kay I woke up some time ago, and i just ate a um two croissants :)

Im listening to teh supreams! :P

so so so bored.


It sorta just dawned on me, the amount of work I need to do before school starts.

Which is on monday.

okay.

Great.

You Dont Know Stupidity

Something I dont understand :

When people ask you "how long do you think you two will last"

- as in talking about you and your significant other.

I find that quite stupid.

Do people plan when they think they're gonna last till?

"hmmm maybe three months if We're lucky. After Four, imma have to break up with her"

Well for all those people who ask me this

the answer is

I dont plan to break up with nicholas


I plan to keep him :)

Forever and ever.


I just uh, dont understand some people sometimes.

When will you ever learn.

Its not love If it isnt forever.

Maybe thats too much to ask for some.

But forever is one thing I do have. And I only want to give it to nicholas.

He has my forever.



we will be together




forever.



stupid people.

[jonnyp]

One of the sweetest guys ever.
Thanks so much sweetie.....
I hope you and Rhea are very happy together,
You deserve it...
Your so lucky, shes very beautiful.
Thank you for all the little conversations :)
They mean something to me always.
You deserve to be happy, your such a sweet guy.
Your always there to talk to 
For god knows how long
when i just talk and talk and talk about my self.
You never let me feel bad :)
I appreciate it so much
And it means so much to me.
Say Hi to Rhea for me.

Love you jonny. 

bertie: how are you an nick?
me: perfect....
bertie: how long do you think you will last?
me: forever and ever
bertie: awwwwww! if he dumps yuou (HE WONT) what would you do?
me:...ide die..





bertie: have you told him about that time at mine?
me: oh yah! he smokes weed sometimes tew...
bertie: OMG HES SO PERFECT FOR YOU
me: he is isnt he :)

June 1st. 2005.

Dear diary,

Figured Ide set this out correctly. Todays been pretty uneventfull, you could say. Mom insisted I woke up early. And my early I mean eleven. Which Is early, I was tired. So yeah, I was like "uggh" And put on some music and got washed. Spoke to teh Matthew first thing, best way to start they day Ide say. First thing he said to me was "I smell of cum". Just made my day, right there. We're planning on going to the movies tomorrow perhaps to watch Mr. and Mrs. Smith, as we had previously discussed the undeniable hawtness of teh Angelina Joli.
My mother thinks Im on Crack. Its all good.
Smiles everywhere.
I woke up this morning, missing Nicholas :) He liked the love letter I wrote for him. Which means alot. Because everything I said, I ment it with all my heart. So thats defiantly good.
I was thinking alot today, about relationships. Philosophising you know? Because I can do that. I have teh brain power you see. Maybe more on that later, too much effort to type it.

Mom taking my brother and shaun to see Millions. Or whatever. At maybe 8:00? so I get some alone time with mah house. Apart from the teh random dude that lives with us. but its Okay, We dont talk. lol.

I wish I could write as fast As I type.

Infact, I wish I Could think as fast as I type.

I got another Msg from a delightful Turkish man.


Letter number: 39858380
From: [onurhıdır]
To: [choke_on_dreams] ([x][+] Suck My Strap-On [+][x])
Sent mail 2005-06-01 12:28:31
Comment in 39858462




HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII HOW ARE YOU SEXY BABY???
SEND YOUR MSN OR YAHOO ADDRESS PLSSSS
MY MSN AND YAHOO ADDRESS onurcakmak23@hotmail.com
onurcakmak2334@yahoo.com
ADD TO FAVOURITE PEOPLE PLSSS
BECAUSE I AM YOUR NEARLY MEET WANT


[+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++]

My reply was :



I BE SORRY I NO NO SPEAK ENGLISH NO!


Insane. Isnt it?

Yes it is rather.


Spoke to my mom last night about the whole nicholas situation.

I have to take it slowly, take my time. Give her time, to accept it. It doesnt seem like much but its another step. No matter how insignificant or tedious it seems, its all worth it. Something in a bigger picture.

You dont know my mother.

She can be woman bloody hitler if she wants to be.

Aahh. I have my music up so loud.
My ears.
My beautiful ears.
Did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?

You Dont Know Stupidity

Today was a much Better day.
Spoke to mah nicholas.
Everything is ay-okay.
Infact things are really good.
Im so happy.
I love him So
very very much.
Means Everything to me.
He is everything.

Teh day started of sorta odd.
Kinda S a d
Following on from last night.
But now things are better than ever


Nicholas,
believe me when I say this,

Nothing Can stop us now...

I promise you that