[Jino "ChaoS" Silver_flamE]'s diary
Written about Thursday 2007-03-01
Written: (6286 days ago)
Since I rarely post such things here... **TAM TA-RA-RAM-TAM-
Have you ever..?
[*] Given a hickey ([And I really hope it's the mark left on the skin from kisses some times and not something else- I'm unused to such slang])
[*] Danced around in your underwear
[*] Gotten a hickey
[ ]Gone to summer camp
[*] Sang into your hairbrush
[*]Refused to obey a teacher
[*]Cried in public
[*]Made a perverted snowman
[*]Done the splits
[*]Picked flowers from other people's lawns
[*] Walked around in your underwear
[*]Been grounded
[*]Tripped on your feet
[*]Checked under your bed before going to sleep
[ ]Played on a sports team
[*]Spent all day on the computer
[*]Worn black nail polish
[*]Forgotten a birthday of someone important
[*]Had a conversation with yourself
[*]Fallen asleep at school
[ ]Lied to a doctor
[ ]Been to a slumber party
[*]Had a pillow fight
[*]Lied about your age
[*]Made fun of someone to fit in
[*]Stood up for someone who was being bullied
[*]Heard people talking badly about you
[ ]Been called fat
[*]Been called anorexic
[ ]Fainted
[* ~ .:Hana:. ~ *] Went outside in underwear
[*]Worn an article of clothing without realising the tag was still on
[ ]Kicked someone 5 years younger than you
[*]Cursed at a teacher
[*]Cried in front of a teacher
[*]Cursed at a parent
[ ]Done drugs
[*] Licked somebody
[*]Had sex
[ ]Called the police
[ ]Made a prank call
[ ]Stolen something from a store
[*]Said a racist comment and meant it ([Trust me- you have NO idea what Bulgarian Gipsys are like])
[ ]Made yourself throw up
[*]Thought you were going crazy
[*]Doubted your sexuality
[*]Lied to a teacher
[*]Wished you were dead
[ ]Tried to kill yourself
[*]Given the finger to a complete stranger
[*]Been to a concert
[ ] Went to school in pajamas
[*]Hurt an animal on purpose
[*]Broken something that was special to someone else because you were mad
[*]Cheated on a test
[*]Copied off of someone else's homework
[ ]Sworn at a little kid
[ ]Driven while you were drunk
[ ]Been in a car accident
[*]Spit in someone's food
[ ]Ran away from home
[ ]Skinny-dipped
[*]Held a real gun
[*]Wished someone would die
[*]Been beaten up
[*]Beat someone else up
[*]Wished someone would be raped
[*]Wondered what the world has come to
[*]Had a crush on a teacher
[*]Ate so much you got sick
[*]Hurt yourself on purpose
[*]Thrown a glass object so that it broke
[*]Cheated on a boyfriend/girl
[*]Kissed someone you hardly knew
[*]Smoked a cigarette
[*]Broken a bone
[*]Bitten someone
[*]Worn a mini skirt
[ ]Made out with someone of the same sex
[*]Eaten dog/cat food
[*]Stuck gum under a table
[*]Written on a desk at school
[*]Chewed a pencil
[*]Spit on someone
[*]Been spit on
[ ]Driven over your lawn
[*]Told your crush you liked them
[*]Skipped class
[*]Written on a cubicle in a public bathroom
[*]Stayed up all night
[*]Eaten a bag of cookies in a day
[*]Been kicked out of a store
[ ]Put dog/cat food in someone's food
[ ]Refused to pay someone back after you promised you would
[*]Read someone else's diary
[*]Sworn at an animal
[*]Tripped in public
[*]Walked into a pole
[*]Walked into a parked car
[*]Found someone older than you very attractive
[ ]Stapled your finger
[*]Laughed at someone who was seriously hurt
[*]Found a bug in your cereal
[*]Been so lazy you wouldn't get up to go to the bathroom
[*]Fell off the bed
[*]Peed your pants at school
[*]Watched porn
[ ]Almost drowned
[*]Had a black eye
[*]Went rollerblading and crashed into a bush
[ ]Made fun of someone because they were fat
[*]Snuck out of the house
[*]Dyed your hair
[ ]Cut your own hair
[*]Been stung by a bee/wasp (STUPID STINGING INSECTS!!!! I'VE EVEN BEEN BITTEN ON MY F****** THROAT!!!)
[*]Climbed on a roof
[*]Worn gothic make-up
[ ]Had a contact break in your eye
[*]Had food poisoning
[*]Had heat-stroke
[*]Bought an article of clothing and never wore it
[*]Cut yourself on a blade
[*]Fallen on glass
[?]Worn an article of clothing that was lime green (I don't remember)
[ ]Eaten a bug
[*]Eaten something that fell on the ground
[*]Had surgery
[ ]Needed braces
[*]Worn a bikini
[*]Failed a test
[*]Failed a class
[*]Been teacher's pet
[*]Been teacher's least favorite student
[*]Slow danced
[*]Been afraid of the dark
[*]Seriously thought of hurting someone else
[*]Had a cavity
[*]Been in love
98% of teenagers in the US are currently bringing SEXY BACK, Put this in your profile if you are one of the 2% that Sexy never left
Artist: Cherry Poppin' Daddys
Song: Bleeding Ceremony
I was taught to always be nice so I open doors on impulse
Always make room on the sidewalk though I notice no one else does
They just plow through knocking you down
With a smug look on their faces
So I stay home writing my songs in my fantasy oasis
Would it be out of line
To spend the rest of my life in my head?
