"So many things were testing his faith. There was the Bible, of course, but the Bible was a book, and so were Bleak House, Treasure Island, Ethan Frome and The Last of the Mohicans. Did it indeed seem probable...that the answers to the riddles of creation would be supplied by people too ignorant to understand the mechanics of rainfall? Had Almighty God, in all His infinite wisdom, really been afraid that men six thousand years ago would succeed in building a tower to heaven? Where the devil was heaven? Was it up? Down? There was no up or down in a finite but expanding universe in which even the vast, burning, dazzling, majestic sun was in a state of progressive decay that would eventually destroy the earth too. There were no miracles; prayers went unanswered, and misfortune tramped with equal brutality on the virtuous and the corrupt..."

--p. 295, Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

"Well, frankly, I don't know how long America is going to last," he proceeded dauntlessly. "I suppose we can't last forever if the world itself is going to be destroyed someday. But I do know that we're going to survive and triumph for a long, long time."

"For how long?" mocked the profane old man with a gleam of malicious elation. "Not even as long as the frog?"

"Much longer than you or me," Nately blurted out lamely.

"Oh, is that all! That won't be very much longer then, considering that you're so gullible and brave and that I am already such an old, old man."

"How old are you?" Nately asked, growing intrigued and charmed with the old man in spite of himself.

"A hundred and seven." The old man chuckled heartily at Nately's look of chagrin. "I see you don't believe that either."

"I don't believe anything you tell me," Nately replied, with a bashful mitigating smile. "The only thing I do believe is that America is going to win the war."

"You put so much stock into winning wars," the grubby iniquitous old man scoffed. "The real trick lies in losing wars, in knowing which wars can be lost. Itwaly has been losing wars for centuries, and just see how splendidly we've done nonetheless. France wins wars and is in a continual state of crisis. Germany loses and prospers. Look at our own recent history. Italy won a war with Ethiopia and promptly stumbled into serious trouble. Victory gave us such insane delusions of grandeur that we helped start a world war we hadn't a chance of winning. But now that we are losing again, everything has taken a turn for the better, and we will certainly come out on top again if we succeed in being defeated."

Nately gaped at him in undisguised befuddlement. "Now I really don't understand what you're saying. You talk like a madman."

"But I live like a sane one. I was a fascist when Mussolini was on top, and I'm an anti-fascist now that he has been deposed. I was fanatically pro-German when the Germans were here to protect us against the Americans, and now that the Americans are here to protect us against the Germans I am fanatically pro-American. I can assure you, my outraged young friend" - the old man's knowing, disdainful eyes shone even more effervescently as Nately's stuttering dismay increased - "that you and your country will have no more loyal partisan in Italy than me - but only as long as you remain in Italy."

"But," Nately cried out in disbelief, "you're a turncoat! A time-server! A shameful, unscrupulous opportunist!"

"I am a hundred and seven years old," the old man reminded him suavely.

"Don't you have any principles?"

"Of course not."

-- pp. 254-256, Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

“Appleby was a fair-haired boy from Iowa who believed in God, Motherhood, and the American Way of Life, without ever thinking about any of them...” (27)

“...live forever or die trying.” (38)

“Do you know how long a year takes when it’s going away?” Dunbar repeated to Clevinger. “This long.” He snapped his fingers. “A second ago you were stepping into college with your lungs full of fresh air. Today you’re an old man.”
“Old?” asked Clevinger with surprise. “What are you talking about?”
“Old.”
“I’m not old.”
“You’re inches away from death every time you go on a mission. How much older can you be at your age? A half a minute before that you were stepping into high school, and an unhooked brassiere was as close as you ever hoped to get to Paradise. Only a fifth of a second before that you were a small kid with a ten-week summer vacation that lasted a hundred thousand years and still ended too soon. Zip! They go rocketing by so fast. How the hell else are you ever going to slow time down?” Dunbar was almost angry when he finished.
“Well, maybe it’s true,” Clevinger conceded unwillingly in a subdued tone. “Maybe a long life does have to be filled with many unpleasant conditions if it’s to seem long. But in that event, who wants one?”
“I do,” Dunbar told him.
“Why?” Clevinger asked.
“What else is there?” (48)

