[Wes Foxx]'s diary
The Order of Inari is coming along well ^^ today we allied with Roragons United and passed the 10 member mark! Im hoping people will start to show some interrest in the Inari Contest since I want to draw a picture of him but if I do then I make the whole point of the contest, to see what the other members think he would look like, pointless.
Im slapping myself for being so stupid, but Jess has convinced me to stop. We're both just glad we still have eachother. A ray of hope shines in me. Shes 18 now; she can finally move into her own place! if she can and has her own computer, the dream i've been dreaming for a long time will finally come true. I can finally see her every day of the week. Im so relieved and happy, my mind is going into overload and i cant stop grinning
Fate... Fate gives us some of the most precious things we can ever recieve. It gives us true love. It gives us what we need in our darkest hour. It is the thing that makes life worth living.
Usually.
Fate gives us these things to rip them savagely from our arms, not giving a sh*t if it tears apart the holder in the process. It reduces us to cold fragments of who we were.
Why do I say this? Its the story of my life.
I am a loner. I do nothing, like no-one, and plan my life almost happily, dreaming of a solitary existance with no one around me, alone for all eternity.
Then I found her...
[Katori PureHeart], Jess, Lilly, whatever name she is called by, she is the reason why my heart is no longer frozen in the dark cold stone it once was. She taught me love.
But wouldn't you know, since fate hates me, it had a cost.
I constantly found myself struggling to keep my sanity. Her parents are divorced and her mom has no computer, no way to talk to us. She only got on 3 days a week.
Over half of every week I was alone and unable to see her.
It hurt. The stress, the temptation, the rumors, the suspicions, the lies, the sorrows, the drama, the god damn drama was a constant aggrivation, and never left.
We were living a soap opera with a sadistic scriptwriter.
Fast forard past the strife, the betrayals, the hurts, the forgiveness, wounds cut open after theyd healed, lessons learned and history repeated.
Her mom gets a car; her mom is as sadistic as the writer.
She can never come on anymore. Shes been on only one day both this last week and the one before. I never even got to talk to her. Praise elftown for leaving messages.
Now I have to learn to deal with this every single week.
I must be as crazy as they all tell me because I think this is no problemb. On the outside at least. Inside I'm being torn to the shreds by fate.
Well, now ive got my own galary (Foxx Galary) and the order page is still coming along quickly. Uploaded a few new banners/badges to my house as well as a huge one for the order's main page.
Wow. the Order of Inari work is coming along phenominally. we're creating dual type class mergers in the Kinetic Research Labs and were finally starting to see something happen in the Order of Inari RP
Another friend from Battle.net joins today. woot, i need to make a wiki for people from bnet
[Shade] <-the person, duh
That was my first reaction to finding out about what kara did. The drawing I mean. -sigh- Now the feelings I have for Kori have been re-awoken. I love Jess more, yes, but its still basically tearing me in half... damn you Kara... your dark betrayal will linger on even though you've ran away from us all... Oh well. Its just another hurdle I'll get over with the help of my one true love, Lilly. She won't suceed at tearing us apart. On my life, this I swear.
KARA... she made it all up damnit, tyler was in on the whole thing, possibly others as well, they played with my emotions... grrrrrrrr... WE TRUSTED YOU!
Ive created my own wiki page ^^ its a group for people who wanna be part of our kitsune order. as of yet we have 2 1/2 members x.x i wish people would join
Order of Inari
Ive discovered the hillarious comedy stylings of Foamy the Squirrel (who swears. alot. beware.) at http://www.ill
I Am A Squirrel:
and so im a squirrel, and your not
how pathetic you are
so im a squirrel, and your not
your just human, how pathetic you are
you dont have a fluffy tail
you dont have squirrely wrath
you just build to destroy
while i just collect some nuts
and you all suck
I hate how emotionless this is. All of it. The internet is so soul-less with the cold roboticness of text... at least elftown at least lets you make use of pictures to speek your heart and mind together.