While I'm running my thumb all along on a razor's edge?
Getting warm in the tub while I'm watching the clouds
Of the blood I spread
But I never said
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
Was DROP DEAD.
I'm a loner, like or not. A Marat. Inside I'm lonely
Purified my masochism in a bleeding ceremony
Light a candle, open my hand, and I'll end retaliations
From the dog pack cowardice here in the gauchest of the nations
Would it be too benign
To spend the rest of my time in my head?
Am I hurting myself to remember? Like Orson's sled?
I've been waiting so long for the words to this song
I bet I bleed to death
But I never said
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
Was DROP DEAD.
Now I hope that magically I will emerge back into life
Even though I'm vanishing now in a hemlock bath of wine
Become a hero swinging my sword in a bloody ancient world
And leave the life here ruined by guilt where they need to thin the herd
DROP DEAD.
Was what I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
Was DROP DEAD.
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
Was DROP DEAD.
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say
What I wanted to say...
Song: God Is A Spider
What's the matter Jesus? Did you forget my name?
I'm the one with the tumor like a flower in my brain
And I have learned to rue the day that I
Slid from my utopia of amniotic slime
God is a spider
God is a spider
God is a spider
Tryin' to block my path
And it's a matter of fate, and it's a matter of love into hate
Mistakes - I wanna make my final escape
My final escape
Mayday Mayday Mayday Mayday
I was born a Taurus, and not a toreador
I can't join your chorus, I'm getting way too bored
And I don't wanna die, I'm gonna plug my ears
Why am I disgusted by the things I overhear?
God is a spider
God is a spider
God is a spider
Tryin' to block my path
Crows in the cornfield, reaper swings the scythe
I know a venomous bird about to fly
Smear the paint 'til the colors run
It's nearly time, I'm nearly done
Flaming orange open sky
And it's a matter of fate, and it's a matter of love into hate
Mistakes - I wanna make my final escape
My final escape
Mayday Mayday Mayday Mayday
And now for those of you, who do not speak Bulgarian... about 90% of the people, who might bother to read my diary... THE TRANSLATION:
Here's a song, that always makes a string in my heart sing...
I spent 4 years after hearing this piece for the first time, in trying to find it.
I hope you like it. ((I've translated the lyrics as literally as possible. I'll prolly work on that some day.))
Artist: Er Maluk ((Translates as R Small, meaning "r", and not "R"))
Song: Confession
I don't know what's happening with me, what has changed,
But I see you now such as you were before,
As if we haven't lived so many days.
I'm thinking how it happened this way?
I see you again only just now.
In this endless moment the time stopped.
Distant, unreal, the world around us died down.
And we are standing still with touching hands,
Speechless of joy, with a child's smile.
I'm thinking how it happened this way?
I see you again only just now.
Ето една песен, която винаги кара една струна в сърцето ми да трепти...
Търсих това парче в продължение на 4 години, след първия път, когато го чух.
Надявам се да ви хареса.
Група: Ер Малък
Заглавие: Признание
Не знам какво ми става, какво се промени,
но виждам те таква,каквато бе преди,
не сме живели сякаш толкоз много дни.
Отново те поглеждам, чудя се ти ли си?
Мисля си как стана така?
Виждам те пак чак сега.
Във този миг безкраен времето се спря.
Далечен, нереален светът край нас замря.
И ние сме замрели с докоснати ръце,
от радост онемли, с усмивки на дете.
Мисля си ка стана така?
Виждам те пак чак сега.
Written about Monday 2007-01-08
Written: (6338 days ago)
http://www.sed
::laughs:: Now that's something you don't see every day!!!
Stolen from [Raziel Ahnara], who stole it from [moira hawthorne], who stole it from [Cia_mar].
I thought it was cute. ^^
LOVE
Tech Support: Yes, How may I help you?
Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process?
Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?
Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do first?
Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your Heart?
Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now. Is it okay to install Love while they are running?
Tech Support: What programs are running ?
Customer: Let's see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge and Resentment running right now.
Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called High Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ?
Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?
Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke Forgiveness. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and Resentment have been completely erased.
Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that normal?
Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get the upgrades.
Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, "Error - Program not run on external components." What should I do?
Tech Support: Don't worry. It means that the Love program is set up to run on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart. In non-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before you can Love others.
Customer: So, what should I do?
Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptanc
Customer: Okay, done.
Tech Support: Now, copy them to the "My Heart" directory. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.
Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files. Smile is playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying themselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?
Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, but eventually everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed and running. One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everyone you meet. They will in turn share it with others and return some cool modules back to you.