“Like Olympic medals and tennis trophies, all they [pennants and medals] signified was that the owner had done something of no benefit to anyone more capably than everyone else.” (81)

“Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.” (93)

“Neighbors sought him out for advice on all subjects, for he had made much money and was therefore wise.” (93)

“Because he needed a friend so desperately, he never found one.” (95)

“He was polite to his elders, who disliked him. Whatever his elders told him to do, he did. They told him to look before he leaped, and he always looked before he leaped. They told him never to put off until the next day what he could do the day before, and he never did. He was told to honor his father and his mother, and he honored his father and his mother. He was told that he should not kill, and he did not kill, until he got into the Army. Then he was told to kill, and he killed. He turned the other cheek on every occasion and always did unto others exactly as he would have had others do unto him. When he gave to charity, his left hand never knew what his right hand was doing. He never once took the name of the Lord his God in vain, committed adultery or coveted his neighbor’s ass. In fact, he loved his neighbor and never even bore false witness against him. Major Major’s elders disliked him because he was such a flagrant nonconformist.” (95)

“Since he had nothing better to do well in, he did well in school. At the state university he took his studies so seriously that he was suspected by the homosexuals of being a Communists and suspected by the Communists of being a homosexual.” (95)

“He was not really surprised that it [telling lies despite being a chaplain] was good, for he had observed that people who did lie were, on the whole, more resourceful and ambitious and successful than people who did not lie.” (107)

“’I used to get a big kick out of saving people’s lives. Now I wonder what the hell’s the point, since they all have to die anyway.’” (119)

“’That crazy bastard may be the only sane one left.’” (120)

“’The important thing is to keep them pledging,’ he explained to his cohorts. ‘It doesn’t matter whether they mean it or not. That’s why they make little kids pledge allegiance even before they know what ‘pledge’ and ‘allegiance’ mean.’” (123)

“People bled to death like gentlemen in an operating room or expired without comment in an oxygen tent. There was none of that tricky now-you-see-me-now-you-don’t business so much in vogue outside the hospital, none of that now-I-am-and-now-I-ain’t. There were no famines or floods. Children didn’t suffocate in cradles or iceboxes or fall under trucks. No one was beaten to death. People didn’t stick their heads into ovens with the gas on, jump in front of subway trains or come plummeting like dead weights out of hotel windows with a whoosh!, accelerating at the rate of thirty-two feet per second to land with a hideous plop! on a sidewalk and die disgustingly there in public like an alpaca sack full of hairy strawberry ice cream, bleeding, pink toes awry.” (176)

“He [Yossarian] could start screaming inside a hospital and people would at least come running to try to help; outside the hospital they would throw him in prison if he ever started screaming about all the things he felt everyone ought to start screaming about, or they would put him in the hospital.” (183)

“Yossarian also worried about Ewing’s tumor and melanoma. Catastrophes were lurking everywhere, too numerous to count. When he contemplated the many diseases and potential accidents threatening him, he was positively astounded that he had managed to survive in good health for as long as he had. It was miraculous. Each day he faced was another dangerous mission against mortality. And he had been surviving them for twenty-eight years.” (185)

“Be thankful you’re healthy.”
“Be bitter you’re not going to stay that way.”
“Be glad you’re even alive.”
“Be furious you’re going to die.”
“Things could be much worse,” she cried.
“They could be one hell of a lot better,” he answered heatedly.
(189)

“’And don’t tell me God works in mysterious ways,’ Yossarian continued, hurtling on over her objection. ‘There’s nothing so mysterious about it. He’s not working at all. He’s playing. Or else He’s forgotten all about us. That’s the kind of God you people talk about - a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements? Why in the world did He ever create pain?’” (189)

