[choke_on_dreams]'s diary
Love Love is not about lovingthe perfect person. Its about loving the imprerfect person perfectly. Its not about what he/she has to offer to you. Everything they can give you. Its about what you will accept. And what you will give in return. Love is about understanding. Love their body Love their mind Love their dreams Love their thoughts Love their smile Love their tears Just love them for who they are and nobody else beacuse thats all they can be. Respect them. Love is about...
omg funny day...
After school I met this boy. Well guy. whatever. it was male. And he was like 16 years old I think
His name Is Eric
Eric is an exchange student from panama.
So we started talking and hes really cool. He said to me
"Can I please take a picture of you?"
[Which was a little weird. admittedly]. But i was like okay.
*click* lol.
So he now has a picture of me. haha. that was weird though. How often do you get like a foreign exchange student ask for your picture. I felt like a celebrity.
He said when he'de been around school hes always wanted to talk to me but never got the chance. aw lol ;p haha.
So i was like "[kewlnesssss]". And Then I said ;
well i have to get my bus, Il talk to you tomororow?
and he said
[I cant Im leaving back for Panama today, its my last day here, its a shame i didnt get to know you sooner ;( do you please have address, so i can write to you?]
lol :S *blink*
He ment like an email address. He even got a pen and Paper out for me. haha.
:P
Well.
That was an interesting day.
Cutest thing... By my little brother. For homework he was asked to write a few diary enteries describing his saddest day evar.
Before you read. Do Take note that all of this happened in a series of 3 consequtive days.
[Nothing has been edited. all in his spelling etc. My brother is 10 years old]
December 23rd
dear diary
Today was the sadest day of my LIFE.[oh no. lets have a communal weep] It was my dads funeral.[see this is what goes on in the mind of my brother. this is how much we love our daddy] I cried like a baby on my mothers shoulder.[lol dewd. you are a baby] Mum wasnt crying yet but i knew she was just holding it in. My dad died when he was coming back from work in his car when Smash![hey nice literary technique] A drunken driver rammed his car in the water and that was where he drowned to death.[oh so graphic. thanks] Just beforre the service started mum ran outside. A few moments later she came back with a hanker cheif [lol. hanker cheif] and started drying her eyes. What could possibly get worse? [well....]
December 24th
Dear diary
Today was ok but it could of been better.[you think? Your father died yesterday] Mum was in her room praying as usual [three words: what the fuck?]while I was quietly watching Tv.[oh so quietly] Mum come to me and softly said "Do you mind if you dont have any food today" [OMFG LOL YEWP]I replied yes. I knew what was happening. [mom was on Speed?] Before mom didnt have a job so dad got all the money. [DADS DEAD ] Mum was loosing money fast.[nice..]
December 25th
dear diary
I was invited to a christmas party with my friends [what friends?] and I went.[I bet they loved that] But when i got back I gave my mom a loaf of bread [a loaf of BREAD? who the hell are you, jesus christ?]that i stole from mmy friend [you STOLE a loaf of BREAD from your FRIEND?] because i knew what mum was going through.[bread berievement] It was sad to see what she does to get through life. I was stealing for a week now but at least i got something to eat. [what? like bread?]When i gave mum the haf [haf lo] she asked where i got it from and i replied that i bought it [yes. because mom was loosing money "fast"]. But there was some good news after all. [OH REALLY? what could possibly get better than FREE BREAD] Mom met this man on the street.[*blink* its been what two days? a man..on the street] Mom sounded like she really liked this man on then street [does this man have a name or is he just the man on the street?] and his name was Jack. [oh there we go...]
december 26th
dear diary
Today was the hapiest day of my life.[four days later and...tada....] My mom was marrying Jack [*blink*] and we wouldnt ever be poor agaain[yay. all my worries are gone. free bread maybe?]. All my troubles were over .[haha there we go] no more stealing.[bread....] I think jack will be a great dad [wtf? hes marrying your mother a few days after your FATHER died and suddenly what...hes gonna adopt you?] but I still cant thinking about my real dad who is still in heaven somewhere ["heaven somewhere"]. And I could see in m mums eyes that she hasnt forgot about him either. [but shes marrying jack, the guy from the street like 4 days after your father died from a raging alcoholic, fell into a river where he drowned to death, forcing you to live in starvation, with nothing but a load of bread every day that you stole from your "Friends". life is beautiful]
Just for you David.
