[Earoluim]'s diary

918516  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-03-10
Written: (6467 days ago)

Redeem me for all my sins, and make me feel like I wish.
My longing of night had been fulfilled, my dream feels right.
Mind the perdition at the times of yore, never see the truth.
Sometimes life is just paradise.

Darkness replaces itself with a light as mighty as the sun,
Sweltering withering ones who failed to find the right.
Land of sacred embodiment in which I will to be content.
Something it’s knocking at my door, I tremble to its coming.

How could it rape the way I feel like so,
For it once made love with a feeling that tore my tears from me.
Calling the name in nightfall, I see its previous lost love.
Do with me, whatever you wish, but never make it standard.

My tearful remembrance, ignited among the ruins in my heart.
The roses are wilted and my mind is forever to perish.
Senseless pain in my skin and turning the tables to stir evil.
The bruises of forgiveness are vanishing with the coming end.

Celebrate my reborn world’s logical smothering of fright.
Scratching the plague off my skin, making my blood flow,
It’s all the fault of the ghost of nothingness.
It makes me feel like I’m all alone, without sympathy, or hypocrisy.

Teardrops for a veiled horizon, a price for a stygian guild.
I will run forever through the misted meadows to find decay,
Taken into darkness by the widow’s roots.
Unable to care in a fragile sanctuary, I would give my all to breathe.

Don’t you dare lay a curse upon me, I’ll make you suffer,
But I still haven’t found that what seems to be here.
I’ve been battered and yet I may not give up.
Covered in a veil of blood, I have to find the way towards it.

Not seeing that all that I’m looking for is lost hope.
It’s too delicate for me to breathe, do you still will my laughter?
Cut loose from this world, the false hope lingers here,
How I wish I could be better than what I am now.

Guide me to my destiny, oh Stygian One.
Show me where to linger, aside of you

916233  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2007-03-03
Written: (6474 days ago)
Next in thread:

Invictus


Out of the night that covers me
Black as a pit from pole to pole
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have winced or cried aloud
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody but unbowed

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid

It matters not how straight the gate
How charged with punishment the scroll
I am the master of my fate
I am the captain of my soul.

717983  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-12-19
Written: (6913 days ago)
Next in thread: 916613

why am I who I am . A machine for people to use as they wish. To tease and hinder as they like. To abus eand abuse to the point of brokenness. And then when the machine that needs help asks all who asked for its help show him their backs . Why is this me, why am I willing to hlp those that will never help me, to fight for someone that will not fight for me . Why, why must this be my everlasting road.

634199  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-07-28
Written: (7057 days ago)
Next in thread:

Why? Why must the Earoluim torment me so, take all that I love and leave me in the darkness where all is feared but the none I have. Why must it be so that love is given and then broken away from me with vengence. Why most the heart in my soul be shattered and broken again and again, each time reforming itself just behead the same fait to which it was cast upon. Am I not stong enough, or is this the life laid before my feet taht I walk unconsciously. Were are those that say that my side is where they be in my time of need. Where are those to say that my lonelyness will never happen. Where are those that have heart and concern for me but no ears or heart in which to bear me . Where? Why? Is this my punishment for doing something right? Somethnig wrong for the world in which I inhabit, for not flowing to a crowd but being my own cloud , and single wisp in the sky. Where are to those that say the impossible will never come to pass. Why am I here anymore if my fate is to break the rulse of such around me. why am I here if I can be happy one moment and the next have it ripped away from me for the reason in which that I cannot grasp or be attmitence. Where ? Why? I love the world. Yet no one wanted to love me in return. I loved a soul and they were taken from me by the words of others. Am I not strong enough? Is my love not strong enough for the soul that I love? Where? Why? Tears that have fallen from my eyes for the soul, where they not strong enough? Is my love not strong enough? Am I not? Where? Why?

576749  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2005-05-17
Written: (7129 days ago)

When the blood no longer runs
and the light no longer shines,
all will be lost
but in the coming chaos the shadow will stand tall,
Last of the Three Roses he will wage war on the coming chaos and will prevail.
Until his shadow consumes him he will be lost from all,
For ages he will wonder not knowing the path put before him, he will wonder his place in the world, he will look around him and notice that he is alone. He will be absorbed into the isolation that gave him strength. But in the dawning days of a new age the light will shine on him and a new rose will arise and remove him of his sorrow and his pain and anger. The white light will shine in his heart and give him new and greater strength. And will make him whole again. It will give a new and wonderous meaning to his life. One of happiness and joy, for all times.

                    Thanks my sweet sweet Lisse
                              Kelos
                            

277845  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2004-07-07
Written: (7443 days ago)
Next in thread:

When the blood no longer runs
and the light no longer shines,
all will be lost
but in the coming chaos the shadow will stand tall,
Last of the Three Roses he will wage war on the coming chaos and will prevail.
Until his shadow consumes him he will be lost from all,
In order to find the Ghost in the shadows
the blood needs to run
and the light needs to shine
for this is the greatest power
to revive what is lost in the shadows

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