fucking school
Exams in one week.
We are supposed to be having revision time.
Instead of countless essays and questions and coursework to do for homework.
I cant do all of this.
I Cant do like 17 pages of history questions, ([yes . I did say 17)
I cant do approxamatley 9 pages of Media coursework from scratch.
I cant do three questioned pages of maths standard deviation.
I cant do English coursework
I cant do Drama prep
I cant do Revision for ALL my fucking subjects
All in one week
Most of them are due for sometime soon, like tomorow onwards.
I know what i can do.
I know what i cant do.
I cant do that.
fucking school
Im really starting to freak out now. I need to do good in these motherfucking exams.
I have my reasons.
I cant fail this. OMG. how am i gonna do this. kay so like i have all my subjects to revise. and in all my subjects, i have lots of mini topics to revise. We havnt had ONE revision list, of what we actually need to know. All i know is when the exam starts.
what the fuck am i gonna do guys? I cant fucking revise for fucking Everything and fucking get my fucking shit in for the fucking deadlines. And i know no matter how many times i say "fucking" its not gonna fucking help me. Fuck.
I dont know any of this. its gonna be a long night.
English coursework
The fictional character of scrooge has been composed by Dickens to contain all the evils and corruption of the society that he grew up in. There is a clear contrast between scrooge at the beginning of the novel and at the end. He begins as an outright villain, very bitter and cold, and progresses into the ‘saviour of Christmas’. As this era was during the industrial revolution, there was a sudden rise in the population, and a class divide. There were not only the upper and lower class, but there was then a middle class because wealth and status was becoming a major issue in the times. By creating the stimulating the storyline, Dickens ventures into the different attitudes of the stereotypical snobbish and rich, and places all of these attributes into one character – scrooge. He challenges the idea of discrimination against the poor by taking scrooge through a journey of self-discovery
Much of Dickens troubled and difficult childhood is reflected in his works, his father was imprisoned and he was forced to work in a factory with a poor rate of pay and extremely poor working conditions. I think that as dickens was a lower class member, he observed the attitudes of the rich towards them and experienced the discrimination
At the beginning of the novel readers realise the isolated relationship that scrooge had with his business partner Marley. Dickens emphasises the solitude in this relationship by saying ‘Scrooge was his sole executioner, his sole friend, his sole mourner’ which suggests the loneliness in their relationship. Scrooge seemed to be the only person for Marley and Marley seemed to be the only ‘sole’ friend for Scrooge. After Marley’s death, Scrooge didn’t paint out his name on the building of their work place, as the price of the paint was too expensive. I think this is showing Scrooges hidden insecurities, as well as his stingy and cruel approach to money. Although he claims to not have changed it due to it being a waste of money, I think he wants to keep Marley’s name there for comfort, as he seemed to be a very dear friend to him. Readers can see there is a different side to Scrooge, which slowly begins to shine through after the visits from the ghosts.
Scrooge is portrayed as an extremely vindictive, bitter and merciless man. His attitude towards his employee Bob Cratchit is one of the main storylines, which unwinds throughout the story. Scrooge seems very firm and strict when dealing with matters at work. His approach to his workers is of a very unfriendly manor. He does not permit leave of work for Christmas, which was greatly valued by Cratchit. His nephew plays a widely contrasting character that sometimes I feel that Scrooge finds difficult to deal with. After the visit from the ghost of the Christmas past, I think the reader begins to realise that Scrooge is most afraid of his nephew because it reminds him of himself as a child. His nephew however, despite Scrooge’s constant bitterness maintains a constant happy atmosphere and refuses to talk bad of his uncle. Scrooge’s attitude towards the charity workers that visit during his work hours is very dismissive and inconsiderate.