“’When you consider the opportunity and power He had to really do a job, and then look at the stupid, ugly little mess He made of it instead, His sheer incompetence is almost staggering. It’s obvious He never met a payroll. Why, no self-respecting businessman would hire a bungler like Him even as a shipping clerk!’” (189)

“’Of course you’re dying. We’re all dying. Where the devil else do you think you’re heading?’” (192)

“There are no atheists in my outfit! Atheism is against the law, isn’t it?”
“No, sir.”
“It isn’t?” The colonel was surprised. “Then it’s un-American, isn’t it?”
“I’m not sure, sir,” answered the chaplain.
“Well, I am!” the colonel declared. “I’m not going to disrupt our religious services just to accommodate a bunch of lousy atheists. They’re getting no special privileges from me. They can stay right where they are and pray with the rest of us.”
(203-204)

“I just assumed you would want the enlisted men to be present, since they would be going along on the same mission.”
“Well, I don’t. They’ve got a God and a chaplain of their own, haven’t they?”
“No, sir.”
“What are you talking about? You mean they pray to the same God we do?”
“Yes, sir.”
“And he listens?”
“I think so, sir.”
“Well, I’ll be damned.”
(204)

“’The one I picked out for you was married for a short time to an elderly schoolteacher who slept with her only on Sundays, so she’s really almost as good as new.’” (244)

“America,” he said, “will lose the war. And Italy will win it.”
“America is the strongest and most prosperous nation on earth,” Nately informed him with lofty fervor and dignity. “And the American fighting man is second to none.”
“Exactly,” agreed the old man pleasantly, with a hint of taunting amusement. “Italy, on the other hand, is one of the least prosperous nations on earth. And the Italian fighting man is probably second to all. And that’s exactly why my country is doing so well in this war while your country is doing so poorly.”
Nately guffawed with surprise, then blushed apologetically for his impoliteness. “I’m sorry I laughed at you,” he said sincerely, and he continued in a tone of respectful condescension. “But Italy was occupied by the Germans and is now being occupied by us. You don’t call that doing very well, do you?”
“But of course I do,” exclaimed the old man cheerfully. “That Germans are being driven out, and we are still here. In a few years you will be gone, too, and we will still be here. You see, Italy is really a very poor and weak country, and that’s what makes us so strong. Italian soldiers are not dying any more. But American and German soldiers are. I call that doing extremely well. Yes, I am quite certain that Italy will survive this war and still be in existence long after your own country has been destroyed.”
Nately could scarcely believe his ears. He had never heard such shocking blasphemies before, and he wondered with instinctive logic why G-men did not appear to lock the traitorous old man up. “America is not going to be destroyed!” he shouted passionately.
“Never?” prodded the old man softly.
“Well...” Nately faltered.
The old man laughed indulgently, holding in check a deeper, more explosive delight. His goading remained gentle. “Rome was destroyed, Greece was destroyed, Persia was destroyed, Spain was destroyed. All great countries are destroyed. Why not yours? How much longer do you really think your own country will last? Forever? Keep in mind that the earth itself is destined to be destroyed by the sun in twenty-five million years or so.”
Nately squirmed uncomfortably. “Well, forever is a long time, I guess.”
“A million years?” persisted the jeering old man with keen, sadistic zest. “A half million? The frog is almost five hundred million years old. Could you really say with much certainty that America, with all its strength and prosperity, with its fighting man that is second to none, and with its standard of living that is the highest in the world, will last as long as... the frog?”
(253)

How may I be of assistance?
(P.S. James, you're rather attractive.)

Hannah Kane
Compare: Book and Movie
A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
Individualized Reading
Term 4, Block 1

a) Classify the book and movie.
Thriller, fiction
b) When/where was the film made?
1971

Seventeen.
What does that mean to me?
R-rated movies in theaters... FINALLY.
No more sixteen-year-old driving curfew. Stupid graduated driver licensing.

