know what I should sing. I might do "Vienna" cause it reminds me of my home country Italy, lol, I'm just kidding with ya. Italy is just where a lot of my mom's side of the family lives... other than Ireland, France, Australia, Canada, and, well, you get the point>.< Which reminds me, I'm goin' to Ireland in August!! That is SO cool. I'll get to see all my cool cousins again, and show them how cool I have become. (P.S: I hate being the youngest cousins!!!>o<) Dodododododo.... what else is there to say? Oh yeah, I'm gonna graduate this year. From dumb ol' St.Rita's, where I wasted 9 years of my life in misery and pain. Did you know that all the teachers use to be nuns at that school, and they use to sleep in the classrooms?? I mean, WTH, right? A convent that is attached to our school would probably explain that all, but now there is only 4 nuns, and only 2 are teachers. A lot of teachers in my school are from Pennsuvania..... ok, I'm just gonna go on forever, aren't I? I'm bored I guess, I got sick again and if Mom finds out she's gonna kill me! I'm at home right now, got out of school by a cough and a little fever^_~ Oh yeah, me, my step brother Ryan, and Josh JUST fin ished our movie that were gonna send in for this contest. If we win, we get an ice cream party, yay ice cream! It is SO flippin' funny! It's kinda like Napoloen Dynamite except Kari style. It's called "The stupid, the proud, and the jawbreaker" It's basically about this kid named Josh who's pretty much a retard, who loses his *special8 jawbreaker, so he has to go out and find it. With the help of his wiggger friend, 2by4, and his-strange-doll Melmo, they have to find out who took his Jawbreaker. It sounds REALLY stupid, but it's REALLY funny. I was the obsessed hippi girl who had a crush on Josh, yuck:p
Anyway, gtg!
Kari
P.S: 9 days till I get to see Kura!!! 

523735  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-03-16
Written: (7169 days ago)
Next in thread: 523923

Kari: Hey everybody! I have no idea why I'm doing a RPG with myself, but oh well!
[Guardian Pyro]: How did I ever get stuck with you?
Kari: BOWNAGIT!
GP: Your stupid.
Kari: What the flip was Grandma doing at the dunes?!?!?!
GP: You know, you can stop it now....
Kari: You guys are RETARDED!
GP: Alright, stop it with Napoleon Dynamite...
Kari: Kaiba-boy nemo tunego saga!
GP: Not the Japanese YGO....-._-.U
Kari: I <3 tattertots!
GP: STOP IT!
Kari: *stops*

522649  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-03-15
Written: (7170 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        Ug! It feels like this week will never end!! Sure, it just started, but I want it to go by so fast. I'm finally getting to see Kura, but I hadn't realized till now how flippin' close it was! *chuckles* I remember the last time I was going to see Kura, I was so excited, my mood was counting down the days. 3 months went by real fast, I can still remember the night I got back to Virginia, and cried all through-out it even thought I had school because I missed Kura so much and it seemed like I would never get to see her again. I actually cried all that week, but I guess that just makes me a baby. I'm so immature and insecure, it's, like, disgusting. lol. Now time for the humorous interclude!!^o^
Kari: *is dancing and singing to the radio* Cause somebody told me, that you had a boyfriend, that looked like a girlfriend, and-
Kura: Wait a sec, am I the only one who thinkls this is weird? A boyfriend looking like a girlfriend??0.o
Kari: 0.o
*silence*
Kari: Oh well! The song is good and The Killers rock so let me dance in peace! *starts dancing again*
Kura: *sweatdrop*
Kari: Mr. Brightside^_~
c yaz!
Kari

521088  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-03-13
Written: (7172 days ago)

Boys, just do it!----Tell her you think shes cool n why. Tell her she looks pretty. Pick her up and pretend youre going to throw her in the river; shell scream and fight you but secretly, shell love it. Just hold her hand. Pick flowers from other peoples gardens and give them to her.. Introduce her to your friends as The coolest girl I know. Tell her stupid jokes. Write poems about her. Just walk around with her. Throw pebbles at her window at night. Let her fall asleep in your arms. Call her. Carve your names into a tree. Give her piggy-back rides. Stay up with her all night when shes sick. Write on her. When shes sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if shes not saying anything. Look into her eyes. Slow dance with her, even if the music is fast. Kiss her in the rain. And when you fall in love with her, tell her.

Isn't it just CUTE?! Got it from my bestest buddy ever, Camille. She is trying so hard to find love in this, I told her it will come when the time is right. That's what it did with me. Now I'm single and actually pretty happy about it. But I keep thinking about all the good times I had with Nicky. But the past is the past, and it will never come back again. All I can do is look back on the memories and hope things at school will get better.
Kari

517626  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-03-09
Written: (7176 days ago)
Next in thread: 522440

Every day
You push me away
Push me around
Kick me when I'm down
I thought we were friends
Which meant friendship till the end
Guess you proved me wrong
You were just playing me along
Don't tell me you have something say
Cause you already told me what you think of me today
You can go on with your life
But you'll never know what it's like
Yeah, you were smart
Forgot one thing on YOUR chart
Where's the friendship in that?
I'd rather have you pat me on the back
Never mind
Just rewind
Back to a time
When we were fine
But there was always a darkness deep inside
But I didn't think our friendship would collid
I really miss you
At least I use too
Just move on
Sing a song
All day long
Tell me there's such thing as a friend
Which meant friendship till the end
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Yeah, a peom. I guess about Nick. This is copywrited, don't think of stealing>o<
Kari

