*Sighs* My depression is strong today. Just my music list says it all. From the song underneith this entry to Only Time by Enya to Beloved by VNV Nation (my classic depression song, aka Eternity Awaits) I'd probably be stared at with worried looks if people actually bothered giving me a second glance nowadays. But they don't, won't, and can't, so I'll just take that god damned vacation again. I don't know how long it will be this time but trust me: it will probably be quite a while.

BRAND NEW LYRICS


"Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't"


i am heaven sent,
don't you dare forget.
i am all you've ever wanted,
what all the other boys all promised.
sorry i told. i just needed you to know.
i think in decimals and dollars.
i am the cause to all your problems,
shelter from cold. we are never alone.
coordinate brain and mouth.
then ask me whats it like to have
myself so figured out.
i wish i knew..


i hope this song starts a craze.
the kind of song that ignites the airwaves.
the kind of song that makes people glad
to be where they are,
with whoever they're there with.
this is war.
every line is about,
who i don't wanna write about anymore.
hope you come down with something
they can't diagnose, don't have the cure for.
holding on to your grudge.
oh its so hard to have someone to love.
and keeping quiet is hard.
cuz you cant keep a secret
if it never was a secret to start.
at least pretend you didn't wanna get caught..


we're concentrating on falling apart.
we were contenders, we're throwing the fight
but i just wanna believe, i just wanna believe,
i just wanna believe, in us.


Oh, we're so c-c-c-c-c-controversial.
we are entirely smooth.
we admit to the truth,
we are the best at what we do.
and these are the words you wish you wrote down.
this is the way you wish your voice sounds,
handsome and smart.
oh my tongue's the only muscle on my body
that works harder than my heart.
and its all from watching tv,
and from speeding up my breathing.
wouldnt stop if i could.
oh it hurts to be this good.
you're holding on to your grudge.
oh it hurts to always have to be honest
with the one that you love.
oh, so let it go..


we're concentrating on falling apart.
we were contenders, we're throwing the fight
but i just wanna believe, i just wanna believe,
i just wanna believe.
we're concentrating on falling apart.
we were contenders, we're throwing the fight
but i just wanna believe, i just wanna believe,
i just wanna believe, in us.


this is the grace that only we can bestow.
this is the price you pay for loss of control.
this is the break in the bend,
this is the closest of calls.
this is the reason your alone,
this is the rise and the fall.