Pathetic Fallacy is used throughout the novel to build up a cold and sinister atmosphere through Dickens’s description of the streets and offices where the story is set. We get an idea that it is ‘cold, bleak biting weather: foggy withal’ and that the candles are ‘flaring’ in the office windows like ‘ruddy smears upon the palpable brown air’. The use of figurative language and personificatio
As scrooge begins to experience each one of the spirits, the readers are slowly revealed the inner Scrooge that seemed repressed in this vindictive man. At first when the ghost of Jacob Marley visits, Scrooges attitude towards this seems very carefree although we can see he is threatened by the presence of the ghost. His opinions about ghosts and such is very limited when Marley says “You don’t believe in me do you” Scrooge replies “No, I don’t”. His direct approach instantly shows that he is not phased by this yet is questioning himself and his senses. He uses his intellect to reason with the ghost, how ever it is fairly evident that he was trying to distract his own attention and terror. He is told by Marley that ‘charity, mercy, forbearance and benevolence’ should have been his buissness. Jacob says that you need to be good on earth or be forever doomed to walk the earth. This connects with the social themes o f the novel, of both financial and spiritual generosity. The coming of Marley;s ghost is more about financial generosity as he is warning Scrooge that if he is not in the good he will be doomed to forever remain on earth, neve
r happy.
The ghost of the Christmas past arrives and Scrooge witnesses Old Fezziwig and the happiness he gave to his employees. I think this made him realise that he had a responsibility to do to the same. He also comes to terms with the fact that he had sacrificed love for money, which he regrets. I think the visiting of this ghost, triggers of many memories from the past that Scrooge has cast aside in his greed and lust for money. I realises what a loss he had made yet is still to highly strung with pride to admit it.
The ghost of the Christmas Present holds the vision of Cratchit family. He realises he is partially responsible for their well being. He begins to express some concern for Tiny Tim.
After visiting Fred’s party he begins to ponder about the value of family and having fun. I think Scrooge masterbates too much. He needs a girlfriend and he needs one now. I think He needs to die soon.
fuck this
Its So cute.
I call my friend Tom ----"man"
And he Calls me ---- "Laydee"
its like Hey man
Hey ladyee
Its kewl because i sound very good saying man.
He sounds stupid.
But i still love him :O
Cya man
now lets take a glimpse into teh mind of mally... "--------------------------- -------------- -------------- ----" And there you have it ladies and gentlemen. That was the glimpse into the Mind of mally. Thanks. come again...
In a man eyes Love will last until he dies In truth's eyes Love will last one lies In god's eyes Love will last until love dies In my eyes Love will never lie Love will never say goodbye Becase in my eyes Love will never die
Some Books Worth Your Sight
Amnesia - Andrew Neiderman Fire bringer - David Clement Davies Princess Diaries - Meg Cabot Sickened - Julia Gregory One child - Torey Hayden The da vinci code - Dan Brown The kiss - Danielle Steel The house on hope street - Danielle Steel Sense and sensability - Jane Austin The killers cousin - Nancy Werlin Northern lights -Phillip Pullman All the shopaholic series - Sophie Kinsella Holy cow - Sarah Macdonald The gathering light - Jennifer Donnelly Tom sawyer - Mark Twain Little women - Louisa M. Alcott The secret garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett The series of unfortunate events - Lemony snicket Legally Blonde (the actual novel :O) - Amanda Brown
Some Movies worth your sight
Gone with the wind - Written by Margret Mitchell. Directed By Victor Flemming.
Army of the Twelve MonkeysDirected By Terry Gilliam
ThirteenDirected By Nikki Reed Gotta be one of the best
HalloweenCome on guys. This is Halloween we're talking about.
You've got mail<i>I cant help it
Rush hour 1 and twoWhat is it good for..absolutle
Speed (number one)YESSS
The matrixThe legend
The ringScary but meh
The exorsistWell come on...
The shinningyewwp heres Jonny
American Pielmao
Freaky Fridayomg im sucha girl. but still. I LOVED IT SO MUCH
The cinderella storyhaha. meh. i liked it.
The giftbeautiful
Scent of a womenokay people. you need to see this
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragonwhat can i say
Anything with subtitlesIf i can read it - i'll watch it
Miss congenialityoh yes. girl power
Legally Blonde..uh huh
sawhmm nothing too great but still
more latertoodles
Impossible = Im Possible
MATT AND I'S COMMENTS TO THE SONG "BEAUTIFUL" BY CHRISTINA AGUL*cant spell*. we both agree that the songs cute, but we dont really like >.her.<. Enjoy
Don’t look at me
[okay sure. but why the fuck did you bring out a video to be publiciised on television yet not want people to "look at you"]
every day is so wonderful
[oh yeah?]