David: Malllllly….Do you have your R.E book?
Mally: No I don’t…. I forgot it
David: hm okay. Mallllly do you have your Spanish Books?
Mally: No I don’t
*Silence*
david: Malllly? Do you have your bag?
Mally: Probably not
David: Have you seen Daddy Day Care?
Ian: No
David: ok. have you seen the part where the girls like...
Ian: DAVE. I HAVNT SEEN IT.
*Watching "Mississippi Burning " in Re*
Mally Hey he looks like Tom hanks.....and toby Maguire
Ian: What a crossbred?
*lots and lots of laughing because Ian is just so funny*
David: Hey mally, you look like...
mally: who who who?
david<?b>: that guy...
*Siilence*
<b>mally: Guy?
david: Off CBBC. Cbeebies. The tweenies? YES thats it.
(For those who do not knnow - the tweenies are creature liek things)
Ian: Dave but their like colourfull, bright pink creature things.
david: Yeah so?
Ian: How kind, Mally, dave thinks you look like a TWEENIE!
mally: yay *unenthusiasti
David: OH WAIT.. wrong one. I meant the teletubbies. LALA? no wait. PO.
Ian: lmao. the red one?
David: Yeah i think so
Mally: David will you please go suck your cock someplace else?
.Xx -+Sweet Dreams+- xX. x...May The Angels Be Watching You While You Sleep...x x...Think Of Me Because I Will Be Thinking Of You...x x...I love you...x
Kay. The time is 12:30 people and i really cant be bothered staying up tonight. Im not tired i just. i dont know. i cant even explain. this just seems so pointless.
didnt get much work done today. not much at all.
Chris helped me with history. Ive done as much as I can. so thats okay.
English is in for friday so I can do that on thursday Night.
Gotta really thinka bout media though.
hmmph.
But anyway.
Called Nicholas today.
XD
He is So beautiful.
Vag called today
:O Im so popular.
I like totally didnt speak to phill much today. only a little. he gave me a hug :P haha. but that was it. I think he feels neglected.
vAG AND Matt are going out. WHICH I AM HAPPY FOR. i just feel like i have to be less close with Matt, i mean, its only fair.I love them both. And like, i think we need to back off a little anyways.
I think.
Tomorow is Tuesday.
Ugh.
History english maths science spanish Re.
Ugh.
History NO
English NO
Maths NO
Science NO
Spanish NOOOO
Re. OKAY. :0
ugh my birthday in....
[10 days]
Not that im counting.
Im way to kewl for that.
oh man. another year has just gone by so quickly. Urgh
oh my gawd. This is hawtness at its finest. At its hawtest. Im marrying this man. *aaaah* *ooooh* *aaah* I love you Nicholas.
fucking school
Exams in one week.
We are supposed to be having revision time.
Instead of countless essays and questions and coursework to do for homework.
I cant do all of this.
I Cant do like 17 pages of history questions, ([yes . I did say 17)
I cant do approxamatley 9 pages of Media coursework from scratch.
I cant do three questioned pages of maths standard deviation.
I cant do English coursework
I cant do Drama prep
I cant do Revision for ALL my fucking subjects
All in one week
Most of them are due for sometime soon, like tomorow onwards.
I know what i can do.
I know what i cant do.
I cant do that.
fucking school
Im really starting to freak out now. I need to do good in these motherfucking exams.
I have my reasons.
I cant fail this. OMG. how am i gonna do this. kay so like i have all my subjects to revise. and in all my subjects, i have lots of mini topics to revise. We havnt had ONE revision list, of what we actually need to know. All i know is when the exam starts.
what the fuck am i gonna do guys? I cant fucking revise for fucking Everything and fucking get my fucking shit in for the fucking deadlines. And i know no matter how many times i say "fucking" its not gonna fucking help me. Fuck.
I dont know any of this. its gonna be a long night.
