Well, that break almost managed to help. I seem to be able to channel things like rage now, very useful for RP. LoI Acts III and V will be interresting (see History of Inari for an explanation) *sigh* I think the series may have died though, I can't find the enthusiasm to work on it at all. Then again, theres not much I do seem to be able to focus on or have enthusiasm for recently. Talon being there for me makes me happy. Talon having to go offline makes me sad. Aside from that theres not much to say. If it wasn't for her I'd be taking a 3-day vacation... Maybe I need to take a break from all things online that aren't Talon. Try to get myself drawing and writing again.
Man, I simultaniously feel the urge to hug something, beat the crap out of something, draw something, play video games, get a snack, read, sleep, and fight. My brain is in overload Xx I blame the short hair. CURSE YOU EVIL BARBER LADY! A POX UPON THEE AND ALL THOSE WHO FALL TO YOUR "INTERRESTING HAIRCUTS" WRATHFUL REBELLION!
Damn what the hell, I'm like, PMSing or something. More mood swings than the emotional playground, more ups and down than the rollercoaster that almost killed me once, too poor to pay attention, more random mood shifts than a drunk man with manic-depressi
Each side of me is exhibiting itself before being locked in its cage. There is nothing for them to do but wait to fade, becoming black and sinister as they lay forgotten for more enjoyable things. My inner mind is like a pit of nails into which they are thrust beneith the stony gray skys of a heartless world.
Damn I never knew I had a goth-side Oo I sound like I'm describing my brother.
RANTING! *electric shock from collar* why are you still reading this Q_Q do you hope for some random insight on the mysteries of life? do you wish to watch me as I act like a maniac? do you wish to see me barely restrained by the bars of sanity my medication creates for you? WHY DO YOU STARE? STOP LOOKING AT ME! I AM NOT AN ANIMAL! wait... scratch that last one. I AM NOT A MINDLESS ANIMAL! there me go. and that go I english skill. grammer has go still. *slaps self* sorry, my mind is much to small to wander and gets lost in other places than thought sometimes.
And by this point Im talking to myself. Hello me. Hello me. How am I doing? I'm fine thank me. How am I? I'm fine. Im glad to hear I am ^^ I hope I have a good time with being as crazy as I'm acting. Me too ^^ I hope I do too, I want me as crazy as me if I'm nice enough to be so generous to me like that ^^ Well, I'll be seeing me! Take care of myself. Bye!
Wes: Stop ranting Aric, even IM creeped out now.
Aric: Cant... Stop... The green hampsters demand it... must obey leaf colored rodent masters... then they will give me my precioussss...
Wes: *slap* HELLO IN THERE! *slap* your falling into a LOTR parody! *slap* BAD ARIC!
Aric: Oh dear lord, not LOTR! *slaps self, cries in shame*
Wes: I know how you can feel better!
Aric: Great idea! I'll go get the gun and alabi, you go get Michael Jackson
Wes: No not that plan, besides, that requires a sniper rifle and proof that he's still mortal.
Aric: Oh. Well then what?
Wes: *clicks computer mouse*
Aric: SWEET!
Both: NUMA NUMA STYLE LIP SYNC! *webcam recording, internet fame, legions of parodys all using the same song and everyone agreeing that theirs is still the best*
Great. Ab-so-f***ckin
I can talk to Jess about anything, and I mean ANYTHING. None but Talon have that besides her. Now shes going to leave.
I always loose my friends. Maybe I'm just not meant to have too many of them at once. Like theres some rule in the universe that says when one part of my life is happy, another must suffer. Wow hes got 3 more people who hes friends with, better get his best one to leave. And I thought yesterday sucked.
Now I'm angry. If I didn't know better I'd be punching the walls. I know better only because last time I hit the wall in the basement it took a huge chunk out of the drywall, and I wasn't half this pissed or half this strong. I tried using my brothers punching bag but the metal chain links snapped in half after three minutes of me letting myself vent my pissed-off energy into it so now my bro is pissed at me. I can't wait until he tries to fight me. Its been along time, 3 years of excersize and 5 years with a freakishly huge backpack. Back then I could barely carry a stack of dishes. Now I swing the 60 pounds of books that is my entire locker onto my back with ease one handed. Its been a while since I gave him a reason to stop fucking around with me. Im too pissed to censor myself anymore. I'm going to beat someones face into the ground, be it mine or the first person to piss me off. I dont give a shit.