No one who hasnt lived online doesnt know how harsh a reality it becomes. To us its not virtual, the emotions are real, we know eachother by name, we could recognize eachothers faces without ever looking at a picture. When it works its the most fun you may ever have. when it fails it makes reality seem like a little kids game. there are so many lies when they dont have to look you in the eye. these words cant convey honest emotion. its so much like real life yet stops short... so close you can almost touch it, taste it, feel it, but if you try to take it in your grasp you find its only a paper tiger, a mirage, fools gold...
Another day another bother. Blah. First day of school back from christmas break. Longest day yet. lets see... I gotta write 8 entrys in 9 days for english, write a story with another kid for the same class by friday, print out a copy of that goddamn latin project thats as tedious as hell could be, and try to sort out my lives, online and irl, cuz online stuffs as crazy as ever, and irl i got about 7 things i wanna do at once. one of those is draw and im outta original concepts for myself, so id love to draw other people's characters. Something to do and i can help someone out. Preferably fursons as im getting good at drawing tha' anthros but im more than willing to draw anything else so long as its not questionable in content (nude, semi-nude, gory, satanistic, biased, etc) and i loathe backgrounds, so give me some to draw, i need the practice.
Hail in the new year with my scannerlicious
i also got viewtiful joe 2, am extremely addicted, but ticked that i cant beat the frost tiger dude.
2-23-05 Vanquished the bugger, got through another mission, but halted in my rampage by another mind-bending puzzle XP -tries to learn how to send an enemy sailing up 2 times higher than he can jump-
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i hope i will)
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i pray until)
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i long for so bad that)
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i cry till im mad)
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i calm myself and tell myself its going to be true)
Im gonna get a scanner for Christmas! (i hope that i'll look the same as im already seen by you)
a weird little lymeric. Im gonna be making character sketchies of all my friends here so be prepared for an onslaught of average artistic scribbles!
ugh. i FINALLY get back on. the place took two weeks to fix it. the motherboard was fried. literally. melted by some sort of mysterious power spike. then they deinfested it from the hoarde of spyware and viruses that called it home. still im stuck with dial up for a while. cant wait for dsl, even if i cant use elftown on my laptop (stupid send cookie T_T) ill still be on wirelessly i hope
grrrr... computer is being one royal SOAB. its FUBAR. its a PITA. basically every acronym under the sun. so if im gone for a few days at a time its cuz we took it in to be reset and get it all re-installed.
Back from michigan. all that time i shoulda been doing stuff. i did nothing. kicked some ass at cousins house on the gamecube. we got antispyware stuff from them too but as it uses cookies, i may be oh so very dead if that lets them find stuff. if i dont come back its cuz fate truly hates me with a vengence that im certain will end any happiness in my life.
Blackness ensnares my senses, all is darkness, hope seems lost. Then a glimmer of Light appears, an old friend who i thought had left. That Light... it brings me so much joy that i can barely stop myself from doing something insane that i may keep that Light with me forever and always, but then the Light seems to fade, draw away, turn elsewhere, and im tossed back into the deepest circles of my own emotional hell...
I pray that this hell will fade again. If i lose my Light my life is meaningless.
ugh... not drama, not on bnet, we had finally escaped the drama, the 3 of us were FINALLY happy... now some serious crap is going down and i dunno whose gonna come out alive emotionally... out of all the people who would have chosen ME to find on elftown it had to be the one person who could drag the 3 of us back into the fray... oiyo. kxukj cavo, thats life.
Eesh, people are getting ticked at me on bnet. im gonna go back and do combat with them probably. hope i live, if not, oh well. wait 20 seconds and let the auto-respawn kick in =P
letting yourself die in a roleplaying fight is no fun. and if its not fun whats the point. exactly. left left x b a x x, activate god mode, and keep on living =)
ps people who rp super-realisti
AAAA! -panic attacks- i put my english journal off for too long, now ive gotta resort to recycling posts and writing random mind blurbs. you think im crazy? you know nothing of the insane levels of insanity i achieve when i so much as post the machinations of my mind O_o lemon foozball finland donut. just a 2 second flash of the randomocity! FEAR MY-
-distracted by a shiny thing-