English coursework
The fictional character of scrooge has been composed by Dickens to contain all the evils and corruption of the society that he grew up in. There is a clear contrast between scrooge at the beginning of the novel and at the end. He begins as an outright villain, very bitter and cold, and progresses into the ‘saviour of Christmas’. As this era was during the industrial revolution, there was a sudden rise in the population, and a class divide. There were not only the upper and lower class, but there was then a middle class because wealth and status was becoming a major issue in the times. By creating the stimulating the storyline, Dickens ventures into the different attitudes of the stereotypical snobbish and rich, and places all of these attributes into one character – scrooge. He challenges the idea of discrimination against the poor by taking scrooge through a journey of self-discovery
Much of Dickens troubled and difficult childhood is reflected in his works, his father was imprisoned and he was forced to work in a factory with a poor rate of pay and extremely poor working conditions. I think that as dickens was a lower class member, he observed the attitudes of the rich towards them and experienced the discrimination
At the beginning of the novel readers realise the isolated relationship that scrooge had with his business partner Marley. Dickens emphasises the solitude in this relationship by saying ‘Scrooge was his sole executioner, his sole friend, his sole mourner’ which suggests the loneliness in their relationship. Scrooge seemed to be the only person for Marley and Marley seemed to be the only ‘sole’ friend for Scrooge. After Marley’s death, Scrooge didn’t paint out his name on the building of their work place, as the price of the paint was too expensive. I think this is showing Scrooges hidden insecurities, as well as his stingy and cruel approach to money. Although he claims to not have changed it due to it being a waste of money, I think he wants to keep Marley’s name there for comfort, as he seemed to be a very dear friend to him. Readers can see there is a different side to Scrooge, which slowly begins to shine through after the visits from the ghosts.
Scrooge is portrayed as an extremely vindictive, bitter and merciless man. His attitude towards his employee Bob Cratchit is one of the main storylines, which unwinds throughout the story. Scrooge seems very firm and strict when dealing with matters at work. His approach to his workers is of a very unfriendly manor. He does not permit leave of work for Christmas, which was greatly valued by Cratchit. His nephew plays a widely contrasting character that sometimes I feel that Scrooge finds difficult to deal with. After the visit from the ghost of the Christmas past, I think the reader begins to realise that Scrooge is most afraid of his nephew because it reminds him of himself as a child. His nephew however, despite Scrooge’s constant bitterness maintains a constant happy atmosphere and refuses to talk bad of his uncle. Scrooge’s attitude towards the charity workers that visit during his work hours is very dismissive and inconsiderate.
Pathetic Fallacy is used throughout the novel to build up a cold and sinister atmosphere through Dickens’s description of the streets and offices where the story is set. We get an idea that it is ‘cold, bleak biting weather: foggy withal’ and that the candles are ‘flaring’ in the office windows like ‘ruddy smears upon the palpable brown air’. The use of figurative language and personificatio
As scrooge begins to experience each one of the spirits, the readers are slowly revealed the inner Scrooge that seemed repressed in this vindictive man. At first when the ghost of Jacob Marley visits, Scrooges attitude towards this seems very carefree although we can see he is threatened by the presence of the ghost. His opinions about ghosts and such is very limited when Marley says “You don’t believe in me do you” Scrooge replies “No, I don’t”. His direct approach instantly shows that he is not phased by this yet is questioning himself and his senses. He uses his intellect to reason with the ghost, how ever it is fairly evident that he was trying to distract his own attention and terror. He is told by Marley that ‘charity, mercy, forbearance and benevolence’ should have been his buissness. Jacob says that you need to be good on earth or be forever doomed to walk the earth. This connects with the social themes o f the novel, of both financial and spiritual generosity. The coming of Marley;s ghost is more about financial generosity as he is warning Scrooge that if he is not in the good he will be doomed to forever remain on earth, neve
r happy.
The ghost of the Christmas past arrives and Scrooge witnesses Old Fezziwig and the happiness he gave to his employees. I think this made him realise that he had a responsibility to do to the same. He also comes to terms with the fact that he had sacrificed love for money, which he regrets. I think the visiting of this ghost, triggers of many memories from the past that Scrooge has cast aside in his greed and lust for money. I realises what a loss he had made yet is still to highly strung with pride to admit it.