And suddenly, it’s hard to breathe
[die bitch. choke bitch.]
Now and then, I get insecure
[slit...your...wrists...]
From all the fame, I’m so ashamed
[Me too hunny. go hide in a corner some where dark]
I am beautiful no matter what they say
[they say alot]
Words can’t bring me down
[no I think they can sweetie]
I am beautiful in every single way
[name one]
Yes, words can’t bring me down
[what about a knife?]
So don’t you bring me down today
[How about tomorow?]
To all your friends
[you have friends?]
you’re delirious
[wow can you say that word?]
So consumed in all your doom
[if you want to die, nothing's stopping you]
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
[*from matt* masterbate. or get a cock.]
The piece is gone and the puzzle undone
[*from matt*undo your clothes]
That’s the way it is
[no really. its not]
*chorus*
No matter what we do
[really? it doesnt matter? really really? anything? wow. really?]
No matter what they say
[die biatttch]
When the sun is shining through
Then the clouds won’t stay
[*from matt* my cock will]
And everywhere we go
[You go chrissy, we'll just stay right here]
The sun won’t always shine
[maybe check the forecast before going "everywhere" you go]
But tomorrow will find a way
[huah? wtf?]
All the other times
[yeah, that doesnt make sense]
We are beautiful no matter what they say
[yeah, we are, but your not]
Yes, words won’t bring us down
[I think they can]
We are beautiful no matter what they say
[yewp, we are sooo beautiful. wtf are you]
Yes, words can’t bring us down
[this is getting kinda repetative eh?]
Don’t you bring me down today
[oh jebuuuus]
Don’t you bring me down today
[wow one more time?]
Don’t you bring me down today
[and AGAIN incase we can hear?]
Funny day today...
[me talking about my dad....the whole time thinking of good words to use]
me: uuugh I really dislike him, i mean, he has NO right to talk to me...he didnt raise me, he didnt concieve me *realises* uh, wait, shit he did, anyway, he didnt concept me *realises* wtf, um, he didnt...what the fuck is the word that means love me?....?
vag: love me?
me: exactly. HE DIDNT LOVE ME.
[matt and i talking in media about christina agularrriaaa however the hell you spell her name anyways]
me: maaaattt
*matt turns around in really sexual way*
matt: hmmm yesss *licks lips*
me: ew matt dont look at me like that
matt: hahaha like that christina agulara song, you know, when she's like "dont look at me"
me: omg yess. hey matt *SEXY christina agulara voice from the song....* dont look at me
matt: okay *Turns around*
me: MATT lol. *throws book*
[OMG
]
for once i was not kept behind in chemistry. I repeat- I Was Not Held Back in Chemistry.
It was the end of class and i was just waiting for him to tell me to stay back. As fucking usual. but my gosh ....HE DIDNT. I almost had a heart attack as i scurried out of the classroom incase he changed his mind.
Matt was like.
[mally. Do you realise that you just got out of class without being told to stay behind?]
and im like, in a really cool voice
"yeah dude, i know"
[MALLY DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING RARE THAT IS]
*Scared face*.
I tried hard this lesson actually.
Apart from the fact that i got TO lesson like 15 minutes late lol :P
BUT that was because nobody told us we were in the computer room.
fuck them
its their fault.
And when I got TO class, i just got on with my work.
I only Really talked to Matt.
But i ignored him msot of the time.
I think he feels neglected.
Im so proud of myself
standard deviation
kay on the topic of this whole confidence thing which i keep talking about....
I realised that :
if your confident as a person, you can pull of almost anything. Even if you have no ideea what your doing
I <3 you
it made a lot of sense to me
Ryan and I are....: Smokey and shorty
Im sorry. I have a husband. His name is Nicholas He is So beautiful mmmm all mine
Really sleepy...
gah.
-Got to school (extreamly cold).
- On the bus I was just huddled up in the corner, and i managed to fumble my Cd player out. no batteries.
-Ian offered to stay inside with me while the other lunatics waited outside in the coldness. that was nice of him seen as I did poison him just yesterday.