God...
I need to take a break... my online life is going to seriously fuck up my regular one if I start beating down guys 'cuz the person who understood me better than all but one other person in this entire god damn world is gone. See you all on Wednesday.
~Aric
Great. my day is just going sooooo awesome. Im doing a wonderful job of being a dumbass and digging up painful memories for jess, depressing myself to no end, talon hasnt come on yet and theres only another 2 hours until she has to go to bed, and i have a crapload of homework to do with grading period tests looming everywhere for the next 4 days, with hair cut twice as short as I can stand, everyone at school taunting me about it, this damn pain in my mouth, and talent flushed down the crapper. what a freakin' high point in my life. that was sarchasm, yes.
Ya know how my self esteem is usually REEEEEEEEEEALY low? today I learned I can achieve a level of negative self-esteem that rivals most peoples positive self-esteem.
Leeeets see whats up.
Jess and saphy are starting to have troubles because saphy doesnt think she deserves jess and is never on. That'd be quite bad.
I got my hair butchered and ever since Ive lost almost all forms of creative talent except RP, but they are, as slowly as my hair, coming back. Also blah.
Talon and me are high on life, but shes not on right now. Thursday is her birthday too. Good (except for her being not on at the moment)
I got my poem on fate featured. Now I have a shiny new colored poetry badge. Thats gooooooood ^^
My jaw is swolen behind my left back teeth and now its bleeding constantly, and it forces me to keep my mouth open. Not fun.
This is possibly being caused by my wisdom teeth, which means surgery which scares the f***ing hell out of me. Baaaaaaaaaaaaa
Uhnnn... damn sinus headache, my eyes are killing me... Must try to finish avatar request for talon... *falls into a coma* ugh... too late at night, *hugs a talon plushie* need sleep, sleep lets me dream of my beloved talon, sleeeeeeep gooooood.... -zzzzzzzz-
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Due to a miscommunicati
Wow Oo I searched through the entire Furcadia patch archive to find stuff for my avatars, and got some more portrait sets, which if im not mistaken i may be able to upload as standard furcadia so that I can take even more portraits for badges pictures
I can do these species in most colors you want, just message me
Jess found another page with a nice one for her.
More random avatars:
uhn... god... damned... cold bug... its hitting me with everything its got today. my nose is so messed up its almost numb... my throat would be in agony if i wasnt on so many painkillers, probably why my nose is numb, but it still throbs painfully every time I cough, which is- *DAMNIT* -often enough to make me wanna fall back asleap. Thats if my lungs will let me, they're cut down by like 30%, no way in hell even if i could have gone to school id make it past gym...
I hope Talon comes on soon. v.v even with all this stuff wracking my body, the thing i want more than any of it going away is just to be able to talk to my angel...
I love you Talon.
Jess got an avatar for herself first, but I made this badge version
I also, of course, made one for myself ^^ It looks like Im wearing my green trenchcoat
We tried to do one for Talon, its white like her cat form but its fox Oo
Heres the cat version of it
Got Andy's character too =P
Words cannot express the deep and boundless love I have for my mate [Just Paula], shes such a wonderful person. She makes me feel like I'm important (something that I haven't done in a long long time). Shes the first one to really crack that dome of self-neglect and non-existant self-esteem. She makes me feel like I could run a 6-minute mile if she was at the other end of the road. (im a 12 minute-miler as it is, btw, pretty good for a 16 minute pace body, no? x.x) Theres alot more that I want to shout to the world but I'd embarrass both of us, since that stuff is private, so I'll shut up before I end up with perverts messaging me for details... d'oh ><
If your wondering why I don't just un-say stuff is because thats not how it works in real life. I do my level best to make this reflect the true me. Wes is the anthro extention of the human Aric.