The ghost of the Christmas Present holds the vision of Cratchit family. He realises he is partially responsible for their well being. He begins to express some concern for Tiny Tim.
After visiting Fred’s party he begins to ponder about the value of family and having fun. I think Scrooge masterbates too much. He needs a girlfriend and he needs one now. I think He needs to die soon.
fuck this
Its So cute.
I call my friend Tom ----"man"
And he Calls me ---- "Laydee"
its like Hey man
Hey ladyee
Its kewl because i sound very good saying man.
He sounds stupid.
But i still love him :O
Cya man
now lets take a glimpse into teh mind of mally... "--------------------------- -------------- -------------- ----" And there you have it ladies and gentlemen. That was the glimpse into the Mind of mally. Thanks. come again...
In a man eyes Love will last until he dies In truth's eyes Love will last one lies In god's eyes Love will last until love dies In my eyes Love will never lie Love will never say goodbye Becase in my eyes Love will never die
nick: Your like a bad video game
Sometimes I forget his name
I never even hear his voice
But I doubt he’s looking for fame
The boy at the back of the class
He seems to always be there
Just an invisible presence
to confirm with his stare
The boy at the back of the class
To him I do not speak
They call him all these horrid names
They even call him a freak
The boy at the back of the class
Sometimes I find myself gaze
I do not like him, not at all
But somehow he has his ways
The boy at the back of the class
I think I’m starting to like
In all the differences that we share
Our minds just seem so alike
The boy at the back of the class
He looked at me today
He smiled his sweet fumbled smile
I didn’t know what to say
The boy at the back of the class
I ‘m going to talk to him today
I breathe in deeply and march to school
I know just what to say
The boy at the back of the class
I’m so in love with you
For the past few years we’ve shared
I know that this is true
The boy at the back of the class
I want to tell you this
That I don’t care, they can call me a freak
I would die for just one kiss
The boy at the back of the class
Yes this is what I’ll say
I walk into the class room
And fear slowly melts away
The boy at the back of the class
I scan the room whole
Where is this boy, I need him now
To confess my heart and soul
The boy at the back of class
He isn’t sitting there
His musky sent and his lavishing eyes
There’s only an empty chair
The boy at the back of the class
I hear the classroom mutter
I hear his name being whispered
Amongst all the clutter
The boy at the back of the class
Was found dead today
In his room all alone
With a note that would say
To the girl at the front of the class
I will love you till I die
I guess this means until today
But I wanted to say goodbye
To the girl at the front of the class
I watched you each day
You didn’t even notice me
How many times I tried to say
To the girl at the front of the class
I loved you more than you knew
I hope that now, you might know
But I guess its now through
To the girl at the front of the class
I never told a lie
I never even said hello
But this is my goodbye
Some Books Worth Your Sight
Amnesia - Andrew Neiderman Fire bringer - David Clement Davies Princess Diaries - Meg Cabot Sickened - Julia Gregory One child - Torey Hayden The da vinci code - Dan Brown The kiss - Danielle Steel The house on hope street - Danielle Steel Sense and sensability - Jane Austin The killers cousin - Nancy Werlin Northern lights -Phillip Pullman All the shopaholic series - Sophie Kinsella Holy cow - Sarah Macdonald The gathering light - Jennifer Donnelly Tom sawyer - Mark Twain Little women - Louisa M. Alcott The secret garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett The series of unfortunate events - Lemony snicket Legally Blonde (the actual novel :O) - Amanda Brown
Some Movies worth your sight
Gone with the wind - Written by Margret Mitchell. Directed By Victor Flemming.
Amazing. Old stuff but nothing beats the Old stuff. *Aaah* I love this movie, really long but ive seen it maybe
8 times?
Army of the Twelve MonkeysDirected By Terry Gilliam
Definatly a hawt movie....
ThirteenDirected By Nikki Reed Gotta be one of the best
HalloweenCome on guys. This is Halloween we're talking about.
You've got mail<i>I cant help it
Rush hour 1 and twoWhat is it good for..absolutle
Speed (number one)YESSS
The matrixThe legend
The ringScary but meh
The exorsistWell come on...