-Drama. Aragh. Our next assessment is a two minute long monologue.
not good
*_*Hehe piano went pretty well actually *_*
*_*I played one of my peices really well... *_*
*_* my piano teacher asked me to play at a concert this may*_*
*_* oh my gosh*_*
*_*I am a pianist *_*
*_*Love me *_*
*_* So much*_*
*_* Its cold in this house.*_*
*_* Where is the goddamned heating*_*
*_* This is england you know.*_*
*_* ugg. whats going on with this world. Anyway. Vag called.*_*
*_* Phil picked me up today. He sorta dislocated my ribs. ouch*_*
*_* Matt is so funny. he makes me giggle.*_*
*_* Religious education was so kewl. I poisoned Ians eyes with ink from his fountain pen.*_*
*_*He swore he would NEVER give me a fountain pen again. *_*
*_*Haha. we'll see about that *_*
*_*Exams in two weeks. uh oh speggetio.*_*
*_*How come i dont know these things ever? *_*
*_* EVER?*_*
Spoke to David today. After a long time.
I simply said to him.
"David I am not going to continue i g n o r i n g you or disliking you, because quite frankly its a waste of my time and my energy. However, I what you did was low, Infact it was past low, but now its in the past. I dont know what you must have possibly got out of it. If it made you feel more important, involved or just good about yourself. It definatly didnt make me feel any of those things. But you know what?I hope that you felt like it was worth it."
He just said : "Im sorry Mally, but you cant go on like this.."
To which I replied.
["Trust me. I can. But I wont because you're right, its not worth it. Especially You. I can forgive you, but i cant forget it. Bye]
*And then i walked away*
I was so proud of myself. I didnt totally loose it. I didnt shout or [s. c . r . e. a. m]. I said eactly what i needed to say, and then left it.
Its just that I realised that theres no use constantly fighting. For what? Anyway? What do I really get out of making ascene? Sure, some attention maybe, and maybe i can realease some anger, but im just releasing it into another form. If i just let it go, accept it, and get on with my life, all the hurt or anger, or whatever i do, or did feel in me, can totally go. Instead of just being transfered or kept inside me.
I dont need attention.
I dont need to make a scene.
Although he pisses the Shit out of me. He was right. What is screaming about it really gonna do anyway? Nothing.
My point exactly
I hope things are okay
[In Religious education today, we were talking about prejudice against gays....because we do that sometimes O_O]
Teacher: Generally Gay men are more prejudiced against that gay women....
me: *super loud* YAH BUT GAY WOMEN ARE HAWT.
*everyone stares at me*
me: Im not a lesbian. Honestly.
[Kay this one we're talking about transvestites...I love R.E]
Teacher: So just imagine if one of your male teachers came to school in a dress...
me: Like you sir?
Teacher: *laughs a little* no not like me, i cant really imagine myself in a dress..
me: *loud* oooh I CAN
*silence*
Ian:Mally please stop imagining him inna dress
me: *laughs* hahaha but i cant help it
Im sorry. I have a husband. His name is Nicholas He is So beautiful mmmm all mine
Yah sure my opinions may have changed.
But not the fact that I am right.
annoying person: malllly why are you being so anti-social
me: i am not antisocial. I just hate you.
me: *mummebling*
[someone tries talking to me]
me:. Hello. Conversation going on here. dont talk to me when im trying to talk to myself
..............
If it doesnt fit, force it, if it breaks.
it needed replacing anyways
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Some poems rhyme
but not mine.
Uggh. History esssay.
going okay thanks for asking.
imma just thinking of when everybody came around, it was so funny.
My moms always wondering why I have to stay up so late to do "homework". When II'm really just talking to nicholas on msn.
lol.
Anyways, i got my friends to cover for me when they came over, and just say that they also stay up to the ridicules hours of the mornining.
hatty just takes it a step too far.
lol:
mom: So how much sleep do you guys get usually?
izzy: hmm coouple of hours :)
rosie: yah same here
hatty</b: I just dont sleep
([the best part was was how casually she said it....i cant describe it. She just shrugged as was like, yah no biggie..])
<b>mom: So what time do you go to bed?
izzy: Two or three?
vag: yeah two to three thrity? sometimes four
hatty: *in all seriousness* I go to sleep at seven am.
*Silence*
me: you know hatty, theres over the top, and THEN theres you.
emailing is fun.