Customer: Thank you, God.
God/Tech Support: You're Welcome, Anytime.
TesT SaiD I'M A UnitariaN UniversallisT.
AnD IT SeemS TO SuiT ME.
Go.
ReaD WTF ThaT ActuallY IS: http://www.bel
TwO MistakeS.
2.
TwO FuckinG MistakeS, MadE BY NoT ReadinG AnD ThinkinG ThE QuestioN ThrougH.
TwO AnswerS I KneW.
YeT I FaiL.
FoR TwO LOUSY MistakeS.
ThE TesT... ThE FirsT HalF OF MY DriveR'S TesT...
TWO MISTAKES!
DAMMIT!
I MEAN!
I HATE MYDELF TODAY!
I KNEW THAT SHIT!
I DID!
I'M A FuckinG RetarteD LoseR... :'(
Hm...
I found this... somewhere...
a friend sent it to me...
Lookie!
And help the guy out!
http://www.hel
Hm...
I found this... somewhere...
a friend sent it to me...
Lookie!
And help the guy out!
http://www.hel
My name is kaylee
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I werent ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I cant do a wrong
I cant speak at all
Or else im locked up
All day long.
When im awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks arent home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe ill just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Chariles bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
Im so afraid now
I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
Hes already locked it
And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"Im sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While i lay there motionless
Brawled on the floor
My name is kayleeI am three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me
And you can help
Sickens me to the soul,
And if you read this
and dont pass it on
I pray for your forgivness
Beause you would have to be
One heartless person
To not be affected
By this Poem
And because you are affected,
Do something about it!
So all i ask you to do
Is pass this on!
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE!
PLEASE COPY AND PASTE THIS AND PASS IT
Song: Seen it all.
Artist: КоЯn
I'm an animal
I'm a victim
I'm the answer to your prayers
I'm a witness,on a witch hunt
I'm the monster up the stairs
I'm the ghost that's
In the mirror
I'm everything that you fear
I'm a ripped heart
I'm soul-shot
I'm the voice that's in your head
I've seen it all
Still can't taste it
Smashed to the wall
Brought me to my knees
I've done it all
Fucked up, wasted
Still in my blood
Now inside i'm seen
I'm the hunted
I'm the predator
I'm the answer to the riddle
I'm the up-beat
I'm the hurt-fuck
I'm the window smashed in the middle
I'm the player
I'm the naive
I'm the one who's not addicted
I'm the logic
To the fuck up
I'm the broken one who fixed it
I've seen it all
Still can't taste it
Smashed to the wall
Brought me to my knees
I've done it all
Fucked up, wasted
Still in my blood
Now inside i'm seen
I've seen it all
Still can't taste it
Smashed to the wall
Brought me to my knees
I've done it all
Fucked up, wasted
Still in my blood
Now inside i'm seen
I'm just a child with the tears in it's eyes
I am holding this gift that is broken
what do I have
left now
I've seen it all
Still can't taste it
Smashed to the wall
Brought me to my knees
I've done it all
Fucked up, wasted
Still in my blood
Now inside i'm seen
I've seen it all
Still can't taste it
Smashed to the wall
Brought me to my knees
I've done it all
Fucked up, wasted
Still in my blood
Now inside i'm seen
http://bgflash
GO THERE!!!
You know you live in 2005 when:
1) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave
2) You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years
3) The real reason for not staying in touch with your friends is because they don't have a myspace/email address
4) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing to button on the TV.
6) Your boss doesnt even have the ability to do your job.
7) You read this list and keep nodding and smiling
8) As you read this list, you think about sending it to all your
friends
9) And ... you were to busy too notice number 5.
10) You actually scrolled back up to check that there was no 5
11) And now you're laughing at your stupidity
12) Repost if you fell for it. You know you did!
Written about Thursday 2005-12-15
Written: (6727 days ago)
------Korn
Well I wish there was someone
Well I wish there was someone to love me
When I used to be someone
and I knew there was someone that loved me
as I sit here frozen alone
even ghosts get tired and go home
as they crawl back under the stones
And I wish there was something
please tell me there's something better
and I wish there was something more than this
Saturated loneliness
and I wish I could feel it
and I wish I could steal it
abduct it, corrupt it
but I never can, it's just
Saturated loneliness
Does the silence get lonely
Does the silence get lonely
Who knows?
I've been hearing it tell me
I've been hearing it tell me, "go home"
cuz the freaks are playing tonight
they patched up and turned off the lights
And I wish there was something
please tell me theres something better
and I wish there was something more than this
Saturated loneliness
and I wish I could feel it
and I wish I could steal it
abduct it, corrupt it
but I never can, it's just saturated loneliness
and the bathwaters cold
and this life's getting old
and I wish I could feel it
and I wish I could feel it
and I wish I could steal it
abduct it, corrupt it
and I wish I could feel it
and I wish I could steal it
and I wish I could feel it
abduct it, corrupt it
but I never can,
I never can
never can
never can
never can
The only song to ever make me cry.