[choke_on_dreams]'s diary
Its just the small things Nicholas does
That makes me // [xxxS0 hAppeHxxxx]//
For ::: example :::
Hes at work currently
But he sent me a msg
From his phone...
saying:::
[I love you baby :) mwah]Things going ay okay.
Sometimes it just feels like
I cant make it through the week
I have so much shit
To do
and Im the worst at
organising anything.
I leave things to the last minute
and by the last minute
I mean
Usually the minute after the last.
Which is not good.
I dont know how im going to do all of this .
K you know what?
I have lots of things to do this week.
Its going to be difficult
My chemistry c/w is due in
on
Friday.
K, This may be an issue since I havnt actually started it.
But its okay.
I also have in all my media c/w in for thursday
Ive done some of it.
Okay. Major thing now:::
MATHS EXAM ON WEDNESDAY
Seriously Have to revise for that.You dont understand.
And I have english in for like friday. But thats not really a problem.
So What I need to do..
Media and some revision tonight
Media and some revision tomorrow night
Finish it tomorrow night...(media)
Then.
Chemistry coursework on wednesday thursday
hand it in on
.Friday.
Thats okay.
Do english sometime.
Its okay.
K.
I can do that.
kthxbye
It was Beautiful.
...We had spoke plenty earlier that day...
We didnt want to say our G0odby3s.
Its always so [♥harD♥].
He had his house alone to himself :(
My house was [ FulL ] of people.
It was so lonely.
But then, just before I went to [.Zz.Sleep.zZ.].
It was [-4-] eh am
I called him.
In my room.
The lights were off.
The moon was [.Leaking.] into my ♥room♥.
I felt empty
I needed him.
He seemed happy to talk to me *blush*
The sky was light.
It was beatufiul♥
We spoke for quite a long time.
It was so ♥[.B.]eautifu[.L.]♥
And just S♥ [R0mantiC]
There was a .s.i.l.e.n.c.e
And he said :
"Oh, My Little [.X//x. Princess .x\\x.]"It made me Flutter.x.x.x.
And then he sang to me,
He has a ♥Beautiful♥ [x...V0ice...x]
He sang...
[+Incy Wincy +Spider+]
and -Hummed-...
[**x**Twinkle Twinkle Little Star**x**]
I cant even begin to describe how close
I felt to him
that night.
It was Perfect
I could almost...
Reach out
And
[x-xKiss himx-x]He had my sunrise.
He has Me.
Wow lots to say today. Maybe a seperate entry for each of the major things you know :P
Well firstly, nicks just left for work.
I dont know why I make it such a big deal,
I mean im going to be speaking to him tomorrow night
once he gets back from saving the world and everything.
My hero.
And also, I should be happy with all the time
I got to spend with him this weekend
It was basically just us :)
We were so close
As close as we could be with an ocean in between us.
But more about that later.
Anyway, I was talking to my mother
and she was lecturing me
about something I did wrong
as usual
but anyway, just as we were leaving to go to bed
the phone rang
and she picked it up
(it was nicholas)
and she said "is it nick?"
and i was like "NO MOM"
cos i figured that cos she was mad at me at the time
she'de proabbly be like "Nicholas, Malavika is busy" or something lame.
But she didnt :)
She conversed with him.
and I was so proud of her.
It was hard for her to do but
she was actually smiling
and laughing etc
She also said he was very "handsome"
and im like "mom - hes hawt"
hehehe.
Things are looking good :)
Things will work out,
Im sure of that
undoubtedly.
I guess the only problem here is time.
I can wait.
He can wait.
But I dont have time to be patient
I want him now.
We spoke briefly and said our goodbyes :)
Im so silly sometimes *blush*
And now hes gone
But its okay
I can speak to him tomorrow right
and its going to be fun fun fun :)
Well this entry is getting too big.
Ill make another one now about another aspect of our
beautiful relationship
------ .Welcome to my ♥[.N.i.c.h.o.l.a.s.]♥. ------Because nothing compares :) I love him with all my .<3.h.e.a.r.t.<3. The most beautiful Man I know. Madly in love with ["Teh gym",] music, and ofcourse me. Has the most beautiful smile ever. Makes me .Melt. Likes to eat at subway ;) Makes teh kyootest typos. H4w7 hair :O
[- x .]My best friend[. x -]
-My Boyfriend-
Incredibly .sexy. - beyond words. Now our relationship can take over [<3Elftown<3] too. We are on a roll. Uses big words to seem >.inteligent.<, but hes really not. hehe im joking poop. Hes very clever *Nerd*;) uh. has the reading age of maybe a 3 year old[.?.] but still, hes cute, so it doesnt matter. Forgets things really easily. ["OOH OOH OH MALLY!.....oh i forgot"] sorta thing. you get used to it.
.E.x.t.r.e.a.m
//{YOU}♥[EFFING]♥//Rawk.[Me and hatty walking to ballet.]
me: *ever so seriously* so how are things with martyn?
hatty: things are good :)
me: aah good good :) *even more seriously* are you still climaxing regularily?
hatty: *pause and stares*
A thousand [.x.Kisses.x.] My way.
Nick doesnt want anyone to know he;s THAT sexual. K?
me: im on my bed. with my head in the duvet and my legs huddled up and my ass in the air.
nick: awww
*silance*
nick: kay well i come up behind you and..
me: nick!
nick: the ONLY Way I want to lose my virginity is with you. At the same time as your losing yours.
[#TOP#] wow
Im .15. For a moment
Caught inbetween .10. and .20.
[.15. Theres still time for you.]
I think that Part of the reason that this world is so screwed up right now is because of a little thing we call Fear. People are just so scared of what they dont know what they dont understand What they cant see What they cant touch This causes you to shut youself down in an fighting effort to not feal what that Fear sometimes makes you feel like. Lost. Alone. C0nfused? Unfortunatly this makes things worse. By seperating your hearts from the ones around you, Your just causing yourself to live a life filled with numbness Nothingness. Acceptance of difference is the catalyst for... Well.. For the changes that are coming to be positive. You must understand that really there is nothing to fear in these changes. Whats happening in the world is for the best. It may not seem like it now I am life. You are life. Another thing. Whatever you believe in terms of spirituality is okay Because What everything means can only be comprehended by you. But you have tor realise that your truth and your meaning is no better than some one else's because they are all one. Its so simple But so cryptic [x.We can only understand what we are ready to understand.x]
Who am I? A question that warrants my attention. Deep longings to become aware. Awareness beyond this existence. Am I really there?