Gah, damnit, I hate this cold. I woke up on sunday with my throat like someone stuck a drillbit down my throat at 10K RPM. Now my chest, nose, and throat are blocked solid. This must be what athsma is like. Damnit, I can tolerate a runny nose but when you can't breathe through it even the tiniest bit >< It makes my already mumbley voice damn near unintelligable
Random topic. The kind of poetry were doing in English is hillarious yet rather stupid. Its called Imagism. Think of it is literary modern art. You know, a single red paint stroke on a blank canvass, a floor randomly covered with broken glass in no arrangement, just randomly scattered. There was actually that very piece of art in the St. Louis museam of art. Back to that in a minute. It was so literally random, for a while they swept some of it to the side and created a walkway through it. Its placement apparently had NO real artistic value. I could tell when they put it back sans-path that it wasn't done with any effort. The little pile that was in the middle with a shard shaped like a pawprint was now laying six feet off to the side. You can, and they've PROVEN it, take a bunch of preschoolers and set them with fingerpaints on a giant canvas, put their stuff up in a modern art galary and label it with a famous modern artist, and the critics will praise the skill and effort required to create it, commenting on its masterful choice of color distribution. Literally, your four year old kid CAN draw that.
Anyhow, back to San Louie. If you didn't know, my dad is a Lutheran pastor. We lived in St. Lou for 2 years, took a yearlong vicarage to Cleaveland Ohio where we lived, then moved back to the Arch city for a final year. That place kicked ass. You could bike anywhere you needed to go where we lived on the seminary (pastor training) campus. The schools were kick ass, the kids were friendly and your next-door neighbors. (not just duplex, quadruplex housing with a few triplexes, we got pictures around here somewhere) It got hot as hell in the summer and still managed to have some kickass snow some years.
The backyards were t3h $h!t. The rock fortress, sandhill dune, the jungle cliff, Pillar perch, the tree in front of quad 14 that was PERFECT for sitting in that overlooked the sandhill dune in which my dad built some stone stairs to climb up and down that eroded sonofa*****, the double football field/baseball field/triple soccer field combined with the natural heavy winds (I <3 wind) made it the IDEAL kite spot, the tennis courts (all 6 of them) the hill the apartment plexes were on you coasted down and down and down, down to the parking lot with the dumpster from which we'd pull random things like packrats, building inventions and creating acids to burn throught the giant bolders that created the stone fortress, chasing rabbits through the nice empty woods around the rockpile for no reason at all, at the bottom of the hill near the lot. The lot was there for the huge, damn i dont even remember what they called it. It had a basketball court, fencing courts, racketball, handball, a weight room, and a place to buy the balls for volleyball/ten
Traveling past that beloved courtyard and its own perfect sitting-tree, the same courtyard that held the office of the psyciatrist me and my bro went to twice a week for a while just to PROOVE we were crazy and get myself diagnosed with my ADHD, you go past the chappel, the fan vents in the corner outside were covered with grates so it was like a wind-tunnel for people with enough bravery to stand on those grates, its rather creepy, like walking over glass walkways. Inside was the baptismal font which my dad could analyze just as well as the windows, the huge huge huge chappel in which we graduated and found we would be called by the church here in Hebron Indiana, the night my dad took me to midnight Tenebrae service when i couldn't sleep, the fieldhouse, no wait, thats the sports thing, the community house was just beyond that before you'd looped back to the football fields and apartments at the top of the hill, the community house had an arcade, mini-restauran
Going out beyond all that was the winter hill, where my family would take an air matress and use it like a GIANT snow sled, that hill where my bro hit a jump/bump and got his ass winded when he landed, where some guy who I didnt know randomly decided to let me try his snowboard, which i did and was really damned good at it, bet im not anymore, the hill and grounds where the fair was held once a year, the park below becoming as decadent with food and fair as the Octoberfest on a massive scale, beyond which was a short bikeride to the middleschool or beyond the gradeschool, both of which had the most kicking of all ass schoolyards.
Holy shit, id forgotten about that... Back at the grade school when i was in 4th grade there was this giant concrete overhang. We'd get those super bouncy playground balls and blast the shit out of them against that, bouncing them off the concrete wall ceiling and pillars behind us, like dodgeball extreme. Id sit right there eating lunch by myself, forever a loner, finishing my cold lunch and joining in, then dominating them at foursquare. Anyhow, digressing ultra majorly....