The shinningyewwp heres Jonny
American Pielmao
Freaky Fridayomg im sucha girl. but still. I LOVED IT SO MUCH
The cinderella storyhaha. meh. i liked it.
The giftbeautiful
Scent of a womenokay people. you need to see this
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragonwhat can i say
Anything with subtitlesIf i can read it - i'll watch it
Miss congenialityoh yes. girl power
Legally Blonde..uh huh
sawhmm nothing too great but still
more latertoodles
Impossible = Im Possible
MATT AND I'S COMMENTS TO THE SONG "BEAUTIFUL" BY CHRISTINA AGUL*cant spell*. we both agree that the songs cute, but we dont really like >.her.<. Enjoy
Don’t look at me
[okay sure. but why the fuck did you bring out a video to be publiciised on television yet not want people to "look at you"]
every day is so wonderful
[oh yeah?]
And suddenly, it’s hard to breathe
[die bitch. choke bitch.]
Now and then, I get insecure
[slit...your...wrists...]
From all the fame, I’m so ashamed
[Me too hunny. go hide in a corner some where dark]
I am beautiful no matter what they say
[they say alot]
Words can’t bring me down
[no I think they can sweetie]
I am beautiful in every single way
[name one]
Yes, words can’t bring me down
[what about a knife?]
So don’t you bring me down today
[How about tomorow?]
To all your friends
[you have friends?]
you’re delirious
[wow can you say that word?]
So consumed in all your doom
[if you want to die, nothing's stopping you]
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
[*from matt* masterbate. or get a cock.]
The piece is gone and the puzzle undone
[*from matt*undo your clothes]
That’s the way it is
[no really. its not]
*chorus*
No matter what we do
[really? it doesnt matter? really really? anything? wow. really?]
No matter what they say
[die biatttch]
When the sun is shining through
Then the clouds won’t stay
[*from matt* my cock will]
And everywhere we go
[You go chrissy, we'll just stay right here]
The sun won’t always shine
[maybe check the forecast before going "everywhere" you go]
But tomorrow will find a way
[huah? wtf?]
All the other times
[yeah, that doesnt make sense]
We are beautiful no matter what they say
[yeah, we are, but your not]
Yes, words won’t bring us down
[I think they can]
We are beautiful no matter what they say
[yewp, we are sooo beautiful. wtf are you]
Yes, words can’t bring us down
[this is getting kinda repetative eh?]
Don’t you bring me down today
[oh jebuuuus]
Don’t you bring me down today
[wow one more time?]
Don’t you bring me down today
[and AGAIN incase we can hear?]
Funny day today...
[me talking about my dad....the whole time thinking of good words to use]
me: uuugh I really dislike him, i mean, he has NO right to talk to me...he didnt raise me, he didnt concieve me *realises* uh, wait, shit he did, anyway, he didnt concept me *realises* wtf, um, he didnt...what the fuck is the word that means love me?....?
vag: love me?
me: exactly. HE DIDNT LOVE ME.
[matt and i talking in media about christina agularrriaaa however the hell you spell her name anyways]
me: maaaattt
*matt turns around in really sexual way*
matt: hmmm yesss *licks lips*
me: ew matt dont look at me like that
matt: hahaha like that christina agulara song, you know, when she's like "dont look at me"
me: omg yess. hey matt *SEXY christina agulara voice from the song....* dont look at me
matt: okay *Turns around*
me: MATT lol. *throws book*
[OMG
]
for once i was not kept behind in chemistry. I repeat- I Was Not Held Back in Chemistry.
It was the end of class and i was just waiting for him to tell me to stay back. As fucking usual. but my gosh ....HE DIDNT. I almost had a heart attack as i scurried out of the classroom incase he changed his mind.
Matt was like.
[mally. Do you realise that you just got out of class without being told to stay behind?]
and im like, in a really cool voice
"yeah dude, i know"
[MALLY DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING RARE THAT IS]
*Scared face*.
I tried hard this lesson actually.
Apart from the fact that i got TO lesson like 15 minutes late lol :P
BUT that was because nobody told us we were in the computer room.
fuck them
its their fault.
