today was crap. that is the only way i can explane it. im in trouble with school because of a certant person. i got all of my graet grandmas furneral things. you know that was the perfact end to a crap day like today. it gave me an excuse to cry. i got out all my fustrations from school out along with the boyfriend trouble ive been having. i cryed till i couldnt rember y i was mad. but then i just had to remember about what happened after school and all the hate was back. i hate myself, i didnt give him anything for our one month anniversery, but then again he didnt even kiss me today so maybe i shouldnt feel so bad. i dont think he wants to touch me. or date me for that matter. i wont be too suprised when he dumps me tomorrow. ill be heart broken but not suprised. im not good with relationships and im amazed hes stuck with me this long. i mean im not the nicest person who ever lived. i hung up on him or his family 4 times today. the only person at this moment i can thinks of that isnt mad at me is justine. and thats pushing it.

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