But really...

Why do I care?
I can drive myself to Perkins at 3 a.m.
Why?
To do it, I guess.
So seventeen... it's... just... because it's inevitable.

Things to know when reading "The Communist Manifesto"

Babeuf, Gracchus - and the Conspiracy of the Equals: The conspiracy of equality organised by Babeuf and his followers aimed at provoking an armed uprising of the plebeian masses against the bourgeois regime of the Directory and establishing a revolutionary dictatorship as a transitional stage to “pure democracy” and “egalitarian communism.” The conspiracy was disclosed in May 1796. At the end of May 1797 its leaders were executed.


Chartism: the principles or movement of a party of political reformers, chiefly workingmen, in England from 1838 to 1848: so called from the document (People's Charter or National Charter) that contained a statement of their principles and demands. (p. i)

Hegelian dialectic: an interpretive method, originally used to relate specific entities or events to the absolute idea, in which some assertible proposition (thesis) is necessarily opposed by an equally assertible and apparently contradictory proposition (antithesis), the mutual contradiction being reconciled on a higher level of truth by a third proposition (synthesis). (p. i)

Jacobins:  1. Radical or extreme leftists.
2. Radical republicans during the French Revolution. (p. x)

Thermidorian:
1. a member of the French moderate group who participated in the downfall of Robespierre and his followers on the 9th Thermidor (July 27th), 1794.
2. a supporter of the reactionary movement following this coup d'état. (p. x)


averred: declared, asserted (p. x)
bourgeois: member of the middle class (p. x)
egalitarian: asserting, resulting from, or characterized by belief
in the equality of all people, esp. in political, economic, or social life. (p. x)
nascent: beginning to develop (p. viii)

Some random pictures, which I'll post on wikis later :D


Butler Street


A Lad Insane


The Starbucks Effect


Howard Street


Vicinity of Obscenity


Her Aliness


Converse on the Beach


Blue Me and the Trombone


Red Me and the Trombone


Sam and the Creepy Child


Purple Flowers


Shoe


Scary Sam


Self


Converse Shoes 2


St. Matthew’s Door


Tomato


Tyler’s Nose


Final Shoes


Taxi Sign


Weird!


Very Sharp Pants


Psychedelic Bubbler

http://www.education.uiowa.edu/belinblank/programs/naase/about/

"For once in my life I have someone who needs me..."

Good combination: listening to Michael Buble on headphones and bus-snuggling (for warmth... really, iSwear!)

"Sorry if my shoulder is bony."
"It's actually rather comfortable."
"Well thanks! The top of your head is comfortable."
*pause*
"Well, your shoulder is bony, but I'm distracted by the fact that you smell good."

People probably think we're crazy because our idea of going "out" is wandering the sidewalks staring at the night sky. In the middle of winter.

I've suffered and survived
You can't believe that I'm alive
But here I am and I want you to know
That something's changed within me
I can see a different view
Something new begins in me

And all of you who hate me
I wish you would forgive
The way I always have and always will.
It's not like we've got time to kill.
I see now how short life is,
This life not yet begun to live
And so I want to tell you all
That this is where it begins
I hereby commence a life less ordinary
Because when you are extraordinary
(Even if it's in but a little way)
You can raise your heart and seize the day!

Note to Self: ViewletCam
www.download.com

Started a new story today ('round three a.m. while jazzed on Dew). Can I capture a character in a series of magazine articles? Can a reporter fall in love with a brooding rock star balking at her own stardom? I intend to find out.

