[Khwaish]'s diary

26589  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2003-05-06
Written: (7871 days ago)

I wish I could be full of enthusiasm
a sense of inner peace
Inner security
I wish my courage would have the courage to roar
not afraid to be full of integrity
be generally balanced and filled with joy
and be in complet harmony
Not afraid to fight for my freedom
or at least act free
I'd love to radiate positivity
and grant happiness to others
the pleasure of openness
without feeling insecure
To be spontaneous, gracefull and beautifull
certainly is appealing
To be mused
and be a muse for all
Instead of a freezing heart
Give it heat so it'll be forever warm and gentle
To obtain the creativity of a child
To be strong enough to make solid commitments
practising the art of caring, loving and gentleness
To have power and focus
and the playfullness of a toddler
To be compassionate for everything

I'm nothing.

25732  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2003-05-04
Written: (7874 days ago)

how can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where i've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
until you find it there and lead it back home wake me up inside
wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark
bid my blood to run
before i come undone
save me from the nothing i've become

now that i know what i'm without
you can't just leave me
breathe into me and make me real
bring me to life

wake me up inside
wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark
bid my blood to run
before i come undone
save me from the nothing i've become
bring me to life

frozen inside without your touch without your love darling only you are the life among the dead

all this time i can't believe i couldn't see
kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
i've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything
without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more
bring me to life

24972  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2003-05-01
Written: (7876 days ago)

This monky's gone to heaven!
in Dib's greasy hair!

23190  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2003-04-23
Written: (7885 days ago)

A shower of rain
Is like the pain
Between old love and new
So i'll stand up straight
Arms stretched out wide
Face towards the sky
For you

And let the drops mix with my tears
And let the pour wash off my fears
I'll let you go
So long my dear

Oh look
Here comes the sun

21331  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2003-04-16
Written: (7892 days ago)

the cup is not half empty as pessimists say
as far as he sees, nothing's left in the cup
a cup full of nothing for him to indulge
since the voice of ambition has long since been shut up

a singer, a writer, he's not dreaming now of going nowhere
he gave heed to nothing and all that he was, was just a tragedy

so he voyages in circles, succeeds getting nowhere
and submits to the substance first got him there

then in violent frustration, he cries out to god or just no one
is there a point to this madness, and all that he was, was just a tragedy

he feels alone
his heart in his hand he's alone
he feels alone
i feel..

then on that last day he breaks
and he stood tall
and he yelled, and he yelled
fighting frustration, he cries out to god or just no one
is there a point to this madness, and all that he was, was just a tragedy

(The Used - Poetic Tragedy)

20905  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2003-04-14
Written: (7894 days ago)

Saw the Ring last night. Endless images of her coming out of the tv. then i got scared of my computer ha ha. haven't been scared like that in a long time. Sisters coming tomorrow! wooooooooo!!! i must draw...people...haven't drawn in years...must...draw...AARGH!

20413  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2003-04-11
Written: (7896 days ago)

i think i should write in my actual diary...hmmm...

20371  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2003-04-11
Written: (7897 days ago)

Had the crappiest day today. BlOODY HELL. that's all i have to say about it. well...there's more. In a philosophical mood and can't stop thinking about the mysteries of life. all this thinking has given me a headache. I had this bamboo thing..i dunno why. It smelt ROTTON, like petrol and ya know what?? It tasted like it too! EUCH! I had to eat lots of chocolate to get the taste out of my mouth. I always thought Durian was the worst food for tasting and smelling like petrol. obviously im wrong.

20155  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2003-04-10
Written: (7898 days ago)

I'm tired and exhausted from school. Tomorrow is the last day of the 3rd school term!! Hurray! can't wait until the summer...mmmm...i wanna donut! lol.

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