we're concentrating on falling apart.
we were contenders, we're throwing the fight
but i just wanna believe, i just wanna believe,
i just wanna believe.
we're concentrating on falling apart.
we were contenders, we're throwing the fight
but i just wanna believe, i just wanna believe,
i just wanna believe, in us.


~~~

Beware the incoming rush of teen angst and seemingly unprompted agression. I'm getting into one of my pissy moods and I feel like resisting the urge to take the usual vacation.

Gah! Once again our internet took a mysterious dive. Damn local ISP, even if it IS broadband.

Well the battle between kara and jess over kat is over now it seems, kara's left ElfPack and kat and jess celebrated their quarter-year anniversary. Sadly kat's gonna be gone for a few weeks so jess is gonna be lonely

Finally got to talk to paula some, but then she had to go again. At least it was her last day of school so hopfully she should be able to be on more.

I'm gonna be online a bit less during the day, though still pretty frequently. I'll be mastering all my gamecube games, reading Redwall books, and watching tv, movies, and re-reading my online stuff, from webcomics like http://www.dominic-deegan.com to story archives like http://www.furnation.com/bluefish/nwa/ to watching flashtoons like http://www.illwillpress.com

http://clairvoyance.hp.infoseek.co.jp/nightmare.html

My mind works this way too sometimes. Especially the way they can summon weapons made of energy like that.

great vV we just had to watch Pirates of the Carribian with our family friends visiting us here in indiana on the one night in what seems like forever that Paula was on. I never get to see her anymore, damnit, I miss her Vv

Random rememberance; I've been a member of Elftown for 9 months today ^^

I finally got around to creating an Elfpack account (Wes Foxx of course) for those people I know who are on there as much as/more than here. God its so drab-looking and cyber-whorish, if people here who use this place as a brothel or chatroom for random pointless flamer stuff could go there, they'd never come back and leave us alone.

Here's a list of all the videogame MIDIs I got online recently for no apparent reason =P

-12 LoZ: Ocarina of Time
  -Hyrule Castle Courtyard
  -Epona's Song
  -Lon-Lon Ranch
  -Saria's Song (Remix)
  -Minuet of Forest
  -Bolero of Fire
  -Serenade of Water
  -Nocturne of Shadow
  -Song of Storms (Windmill music)
  -Requiem of Shadow
  -Gerudo Valley music
  -Prelude of Time (Extended ver.)
-7 Super Mario 64
  -World 1: Bob-om Battlefield
  -Underwater theme
  -Bowser's theme
  -Metal Cap music
  -Wing Cap music
  -Mario theme
  -Mario theme (SSBM)
-5 LoZ: Majora's Mask
 -Sonata of Awakening
 -New Wave Bossa Nova
 -Elegy of Emptiness
 -Song of Healing
 -Happy Mask Salesman theme
-3 Tetris
  -Original, Synthesized, and Piano versions
-2 Dr Mario
  -Virus! (Dr Mario)
  -Dr Mario theme (SSBM)
-2 Super Mario Land
  -World 3: Ruins theme
  -Victory/Credits music
-2 Paper Mario
  -The Dojo Master's theme (PM1)
  -Doopliss's theme (PM:TTYD)
-2 Starfox
  -Corneria (SSBM)
  -Thorntail Hollow (Starfox Adventures)
-2 Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  -Opening Music
  -Earth God's Lyric
-1 Pokemon Colloseum
  -Mirror B's theme
-1 Yoshi's Story
  -Opening music
-1 Final Fantasy VII
  -Victory theme
-1 Banjo Tooie
  -Jinjo Village

I randomly decided to say that I totally agree with Foamy on this.

Warning: Heavy swearing!!!

Turns out my mom forgot that I needed a ticket thing to take the S.A.T., and I also have no ID. Therefore, no test. At least not until next year.

I found the other Zarla flashtoon!
http://fchan.hentaiplanet.net/flash/src/Slalomicidal.swf
Zarla is the character from the Reanimator flashtoon I've been trying to get people unsucessfully to watch.

v.v well, it turns out that Paula's been gone because of school. she's also busy with other stuff. Whatever it is, I'm left sad and bored. I call it mellow, most call it depression.

no one talking, nothing to talk about.
not doing anything, nothing to do.
No more school, the last of my enthusiasm gone
No more roleplaying, my brain's creativity atrophies
No Paula online, ... ... ...
*sighs*

Schools finally out, and i got our english class compelation album of all our favorite songs. This one makes me sad after hearing the story of the person who chose it. "Butterfly Kisses" was a song the girl sings to her own dad whose being forced to spend less and less time with her due to work. Its a story of how a father loves his daughter so very much and vice versa, and how the daugther is growing up and they're growing apart... 6 or 7 people in our class were crying on the outside and everyone was touched.

(That means I have 40 new songs, and like about 8 of them XP stupid people in my class are all these stupid rap fans. Note the one letter difference between rap and crap, and note that its no coincidence.)

And this is a nicely done example of why I stress balence in everything. http://www.dominic-deegan.com

*yawns widely* seems ive been doing that alot recently, for no apparent reason. I'm gonna take a nap after I finish writing this, during which I'll think of Talon some more. She really needs to come on more, I miss her alot.
*hugs and snuggles*

Oh joy, its time for *trumpet flourish* FINAL EXAMS!
1st hour: Algebra II - Doom rating: 2/5
2nd hour: Core PE - Doom rating: 1/5
3rd hour: AP Latin Literature - Doom rating: *Completed*
4th hour: Chemistry - Doom rating: 4/5
5th hour: US History - Doom rating: 3/5
6th hour: American Literature - Doom rating: 2/5
7th hour: 2-D Art - Doom rating: *Completed*

Take Elftown Back!
Stop the messaging evils known as Hi-Mail!

And let there be food! *wanders off for some supper*

*Salutes* Today is a day on which we barbeque, have fun, and get out of school, all freedoms given to us by the REAL reason we celebrate today, the thousands and thousands of men and women who gave their lives, both figurative and literal, so that we and others may live freely. Every day we fight on in Iraq, dozens if not hundreds of people are given the freedom to live without fearing death, by the sacrifice of 3 or 4 willing to give them that freedom, by people who give their own lives for a very different reason. This is why I support the war and the efforts (yes, even the president. got a problem with it, bring it on, b*tch, he's done a fine job as far as I'm concerned, better than that looser Kerry could ever have done. Regardless...)

We will never forget your sacrifices.
 ~To the men and women of the USA Military, Navy and Army, we will always remember what you gave for us. Semper Fi~