Today
Hannah wrote on Katie Reth's wall. 5:09pm Hannah wrote on Baylee M.'s wall. 5:05pm Hannah commented on Brigette Holkup's photo. 5:03pmI'm not in this photo...? Hannah wrote on Cassi Ross' wall. 4:59pm Hannah edited TV Shows in her profile. 4:57pm Hannah commented on Amy Skjerseth's note this is just really cool. =). 4:54pm Amy Skjerseth mentioned Hannah in her note this is just really cool. =). 1:50pm Hannah wrote on Cassi Ross' wall. 1:40pm Hannah wrote on the wall for the group Wait...IM NOT MENTIONED IN YOUR NOTE!!!! 1:35pm Hannah wrote on Cassi Ross' wall. 1:29pm

I might be a facebook addict.

Rocky Horror night tonight at Sam's, plus Streak (the show) and working on Mitchell's Christmas present.

I got 31 on my ACTs. Don't ask me how.

Last night we made French Vanilla Cappuccino brownies at Tyler's. We also watched Alias... and it was good.

I think a mix CD of sappy songs is in order as part of Mitch's present.. hmm... suggestions?

"When I was younger, all I wanted to do was smoke cigarettes and wear a white tux." -- Mr. Trilk

First of all, I don't want anyone to be offended by this. It's just my response to something I read today.

Now, onward!

I am not, au contraire to popular belief, feeble-minded. Just because I deny the existence of the great bearded guy in the sky running my life does not make me an idiot. And just because you believe somebody IS sitting up there nudging you this way and that gives me no reason to call you feeble-minded... so I don't.

The facts are this: some of my best friends are Christians. In fact, one of my favourite people to hang around with is going into theology and will likely become a youth minister so he can try to bring more kids to Christ. That's great. Really, I think that at a basic level Christian beliefs and values are good things - no drugs, no pre-marital sex, no hating - but the fact remains that not every Christian actually follows the essential beleifs and values. If they did, I might see some merit to the God way of thinking. But God hasn't smote (smited? I think smote) anyone for awhile now. And then people say, "Oh, that's because Jesus died to save us!" ...ahem, probably not the most intelligent thing to do.

Now, I've read my Scripture; I know the facts, I'm not just b.s.ing here. Jesus had some pretty good things to say, according to the other guys who wrote it down. But that's another of my points: Jesus said it, some guy wrote down what he thought Jesus meant (probably excluding whatever he didn't want in there)... and then that got put in the Bible... which got translated... and translated... and abriged.. and translated.. and the fact cannot be avoided that whatever "Jesus" is "saying" in the Bible was probably never said by him at all. But then, he went and died/was reborn so that the people who deserved to be punished weren't going to be punished anymore? Question mark?

I could be waaay off-base here, but I doubt it.

Things About Modern Christianity (especially Catholicism) Which I Dislike:
-- Homophobia "Love thy neighbour, as long as he or she is not gay."
-- Anti-choice thought "Love thy neighbour, as long as he or she doesn't make any mistakes."
*these are the two which have been bugging me the most recently...*

As for God... how come I have never felt his touch? If he meant me to, don't you think I would? How have I managed to get this far in life so successfully without his presence or the presence of Satan?

Anyway, to sum up - I think everybody has to believe in something to keep going on. Yours may be God. Mine's music and art and love and the essential goodness of the human race. If God is your pillar, good for you, you're a more faithful person than I could ever be. However, I need something a little more concrete to lean on when I need to.

But if you start calling me feeble-minded and continue after reading this, I'm just going to call you a ninny and ignore you.

http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/64428_1164761192.jpg
http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/64428_1164761297.jpg
http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/64428_1164761399.jpg
http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/64428_1164761514.jpg
http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/64428_1164761657.jpg

It's dark and clear, a starry, chilly night. The headlights shine on the black pavement; the engine revs. A beat-up tan pickup goes forty down a quiet residential street. The girl in the back holds on to the roof of the cab and screams wordlessly to the apathetic moon. Her breath is hot on the air; her fingers leave imprints in the frost. Her troubles float away with her echoes, and for that moment, she is infinite.

Popcorn sucks.