[loll]'s diary

589322  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2005-06-03
Written: (7116 days ago)

[x] Heartache [x]


As if life lost all meaning
And everything erased
Right now I'd give it all
To see a smile on your face

But there is no smile
And with your cold lips in mine
All I simply want
Is to leave this world behind

And Im sorry for the pain
I know it's not okay
Im sorry I cant be perfect
Just another rainy day

This time, though
The sun will not come out
Yes, I realize you're disappointed
Is that what this is all about?

The cold tears, now
Running down my face
An ugly image of beauty
All decked out in lace

Nothing left to do
But turn around and run
Chaseing is useless
I'm finished, through, done

Sit by the gleaming puddle
Made all from my tears
Looking at an unfamiliar reflection
Like facing all my fears

Staring at the reflection
I'll just sit awhile and cry
And slowly, so slowly
Whither away and die.
586208  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-05-30
Written: (7120 days ago)

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527141  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-03-20
Written: (7191 days ago)

[x] Blame [x]


 I cried myself to sleep last night
It was all because of you
And when I said "I want to be dead"
That was all your fault too

Last night I cried, I cried and I bled
It was all because of you
And so the sheets were stained in red
That was all your fault too

The moon wasn't out and the stars wouldn't shine
It was all because of you
The sky was ebony and dry
That was all your fault too

You told me that you wanted me dead
It was all because of you
The pills were sitting by my bed
That was all your fault too

Everyone is crying now
It was all because of you
"I wish I could take everything back"
That was all your fault too

Now you can take the blame because
It was all because of you
The sky is now ebony and dry
That was all your fault too
511690  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-02-13
Written: (7208 days ago)

[x] My Suicide [x]


Fuck this world
Fuck this life
End it all with a
Fucking knife
  
Fuck this life
This life I lead
Put me down
Let me bleed
  
Leave me here
Let me die
Doesn't matter
That I cry
  
My whole world
Turned to dust
End result of
Pain and lust
  
Sugar-coating
Worn away
Faith and hope
Strown astray
 
Just a memory
Of a broken heart
Slowly tearing
Me apart
 
Sharpened knife
Slice my wrist
Such a want
For one last kiss
 
Stream of crimson
Splash of red
The pounding heart
In my head

In my ears
The awful humming
Here's the end
Now it's coming

Darkness now
Closing in
Almost complete
My morbid sin

Far to long
Have I cried
Now for my
Bitter Suicide
511702  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-01-24
Written: (7208 days ago)
Next in thread: 651855

[x] Relenting Love [x]

 
 Preparing for my jump
I walk to the edge of the peak
My mind growing foggy
My knees growing weak

Preparing for my fate
I look down to the abyss
Remembering forgotten lies
My faith ceases to exist

Preparing to step off
I close my weary eyes
What have I got to loose?
I have no reason to stay alive

Suddenly he grabs my arm
Slowly, I step down
I look into his tear-filled eyes
And see his saddened frown

He holds me close
And I to begin to cry
I now realise
I do have a reason to stay alive

Love keeps us alive
When we have nothing left at all
But, always, broken hearts
Will die from the fall
467033  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2005-01-09
Written: (7261 days ago)

By: [a phoenix falling] and [loll]
Not completed

why do I sometimes feel so alone?
like my attempts at happiness I go unknown?
nobody here to hold me, nobody to fuckin console me...

Nobody to hear my cry,
Nobody to watch me die.
So all I do is waste away.
Pain, and sorrow, and disarray.

it's all so overwhelming and the sorrow is all consuming.
I don't know what to do.
it's killing me, this is true

427841  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-11-28
Written: (7303 days ago)

Just Another Sappy Love Song.

[x] Stitched Wounds [x]



Before you came into my life
I was wandering, Straying from the things I loved.
I ran in circles, Hoping for direction
Then I found you and found a path

(*)You are my inspiration
You are everything to me
You are the falshlight in a dark room
When I cannot see

My life was alwayz a deep black hole
I was lost, looking for a way out
Then I found you and realized I had found
A new beginning.

(*) You are my inspiration
You are everything to me
You are the flashlight in a dark room
When I cannot see.

You stitched my open wounds.
You helped me up when I had fallen.
You comforted me when I was crying,
Kissed away my tears.
You filled my empty soul.
You gave me something to believe in.
You stitched my open wounds.
You stitched my open wounds.
You stitched my open wounds.

By: Tabbi <3
382969  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-10-17
Written: (7344 days ago)
Next in thread:

[x] Paradise [x]


I have found paradise..
Paradise dwells in a single rain drop.
Paradise is the reflection in the puddle on the sidewalk.
Paradise is in the sorrow filled tear that falls.
Paradise is the icecycle melting on the window pain.
Paradise is the shine in the candle falme.
Paradise is the gentle wing of the butterfly.
Paradise dwells in the bud of an unopened rose.
Paradise is the solitary drop if blood.
Paradise is patched heart that once was broken.
Paradise is the now complete soul that once was empty.
Paradise is the smile on your lips.
Paradise is the glimmer in your eyes.
I have found paradise.
 The logged in version 

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