[S.O.A.D. worshiper]'s diary

544116  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2005-04-07
Written: (7173 days ago)

he is everywhere
at the same time
he is no where
to be found

thinks hes worthless
just a loser
cant do nothing
he is wrong

love him so much
makes me cry
i just want to
be with him

stuck here in this
dead darkness
here forever
silent, cold

wait for my time
he will come
make it all gone
i just know

mind over matter
everthing
ill make this work
no matter what

i am spinning
and im scared
for i know not
what is next

just have to wait
then ill see
what lies ahead
the future

hearing voices
they not real
guess i am though
at times i wonder.....

481176  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2005-01-26
Written: (7243 days ago)

DEMI GOD


ever so gently
whispers among chaos
torn to pices
gasping for air

nervous ticks
guitar solos
killing them slowly
smiling kindly

vibration coothes
tha untamed beast
spiked with care
ignoring everything else

frantic careless
cold and damp
cowering in fear
wanting her to come back





this is a poem i wrote while listening to Nirvana and System Of A Down at the same time, so its likda muddled.....
460395  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2004-12-31
Written: (7269 days ago)
Next in thread: 469830

heres a stupid peom i wrote

SELF DISCRIMINATION


Drownding is this pool of misery
This world so full of hatred
All theese things i cannot see
Its self discrimination


Holding onto nothing
Thinking how i feel
Wondering why im even here
I realize that this isnt real


Trying to find myself
In the crowd
With all the people
Searching for dead


Tangled in knots
Chop off my tounge
Never again ill say
How much youre huring me


I wish that you sould see
All of my dispair
But in my heart i know
That you dont really care


Drownding in this pool of misery
This world so full of hatred
All theese things i cannot see
Its self discrimination
459677  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2004-12-30
Written: (7270 days ago)
Next in thread: 459795, 459796

i hate margerine..... it tastes foul and need to die. whoever invented it should be shot.......

456051  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2004-12-26
Written: (7274 days ago)
Next in thread: 456169

i am filled with guilt and shame, yet i can not find a reason to be.....

"i love you so much,
it makes me cry,
suddenly i no longer,
want to die,
i wish i could spend,
the rest of my life,
warm and safe,
in your arms"

this is part of a poem i just recently wrote for jon erik. he makes me so happy and fills me with love.

454691  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2004-12-24
Written: (7276 days ago)

BLOOD IS THE BASIS OF GRIEF, LOVE, PAIN, SUFFERING, SORROW, HAPPIENESS, JOY AND WAR. BLOOD IS ALL THERE IS. ITS ALL THERE EVER WILL BE......

 The logged in version 

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