Back on the campus, a long straight drive straight off along the windowfront side of the chappel, past the community building, along the fields, right ahead of you loomed our personal radio station. My dad was listening to it when it was hit by lightning in that one of many many super storms. just beyond is the park they were building in the open space, a playground type affair, which became our pokemon card trading grounds. It replaced the cul-de-sac two-thirds up the hill near 'plex number 40 in which we lived our last year, playing our at the time brand new gameboy colors, trading pokemon in Red and Blue, looking forward to when Yellow would come out. Dont forget to lock up your bike, its like your car and asshole adults would occasionally swing by in a pickup and try to steal our bikes even after they put up fences. Finally return home, climb the stairs to the second floor, at the top of the stairwell to apartment D, whether at the top or bottom of the hill we were always in block D. Living room with our white couch and the TV, left to dads office with the computer, lazing the day away playing Sim City 2000 on our old Power Mac, the pc-mac hybrid computer, turn around to the door we couldnt open cuz it led to block C appartments, the tiny kitchen and dining room space, down the hall. Left, parents room with their bed, the soft purple-blue carpet thin and soft underfoot, the couch forming even more of a hallway. out the parents room down the hall is bathroom, turn right before you enter and me and my bro's room, our black bunk-bed gleaming where it rested, myself always taking top bunk even though i hated having to climb in and out of it just because I was the lighter of the two of us. We would keep those electronic pets under our pillows, waking up hoping they'd survived you being asleap. The streetlights and passing cars lull you to sleep to the gentle electric glow, knowing when you woke up you could count on a nice hot breakfast before you biked to school, weaving through our secret trail and flower grove to the street just behind the school, along which you would wind without cutting across on halloween, when not strafing up and down the hill hitting on every building times four apartments, major candy hauls and everyone so close together like that creating huge comeptition to do the best. Fast forwards or rewind to summer. Lazy hot days in a city where fireworks were legal to buy and use. Watching my dad launch bottle rockets right out of his hand in the downpour of summer storms. The storms were breathtaking. Water falling in solid curtains, dense as fog, lightning everywhere, striking the tree beside our plex on our side of the building, hitting the radio tower, spawning tornadic clouds that swirreled ominously overhead while taking on a sick lemon-lime hue as the basements, all of which were communal to your plex and could only be reached by going outside, sometimes flooding as the sump-pumps overloaded, some basement 3 feet underwater before they created divert hills for the rains.
Playing in the sun, always having fun, dozens of friends, physically fit and active, tons to do but only if you wanted to do it, all in easy reach for anyone who could pedal.
Dear god do I ever miss it. I'll save ranting on the arch and museams for another night.
Just felt like sharing a piece of my life ^^ ~Aric C. Boshoven~
Finally! Its all done! Written! Complete!
The Legeands of Inari: Act I!
Im not gonna start the next one for at least a week >< waaaaaaaaaaaaa
*sniff* I wish Talon would come on vV
I woke up with the demon lord of sore throats plauging me, but over the course of the day my dear [Just Paula] has made me feel all better ^^
Im also now addicted to this song parody website
http://www.bob
I'll FINALLY be finishing Act I tonight! I swear it!!! Anyhow... -ahem-
I just realized something... Saphy never came on today... and also, the only reason that i only just noticed it was because jess never logged on either... very very odd... I hope they haven't run off to secret accounts, cuz then thatd just suck and be boring.
Life truiths written by a friend my wonderful gf [Just Paula], the second paragraph written by her herself.
there are days when a person can look out a window and see all the happy people with there friends and there lovers and the person who watches thinks, what happend to my life and why arent i as happy as them. i think i may have figured out an answer. there are many people on this planet who just arent what others want around them people who sicken the normality of human sociaty. so when i my self see those happy people i dont wonder i slowly close the curtain and bask in the over welming comfort that i am alone and that i dont have anyone to put a show on for to impress. i am myself i am the one who is told there not attractive or funny to the others who is and will allways be the type that sits by themselves at a park or a lunchroom and thinks deeply about how it could have been if you werent you. you popular people who whine about how hard it is to be you with your many friends and your grand love for life. think just once about how it might be like for the other side. think of the last time you invited that weird person to a partie or when the ugly kid was asked out maybe that ugly kid has the heart and soul you have been searching for. those of you who are beautifull and popular in your shallow lives might think we are bitter and jelouse of you and maybe we are but think to your self in all your times of happyness and joy around yer friends when you made fun of the other half and they fiight back the tears dont they have the right to be bitter dont they have the right to hate you because they dont have the right clothes or the wonderfull looks deep inside they know there ugly but this is an ugly world and one day those who are popular and beautifull will get theres and they will be ugly like the rest of us
the point im trying to get across is that just because someone is not particularly pleasing to the eye doesnt mean they are not fun to hang around with.. or even to fall in love with. next time you see someone sitting lonely in a corner go talk to them... it might not mean much to you but it could mean a lot to that person