515627  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-03-07
Written: (7178 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        I'm so pissed off at Nick. He's such a friggin' jerk. You guys just wait, another push to me and he'll be on the floor cryin'. I tell ya, if friends down here in Virginia acted more like friends, maybe this state would be a better place, at least they wouldn't look at this place as gangster invested... place. I dunno, but that's how I look at it. School's been suckin', I guess more than it usually does cause I get told to my face that I'm hated so much. Might as well run away now while no one cares. I'll hang out with my hobo friend and be seen on milk cartens, won't that be nice? I know Kura's probably gonna say ask if I'm alright. At least SOMEONE cares. Not that Camille doesn't *sigh* I hope she doesn't read this, I want her to be as un-worried about me as possible. People just don't seem to think I can stand my own, or even beat Nick up. Who knows? I bet I'm probably gonna get into a huge fight with Nick tomorrow now that he knows what'll tick me off or what won't. I don't want to fight, but my body does. When my adranalin is up, I pounce when possible. People still look at me as a little kid, and I'm being more insecure as possible. I had to sleep with my mom last night it was that bad>.< TK says I'm saying she's a bad friend, but I'm not. I'm just saying Nick is a jerk, which he is. But she's gonna have to take sides on this one. I think it's Nick's side though. Mom says Nick is treating me like this because he still likes me. I say she's wrong and lost on so many levels. But she's just a mom, what does she know about teenager life? She was one a LONG time ago. I miss my baby cousin Emma, I could talk to her about everything. She's 2 and she can already talk. I love her to bits. And me and Kura are gonna see each other really soon, and, dude, I'm not as excited as last time (but I am excited) but than again, I didn't have to wait 5 months to see her again. I guess all is not what it seems. Well, now I'm just confused
C yas
Kari
P.S: Now that I think about it, maybe I was lying to Kura. But it was only to protect her.

514110  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2005-03-05
Written: (7180 days ago)
Next in thread: 514377

Dear Diary,
        Ok, this is for all the *genuises* that asked everyone but me what my problem is. So [Dark Mousy the Kaitou] and bastard I mean, [*raven16*] here ya go. I'm NOT the one with the problem, Nick is. You were giving me the cold shoulder on monday when we shook to still be friends. So what was I suppose to do, stand there and have you say I was a fuckin' bitch every time I opened my mouth? Well, guess what, no. So I fought back, cause that's just how I am. YOU were being the bastard, and I was being one right back. I was hoping to get into a fuckin' fight with you actually, just so I could beat your ass. Oh, and thanks for ALWAYS being on my side Michelle, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside that you don't think I can beat him up just cause I look like I don't have muscle. Well, I guess the saying 'There is more to it than it appears' proves me right. Than again, you should've been on my side cause that's what best friends do, but I guess not. Oh, and don't know how to flirt? Nice 'flirters united' banner in your house, makes me feel even better when I'm in my time of need. But I guess no one really cares, except for the 'good person' Joseph the fuckin' Audrey pervert! Oh wait, HE'S not even a good friend.
Note: Wrote this when very angry, might take it back, might not. I ain't promising anyone anything. Very pissed off at the moment.
Kari

514132  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-03-03
Written: (7180 days ago)

Song of the day:
"Almost" by Bowling For Soup

Print Bowling for Soup - Almost Song Lyrics
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I almost got drunk at school at 14
Where I almost made out with the homecoming queen
Who almost went on to be Mrs. Texas
But lost to a slut with much bigger breastes
I almost dropped out to move to L.A.
Where I was almost famous for almost a day

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost loved you
I almost wished you woulda loved me too

I almost held up a grocery store
Where I almost did 5 years and then 7 more
Cuz I almost got popped for a fight with a thug
Cuz he almost made off with a buncha the drugs
That I almost got hooked on cuz you ran away
And I wished I woulda had the nerve to ask you to stay

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost loved you
And I didn't even know it

You kept me guessin'
And now I'm destined
To spend my time missin' you
I almost wished you woulda loved me too

Here I go thinkin' about all the things I could have done
I'm gonna need a forklift cuz all the baggage weighs a ton
I know we've had our problems. I can't remember one.

I almost forgot to say something else
And if I can't fit it in I'll keep it all to myself
I almost wrote a song about you today
But I tore it all up and then I threw it away! (<love that line so flippin' much)

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost loved you
And I didn't even know it

You kept me guessin'
And now I'm destined
To spend my time missin' you
I almost wished you woulda loved me too(4x)

I almost wished you woulda loved me too

I <3 this song SO friggin' much.
Band geek: a friggin' jock....
lol. I want my next bf to sing this to me, I have no idea why, I just do. I'm gonna play hard to get^_~ (like a man who's not afraid to sing)
Kip: Why do you love me? Why do you need me? Always and forever....
Kari: 0.oU
lol, NAPOLEON DYANMITE RULEZ!!!!!!!
Kari

508929  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-02-28
Written: (7185 days ago)

Dear Diary,
        Well, Wednesday I'm going to Children's hospital. No, I'm not incredibly sick, I'm going to see a 'specialist' or something. To see if I really do have a problem, or if I'm just BSing school. Which I sort of am, but they wanna see if I really do have a attention problem. I think I do, but I am also BSing everything. But than again, I don't know what it's like to actually be good at school, so how can I know if I'm really BSing school or I just don't know how to be good at school. I dunno, it;s just confusing. I think Nick is mad at me, but oh well. He can just be that way. *sigh* My hair's a mess, and I'm actually thinking of a new thing to do when I grow up. Can anybody say actress? lol, I'm actually kinda embarrassed about the whole idea of thinking I should be one. I was too embarrassed to even tell my mom I wanted to be one. But, well, ya never know. Maybe I'll be extremely good at it. Well, I gotta look into trying out for a play or something now that I've got my courage up, this'll be quite a show. lol. Well, catcha later.
Kari

506194  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-02-22
Written: (7188 days ago)
Next in thread: 506547

My B-day!!!^^ Give me some love, dawg! lol
Kari

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