And when I got TO class, i just got on with my work.
I only Really talked to Matt.
But i ignored him msot of the time.
I think he feels neglected.
Im so proud of myself
however in physics...
BLAH
I DONT CARE ANYMORE
I had fun.
Greg is actually alright when you get to know him.
Well, He is still a dick head. But i can live with that. kinda sorta.
He does have a small penis.
He does recon he is ["DA BEST YO"].
hes not.
But a guy Can dream.
omg: confidence update :::::I felt pretty confident and good about myself today::::::omg.
Mr. Brown is an asshole.
But joe ball is funneh.
Was with Ben and Ian in maths.
IAN is a fucking calculater.
ben and I however, realised we outstupid ourselve sin many occasions.
we did shit on
standard deviation
WTF?
no questions asked , none answered.
finally they got non healthy food back in the cafeteria.
finally.
History is a jackass.
Especially with HIM.
he tries to hard.
Harriet complains that, even though im the smallest person i take up the most room Evar.
Which is not true
I am compact
I am a miniature c o l l e c t a b l e.
Ask nicholas. He's *collected* me alreadys.
Yah so, she keeps freaking out and pushing me over the other end of the desk because im "[taking up too much room]"
fuck her :P
And i was writing real neat.
and she pushed me
and screwed up my neat handwriting.
SO I ripped her book.
lol. well
No. not really.
I just scribbled on it real bad.
She let out this like, giant wail. And everyone waws like Wtf.
I was like. "hatty wtf are you DOING"
kay on the topic of this whole confidence thing which i keep talking about....
I realised that :
if your confident as a person, you can pull of almost anything. Even if you have no ideea what your doing
And its true isnt it?
I mean. IF you believe in yourself, you just have to keep going and people iwll still think whatever your doing was amazing or what ever because you did it so well.
hmmph.
gotta work on that
I <3 you
hmm Today. well. woke up, you know, the usual.
missed the bus.
uugh. it was freezing.
Ian told me today that to be confident you have to b e l i e v e you can be confident first. He says thats a form of confidence in itself.
it made a lot of sense to me
Just sometimes difficult to put it into practice you know?
Ian is my buddy.
Anyway. tom is an ass. but he makes me laugh nonetheless.
uggh our school is going on some "healthy eating" thing and THERE WAS NO CHIPS. oh man. All i had was some pizza. and some jaffa cakes to compensate.
But it had to be done. I guess.
Ryan and I are....: Smokey and shorty
taaadaaaa
brilliant.
excellent
fantabulastic baby
something interesting.
Pretty Amazing I think.
Well, there's this year seven class in our school.
They line up by the school building every day.
Their form tutor is Mrs grant.
Mrs grant was my PE. teacher. I love her lots. Shes really cool but scary as shit. no seriously. shes so loud for a cute blonde person :P lol. shes just really strict but at the same time a good friend. ugh cant explain. but anyways. somehow she has managed to craft her rowdy year 7 form into like fucking robots.
They line up in single file.
They dont talk
They dont move
They probably dont even breathe.
They just stand there and wait.
And she walks past the window. raises her eyebrow.
and then...
one by one, they follow. still maintaining the single filed line, and the non speaking/breat
They walk straight up the stairs along the right, all holding the railings and then into their class.
Its fucking amazing.
I just cant understand. I just watch them thinking. omfg.
She's been giving them something. im sure.
Anyway, im talking to my form tutor Miss Hobbs and I was just explaining the weirdness of the situation. I was like " we were never like that!!"
and she was like "oh I knnow"
and im like sniggering and say "hah. must be the teaching then"
She looked at me with her mouth slightly open and said "malavika! excuse me"
haha. she loves me really.
OMFG.
I tried really hard not to talk today in chemistry.
No but I DID.
And then the ONE time i said something stupid about Richard "flexing" his "muscles" the motherfucker dr. Koritsas heard me. THE ONE TIME. uugh. anyway.
He was like at the end of the lesson, pointing out the students that could leave the class, and kept me and some other people behind. I was like wtf.
uggh. I HATE CHEMISTRY.
so much.
Im sorry. I have a husband. His name is Nicholas He is So beautiful mmmm all mine