i see it

i see it!
it's there
so unusual
and yet so ordinary
sor weird
and yet so beautiful
it's there
and time slows
and just as quickly
its gone
there, there,
nowhere
up, down,
all around
keep looking
you'll find another
all glitters and rainbow
lipgloss kisses spent
seek and you shall find
but dont look hard
or you'll missit
it's right in front of you
i see it
look close
yet far
and relax.
...
there it is.

MY SUICIDE

ah, my suicide
my music
i love it
no death of blood
no starving skeleton
no 18th hole to the head
i choose to drown
not in water
no liquid is sufficient enough
to kill my pain
no pill toxic enough
i choose to drown
in my music
"i love you, i hate you"
"i've become so numb"
"should i stay or should i go"
over my feet
over it flows
so comforting my old friends
covering my head
i dont flounder or panic
i embrace and inhale
the crash of guitars
the bass
the words of my gods
speak to me
and all pain is forgotten!
all the stress
all the hurt
is lost in the love
the love of unexplainable joy
the joy of words

  Hey Ho, Let's Go! Mkay, it's getting dark outside, not because it's night or anything...because it's getting ready to storm. I'm not going to be one of those blonde, petite, pink, highheeled girls and cry or run in my basement and huddle in a dark corner...No! I shall stand and face the storm! I shall watch it come in, take out the neighbors house....and then i shall run into the basement, yet still watch from the windows...at least until mom yells at me and grabs the back of my pants and hauls me off of whatever i was standing on to see...
neway...i think kyla is mad at me, she barely talks to me and we're not as close as we used to be...despite all we've gone through...oh well, hi to all who read this! and vist gypsy rose, arsenic cherry, and polaroid of purity!