kay on the topic of this whole confidence thing which i keep talking about....
I realised that :
if your confident as a person, you can pull of almost anything. Even if you have no ideea what your doing
I <3 you
it made a lot of sense to me
Ryan and I are....: Smokey and shorty
Im sorry. I have a husband. His name is Nicholas He is So beautiful mmmm all mine
Really sleepy...
gah.
-Got to school (extreamly cold).
- On the bus I was just huddled up in the corner, and i managed to fumble my Cd player out. no batteries.
-Ian offered to stay inside with me while the other lunatics waited outside in the coldness. that was nice of him seen as I did poison him just yesterday.
-Drama. Aragh. Our next assessment is a two minute long monologue.
not good
*_*Hehe piano went pretty well actually *_*
*_*I played one of my peices really well... *_*
*_* my piano teacher asked me to play at a concert this may*_*
*_* oh my gosh*_*
*_*I am a pianist *_*
*_*Love me *_*
*_* So much*_*
*_* Its cold in this house.*_*
*_* Where is the goddamned heating*_*
*_* This is england you know.*_*
*_* ugg. whats going on with this world. Anyway. Vag called.*_*
*_* Phil picked me up today. He sorta dislocated my ribs. ouch*_*
*_* Matt is so funny. he makes me giggle.*_*
*_* Religious education was so kewl. I poisoned Ians eyes with ink from his fountain pen.*_*
*_*He swore he would NEVER give me a fountain pen again. *_*
*_*Haha. we'll see about that *_*
*_*Exams in two weeks. uh oh speggetio.*_*
*_*How come i dont know these things ever? *_*
*_* EVER?*_*
Spoke to David today. After a long time.
I simply said to him.
"David I am not going to continue i g n o r i n g you or disliking you, because quite frankly its a waste of my time and my energy. However, I what you did was low, Infact it was past low, but now its in the past. I dont know what you must have possibly got out of it. If it made you feel more important, involved or just good about yourself. It definatly didnt make me feel any of those things. But you know what?I hope that you felt like it was worth it."
He just said : "Im sorry Mally, but you cant go on like this.."
To which I replied.
["Trust me. I can. But I wont because you're right, its not worth it. Especially You. I can forgive you, but i cant forget it. Bye]
*And then i walked away*
I was so proud of myself. I didnt totally loose it. I didnt shout or [s. c . r . e. a. m]. I said eactly what i needed to say, and then left it.
Its just that I realised that theres no use constantly fighting. For what? Anyway? What do I really get out of making ascene? Sure, some attention maybe, and maybe i can realease some anger, but im just releasing it into another form. If i just let it go, accept it, and get on with my life, all the hurt or anger, or whatever i do, or did feel in me, can totally go. Instead of just being transfered or kept inside me.
I dont need attention.
I dont need to make a scene.
Although he pisses the Shit out of me. He was right. What is screaming about it really gonna do anyway? Nothing.
My point exactly
I hope things are okay
[In Religious education today, we were talking about prejudice against gays....because we do that sometimes O_O]
Teacher: Generally Gay men are more prejudiced against that gay women....
me: *super loud* YAH BUT GAY WOMEN ARE HAWT.
*everyone stares at me*
me: Im not a lesbian. Honestly.
[Kay this one we're talking about transvestites...I love R.E]
Teacher: So just imagine if one of your male teachers came to school in a dress...
me: Like you sir?
Teacher: *laughs a little* no not like me, i cant really imagine myself in a dress..
me: *loud* oooh I CAN
*silence*
Ian:Mally please stop imagining him inna dress
me: *laughs* hahaha but i cant help it
Im sorry. I have a husband. His name is Nicholas He is So beautiful mmmm all mine
Yah sure my opinions may have changed.
But not the fact that I am right.
annoying person: malllly why are you being so anti-social
me: i am not antisocial. I just hate you.
me: *mummebling*
[someone tries talking to me]
me:. Hello. Conversation going on here. dont talk to me when im trying to talk to myself
..............
If it doesnt fit, force it, if it breaks.
it needed replacing anyways
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Some poems rhyme
but not mine.
Uggh. History esssay.
going okay thanks for asking.
imma just thinking of when everybody came around, it was so funny.
My moms always wondering why I have to stay up so late to do "homework". When II'm really just talking to nicholas on msn.
lol.
Anyways, i got my friends to cover for me when they came over, and just say that they also stay up to the ridicules hours of the mornining.
hatty just takes it a step too far.
lol:
mom: So how much sleep do you guys get usually?
izzy: hmm coouple of hours :)
rosie: yah same here
hatty</b: I just dont sleep
([the best part was was how casually she said it....i cant describe it. She just shrugged as was like, yah no biggie..])
<b>mom: So what time do you go to bed?
izzy: Two or three?
vag: yeah two to three thrity? sometimes four
hatty: *in all seriousness* I go to sleep at seven am.
*Silence*
me: you know hatty, theres over the top, and THEN theres you.
emailing is fun.
I woke up just now.
Its 14:02
homework to do before tuesday(that i can think of right now:
If you wish, you may disguise your hAndwRitiNg.
um..question...
Why is elftown looking very fucked today?
money cannot buy happiness It can however rent it
time is a great teacher unfortunatley it sometimes kills its pupils
dont give up
SO MUCH FUN LAST NIGHT
mally: MATT. YOU CAME (he wasnt going to come but he was here so i was happeh)
matt: yah i know, no need to rub it in
phil: no matt, if you rub it in, you'll NEVER get the stain off
izzy: mally. are you a sperm whale?
omg guys it was so much fun.
We watched ten minutes of porn.
SO not worth it.
SO worth it
So worth it.
now that was just Funny.
SO FUNNY
Eww.
Its 10:59.am.
I just woke up. People coming over in um...half an hour.
i cant be bothered moving.
Ugggh.
the bohemian Rhapsodyis an incredibly weird song.
people I need to talk to: [+]Phil [+]Izzy [+]Vag [+]Hatty [+]Matt [+]Chris (ask chris to talk to scott. blah) [+]Scott [+]Nick ([just because....no particular reason. I love him? yewp. thats good enough for me skippy. hehehe])
May your Smile shine on