Don't you just hate how you always help everyone but they do nothing for you in return. not even a simple thanx. its just i am always helping people and i never get any pats on the back or anything.i hate the feeling of carrying the wieght of the whole fucking world on my back. for like the 60th time i am told that i am so cold. its just the shit that has happened to me that makes me the way i am. but what i don't understand is that i help people every fucking day and i am still considered a cold person. oh and (you know who you are), i am not trying to get on you or anything. i am just getting this thing of my chest. i mean everyone seems to tell me the same thing about how cold i am,but in ways i kinda injoy the persona of being cold.
till the coldness overtakes me
why these fuckin battles. it seems that i have to always fight with ignorant people until i finally break on there asses. and my friends. i am always trying to tell a certian friend of mine that i care about her ant that i am always there for her and yet she never believes me. then i have to fight my parents about being gothic. accept who i am you dickheads, this is me and this is what i will always be. these constant battles are wearing me thin. i feel that one day i am just going to explode and stab some one. i was 3 feet away from doin it today. god damn. speaking of god. what is this shit. it seems no matter how much i pray, things are always goin from bad to worse. and for some odd reason i feel that i am goin to hell. i can feel it burning a whole right through me. i just wish i could stop being so smart and helpful for my friends. i wish i could get hit by a bus or somethin. Until the cold arms of death embrace me.
god damn these fuckin shit head people. my fuckin parents found out that i am doin wickin and my mom burned one of my books that has all the stuff i need to know. these fuckin dickheads. now my brother is being a fuckin dick sayin he's gonna eve's drop until he finds everything about me. if anyone knows any real curses tell me. i don't want him to die but suffer
this shit is fuckin pissin me off. my mother all the sudden has a problem with me wearin all black. in virginia she could give two shits, but now that we have to some stupid town called norwood n.y. she thinks that we have to fit in with everyone else. she thinks that its one of those fuckin hic towns that everyone is in everyone elses business. i just wanna fuckin punch her in the fuckin mouth
peace
i was so shit faced, i love getting drunk
i wish i had some one to love me like it used to be, love, its what holds u back, is really that great
Sup seen as this is public i won't get "emotional". so far this place is cool. the pics i saw were really awsome. There was a pic done by a gurl named Lauron. She has the same name as an old friend of mine. if Lauron is reading this e-mail me at dragonslayer11