You know that feeling.. when something happens, and it really, really hurts.. and all you want to do is crawl away and cry, to let everyone know that you're upset, and that what they did pains you greatly.. But you can't. You have to act happy for them. You have to smile and say 'Yay'. And you can't even leave, no, you have to stick around and celebrate with them..

http://jimhines.livejournal.com/364144.html

If you can't read it because you don't have a livejournal, you should make one, it's an interesting thought that you don't see a lot.

Also, I think I want to be one of those people who goes around to schools and discusses rape. I figure that rapists are people, and instead of telling the girls how not to get raped, we should be telling the boys how not to rape.
(that doesn't make a lot of sense because it's just a small paragraph to remind me of my idea, not to explain it, heh)

Yay, it's officially official. I'll be going to SFCC this fall, though I'm unsure of how much financial aide I'll have, yet, as I'm waiting on my SAR information. But still. Cool. ^_^

Dudes. I walked up and down South hill so many times last night.. Ugh. Blisters on the backs of my ankles, my hip socket was in so much pain last night that when I finally collapsed into bed at 12:30, having walked down and up and down and up and down and up _again_, my whole left leg was numb! Like, unmovable. Boy.

Don't get my wrong, I could walk for hours and hours, but that butterfly hill is freakin' brutal.

I am so confused.

I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. Or why I'm doing it. What the fuck.

Today was a bad day.

I go through boys so damn fast, it's ridiculous. I'm sick and tired of it. I'm tired of liking someone, of them liking me, and then just sort of pittering out in a month because of this or that or that. Hank didn't even last two weeks!

I want a relationship. Is that such a difficult thing to achieve? It's amazing how many people will fuck me, and how many people like me, but how hard it is to have a committed relationship. Am I that crazy and unlovable?

I've turned into my mom, and I hate that, but damnit.. I need something to think about, to put my hopes and fears and love in to. And no, I can't have a puppy, damnit.

I really liked this guy. And I liked the last guy. I just don't get it.

"“a little anorexia is hot”?! are you f-ing kidding me?! i think a little bit of cancer is hot. not a lot of cancer… just a little tumor.
and you know what? if a guy told a woman that, she’d laugh and think, “not even an option.” but she hears that guys like a girl who’s nothing but a skeleton with skin and the fridge immediately goes out with the trash."

;-;

Fucking amazing band. Just.. amazing. I love the bass guitar, ung. Seriously. Check this song out on youtube, the music video ROCKS!

Title: Muse - Time Is Running Out lyrics

Artist: Muse


I think I'm drowning
asphyxiated
I wanna break this spell
that you've created

you're something beautiful
a contradiction
I wanna play the game
I want the friction

you will be the death of me
you will be the death of me

bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

our time is running out
our time is running out
you can't push it underground
you can't stop it screaming out

I wanted freedom
bound and restricted
I tried to give you up
but I'm addicted

now that you know I'm trapped sense of elation
you'd never dream of
breaking this fixation

you will squeeze the life out of me

bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

our time is running out
our time is running out
you can't push it underground
you can't stop it screaming out
how did it come to this?
ooooohh

you will suck the life out of me

bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

our time is running out
our time is running out
you can't push it underground
you can't stop it screaming out
How did it come to this?
ooooohh

Gnarg! I have an abnormally awful crush! I hate crushes! Especially when the stupid-ass guy I'm crushing on NEVER gets online, but will occasionally send me a cute little message and -- bgaleha!! It's just so.. onerous!

Arg.

Omg omg omg! Two new obsessions within one day!
Austin Scarlett.. Really beautiful work.. ^_^
Omg!!! Gaylord Ho! Fuck! His statues -- speechless. gnahg.

Rum is my new favourite sore throat medicine.

I love movies where the protagonist female lead gets pushed down 'cus of some flaw, but by the end of the movie she's shown 'em all how amazing she is because of that flaw. It's silly, never happens in real life, but it makes me happy. Makes me feel better about my flab. ^_^

.. Fuck.

http://xkcd.com/263/

I'd become a math teacher, but I fugging hate math.

But I do have a slightly better perspective on Math. I mean, it's the only TRUTH in everything else.

Like seriously, how many of you fuggers can understand this perfectly?

http://hypertextbook.com/physics/foundations/vector-multiplication/

Sure, if you take the time to read it all (as I have done), look up the bits you haven't heard of before (as I have done), and apply what you know and just learned to trying out the different equations, it makes sense.

But before you do all of that, you have to admit, it's a different fugging language. Without having looked anything up, would you find a significantly unhelpful reference to 'Multiplication of a vector by a scalar' funny? Didn't think so.

I'm reading a comic that, at times, is far too intelligent for me.

Yes. I admit it. I do not have a NASA level education. Fuck, I dropped out of High School for fucks sake.

Doesn't mean I'm not smart! Just that college is next year.

Anyways, it makes me inexplicably happy when I read something complicated, with mathematical signs that I barely remember from advanced this or that, and references to people that I've only ever heard of once, in a lecture from a substitute that I don't even remember the name of, and I can UNDERSTAND it and find it HUMOROUS. FUCK. YES. for me.

http://xkcd.com/85/

... Me, too.. isn't that weird? I seriously think about that ALL of the time. ^_^;;

"Christmas morning, Harry woke first, and bounded into the other bedroom in their flat,"

Me: Bounded? So, what, is Harry a deer now?
Josie: Well, his father was a stag..
Me: .. Whoa.. I didn't even mean to faux pas that one..
Us: -hysterical laughter ensues-

For the very first time, out of every book that I have read, every series that I have completed, I am content.

After four long years, and 11 thick, amazing books, I am not sad to see the end of it all. I am as happy as a clam at high tide. I feel .. so wonderful. The ending to the series was perfect. Words cannot describe - even calling it perfect doesn't do it justice.

I am.. so happy. I haven't been this happy, or any where near this happy, since last Christmas, in Romania.

God.. just.. perfect.

To anyone who has yet to read the series.. Please do. Truly amazing. Terry Goodkind, Sword of Truth.

I'm going to sleep now.

..Yay.. Just.... yay.

You know that you're crazy when, while reading a really good book, you stay up until 1 in the morning and then have to muffle your screams of agony in a pillow, to keep from waking up your parents, as something very significant happens that only someone who has read the previous books in this series 10 times before would notice.

So not freaking joking you, guys, my eyes became the size of dinner plates, my mouth opened wide, and I screamed in /pain/ of what just happened in my BOOK.

God. This book is so good.

Omg. Chapter 11 in Confessor is, like, the best. Ever. -sqeeee- I love this book! I never want it to be over!!!!!